Peter Solarz

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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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@mybullshitbrowsing

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got a crick in my neck and a frog in my throat and a chip on my shoulder and a stick up my ass and now you're gonna stand there puttin words in my mouth? haven't I been through enough?
I think instrumence should be free for those who are pure of heart
u should be able to put ur hand down and let the instrument sniff u and if it smells a beautiful quality in ur heart and spirit that's ur instrument now. stray tumpet follow you home.. bwaa
Sniff my hand, sweet bwa bwaa.... You will be safe with me
fuck it really has like almost the exact cadence

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I wish I could have heard you sing this… I bet you have a beautiful voice
"Diversity of opinion" but the opinions are "We should use a chainsaw to rescue a cat from a tree" and "We should trap more cats on the tree and then set it on fire"
To clarify: If those are your only options (and they often are) it's your moral imperative to choose the chainsaw.
Fuck this rhetoric. You are not obligated to choose the chainsaw. Go create a better solution.
#mybloodchainsaw
Mommy's going to take you out of the freezer and leave you in a room temperature environment, ok? Awww you're already dripping condensation... There's a puddle gathering at your base, my leaky little condensation slut.
can you put that on a coaster
No. I want her to see all her little circle stains on the table...
okay thats cute and all but this table was my grandmother's so i would really appreciate it if you could stop and actually consider other peoples belongings for 2 fucking seconds

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watching jerma's old stardew valley vids from ten years ago for the first time. this poor guy had like 5 cabbages planted and like 8 string beans on his entire farm. and a meteor hit his farm and obliterated half of his string beans. he attempted to break the meteor with a cherry bomb which only served to destroy 3 of the 4 remaining string beans. he destroyed the remaining string bean in a fit of rage
they killed him for this
we gotta get back to torrent distribution, i just watched someone eat eight grand in bandwidth charges because they ran a direct-download piracy site with local file hosting through cloudflare. torrents were invented literally for this exact reason
torrents work like this
i have a file or folder on my pc that i want to share with other people. let's call it gayshit.mp3
unfortunately gayshit.mp3 is 750mb and im not paying for discord nitro so i need another way to send it
i put it into qbittorrent and it makes a torrent file. this is essentially a very small file that points to gayshit.mp3 so other computers can find it. kinda like a treasure map
i send this tiny file to my friend, who loads it into qbittorrent. their computer takes a moment to find mine over the vast expanse of cyberspace and then (as long as my pc is running and the file is still where it should be), it gets copied from my hard drive to theirs
this is the cool part: if somebody else loads that tiny file, they can download it from both of us. if i'm offline but my friend is on, the third person can still get it. this also means that if two people have separate halves of the file, they can download the other half from each other. as long as some combination of people have the pieces between them, they can all have the whole thing.
crucially this does not require a server!!! you can just upload the file to a few people and as long as they keep it, it's still accessible. as long as somebody, somewhere is still connected, it's available forever. the only way it goes away is if everybody disconnects from it.
please learn to torrent
An expert guide to get started using torrentsTorrents are one of the most popular forms of file sharing on the internet, accounting for over
always use qbittorrent, do not use bittorrent or utorrent.
The oldest living tree ever found was a pine named “Prometheus.” It had been alive since before the Egyptian pyramids were built. Some guy cut it down in 1964. Source
he was actually a forestry graduate student who was doing research on bristlecone pines (Pinus langaevea) and got his increment borer stuck in the tree. this tool costs almost $800, so he asked the forest service if he could cut down the tree to recover the tool. after cutting it down, it became apparent that the tree was actually the oldest living organism. ever. (around 8,000 years old). so, not just some asshole. the guy feels extremely guilty and has even broken down in tears during an interview about the accident
OH MY GOD SO LET ME TELL YOU A STORY
So after the grad student cut down the tree and discovered it was the oldest tree in the world he quit studying forestry and went to study salt flats (can’t cut down the oldest trees in the world on salt flats no siree none of that happening) and he was being interviewed about his research, but in the middle of the interview the reporter just stops and says “wait aren’t the guy that…”
And he just takes off running. Literally. Turns around and runs across the salt flats away from the interview and I feel so bad for him but I can’t help but start crying I’m laughing so hard about it imagine a guy high tailing it across salt flats away from a dude with a recorder
its so different to know it was an accident and that NO ONE was aware until after. its not like this was one ignorant guy cutting down a fucking relic.

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it’s so scary that fish teeth sometimes look like people teeth. you’re not supposed to have that. well maybe piranhas are scared of us having piranha teeth. i will reflect on my human centric worldview (folds my hands behind my back and gazes out at the horizon)
kitty perfect weight for picking up for cuddles! kitty very Soft and warm and will purr comfortably in your arms. Pick up kitty. no problems ever when picking up kitty because good weight and size for picking up after surgery.