1. Write down your fears. What scares you about being vulnerable? If vulnerability must involve risk, what is that risk for you? Some common fears that work to hinder vulnerability are: A fear that your loved ones will think less of you, a fear that you will appear weak, embarrassment or shame. Dig deeper into some of these and write down where each fear stems from.

2. Identify the people in your life who you currently feel safe to be vulnerable with. It is a privilege to truly know you, and not everyone is deserving. For your own safety, write down the people in your life who you currently feel safe to open up to. Then, jot down the ones who you don’t and identify what is hindering vulnerability with them, can it be fixed?

3. Are you vulnerable with yourself? Gage your own level of self-awareness before you begin to open up to others because it is so frustrating to want to be vulnerable with someone and never having the words. Practice finding the words with yourself first. Journaling or blogging your emotions and feelings in their rawest form is a great start. Asking and answering the tough questions for yourself. Asking others the tough questions about you and your behavior. Self-awareness is key.

4. The difference between vulnerability and radical vulnerability for me has been repositioning my focus on a narrative that makes me look good. I’m not here to just be open about what ails me in life, I’m more focused on sharing the areas where I fall short of the person I aim to be. My vulnerability is not just a method to get things off my chest, it’s accountability and an active effort to be a better person for my loved ones and my community.