Noms

With a yawn passing your lips, you shook your head in a desperate attempt to clear your thoughts. You were exhausted, and hard as you tried, you couldn't help your eyes from crossing as you tried to focus on counting the tills. 

Hopeless.

Somewhere behind you, the broom swept in lazy, uneven strokes—Steve clearly as tired as you were. 

"Wanna swap?" You hummed over your shoulder. 

"What?"

"Wanna count the tills while I sweep?"

"Not really, no." The words passed Steve's lips as a chuckle, and you rolled your eyes with one of your own. 

"Come on, Harrington. I've been staring at these numbers for ten minutes, and if they don't stop dancing on the page, neither one of us is going home any time soon."

"Sounds like we'll spend the night here, then," he flashed you a sheepish smile as he continued to sweep up popcorn kernels and crunched up receipts. 

"You're telling me you have literally nothing better to do?"

"Better than spending time with you?" He huffed a laugh. "Hardly."

"Seriously?" Your voice dipped with curiosity as you paused your counting. "Harrington. Not even a steamy date?"

"First of all, I’m spent. Secondly, I've come to realize that dating—?" He sent a pointed look your way. "Overrated."

“Since when?”

“Since two days ago. C'mon, keep up.”

“Since your date with what’s-her-name? And here I was, thinking you had a great time getting it going with her in your backseat,” you grinned, brows rising and falling with your amusement. 

“Nothing wrong with the sex. It’s just—everything else that’s lacking.”

“Well, at least you’re having sex.“

The broom stopped moving.

Steve blinked, a joke already on his lips before it faded into something else. “Wait,” he said, straightening slowly. His tone shifted, confused. “You’re not?”

Fuck. 

"I—" Your lips parted and closed in your desperation to find something to say. Anything to say: to fix the way you'd taken the conversation to an area neither of you had planned to go. 

Yet there was no fixing it, was there?

No. He knew. 

He obviously knew.

"How long since—"

"I don't—," you let out a breath. "It's not like I've been keeping count. A few weeks. Maybe a—," you wet your lips. "A couple of months."

"A couple of—Jesus fuck. But you see your boyfriend almost every day." Steve's brows remained furrowed, his eyes studying your frame with intensity that made it clear he was trying to solve the equation in his head.

Just like you had, for months. 

"Wait. Does he not—"

"Want me anymore?" Your chuckle was dry, the bitterness in it audible. 

"You know that's not how I meant it."

"But it's the truth, isn't it?" Intentional or not, it was the first time you had ever admitted to being in a sexless relationship, and suddenly it dawned on you. The depth to which the insecurities it had woken up within you reached. The damage it had done to your self-esteem.

"No," Steve shook his head as he took slow steps towards you, his broomstick now long forgotten, leaning against the counter. "No, this has nothing to do with you."

"Steve, it's me he doesn't—"

"No."

"No?" You shook your head, a touch of careful amusement in the knit of your brows. "What do you mean, no?"

"I'm not gonna listen to you talk yourself down when you're obviously not the problem here." He shook his head, a touch of concern in his eyes. And then, with a chuckle he said, ever so slightly rushed: "Jesus Christ, if you were mine, I'd make you cum every day."

You blinked.

"Steve—"

"I probably shouldn't say it, but fuck it. I mean it. If you were mine—," he shook his head. "All the time."

The words traveled down your touch-starved body, leaving goosebumps in their wake. It had been so goddamn long since you had felt good. 

Satisfied. 

Wanted, and craved, and yearned for, and in the darkened eyes of Steve you could see it all. 

He meant what he had said.

It was that desperation that you blamed for the insanity that took over you, for the words you spoke next were ones you normally never would have said out loud.

"So why don't you?"

It was Steve's time to blink, his lips parting and his brows furrowing. "Are you saying what I think you're—"

"I did keep count and it's been three months, Steve." Your voice cracked ever so slightly. "Three months, and I can't keep begging for it. I can't do this anymore. I can't—"

His lips on yours.

Never in your life had you answered a kiss as fast as you answered Steve's: your hand sliding to the side of his neck, as his snaked to the back of your head to guide you closer to him. 

But closer wasn't close enough, was it?

No, it turned out that the kiss—his tongue brushing against yours—was only deepening the burn you felt within you.

Your desperation.

Your starvation.

"Steve—" You breathed out against his lips, chuckling as he stole a kiss and another from you. "Are you sure this is—? I don't want to use you."

"You're not using me," he hummed, his eyes full of raw honesty as he looked at you. "You don't have a clue of how long I've wanted this. You."

"You have—?"

"For months."

Fuck.

"Don't say that—"

"I'm only saying it because it's the truth," he chuckled. "Do you have any idea how bad it's sucked to go on a date after a date after a date when you've been right here? But you're taken, and I thought you were happy, so—"

"I'm not," you admitted.

"Then let me make you feel good, yeah? Let me make you happy, even if it's just for a moment."

You nodded your head once and thrice, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips as his lips found their way back to yours. 

His hands on your body were everything you had craved for months. His fingers warm as they found their way to your hips, sliding under your shirt. Not groping, just feeling your skin against his. 

Enjoying every breath, every moan that passed your lips like it was all he had ever wanted.

All he had ever needed.

You had almost forgotten how it felt like to be craved like Steve craved you. 

Deep and raw. 

So goddamn good as he deepened the kiss, one hand on your cheek, caressing, and the other moving to the fastenings of your jeans.

"I need to taste you so bad—"

"Steve, please."

"Fuck, you sound so good when you beg," he chuckled against your lips as your fingers, impatient, replaced his in getting your jeans off you. "Such a needy girl. Gonna cum for me so good, yeah?"

"Yeah," you beamed as he helped you up on the counter, your legs spread for him. 

It was all you needed.

To feel Steve's mouth on you, his fingers in you, working on guiding you closer and closer and only ever closer to your orgasm.

Yet even in your desperate need, you had not anticipated how good he'd feel: how right as his fingers moved to slide along your slit.

"Fuck, baby, you're dripping—"

You were, your pussy now clenching around thin air from the mere whisper of his fingers on you. 

"All for you," you managed a chuckle, enjoying the way Steve's eyes darkened at that.

"You have no idea how bad I want that to be true," he breathed out, his voice low. "How bad I want to make you mine."

"So do," you hummed, eyes sparkling; lips parting as his mouth found its way to your glistening folds.

Fuck.

Your fingers tangled around his hair, desperate to find something to hold onto—for something to ground you.

Steve breathed in your scent, his tongue sliding between your lips from your clit to your entrance and to your clit again.

Flicking and sucking, goddamn devouring.

And you lost it.

Head tilting back, your eyes fluttered shut as you submitted to his licks and caresses: his kisses and his curses.

His praises, as the sweetest of moans and gasps: of cries and pleas passed your lips.

"That's it, darling—" He chuckled against your heat: the warmth of his breath sending the deepest shivers to run down your spine. 

From his tongue, you found the death of a single thought that had ever existed in your mind. From his fingers moving to circle and tease your entrance, you found heaven.

"Fuck, sweetheart—," Steve grinned, his lips moving to kiss your thighs. "You're clenching around nothing. That desperate for more, hm?"

"Steve, please—"

"Good girl." 

Two of his digits slid into you. First knuckle, second knuckle.

By the time the third knuckle was pressing against your opening, his mouth had found contact with your clit once more. 

You could hear just how drenched you were: your arousal surely dripping down his fingers and coating his hand, too, as he curled his digits inside you. 

Knowing exactly how to touch you.

How to kiss you.

How to get your thighs to begin to shake on each side of his head, as his tongue continued its steady pace on your clit. Its movements were exactly what you needed from him: the pressure and pace pushing you closer and closer to your orgasm by each flick, lick and circle drawn around it.

You were so close, so fucking close that all you needed was to glance down at him to see the look in his eyes as he kept his eyes locked on you.

The burn there.

Come for me, his eyes told you. Come for me, baby. I got you. I got you.

And that reminder—that promise was all you needed.

With a desperate call for his name, you stumbled over the edge: your thoughts clouding and your body trembling as you came shaking on his fingers and tongue, the man glowing from the sight.

From the sounds.

From the feeling of you clenching around his fingers as he made your orgasm last and last, until you were squirming away from his touch, breathless yet glowing. 

"Fuck, you're so beautiful—"

"Steve," you laughed with a shake of your head. 

"I mean it. Jesus Christ, you're perfect."

"Yours."

"It sure sounded like it," he chuckled, nipping his bottom lip between his teeth as he looked at you. "You do know that this is what you deserve, right? To be devoured. To be touched like—like they can't keep their hands off you."

"I do now," you offered, smiling as Steve closed his distance to you once more. 

To have him between your legs was one thing. To have Steve draw you into the deepest kiss—to taste yourself on his lips and tongue—was a whole other kind of divine.

"You did so good." His words were chuckled against your lips between kisses, his fingers caressing your cheek. "Think you can handle a little more? Don't wanna hurt you—"

"You never could."

"Ah," he cringed. "Don't say that yet."

"How would you—"

The sound of him undoing his zipper caught your attention, and with your bottom lip nipped between your teeth you allowed your gaze to travel down his body. 

Down and down, until you were met with the sight of him in all his glory. He was twitching, the tip of his cock glistening with precum, and the size—

F u c k.

Steve's fingers landing on your bottom jaw, he closed your gaping mouth.

"Like I said—," he cocked a brow. 

"We'll just—"

"Take it slow?" He offered.

"Yeah."

"Yeah," he chuckled as his thumb brushed against your lower lip, teasing. "I know you can take it all like the good girl you are though, can't you?"

"Steve—," your whine was breathless, and the way you slid closer to him on the counter was an answer enough. And yet, the words just had to slip from your lips, didn't they? "Fuck me. Please."

"My girl's so impatient, isn't she?"

The feeling of him aligning himself with your dripping wet opening clouded your thoughts, and as he eased into you an inch at a time—his lips on yours muffling your moans—it was all you had ever wanted.

Steve's cock in you, stretching you open, was all you had ever needed.

Breathing out each other's names like prayers, he rested his forehead against yours. 

"Fuck, baby—"

"Y'feel so good—"

"Not there yet," he chuckled, his voice low and raspy with his need for you. "No pain?"

"No, Steve. Need—need more."

"That's my girl."

That you were.

"Take a deep breath for me, yeah?"

You did, your chest rising as he continued sliding into you. 

"Fucking hell, sweetheart—" Steve cursed. "There you go. That's it. Taking it so fucking good—"

Fuck, you were, weren't you? Your body was opening up for him, your wetness making it so easy for him to slide in and bottom out—both of you cursing as his crotch ground against yours.

"Fuck, Steve—"

"There you go. That's it, baby. Making me so damn proud—"

It's like you were made for each other. His length, his girth, the way he seemed to fill you up in a way no one else ever had. In a way no one else ever would, you were sure as he slid out of you almost completely before sliding back in.

"Tell me you want this, baby. Tell me you want me to fuck you—"

"Need it, Steve," you breathed out. "Need you to fuck me so bad."

"Good girl," he chuckled, and with that he picked up his pace. 

Each thrust of his cock, hot and heavy and fucking pulsating inside you coaxed moans and breaths and whimpers only more desperate than the previous from your lips. 

"You're so beautiful like this—" His lips pressed sloppy kisses onto your skin as he fucked into you. "Knew you would be such a good girl for me. Fuck, sweetheart. Been thinking about you like this for months—"

"Fuck, Steve—"

"Wondering how you'd feel wrapped around me. The amount of times I touched myself before our shifts together, praying that by whatever miracle you'd be mine—" He cursed under his breath as he bottomed out once more. "And now you are, aren't you? My good fucking girl—"

His words were traveling straight down your body, the familiar heat starting to build up at the pit of your stomach.

"Yours, Steve—"

"Tell me again."

His movements inside you were ruthless: his cock hitting the exact right spot to make you cry out his name again and again, so fucking fast and deep—

"'M yours," you cried out against his lips. "All yours—"

"Yeah, you are," he chuckled. "That's it, sweetheart—"

"Steve—"

"Don't hold back," he kissed you, sloppy. "Don't hold back, baby. Wanna see you cum around my cock."

"Fuck, yes—"

"That's it—"

You were so close.

So goddamn close, that all it took was Steve's chuckle against your cheek. "Wanna hear you scream my name so goddamn loud there's not a single doubt who it is that you belong to, alright?"

And you came undone. 

"Fuck, Steve!"

Your orgasm washed over you, your thoughts clouded and your walls milking him as you came undone around him. 

So fucking good.

"There you go. Fuck, baby—"

He was close, wasn't he? 

The way his fingers tightened around your hips was nothing but an unneeded confirmation: in his eyes you could see it all.

His need for you.

His desperation for you.

"Come here," you chuckled against his lips. "Gonna suck you off, alright?"

"Fuck—"

"I'll take that as a yes," you purred as you jumped off the counter and got on your knees for him. 

Up close, his cock was only ever bigger, and for the briefest of moments you nearly regretted your decision.

Only nearly.

No, for you were his champ and his champ was made for taking him down your throat. 

He was glistening with your juices, and as you closed your mouth around the tip you could taste both yourself and his precum on your tongue.

It was so dirty. 

In it, so fucking good.

"Look at me, baby—"

You did, your pretty eyes sparkling as they found Steve's. 

"Holy fuck—"

You twirled your tongue around his girth, enjoying the weight of him on your tongue. Enjoying the way his fingers moved to caress your cheek.

His touches so adoring, weren't they?

"Fuck, that's it—"

He was getting close: twitching against the roof of your mouth. Breathing through your nose, you relaxed your throat and took him only ever deeper.

"Jesus Christ—"

Fuck, he was perfect, and suddenly it dawned upon you. It wasn't only the depraved, desperate, touch-starved part of you that wanted to be his.

You wanted him. 

You wanted to be his. 

Actually his.

In your eyes he must have seen it all, for with the deepest of curses for your name he came for you, thick ropes of his cum shooting down your throat.

"God—"

He was glowing, his hands moving to run through his hair as the deepest of chuckles pushed past his lips.

"You're fucking incredible—"

"You're only saying that—," you grinned as you popped him out of your mouth, "because you just came down my throat, Harrington."

"Maybe," he stretched the Ms. "Or maybe it just took me this damn long to realize that I—," he wet his lips with a shake of his head. And then, crouching on the ground next to you, he spoke, his voice deep with—with raw honesty. "Leave him."

"What?"

"Leave your boyfriend."

"Steve—"

"Leave him for me." His eyes twinkled as they found yours. "Leave him and I promise—"

Your lips on his shut him up, and as his fingers slid to the side of your neck to deepen the kiss it was—different, wasn't it? 

Gentle.

Adoring.

Your voice was a breathless chuckle as you nodded your head once and thrice. "Alright."

You were his.

When you two woke up and you told him you’d like to decorate the tree because Christmas is today and you two haven’t decorated it yet, his excitement was around the level of space. He knew that you like to decorate it on the actually day of Christmas, however, if he had been able to, he would have make the tree on the day you bought it. This morning, his eyes lightened up like a little kid’s. Days before this day, he already told you about ways to make the decorating perfect. To be honest, it felt like he was too excited about it. When you and him went to buy the tree, his eyes were shining like the sun. Back at Tannyhill the three has always been chosen by Sarah or Rose, it was also decorated by them, the way they liked it.

This year is different though. Since the day he moved into your house, his soul started calming down in a way he never expected it could. And as Christmas was getting closer, his old anxiety around the holiday started to fade away. He knew he wouldn’t go around his old place, at least not by himself. He hasn’t been around since he moved out half a year ago. He met Sarah a few times, their relationship has become a little bit lighter than it was before, she’s still not the brightest star in Rafe’s eyes though. He’s not angry at her, he just feels pity for himself, and jealousy for her.

So when you see his stirred smile while he’s adjusting the tree, you don’t have doubts about him finally finding his real home. He finally looks like he’s excited about Christmas. About the holiday that includes being with family, spending time together with them with a warm smile and heart.

When he finally finds the perfect spot for the tree, he looks at it proudly. It’s like a success he’s been waiting for a long time. The warm moment gets cut by you when you call for him once again.

“Rafe.. where’s the honey, baby?” You ask once again, this time he shakes his head and finally heads out to the kitchen where you are preparing the dough for the gingerbread. “You can’t dress them up if I can’t bake them.”

“I left the jar in the garage. I’ll just go and grab-“

“No!” You say it too quickly. “I mean.. You stay. You need to check on the turkey. No one is better than you when it comes to decide if it’s good already or not.” You smile and turn to the sink to wash your hands. A wave of nervousness runs through you for a moment.

“Are you okay? You look weird. Did I do something?” He looks worried, his eyes filled confusion, you can’t help melt at his expression. You walk up to him and cup his face with your hands.

“You’re handsome, a sweetheart and I love you. You didn’t do anything.” You smile softly and before he could answer, you press your lips on his to leave a soft kiss on it. He kisses back gently, almost carefully.

When he pulls back, he smiles and it warms your heart. Not just your heart, your whole soul. He is so pure, vulnerable and so beautiful as he is standing in front of you. That’s the way he looks at you every single time you say such sweet things to him. His big blue eyes are staring into yours like they were the most precious pair of eyes on this world, because they really are in his eyes.

“I guess I can check on the turkey.”

You give him one more kiss, on the cheek this time, then turn your back and start walking towards the garage door. You are hiding your surprise gift for him in there so you can’t let him to find out.

You spot the jar on the drawer, you grab it immediately and before you turn back to return to the kitchen, you look at the gift sitting on a box. A few moments later, you finally return to Rafe, he is standing behind the counter, the turkey is out of the oven. It looks perfect.

The smell fills up the kitchen, he observes the turkey with a slight hidden smile. “Baby, it turned out to be perfect.”

“Of course it did. Without you, it would be screwed up but lucky to have a professional around.” You grin as you put down the jar on the counter and open it with a definite movement.

His cheeks get warm and pinkish, deep pink to be specific. His eyes follow every little momentum of yours as you continue working on the dough. He walks up next to you and observes the way you move your hands, the way your eyes are focused on making the best of it, the way the corner of your mouth is up and the way your eyes meet his when he looks down at you with admiration.

His eyes fall back on the dough, now it’s ready to get shapes from it. And before you could continue work on it, his voice stops you.

“Can I try it?” He says with a smile filled with excitement and hope.

“You mean the dough?” You let out a soft chuckle and he nods. You take a tiny part of the dough between two fingertips and move it to his mouth. “Well, try it then. But it’s you who always tells me I shouldn’t eat the raw dough because it can cause me problems.”

“Yeah, I really do say that but..” He stops for a moment and looks into your eyes then back at the dough, still in front of his mouth. “I always wanted to try raw gingerbread. I was always scared to ask Rose to let me try it out and when Sarah was baking with Kie, I was just.. It didn’t feel okay.” His eyes meets yours again and before you could say anything, he takes the dough from your fingers.

“Sweet. Just like you.”

You didn’t expect the tree decorating to turn out so intense when you first thought about it. You have already done it many times before, you knew how to do it. It didn’t seem to be difficult. But Rafe was feeling deeply when you finally showed up with the box filled with every kind of decor he could imagine. He was planning before, he had ideas but now in the actual situation? He’s looking at it like a project that needs to win.

“Okay, okay.. I think.. Oh.. So I think we should uh..” He looks into the box, eyes searching for anything but the things in there, his mind is running a hundred miles per hour. “I know we should do it in a way that-“

“Rafe.” You speak up

“No, so when you want to start it, you probably need to make a plan you know? Like.. Uh..”

“Rafe!” You place a hand on his shoulder, he finally shifts, turns behind to face you and stays quiet like he is waiting for to be told what to do at this point. “Just.. Calm down. Relax.”

“I just want it to be perfect, baby.”

Your heart shifts, this poor boy feels like just a small child in front of you and your heart is aching to make him feel like he can do whatever he wants to.

“I know.” You smile sweetly, you take his hand and look up to him. “You don’t have to overcomplicate it. You just have to feel it. It’s not based on a plan, this is not a task, you just..” with your free hand, you take out a piece of decoration and place it somewhere it looks nice to you. “Place it wherever you feel like it.” You keep his hand in yours and feel a gentle squeeze coming from him. “You can make a plan but.. At the end going with the flow will feel much better than overcomplicating it.”

He’s looking at you with big eyes behind his glasses, understanding your words with pure expression. He appreciates you too much and wants to show you his awesome skills so badly. But he nods when he understands what you say.

Hand still in hand, he takes out a decoration out of the box as well and looks at the tree like it’s an equation. But after a few seconds of thinking, he just places it, somewhere near the top.

His life has always been covered in tasks, things to solve and to be honest, he loved them. Whenever he can just use his brain to create something that looks cool and can impress others, he is genuinely happy. Decorating the Christmas tree didn’t feel good since her mother died though.

Ever since then, Christmas felt forced. He liked the food and meals, however, he mostly only used to eat from them when no one was around. It felt embarrassing to enjoy it in front of his father, it always does. He has always been a disappointment to him because he is not interested in money, in business but anything else. All he has ever wanted to feel is being a little bit appreciated. A little bit seen. A little bit understood. He realized he will never actually want to too see him though.

But there is you.

Now hand in hand, you were decorating the tree. For the first time in his life, he feels like he matters, somebody who is seen and loved. Somebody who is appreciated and taken care of.

During the whole process, Rafe eyes meet yours every few seconds. He feels safe around you, like somebody who can do whatever he wants to and wouldn’t be judged for of it. So as the tree is slowly fully decorated just like as his heart is, he starts noticing a different kind of smile on your face.

“You’re acting weird.” He tells you with a wondered expression.

“Am I? I don’t think so really..” You keep smiling uncontrollably. He looks at you with his confused eyes like you are lying to him. “Okay okay.. I’m just excited about something.”

“Oh, weren’t you excited before? Didn’t you enjoy decorating the tree? Do you want to place the star on it? You can tell if something’s wrong.”

“Rafe!” You chuckle and pull him into a soft kiss. He stays like that for a few moments, melting into the kiss before pulling back. “Calm down, baby. No worries, okay? Everything’s perfect. Much more than perfect.” You keep your eyes on his, your lips are still curled upwards. “And I want it to be you who places the star on the top of the tree. C’mon, finish your work.”

Rafe blushes, feeling a bit embarrassed, probably because of thinking of some other kind of finishing. But he can’t even focus on that when you’re standing right in front of him with your eyes full of love, staring up at him like he is worthy of looking at.

“That sounds like a responsibility.” he spills out after a few moments of silence.

“Just do it.”

Rafe nods before picking up the star and look at the top of the tree. He steps closer and carefully places it. It feels like a dream come true. His inner child is absolutely going crazy right now. But he’s just smiling softly, his eyes switching up between you and the tree every few moments.

“Do you like it? Does it exceed your expectations?”

“It definitely does.” He keeps smiling and your heart softens once again. Your big baby is so sweet. “When can I give you my gift?” The red on his cheeks appear again and when you think he can’t become more adorable, he does.

“You get yours and I.. I’ll get mine as well.” You tell him and he nods as a response. He disappears at the stairs and you go through the kitchen and head to the garage. You carefully open the door and see the gift checking out the box including her future toys.

There is a good reason you didn’t let Rafe into the garage since last evening. Back then yesterday, Riley, your best friend dropped off his gift. Actually, she brought her in.

When you she told you about her cat’s new kittens two months ago, you immediately knew there is only one gift option for Rafe. A kitten.

In the last 24 hours, you’ve been very nervous about noises, about getting caught, but luckily she stayed calm and quiet most of the time.

You two are friends already, you met her a few times when you spent time at your friend’s house but after all, it isn’t you who’s going to be the queen in her eyes. She’s about to meet her king for life. Your king, to be specific.

So when you start hearing noises from the living room, you pick up a big gift box from the floor and placed it under your armpit, in your other arm, you are holding the small kitty.

Slowly and carefully, you make your way out from the garage, taking small steps towards the living room. You don’t want to take long though, you don’t want to make her uncomfortable in your arm so you quicken your steps and reach the living room. He doesn’t look at you immediately because he is placing down the gift box under tree. However, when he shifts up and turns behind to take a look at you..

His expression is the most precious one you’ve ever seen.

You can’t decide if he is panicking, about to cry, processing, excited or just simply shocked but behind the glasses and those blue eyes, you see the spark you’ve been hoping for. You step closer and he does as well. You look down at the kitten for a moment, having a fear of her might being scared but they’re looking at one another like two friends who haven’t seen each other in a long time.

“Wha… Oh my God. Is he.. she.. uh.. are they.. who are they?” He asks with a hopeful tone and a trembling voice.

“She is your kitten.”

“My kitten? You mean my kitten? Can I.. Can I hold her? Or just touch her? Or uh..”

You step closer to him and look down at her than him, nodding so he can take her away. He holds out his hands and carefully takes her away, he treats her like she was made of glass.

“Hey” He smiles down at her, his smile is trying to grow wider, it just can’t anymore. “What’s her name? Does she have a name? Can I name her?”

You hold your hands up in the air and speak softly “She’s all yours. You’re free to do whatever you’d like to.”

The kitty clings to him and starts purring immediately as her head is getting buried into his biceps. “I don’t even know what to say.. this is..” He is staring down at her, cheeks are still colored red. “I have a kitten. We have a kitten.”

You chuckle sweetly at his words and his expression, as you step beside him, you wrap an arm around him. He speaks up quietly, voice filled with a slight of sadness for a moment “I’ve always dreamt of having a cat. When I was six, I had a one called Noodle but he disappeared. My dad never let me to get a pet after that because he found me irresponsible.”

 Your heart aches because of his words, you want to speak up but when he takes your small hand in his with his free, your voice breaks and he speaks up instead. “We need to buy her everything. She needs toys, best kind of food. She also needs bowls, a hundred percent.” He tells you with an excited smile then his eyes shift to the box you brought with yourself before.

Your gaze follows his, your heart speeds up in excitement. “What about that one?” Rafe raises his eyebrows.

“Hmm.. what about them? You won’t find out, unless you open it, baby.” You give his hand a squeeze before pulling your arms back from him so he can go to the box. That’s the way he does, he puts the kitty down on the floor and she starts exploring straight away. He walks to the couch where it was placed when you came in then sits down and starts observing the gift box.

“Open it.” You ask him to do, mostly because of the impatience of yours. Just as you say so, he starts removing the bow from the top of it so he can open it up.

When he does so, his wide smile appears again. “You.. read my mind.” He giggles sweetly and looks into the box even more. He sees a few cans of high quality kitten food , the kind he already told you about when he was talking about people’s bad habits when it comes to having pets.

Next to the food, there are three kinds of toys. The first one is a rainbow fish, hanging down from a white wand. The second is a box of springs in literally every color possible. The third one is a blue tunnel with a dangling ball.

But you also thought about picking some nice bowls for the kitten, you bought one for water and one for food as well. They don’t have any unique motives on them, one of them is baby pink and the other one is lavender purple.

Rafe looks very amused and happy as he takes everything out of the box so he can have a better look at each of them. “I can’t believe you actually thought about everything. And you.. you made it perfect. Just the way-“

“Just the way you would do it.” You say and both of you let out a soft titter. Rafe can’t help but agree with your words. “My gift includes a cat tree as well but.. I didn’t want to choose it without you. So if you are okay with it, after Christmas we could go out and take a look at them.”

He is just staring at you with entertained expression for a few moments before speaking up. “Would like nothing more than that.” His eyes are looking around in the living room and notice the fluffy tabby being interested with the gift that is waiting for you under the tree. He looks up at you then back at the gift. “You should take a look at yours as well.”

You are grinning broadly immediately before walking to the tree and sit down on the carpet underneath you. The box has dandelions on it with white background some green leaves. You’ve always loved dandelions because they are common but never really appreciated by most of the people. They are just simple but adorable, just like the young man staring at you from the coach. Except he is far away from simple.

You open up the box and hear Rafe standing up behind you, taking steps closer until he sits down next to you, his hips pressed against yours. You can already see the content of it but the time it actually hits you is when he reaches out and turns on the little led lights that were turned off before. The box now is lightened up and you can see the pictures of the two of you on the top of it with small red and pink hearts drawn around them.

Inside it, you can see your favorite snacks, the chips and chocolates you always buy, your favorite kind of gummy bears and cans of soda. You also see the even more pictures and even a few smaller drawings about you or the two of you, made by him. Also, a little painting, picturing your favorite photo together with him. You see letters stocked up in the right corner of the box, about 10 if you count it right. All of these make your heart race but the cutest one just makes you melt in your place.

“No shit..” Your eyes lighten up even more than before when you take out the DIY panda. On the outside of it, white and black paper roses can be seen, they are glued on the base of the animal. “It’s so cool!”

“I know it’s not a big gift or anything.. I just wanted something more complicated than uh.. buying a bracelet or something. I mean making one could had been a great idea! Oh screw it, only if I had thought about it earlier..” Rafe says panicked but you quickly break him out from it by wrapping your arms around him and hold him close.

“It’s perfect. More than perfect. It’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever gotten. It’s unique, mindful and.. so you.” You whisper to his ears with your sweet voice, his body shifts into you more and relaxes against you as he wraps his arms around you as well.

None of you say anything for a while. You don’t even know how long you are staying like that, the only thing you know your hearts are racing against each other’s but slowly calm down as one.

“So you like it? Are you sure?” He asks, his tone is still doubtful but less panicked. He is still resting against you.

“I love it, Rafe.” You place soft kisses on his neck as you whisper again “But not as much as I love you.”

He pulls back, just enough to be able to see your face. His lips break into a heartwarming smile before leaning in and press his lips against yours. You kiss him back, your lips are moving slowly and gently so both of you can just live in the moment and feel everything.

Shortly later, he pulls back to catch his breath, the pink blush returning on his face once again. He is sweet, pure and he is all yours. By the kissing his glasses shifted from their place so you reach out to fix them.

The kitty breaks your bonding moment by finding the best toy in the whole room, one of the pine balls hanging down from the tree.

“I think she needs your attention.” You grin at him before looking at her.

“First, she needs our attention. Second, she also needs a name.” He is looking at the cat, concentrating, and thinking of the infinite possibilities when it comes to name his first child. Then after a minute of silence, he slips the name out. “Snickers.”

“Snickers? That’s adorable!” You say with an amused grin then look at her. “But why? I mean it fits her, she could literally be Snickers.. but where did that come from?”

“Well, you love snickers. It’s one of your favorites and I always buy you when I go to the shop. This reminds me of her as well, if I need to get her food, I’ll have a reminder because I always buy snickers for you.” He tells you with a proud smile on his face. “And yeah, it fits her as well.”

You’re impressed by his way of choosing name, it’s funny and charming at the same time. You can tell he is happy with his own decision too.

He calls Snickers to him, she listens like it’s the most natural thing in the world. Him and Snickers are already in love with each other, you almost feel like you should become jealous but even if you tried to, you couldn’t be. You just got the most adorable gift ever, it was made by his own hands. Also, after seeing him with his kitten, him looking down at her like she was his child, you couldn’t ask for anything more than this.

And next to you, the sweetest boyfriend ever, Rafe feels the same way.

He never expected Christmas to be so good. Every Christmas in his life that has passed, it was about Sarah all the time, his picture-perfect sister. She was the one who always got the gifts she wanted and asked for. It wasn’t even about the gifts, it was just the way Sarah was treated and Rafe wanted to be just a quarter as much important as she was to their dad.

It was never meant to be that way though.

Not to him, but to you he was everything.

This year, first time in his life, he actually understands what this holiday is about and can’t wait for more with you in the future.

You love him for who he is, you love whatever he says, whatever nerdy interest he has, it doesn’t matter if he is awkward or overthinks because you love him. With you on his side, he realizes Christmas has finally gained a meaning in his eyes. You are the family he has been waiting for in his whole life and he wouldn’t let it go for anything.

 You, Snickers and Rafe is the family all of you has been craving and now you all have it.

a little peek how i imagined your gift:

silence before the storm was the best way to describe the feeling of tanny hill. rafe and you talked on the phone in the morning because he told you you should come over for the evening because his father will travel away for a business trip and will take rose and wheezie with himself.

when the building showed up though, ward camerons car was still at the car driveway. ward and rose has already met you, you could almost say they liked you, at least that was the way they acted. during those months while you were already in a relationship with rafe, you were invited for a few dinners with the family. ward always made sure there was no drama around those times but you still managed to catch them during fights when you arrived in a wrong time.

when you stepped into the house, the air was heavy. and as much as you didn't want to, you could hear the yelling coming down from upstairs. three big suitcases hanging around in the hall, they didn't leave in the time they were supposed to be.

rose showed up all of a sudden. she came out from the kitchen and gave you a smile, trying to wash away the backround sounds.

"hey dear, came to see rafe? he's pretty busy right now, you could wait for him at the balcony." she looked tense but tried to looked calm. she was always so ridiciously obvious to you.

you werent stupid. you heard something falling down, breaking perhaps on the floor above you. you couldnt make it out what rafe and ward was fighting about, your heart ached though as you could see ward on rafe in front of your eyes.

before you could even answer anything, ward was already downstairs with wheezie by his side.

"didn't know you are coming over y/n." ward gave you a smile but you didn't really return it. you hated him. everything he did was making you feel shame for him.

"yeah, it was planned." you answered back. but before you could say anything, he spoke up again.

"we need to leave, got some work to do but make yourself home." he said before vanishing away. suitcases already gone, wheezie and rose were getting into the car. so you decided to let them leave.

there was a time when rafe used to join them on their business trips. however in the last few months he mostly dealed with his own business. he was trying so hard to prove that he's capable of dealing with it on his own. although situations like these couldn't be stopped.

as the house was finally clear, you took long steps to reach the next floor as quickly as you could. when you were up, you slowed down though.

you could hear the heavy breathing coming out from his room, his silent crying made your heart ache. when you reached the already opened door, you saw him. he was taking quick steps around in the room but when you showed up, his eyes met yours.

he was shaking, he was in a state where you rarely found him because he never wanted you to see him like this. he always avoided these situations so you didnt have to see how messed up he was. but when you reached out, his heart shifted.

"it's just fucked up you know." he let out a laugh but there was nothing funny behind it. he was sarcastic.

"rafe.." you stepped closer, said his name with a calm tone, your heart was pounding though.

"you know im trying, dont you? you know right?" he spilled the words with shaky voice, you could feel the weight in your chest. "fuck, im trying! all these bullshits.. you know i do shit! still i.."

you break his words by stepping closer and take his hand. "rafe." you said with a more serious but a gentle tone. it was all in your voice. and as you looked back into his eyes, you saw a tiny bit of change. it wasn't too much but it was enough for the both of you.

"you do so well and so much. and your father will never be able to take that away." you cupped his face in your hands and gently caressed it with your thumb "so dont even start it."

he was quiet. even if he wanted to speak, he wouldn't be able to. so he stayed silent. in these times a part of his wanted to push you away. to not accept the caring touch of yours. but the way you wrapped your arms around him, that part of him was lying on the floor, defeanded. because you were growing more and more onto him and he didnt want it in any other way.

he hugged you back, he was scared to hug you tighter than the minimum because you felt so precious, so priceless in his arms. he was scared to hurt you. you were worth so much more than any business deals of his. it didnt matter how much money he earned by a successed deal. no matter how much a disappointment his father saw in him, he knew he already won something in his life.

but when you noticed his freshly red bruises on his arm, you pulled away a little bit, just to be able to see them properly.

you placed a hand on his arm, your thumb brushed against it, only gently. but with one hand, he forced you to look up at him with a hold on your cheek.

in the moment he was looking at you being so worried, broken by the sight of him, rafe realized that there is one thing that his father will never be able to take away. no matter how much he pushed him, kicked him, hit him. he already won a battle.

"i love you." you heard his silent whisper. he wrapped back his arms around you, not caring about the pain in his arm what ward caused him. he couldnt help but hold you tightly this time, like he was scared you'd ran away in the moment you heard those words coming out from his mouth for the first time.

since you two were official, he never said he loved you. he said you were beautiful. precious. so unmatched. he said you were so jealous when you saw a woman near him and he adored your face when he saw the look you were showing.

he never said he loved you until now though. it felt so scary to him to share such a feeling with somebody. he hasn't felt true love since her mother. he almost thought he forgot how it feels to find peace in someone, just as much as he found peace in his mother as a kid while his dad was there to ruin every moment he could.

but somewhere in the wild he found you. and it felt like a miracle. a healing. a theraphy he never got a chance to have. however, you appeared.

"i love you too, rafe." you whispered back as you were helding him for your dear life.

and in there for once and all, he knew it. he knew there was someone who he actually couldnt live without at this point.