Nez's Creations

So, let me guess– you just started a new book, right? And you’re stumped. You have no idea how much an AK47 goes for nowadays. I get ya, cousin. Tough world we live in. A writer’s gotta know, but them NSA hounds are after ya 24/7. I know, cousin, I know. If there was only a way to find out all of this rather edgy information without getting yourself in trouble…

You’re in luck, cousin. I have just the thing for ya.

It’s called Havocscope. It’s got information and prices for all sorts of edgy information. Ever wondered how much cocaine costs by the gram, or how much a kidney sells for, or (worst of all) how much it costs to hire an assassin?

I got your back, cousin. Just head over to Havocscope.

((PS: In case you’re wondering, Havocscope is a database full of information regarding the criminal underworld. The information you will find there has been taken from newspapers and police reports. It’s perfectly legal, no need to worry about the NSA hounds, cousin ;p))

“Below are selected prices that are paid to professional assassins by criminal organizations and drug cartels for a contract hit.

In Australia, the median price to hire a hit man is $13,610 (9,800 Euros), with the price going up to $83,000 (60,000 Euros) based on the task.

In Mexico, the cost for a low level assassin is $208 (150 Euros), and up to $20,832 (15,000 Euros) for a higher profile target like a police chief.

The prices paid in Argentina are between $3,749 (2,700 Euros) to $5,555 (4,000 Euros) per hit.

Government statistics in Spain state that 40 assassinations take place each year, with prices for the hit ranging between $27 (20 Euros) to $69,000 (50,000 Euros).”

This movie FUCKED ME UP as a kid. It’s like “oh cute owl movie with cartoon owls and pretty animation” and then you watch it and it’s like “all of the main characters are child kidnapping victims of an evil cannibal nazi owl cult bent on racial supremacy known as The Pure Ones that regularly kidnaps and brainwashes child owls to work for them and/or holds other owls family’s hostage to enlist them in the evil cults plan to take over the owl world. The plot is for a few of these child kidnapping owlet’s to go find a big ole tree full of legendary owls that will go to war with the owl cult. Also the main emotional storyline is that the main owlet’s brother is successfully indoctrinated into the cult before he can escape and has to face off against his own brother who can’t turn him to the side of good so he’s forced to set him on fire instead” like WHAT THE FUCK?? WHAT THE FUCK!!!!

I cannot fucking stress how terrifying this movie was for me when I was a child. This is not a fucking kids movie, do not show it to your children for the love of god. Like these are the bad guys

Wondering if the old man was His father Joseph, Jesus asked him, “Did you, by any chance, ever have a son?”

“Yes,” said the old man, “but he wasn’t my biological son. He was born by a miracle, by the intervention of a magical being from the heavens.”

“Very interesting,” said Jesus. “Did this boy ever have to fight temptation?”

“Oh, yes, many times,” answered the old man. “But he eventually won. Unfortunately, he heroically died at one point, but he came back to life shortly afterwards.”

Jesus couldn’t believe it. Could this actually be His father?

“One last question,” He said. “Were you a carpenter?”

“Why yes,” replied the old man. “Yes I was.”

Jesus rubbed His eyes and said, “Dad?”

AIGHT. so I've been meaning to post this for a while cough cough uh I've got another version I'mma actually do more than just a sketch for but this is from TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN by @neko-nez I fricking love it and I can't wait for more! Keep at it you're amazing! <3 I really recommend it for anyone that likes angst✨

bunch of baby shroos biting each other’s butts so they don’t loose track of mom

Piss