baby i can avoid eye contact in ways you’d never fuckin believe

Americans be like: My grandpa 😠😠😠 served in the Korean War 😠😠😠 and killed 9 people 😠😠😠 to fund his college degree in clownery 😠😠😠 Respect him or leave the country 😡😡😡🤬🤬🤬

That’s a super light story huh? My great grandfather got killed in action from a land mine to protect this country. If you don’t wanna respect the history or stand for a national anthem😁then leave to your peaceful home and fuck right off

How did your great grandpa stepping on a landmine protect this country

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Of course it goes without saying I am hopelessly dependent on the mysterious handy tool for unusual home adventures with a twist

fuck i love not being a mother

it takes great bravery to spend my life on shit no one cares about but i do it. i do it

if you want pluto to be a planet so bad get out there and fuck it with your penis so it gets big and pregnant. otherwise don't talk to me about it

Into the great wild yonder?

go in the great wild yonder

God forbid women do anything

day barely even started and I already had to hear "thank you for being our wives, sisters, aunts" and "keep being women and giving birth and being delicate unlike us men" as compliments for international women's day

here's to women being transgender childless dykes forever and ever and ever