In Accordance to the Moon

idk what yall are mad about the new Lies Your Older Cousin Tells You machine is working great

pro tip if you start saying hewwo as a joke it will eventually come to be your standard greeting for all loved ones 

Or, in a more generalized form, beware what thou do ironically, lest thou begin to do it ronically.

#beware of the running joke#because someday it will catch you

I still think using words like “ronically” and “whelmed” has been the most lasting effect of this on my psyche. Why yes, I am a person from 1506, in a trench coat hoping nobody catches on

i say this to myself like, once a day. out loud. its just part of me now.

i tried to tell my boyfriend he looked hot by saying 'watch out hes a ladykiller' and he got sad voice made a frownie face and said 'i dont do that i dont kill ladies'

im dating a 25 year old real life man

[Video description: A compilation of clips from Star Trek: The Next Generation showing the instances in which Picard pulled his shirt. It is edited so that every time he pulls his shirt, his badge flies off of his uniform with a 'pop' sound. End description]

It’s a cold and it’s a broken jalapeño

can't believe that pompeii by bastille is over ten years old now. but I guess if you close your eyes it does almost feels like nothing changed at all