first dance is always free

Really now? And here I was, hoping you’d turn into a mountain troll as soon as you work your way into the forty lane. Have you seen them? Awfully cute and charming, they can kidnap me any day. Hm… give me a few reasons as to why I should put my lips on yours?

“Ah, hope all you want, but I won’t be the one turning into a troll, though I’d still be cute and charming. They’re too big to be seen in public, they won’t kidnap you. They’ll get Tony to do it, gnomes are trolls’ distant cousins. Well, because they’re my lips, do you need any more reasons than that? 

“Well the good new is that the network DIDN’T decide on kicking me out, the bad news is that none of you are allowed to stare at that channel between 6 p.m and 7 p.m. I mean, unless you too want to join in on the singing circle with me and my new best friend Vicky.” 

“Dude, no way I’m gonna miss out on that. I can ell you now that I’ll definitely be tuning in, and sing along. That’s what good friends are for. Also how dare this Vicky person take my spot, I need to at least tune in for the competition. But hey, did you get a haircut or something? You look a bit different.”

Make it 45 and we’re talking. 45 is the perfect middle age of still loooking fine as hell and moving into the bad years. Mhm, do I now? Not too sure, you’re not very convincing, young man.

Alright, 45 it is! That’s true though, after 45 things definitely get bad. Bones start creaking, signs of aging and just generally bad bad things. But I’ll probably still look just as good. No? Well then, how can I be more convincing?

The stubble makes you look more rugged but in a slightly more high fashion way. Just look at Marlon Teixeira, it will be the next trend in no time, although I stubble has never been out of fashion. Silver and grey hair was one of the biggest trends last year. I can’t say it made me too excited to become an elderly lady. Have you had any time off? Children are so adorable, but it must be tiring.

High fashion ruggedness? I like the sound of that. Alright, I’m gonna try growing it out one more time. I don’t know who the Marlon guy is, but from his name he sounds like a good looking guy. True, stubble hasn’t but I’ll grow it out. I like changes. But, if this change is looking a little on the, hairy big foot homeless man side, I might just rid my face of all facial hair. Oh right, well that makes sense. No, I bet it wouldn’t, but find comfort in the fact that you, can definitely pull of the granny look, when the time comes. Yeah, Christmas period is usually very slow, even the rich kids mothers pull them out for family bonding. Ain’t that the truth, the hardest part to get and keep them silent.

I’m no expert but I don’t think a kid should be getting a notebook with ‘People I want to punch in the face’ written on the cover. Hey, these women need to learn. It’s like when old people push in front of me in line. Most of the time I don’t care but when four people do it in a day when they clearly see me standing there it’s a little annoying. I get that they’re closer to death but the Grim Reaper’s not going to come knocking within the two minutes it’ll take for me to be served.

True, kids are already too violent these days. Who did you get that book for anyway? You should tell them the story of how you got it. I don’t even like it when one does, on any day. But yes, patience does run out if shit happens a lot. They’d wish for the Grim Reaper if you run out of patience, you’re a lot scarier. Would you win against the elderly, Brooke?

Are you trying to tell me I’m old and ugly? I know someone who won’t get a New Years kiss this year. 

Awh come on now, you look lovely and not a day over 50. If that someone is me, you are mistaken. You wanna kiss this face.

“Who knows maybe that could be your part time job; I still see you working in Dancing with the Stars.You are welcome, Nate! We could do it at my new place, its bigger and has a lot of space. I haven’t seen you guys in a long time; so it would be nice to see everybody in the same room catching up. Oh dear; where do I begin. I’m been staying most of my time in Manhattan since its closer to Julliard; also i’m been taking care of my little sister and now I have another one in the way; I also was an intern and I was teaching kids and  at the same time I’m in charge on doing this years showcase. What about you? ”

“I wish I was working on that show, dancing and on TV what more could I ask for. I’m kidding I can ask for a lot more, but fingers crossed getting on that show would be a start. I love the sound of that! Your place it is! Another sister! Aww you’re gonna be great, you already are! Oh Sasha, look at you doing so many wonderful things! I couldn’t be more prouder, told you you were talented. You have to invite me to see your showcase, you must! Well, compared to you my life has been very and I say very less hectic. I’ve been trying to expand from teaching kids to actually choreographing for a couple of local dance crews, and that’s about it really. Nothing super exciting, unfortunately.”

“You sounds like one of does promoters who try to sale tickets for the Broadway musicals bu I do agree, we should do something for New Years. Need help planning a small get together?

“I very well could be. That’s my next career, selling tickets to shows, I’ll be so great. Yes! Thank you! It’s been ages since I saw everyone together, you’re the best Sash. And speaking of not seeing people, where and how have you been? It’s been a while.”

Life always seems to become extra busy when you least expect it. I don’t think I could pull off a beard, maybe a little scruff but not a beard. I did have to wear a white wig for a shoot the other day which actually felt pretty cool. It was like I was modelling grandma couture. I haven’t been up to anything besides work, travelling and travelling for work. What’s been happening in your life?

Ain’t that the truth, I think that’s especially around the holidays, where everyone’s running around finishing up things, it can be crazy hectic. I tried growing a beard once, got called a homeless person, so never again, just gotta keep it to a light stubble. Grandma couture? Oh wow, this is the first time I’m hearing that but damn I’m very interested. Can I see the outtakes, if you have them? At least you’ve been travelling? I’ve just been working, kids are a handful.

It was actually pretty beautiful. It was like a form of vigilante justice. Middle aged women have got to learn, Nate. The laws of the universe made me do it.

You say beautiful, I say some kid lost their present to you. But, since it was a middle aged woman, I say right on! I know how they can be. Forget Batman, you’re the true hero.

“Now I’m not saying that I may have nicked a present from a woman’s basket while she was shopping but if I did it was only because she stole it from me first. Bitches gots to learn.” 

Did you actually? Brooke, that’s absolutely terrible!