I Hate It Here

I would like to say I didn't say that or I didn't do that.

I hate my life because my life hates me first.

When I try to put myself first, I get trouble.

I can't even go to the eye doctor without hearing "you can't do that".

Why can't I spend $300 out of pocket, losing out on $400 earned to get lights flashed in my eyes & get disrespected.

You think I hoped and prayed for vision issues. Fuck you.

I hate people so much sometimes. Some dumbass mfs I tell you what.

Sleep by 12am, showered, moisturized, medicated, and clothes picked

Awake by 5am, put afternoon workout clothes downstairs, bullshit until 645am

Out the door by 650am, work by 715am

715am get coffee, ice water, and set belongings down

730am clock-in, walk around, or set up classroom until 750am

750am pick up student and start the day

250pm drive home

315pm Supernatural

350pm shower and nap

6pm bullshit

10pm Supernatural. Bullshit. Shower.

12am do it all again

I am obsessed with my weight. I gained some pounds again & things are going wrong in my life. There's always an issue. There's always a problem. I can't control these things and it's so upsetting.

I don't want to be a mean person. However, I need to be. I think I need to focus on me & say that's enough.