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As a true amateur blogger, I go through phases with my blog. I love it dearly, but I tend to over-invest for a while, put way too much pressure on myself (did someone say perfectionist?) and then drop it completely again. After almost 8 years, it has come to a point where I have trouble even starting because of previous expectations I have had for myself.

Despite all that, though, this little…

You might change your mind, you can, and you will. Here are some of my tips on dealing with coming back on a decision.

We’ve all heard it, we’ve all said it… “you can/might/will change your mind”. Yet, as stupid as I’m aware this will sound: I never thought I would be doing it. There are a few things I have had to learn about the different varieties of ‘changing your mind’: maybe they will be helpful for you as well.

Can

It can be difficult to give in, even if it’s mostly to yourself (no? just me? okay.) But…

First of all: what? Second of all: what? Don’t get me wrong, I think the love for your friends deserves to be celebrated, and being single is no reason to go wallow in self-pity all alone, but it seems to me that commercializing ‘Galentine’s’ is almost more capitalist than the concept of Valentine’s Day itself. Why is it that we absolutely must celebrate something today? Why is it so important that we all have some kind of feeling about it – and lastly, why does all include only women? Where are the pink advertisements and blog posts about bro-dates on February 14th? If we’re going to celebrate friendship and potentially spend tonnes on the decoration and gifts that come with that, I say we all join the fun.

As many have said before, and hopefully many will continue to see: I don’t need one particular day to show my love and appreciation. If I love and appreciate you on any day, I will let you know. Who wants to consistently wait months for the next opportunity to show someone you love them? Why not make it a habit to let people know how you feel about them, whenever there is a chance?

If you want to treat yourself to chocolate today, by all means, go ahead. If you want to use this ‘special’ day as an excuse to hang out with your friends and watch soppy movies, or gory ones, you do you! Who am I to deprive you of what brings you joy. But I just hope you know there is nothing wrong with being alone; you don’t need to have a Valentine’s or a Galentine’s date; you. are. fine. There is rarely an experience in life that is not worth having, and being by yourself is an amazing place to learn and grow from, as is being with someone (or multiple someones) you love.

We can stop to smell the flowers any day. 

There is so much joy and beauty in the world, people are not the only ones you can love… please don’t get stuck on this idea of perfect, beautiful, romantic love. There is so much more to life.

  Reflecting in Ao Nang

Reflecting along Great Ocean Road

I have always been careful about sharing my creative expressions with others, because they are personal and thus vulnerable to me. Still, every once in a while, someone who did know about my blog and channel would ask how it was going, and if i’d stopped writing and filming. I would just shrug, saying I didn’t have the time, or that I was taking a deliberate break. And some days, I was. But those some days being all days was definitely not voluntary: it stemmed from an uncertainty on how to progress.

  Reflecting in Maas, fall 2017

Reflecting in Maas, spring 2018

Then today (just now, actually), I plugged in my external hard-drive. My hard-drive, filled with memories of the past few years, the years that shaped me more than anything. (Okay, I can see that that’s probably not technically true, but as far as conscious growing goes, I did a lot of it from the moment I left high school.) Anyhow, I opened the harddrive, and I saw what I had been missing, and why I was doing what I was doing before. I saw a radiant, happy, bright young girl, young woman, whatever one calls oneself when they look back two years in the past. Point is, it made me realize I don’t want to deprive myself of those reflections, and the ability to look back on them later on.

I also don’t want to limit my public expression. I care way too much about what others think of me, and I have also been stuck on wanting to know so much more before I put myself and my views out there, thinking I needed to have the answers in order to have any value to add. I don’t know much more now than I did before – but I have found that maybe not knowing, and just sharing the small stuff is good enough. People are allowed to make mistakes, it’s how we learn – and there is a reason we watch videos, even if it’s completely uneventful vlogs. We connect to the personality behind them, the character we see. And even if I know nothing (which, let’s face it, I do), that can be worth something. So I want to try (again).

Reflecting in Maas, winter 18-19

As Instagram and Facebook keep graciously reminding me, it has now been exactly two years since my first big solo trip. At the time, I had my traditional trouble following through, which has left me with a lot of unused footage from the majority of my travels. I want to do something with that material. My plan is to edit what can or should be edited, and use this opportunity to try out some different things: maybe I will post some clips with some voice-over recollections, maybe I will just post a video the way it was originally intended… maybe I will do a response, like I did with my 16-to-18 video. You will have to wait and find out!

This whole time, my fingers have been flying over my keyboard. I’m ready. I hope you are.

Love, Ruby

p.s. Despite appearances, no reflective Rubys were harmed in the making of this post.

I have a certain (set of) images in my head of what a beautiful life/person/version of me looks like. A lot of the time, these images, the aesthetic that I’m going for, inform my actions. Every so often, an instagrammer shares a post announcing they will be taking time off social media: a social media detox. It seems to be implied everywhere that social media are doing more harm than good in our…

Here's some of my best tips on finding the perfect hostel for your next trip!

To start off, I should disclose something: I don’t think the perfect hostel exists. Hostels are budget places to crash, and ultimately you get what you pay for – they’re not luxury hotels. That said, I don’t think differences in price necessarily tell all when it comes to the quality of a hostel. I have stayed at hostels that seemed too good to be true – cheap, central and with great facilities –…

After getting back to the western world and spending a few days in Sydney, a city I had high hopes for that it didn’t always meet, I was quite ready to get back into nature. A colleague had recommended that I should go to the Blue Mountains – so on a Tuesday morning I checked out of my hostel, got on a train and left for Katoomba. Katoomba, one of the villages of the Blue Mountains and home to…

I’ve done it. I’m that person now: that person who goes to the movies alone. Big whoop, some might say, but even if it does not deserve the credit of an accomplishment, I’m still glad I did and am doing it. Now that I’ve crossed into this territory, a whole new world has opened up to me: I can go to the movies all. the damn. time now. I’m even considering getting a membership at the cinema (of…

After sitting on a flight for a good few hours squashed between two guys, one of which snoring and taking up the entire armrest, not really getting in any quality sleep, we touch down in Australia. I change out of my tropical clothes and brush my teeth in the airport bathroom, go through the usual customs hustle & bustle and then I’m officially here: Sydney. From the airport, there’s an expensive…

Travel Diary: Bangkok, Pt. II

On the back of a scooter, with my bag between a stranger’s legs, I drive to Krabi Airport. Although I had a wonderful time in the North and South of Thailand, I’m glad to be going back to Bangkok. It almost feels like coming home.  Whenever I come back to a place I’ve visited before, it’s almost always better. Instead of focusing on seeing all the sights (which, to be honest, I didn’t do to begin…

After unwinding on the beautiful beaches of Ko Phi-Phi, it was time to take the ferry once again, towards my last new destination in Thailand: Krabi. After getting of the ferry and striking what may very well have been the smartest deal of my entire trip (getting an entire minivan to myself for 50 baht, as opposed to getting a cab for 300), I got to my hostel. When I first arrived, I wasn’t sure…

Travel Diary: Ko Phi Phi.

After the rollercoaster of boring Phuket, peaceful Khao Sok and trashy Patong, I was not sure what my next stop would hold in store for me. A place known for both partying and beautiful, beautiful beaches: Ko Phi Phi. Upon arrival on the island, everyone has to pay a 30 baht “ticket” for entrance – this is supposed to cover the costs of keeping this stunning place clear of your trash. A great…

Another week, another travel diary! This week: KHAO SOK.

In between the emptiness of Phuket Town and the hustle and bustle of Patong Beach, I managed to escape to my go-to favourite: nature. Cities you have to vibe with, but nature never disappoints, at least in my experience. And so it was here: in Khao Sok. Khao Sok National Park is listed on the Lonely Planet’s “Ultimate Travelist: the 500 best places to visit on the planet”. I wouldn’t be able to…

People, or at least the ones I met or read from, always say that the North and the South of Thailand are very different. Let me be the one to tell you: this is absolutely true. You will find that people traveling to the South often have completely different purposes for their trips than the people discovering the North do. Where in the North it’s all about culture, heritage and spirituality, the South runs at an entirely different pace, varying a bit depending on location. I visited two places in the South that, despite their small relative distance, could not be more dissimilar: Phuket Town and Patong Beach.

When I first arrived in Phuket, I had a place booked in Phuket Town. To be honest, I hadn’t even considered the fact that just because it was the main town and name-holder of the province, it might not be the most exciting place: I just assumed the main attraction of Phuket was Phuket Town. It wasn’t.

Phuket Town, from what I experienced, was devoid of purpose. While in some places it felt busy, it did not feel like anyone was doing anything, really. A lot of streets were simply empty, the malls – the easiest way to compare cities at this point – looked messy and sad. It was an absolutely beautiful town, with greens and flowers everywhere, but (at least for me) it had nothing going on. The one place I did like, was the Night Market on the weekend. While it was nothing you wouldn’t have found at the Night Bazaar in Chiang Mai just as easily, it had life. It was like all the people that had been hiding in their holes the entire day had crept out and found their way to this place together. Although not necessarily the easiest to find in the extensive food area, there was some delicious and filling vegan food available, and overall it was the one place I walked away from with a smile on my face.

After spending a few days in Khao Sok (which you’ll be able to read about next week!), I went over to the other side of the island, to the most popular of the beaches: Patong. Although the contrast with Phuket Town could not have been bigger, this did not make the place any better. Where the streets of Phuket were mostly devoid of life or meaning, the streets of Patong were filled with desperation and loud music. Sex tourism is big here, and personal boundaries are supposed to be left at the wayside somewhere along the way from Phuket Bus Terminal to Jungceylon (you guessed it – a huge shopping mall). While all this did mean a much wider availability of virtually everything – I had a baguette with peanut butter while here – this comes at the cost of any hope for privacy or silence, which makes you appreciate the emptiness of Phuket Town.

The one thing I absolutely loved in Patong was my hostel. It was my first hostel of this trip (don’t ask why, I’ll cover it someday), and the people were amazing. It was small, and I stayed in a room of six. I sat down in the reception area where they had wifi, and before I knew it a sweet old lady and two Philippine girls were talking to me and sharing watermelon with me. We went out to a bar off Bangla road, the Khao San of Patong, where the rats were running rampant, but the music was live and nice, and I had a great time. This was the absolute highlight of my time there, and for that I’m still glad I went, although I don’t think I will ever go here again. But I guess the lesson is that it can’t be all fun when you’re traveling to new places, that’s just part of the deal!

Have you ever been disappointed by a travel destination?

Love, Ruby

Travel Diary: Chiang Rai.

There are two things you should know about me: as a traveller, I prefer to mix in with the locals (for as far as that is possible – I do not look thai at all), and I always try and often succeed to find the positive side of any situation. These two features of mine experienced their glory days in Chiang Rai: the best way to describe this town, other than “Heaven of the North” as some apparently…

Travel Diary: Chiang Mai

After a few days in Bangkok, you’re ready to leave. So, as an unexperienced backpacker and traveller all-round, what do you do? Simple: you get on the night train to Chiang Mai! When you’re in Thailand for the first time, there are a few things that could be considered must-do’s. One of them is taking an overnight train to the north of Thailand – Chiang Mai in particular. It’s cheap, it’s scenic;…

It’s the second of February 2017; I get on a plane. A plane that will take me to new, faraway places, further than I’ve ever been before. After about 13 hours of travel, I land. Welcome to Bangkok! So yes, it’s been almost three weeks since that day. Since then, I’ve discovered an additional 7 places and taken well over 400 photos and video clips. If you’re subscribed to my Youtube channel, you…