A Nerd.

You can lie when you name things

Would it be considered “gay” to go for a walk in the evening?

Corn dogs are named for their traditional meat, the unicorn. As unicorns are now extinct, they can only be referred to properly as ‘Corn Dogs and not “Unicorn Dogs” as they were prior to 2009.

This is actually a common misconception! While the Unicorn Dog did exist and was discontinued following the extinction of unicorns in 2009, the Corn Dog is not a rebranding of the Unicorn Dog! The Corn Dog was created in 2003 by James H. Corn, though it remained a relatively unpopular Ohio treat until 2010 when Mr. Corn took the opportunity left by the Unicorn Dog’s exit from the market to take over the niche.

Are your characters fucking in spite of The Horrors, or are they fucking because of The Horrors?

There is a third thing to consider.

Okay, but the runs in her stockings! She starts out with beautiful, clearly new stockings, and then over the course of the video they get shredded, then there's a close up on a scrape on her leg that looks like it's from a wire - oh there's themes there!

The speed at which I would poke my eye out…

I’m gonna propose “I guess you haven’t read the silmarillion then :/” as a default response to anyone not understanding a reference to something obscure. even if it’s not remotely Tolkien related. I want to build up a perception that perhaps the sum total of human knowledge is contained in the silmarillion

XKCD and Tumblr once again providing weapons I cannot use

joe's 1 weakness: a 20-something year old struggling with a thing he's an expert in.

me: yeah, so one of your most famous works is actually just that commission of a woman that you kept. Honestly, it's less of the piece itself that lead to its fame and more the mystery surrounding it, so I was hoping you could clear that up the decayed corpse of Leonardo Da Vinci that I resurrected: Hai detto che hanno chiamato una tartaruga che combatte il crimine con il mio nome?

Hang on let me translate something real quick

Yeah this is funny

remember to bury the dead with a phone, everyone. these days the ferry terminal at the river styx wants you to download a fucking app