normal abt repressed characters

i think……..one of the many problems in how sex is perceived in society is that we seem to think its this isolated “skill” like people are very anxious about getting experience or practice or whatever wrt sex but that’s not really how it works, it’s fundamentally an expression, a conversation; two-sided, subjective, situational, and figuring out what works for everyone involved, as opposed to being just another objective talent to master for all situations as if its one-size-fits-all without consideration to your specific partner

ok wait @natalie-goodmn i got sidetracked im on a vampire au now. vampirism as a metaphor for their violent impulses. adrian who loves being a vampire and drains criminals so its two birds one stone to him + he loves hunting and sees it almost as a game. chris who used to kill for fun with him but now can't handle the guilt and is trying not to feed on humans anymore. emilia who sees it as a purely practical thing and something that makes her better at her job but if she can't canalize it into work she's just draining people aimlessly and starts falling apart about it not being something useful anymore

ok wait @natalie-goodmn i got sidetracked im on a vampire au now. vampirism as a metaphor for their violent impulses. adrian who loves being a vampire and drains criminals so its two birds one stone to him + he loves hunting and sees it almost as a game. chris who used to kill for fun with him but now can't handle the guilt and is trying not to feed on humans anymore. emilia who sees it as a purely practical thing and something that makes her better at her job but if she can't canalize it into work she's just draining people aimlessly and starts falling apart about it not being something useful anymore

ok wait @natalie-goodmn i got sidetracked im on a vampire au now. vampirism as a metaphor for their violent impulses. adrian who loves being a vampire and drains criminals so its two birds one stone to him + he loves hunting and sees it almost as a game. chris who used to kill for fun with him but now can't handle the guilt and is trying not to feed on humans anymore. emilia who sees it as a purely practical thing and something that makes her better at her job but if she can't canalize it into work she's just draining people aimlessly and starts falling apart about it not being something useful anymore

its obviously much more complicated than that but sometimes you do have to look at the way emilias all like Im Not Right For Him Im Bad And Emotionally Repressed And Belong To An Evil World Of Violence So I'll Push Him Away About It and then chris metaphorically kills himself about it. and she eventually admits that no she does love him actually she's just bad at expressing feelings and then they're together and everything is magically fixed. and go oh so this is twilight and chris is bella

I looooove that Emilia’s fighting skills are first introduced as her easily beating up misogynistic men, and it’s what makes Chris falls in love with her. Because it’s the exact trope of every single female character in a superhero movie (like 5-10 years ago) where they’re so small and dainty but they easily take down men to show how cool and and badass and sexy they are. And then in season 2 it’s turned on its head and you go ohhhhhh right that was self harm. Awesome.

AND it also parallels how Chris is introduced as the typical super macho killing machine, before turning that on its head too and showing how it’s a product of abuse & self harm. Basically what I’m saying is their gender stuff #theirgenderstuff

i enjoy the miserable girl character.

staring at the dessert menu and twirling my hair and going "should I be baaaaddd" until the autistic girl I'm eating with says "there is nothing bad about eating dessert. it is a morally neutral action"