Under the circumstances i will not be thank u

What even happens in the pacific ocean

that poll going around of the guy who thought "people only eat tofu as a bit because they're deranged vegans" or whatever really crystalizes something that i have never been able to precisely say - which is "a nonzero fraction of people who start picky-eater discourse just happen to precisely hate those foods which are not from north america and refuse to introspect on this whatsoever"

In contrast some people say "there aren't any picky eaters in Asia 🙄" but this is laughably untrue. I have a cousin in India who refused until his 20s to eat anything in a sauce. as you can imagine in India this was difficult. he basically had to pick things out of curry and wipe them dry

i suggest having fun with it

tbh I’ve always found it very funny that Elrond is like “there’s no point bringing Glorfindel on the quest, even though he’s a balrog-slayer. You won’t need balrog-slayers” and then thirty pages later they run into a balrog

#anyways it’s common knowledge in the shire that dwarves are actually just a kind of mushroom#but no one says anything#because they think (seeing as how the dwarves haven’t brought it up themselves) it would be rude (via @willowcrowned)

Rich people are literally just lying about being good at money btw

Things like overdraft fees, late fees, parking tickets, fines, subscription renewals, legal fees, penalty fees, sales and discounts, lawsuits - these are things that all cease to matter in any material way once you have enough money

To Jeff Bezos, a parking meter, a plane ticket, and a private jet all effectively cost the same amount of money: none

I am a glorified office administrator who understands server hardware why am I the only person in this company who gets what social engineering is?

“Social engineering” is a way too fancy word for what it is. I know a guy (not personally) who broke several people out of prison by essentially writing “Greetings, please release this person, signed, whoever the judge is” on a piece of paper and faxing it there. Because no one would have a fax machine in their own house I guess.

not to derail, but holy shit that praxis

I’ve had clerks just give out a whole ass SSN when I asked.

An inspection in 2014 found the password for the Louvre’s surveillance camera system was “louvre.”

"there's no platonic explanation for this" some of y'all need better friends

"there's no platonic explanation for this" some of y'all need to be better friends

(voice of a person spiralling) its embarrassing but i still havent figured out if its ok for me to be alive

apparently the finance team question of the week this week is 'would you rather fight 25 squirrels or 1 kangaroo' and im like well do i get to specify which kangaroo

tho i suppose the issue with fighting the musky rat-kangaroo is the emotional cost... yes this thing only weighs 500 grams and i could probably kick the shit out of it... but the remorse... the remorse :(

i would like to add to this that our manager responded that he would take the squirrels because he's 'done it before' and when pressed said they 'hunt in packs like velociraptors'.