Kind and Dangerous

the really crazy thing about cooking is that once you practice it enough (for all the gamers reading this: "grind enough exp") your threshold for wuat counts as a low effort / depression / I Dont Really Want To Cook meal rises steadily and you can feel yourself becoming the kind of person whose "chill dinner" takes 1h45 and involves three pans

ok but how do I get there from "assembling a sandwich is too much work"

this is so helpful. too many times when I ask how to do something, people tell me to "just do it" like I'm supposed to already know what steps to take. and I almost never know what steps to take. someone actually telling me is so refreshing

My advice for getting from "sandwich too hard" to "can actually cook, somehow" is to get a rice cooker, start messing around with what liquid you cook the rice in, start adding stuff to the rice while it cooks or after it cooks, see where you end up. This can also like silverjirachi said be very gradual, one thing at a time. I make rice and eat it with butter. Eventually I make rice with chicken broth, and eat it with butter. I start adding canned chicken. I start adding poultry seasoning. I start adding dehydrated chopped onion. I start cutting up a little fresh onion. Sometimes I throw an egg in there now. I have a couple other rice cooker recipes of similar complexity. I still don't really use perishable ingredients except sometimes onion, because my executive function isn't that reliable.

Somehow never occurred to me I can use my rice cooker to cook things WITH the rice. So cool!!

If I may, an instant pot can do rice, slow cooker meals, and do its own things too. Slow cooker meals were my gateway into being a better cook. You dump everything in and let it cook all day and then come home to a cooked meal. Or, if you're using an instant pot, you're browning your meat in there (if you feel like it, not necessary, but will make everything taste better) and then you're dumping most stuff in to pressure cook and adding stuff that can't handle that at the end. Sheet pan meals are also extremely good starting points as they are mostly, cut a bunch of stuff up, slather that stuff in olive and seasonings and bake it. The nice thing about the stuff listed here as well as that they don't require a huge amount of dishes to get dirtied up either.

That's just what spring is like in the midwest

ohhhh shit. target is recalling their up & up baby wipes (fragrance free & fresh cucumber scented) because they're contaminated with Burkholderia cepacia complex and Burkholderia gladioli, multiple people are reporting discoloration & infections. i just got a call about it cuz i had purchased those but i've already gone through them 😅 so no refund for me. but im fine. if you have these they're saying you need to immediately stop using them and bring them back to target for a full refund. this bacteria can cause life threatening infections in children/infants and people with compromises immune systems (ESPECIALLY cystic fibrosis!!) and i know lots of other chronically ill people follow me!!!!

If you use baby wipes go check them NOW. A lot of Burkholderia bugs are antibiotic resistant so infections can be really difficult to treat.

i'm generally pro drug freedom but it does really bother me that kratom is so widely sold all over the place now while at the same time flying under the radar so nobody really warns you about quite how bad it is or how much it can fuck you up and there aren't significant enough warnings on the packaging about how addictive it is. by the time i ended up in the hospital i was in such intensely bad withdrawal they said it rivaled fentanyl and that's what they'd have guessed i was on if they didn't know. i was in the emergency room for days. i was diagnosed with incredibly severe opioid use disorder and given a pretty aggressive dose of buprenorphine that i'm still on 10 months later like its Bad. it turns out kratom isn't just "like an opioid" it actually triggers your brain the same exact way and exhausts the same receptors and you WILL give yourself OUD if you aren't really fucking careful with it. don't start taking it as an opioid alternative, i promise it's not a good alternative. by the end of my addiction i was spending hundreds of dollars (that i didn't have! that could've been rent!) a WEEK on it, and i hadn't been high in months. i almost died. it's just not worth it. if you're gonna do it please please be safe and watch for the signs.

People on Tumblr love sharing information about themselves no matter how asinine it is. And I'm the same way. Everybody tell me what the last thing you drank was.

somnophillia is super funny like im honk shoo honk shoo having a good nights sleep and now you must pass the ultimate test of fucking me without waking me by knocking something over or stepping on a crisp packet i've left on my floor. can you finish your mission while my pet geckos judge you from their tanks? because they're not leaving the room okay the geckos stay in here. also the markiplier fnaf playlist stays on. i sleep better when he's screaming.

all kink stuff is playing pretend but with somno you're not playing pretend you're locked in you're comfy cozy you're snug as a bug in a rug and your partner is playing pretend instead

and like. if you're the one awake you're playing pretend so hard right now like ouuuuhhh look at me i'm a scary evil intruder or a demon or vampire or whatever we're doing tonight and now i just have to uhhhh okay shimmy the duvet off and shhh dontfucking breathe so loud and okayyyyy alright now. ah shit they're sleeping in the family guy death pose how the fuck do i get in there how. how do i. help. why are these geckos looking at me.

plus you have to not get too scared when freddy fazbear jumpscares you or else you're waking them up with your screams

oh great and this guy's here in the cuck box wondering if the screaming is me waking up or markiplier dying or toy bonnie throwing a tantrum

It deeply saddens me that "pdf file" has become slang for pedo. Don't you dare disrespect my wife the beautiful portable document format ever again

and to the children in the notes saying we need this fucking baby talk to get around censorship online; there's been no credible evidence that any site other that YouTube (which will only demonetize your video, ftr) will actually censor or hide content that include words like rape, pedophile, gun, terrorist, etc. etc. and even if we take as a given they were (which, again, they are not), do not fucking comply in advance, you absolute fucking coward. and ESPECIALLY do not comply by altering your real life fucking vocabulary. don't let the technocrats dictate what words you say holy fucking shit dude!!!!!!!!!!!!