. NOCTUA .

LYRICS

[VERSE]

Gamble to see what it means to be a living human Roll the dice, shake it twice, so boldly betting your life Where's the fun when you can predict the game? It all ends the same, deny that and you'll go insane

Looking for a cheap way out? Why don't you cheat your way out? You've got only one life left n' you won't have to play the rest Where's the fun when it's just to endure the pain? Get it through your brain, why stay a pawn living in vain?

[PRE CHORUS]

Hey, tell me if anything truly matters! You choose to live only just to die, that's the game of life So, don't blame me if that false hope shatters, It's your life, your problem, not mine if you choose to live a lie

It's starting to make sense to you, now isn't that right? We're all meaningless creatures with a drive to survive and die So, buckle up and get ready to enjoy this ride Of the meaningless desire for the meaning of life!

[CHORUS]

Oh, doesn't it hurt to lose No matter what you try to do (oh, doesn't it hurt) Don't you feel like a fool When you seek made-up truth (oh, it's all made up)

There's no target to beat Other than to accept defeat (oh, nothing to beat) So, please explain to me What else is there to believe? (and that's all how...)

This is the game of life, there's no doubt about it! (no doubt about that!) Live to see nothing matters, reality's a real lie (such a lie!) Philosophy's a joke, does it look like we're laughing? Keep on searching, gaming, playing for meaning in this stupid life!

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So, this song is pretty old. I made the original concept in 2022 when it was called "BAD LUCK" and had an entirely different meaning behind it. But, I revived it in 2024 and because I was facing a very horrible time due to an existential crisis, I wanted to write a song about my feelings towards life in general. That isn't the song's only meaning, but a pretty good generalization as to why I wrote it in the first place.

These are the original designs from 2024. I never had a color palette in mind when I made them, I just knew I wanted them to be bright as fuck and match. Soooo basically the new designs required me to come up with one off of the top of my head, but to also somewhat rework them. I think even the new ones might undergo some changes in the final release. I dunno. I'm a picky guy.

I had to learn a lot about audio engineering (in NO way am I a professional, hell nah) and Vocaloid 5 (I've been using V4 since 2021 so this is a very big change for me) to make this song, and even then I do have things I still wanna tweak about it. But so far so good! I love the way it sounds and I hope you do too!

My goal was to make them appear a little disturbing considering the topics of this song. I wanted them to look "so depressed they're insane", to an extent. "What about the bright colors?" I'll let you theorize about that :)

Also, I've never drawn vinyl before so it might look a little odd as I get used to drawing it 💔

I will post their individual concept drawings when I can, as there's some shit I need to do with them and I just can't really do it right now.

I hope you absolutely LOVED this and if you did, please reblog this to support my art. I would also greatly appreciate fan art! Just remember to tag me.

I'll likely get the finished song on YouTube and niconico soon but not Spotify considering the horrible shit they're involved with, nor SoundCloud. They're both evil AI supporting, art stealing corporations. Soooo yeah. At least with YT you can opt out. Same here on Tumblr. I would do Bandcamp but I don't want ppl to feel obligated to buy my music since I don't really want money for something that comes from my soul.

Anyways, have a great day and God bless ya 💕

Nana owns a daycare that's for preschool-aged children on up to the age of twelve. Older kids don't often need it, but with the existence of a place to leave your child after school while you work, it's an opportunity that shouldn't be wasted. Nana is renowned for being one of the best nannies in the village, doing things the "old fashioned" way and being very sweet and gentle with the young ones.

She's perfect to parents. From the moment the daycare opens to the moment the doors shutter, they see what Nana wants them to see.

But, when some careless parents get too trusting and decide to leave their older kids overnight — allowed by Nana and even encouraged, that's when the After Hours occur and Nana gets what she really wants.

Nana uses the blood of twelve-year-olds (often girls), soon to age out of her daycare, for the belief that the sacrifice of their blood will appease her false god. What she's looking for is pleasure, longevity, and luck. Luck to never get caught for her actions, longevity to live as long as possible to keep her worship going forever, and pleasure from a child's suffering.

And this drive only worsens when one day, parents drop off their young daughter, a rabbit named Hana. Nana could only wait for the moment she's old enough for her harvest, because nothing's luckier than a rabbit, especially a young, growing one. At this moment, Hana was only six-years-old, leaving her parents to decide that this is where she'd be going until she's aged out.

From sun up to sun down, the young Hana saw what Nana wanted her to see. She knows that young children tend to run their mouths and expose the truth of what an adult did to them, so it's easy to treat the child as if one were a true kind-hearted caretaker. It works, to say the least.

Hana's twelve now. Nana tells Hana's parents that she can stay for a month or two longer, that there's no rush, and this is when Hana soon discovers the truth. So blind and so innocent, crushed with the claws of Nana.

At night, Nana takes Hana downstairs, telling her to keep her voice down and that this is just a little game she enjoys to play with the older kids. Taking the "Nanny's Scissors" out of her dress's side pocket, Nana widens them and slowly drags them across Hana's wrist and neck, bringing her lips up to the wounds and sucking them, lapping up the blood that seeps. At first, Hana believes this is normal, because why would Nana hurt her, right? She's her caretaker.

But, after this happens over and over again, Hana being told to not tell her parents (and leading to Hana lying to them frequently about her injuries being from playground accidents), Hana realizes she can't tolerate this "game" anymore, yet still endures it because Nana made the threat that no matter what Hana does, she will always be bound to her and that she'll kill and eat her body if she tells.

I won't say much about this since it's quite triggering for some people, but Nana believes just the blood of a rabbit isn't enough to receive the epitome of her blessings, and decides to resort to... Well, S/A, consuming the blood from that too. This doesn't happen as often, but Nana did it purely from going insane for her "love" of Hana. (It isn't love in that sense, more like obsession.)

What will be shown in the MV during the final chorus is Hana snapping and grabbing the scissors from Nana, stabbing her to death in the throat and neck out of pure, unadulterated rage. That would be the only time Hana shows full anger, sick of all the pain that she's dealt with because of her abuser. And because Hana had never wanted to hurt anyone, being a sweet little girl, she falls to her knees and breaks down, even if the person she hurt was her abuser.

And that's the story for now.

===

Lyrics:

[VERSE I] Sun up to sun down, Mom and Dad see the veil Covered in bright pastels and a perfect woman ideal And since a little kit, I've been left here in her care Now old enough to be an unlucky victim of this nightmare

Too good to be true, predators never change You smile with your fangs and thirst with your eyes soon as you say my name Sacrificial prey's blood is what you really want And there's no better choice than your prized rabbit's for a blessing of luck

[PRE CHORUS] I'm taken down and ravished open Claws grip my neck leaving me choking You're lapping up the slit that's seeping And I'm not the first one you've broken

[CHORUS I] The seemingly perfect caretaker A predator of what it's collared "I'm quite lucky to have a girl like her Your daughter's just so well behaved and mannered!"

You'll act so the parents never know What happens here when those doors close

Learning what's going on behind the scenes A first-hand witness to these cruel schemes Feed from the wound from which I bleed Aren't you supposed to protect me?

Gnaw on the flesh of the young and fresh Now despoil what your prey has left

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The first verse is after the chorus in the audio because it's just a draft. I'm not even intending on keeping Teto in this and probably going to use Solaria's whisper VB in the final project. It's just difficult to get the vocals to sound like an actual kid.

I will have a separate post for Hana's character information as soon as I make her reference sheet, since this post was more so focused on Nana. Also, keep in mind this story is VERY new (just came up with it this week) so a LOT of changes will be made. This is what I have for now, and I'm really happy with it so far.

Lastly, this song is about grooming and power dynamic abuse. That's all I'll say for now.

it might be old but im kind of testing the waters to see if people still care abt my art because i kind of left social media due to the fact my art was seriously unpopular n shit. im sick of having to make only fan art or shit that is "popular", because if i dont, no one will gaf 😭 this drawing was made basically because of how demotivated i was for my passions, and i believed that being apathetic towards hobbies meant i wasnt "human" enough. that idea also came from the crystal castles song "transgender", because a misheard lyric sounded like this. thought it was pretty cool. thx for reading.