Healthy eating is so annoying. I want cheese but I DO have clearer skin when I cut it out. I’m tired of carrying a giant water bottle and peeing all the time but I DO feel less hungry because I’m hydrated. Burgers and steak and salami are incredible but I DO feel less lethargic in the morning when I don’t have them. I hate that it works!!! (On principle of course, love that I’m getting results)

After my dad died last year I’ve had a really hard time finding the motivation to continue projects I had been working on, or starting new ones— especially when alone. I find myself wasting time either watching tv or on my phone, especially when avoiding tasks that need to be done related to my dad’s affairs. In 2019 I have to actively push myself to pursue the things on my to-do list - reading, improving my russian language, listening to podcasts, learning new pieces on the piano, and working out. No real resolutions, except to get through at least some of the things on that list. Grad school starts in a few weeks and I’m not looking forward to the work, but I am looking forward to the chance to be excited about something again.