I know I said I was leaving but I wanted to post this first and say a couple of things.
When I came into this fandom I had no idea what I was getting into, I didn’t know I would end up making so many friends and have an OC that was genuinely appreciated in this fandom. I had posted a lot, made a lot of friends and really made leaps and bounds with improving my art. Hell I even did commissions! This year has been one of the best years ever for my art and I’m so grateful for every single moment and interaction with the people in this fandom 💗
That being said this year has also been the hardest year of my life. I lost my job, my relationship, my home, and even really close and treasured friends. During August I had a really hard time, it was the anniversary of my s*icide attempt as well as the month my friend had passed. I tend to get depressed so I withdrew from not only the fandom but my friends in hopes I would feel better but it didn’t go that way.
My mental health was only getting worse as the months progressed. September was the month I completely spiralled downwards. I was stressed out, said things I shouldn’t and completely ruined my living situation for myself and lost one of my best friends in a fight that shouldn’t have happened. I got news that my uncle has cancer, my grandfather was in hospital and that my aunt was sick and no one could figure out why all in the same week. I took to drinking and I got extremely wreckless.
Come October my aunts health began to rapidly decline, on the 10th my cousin who I love dearly was murdered and his funeral was held on the 16th. The day after my late grandfathers birthday as well as the day of my 23rd birthday. Having to bury my cousin on my birthday was the worst thing I have ever had to go through, and then just over a month later my aunt died. I was at a complete and total bottom in my life.
I eventually began to get help, I reached out to people, I started counselling as I ended up getting PTSD from the events I went through. I’m now on anxiety medications and I’m dating a really great guy. I’m getting a new job, trying to get a new place, and trying to figure out how to be okay again. I came back hoping to be able to talk to my friends again but sadly most of their blogs are gone, they’ve stopped posting and once again I feel like I’m alone. It no longer feels like home here and that’s truly regrettable. I’m not sure where anyone is anymore, but I hope if they one day read this they’ll understand that I never meant to ignore anyone.... I just couldn’t handle anything going on and I left without a word. I miss them all dearly and I hope they know that Fahie misses all of her friends as well.
If you read this all, thank you. This is just scratching the surface of this year, but it’s as much as I can comfortably talk about. Now, the Characters from left to right and who their creators are
Emrys (@theroyalmage)
Valor (@deathbyarcana)
Kitt (@theroyalmage)
Esperanza (@softclowninghours)
Fahie (mine)
Autum (@autumtheapprentice)
Skye (@deathbyarcana)
Hathe (@leatherandsaltybitters)
Vell (@deathbyarcana)
Rigel (@thearcanafanfan)
