murdoc pissing compilation

ah fuck i've been shadowbanned again

follow me here for my awesome yappery (i'm still reblogging to murdoccomp and my art account, @murdocpisscomp is still fine)

send any interaction over to oralvanish

that poll going around of the guy who thought "people only eat tofu as a bit because they're deranged vegans" or whatever really crystalizes something that i have never been able to precisely say - which is "a nonzero fraction of people who start picky-eater discourse just happen to precisely hate those foods which are not from north america and refuse to introspect on this whatsoever"

In contrast some people say "there aren't any picky eaters in Asia 🙄" but this is laughably untrue. I have a cousin in India who refused until his 20s to eat anything in a sauce. as you can imagine in India this was difficult. he basically had to pick things out of curry and wipe them dry

*turns a perfect 180 degrees so that my cutting board-flat ass is facing you* *i walk away with feminine swagger but masculine contempt*

Anyone gonna ask what the hell the other guy is doing with his legs

don't worry about it

fascinated by jeff the killer tbh. everyone in that creepypasta has generic white usamerican names (jeff, keith, barbara, billy, etc.) except for jeff the killer's doe eyed little brother liu. why is he liu. is liu chinese? it's okay if he's chinese. is jeff also chinese? has jeff the killer been chinese this whole time? am I a bad person?

earlier this year 2 boys got expelled from my school for going on a teachers email and sending another teacher an email that says “you’re a disgusting little man” and i laugh about it all the time because imagine opening an email from your coworker and thinking it’s important and then it says that

I'm imagining a world where RPGMaker somehow made it as the de facto codebase for software and you have to navigate your banking app by walking around in a huge room full of NPCs named "make deposit" and "make withdrawal" etc and there's loud as fuck stock music playing

In 2026, the chicest thing a gay actor can do is never explicitly come out as gay but also make it abundantly clear that he is. Coming out is too modern. Staying closeted is too old fashioned. But this method merges contemporary freedom with Old Hollywood glamour and allure, and it weeds out the dumbest people who truly don’t get it. I call it the Pascal Method.

Taylor Swift does this

no she doesn’t

You clearly don't go here or to queer history and signaling, or both, enough to have this conversation and I'm not going to explain it to you. You could have asked questions, you could have done even a modicum of research. You didn't and you made yourself look ignorant. Goodbye.

#I'm fucking crying#this is an instant classic#this is the next meme#i can't believe I'm here to see a baby copypasta nary two hours old#I can't#lol#i laughed way too hard#iconic

Can we find a sun god or diety from every timezone and make a map of them all?

We probably can, but the question is should we?

How else will ship captains know who to pray to when they circumnavigate the globe?

…Give me until the end of the weekend. 

Well, there you have it folks. Safe travels.

I read this as “know who to pay to” and now I’ve decided sun gods are also the patron gods of tollbooths.

Yea sorry, the NYPD is hiring porn bots now we just need to get a confession to meet our quota

technically all men are lightskin because if you’ve ever held a dick you can feel the heartbeat

I just do not understand how Arby’s still makes money

????? ??????

Imagine being the gays at a pride event in 2004 living their lives when someone grabs the microphone and announces to the room that Ronald Reagan was pronounced dead. Can you even imagine the hype, the celebration, the pure elation

This is the Pride Month that It will happen. I feel it in my gay bones

I often think about that post that was a fake dating profile for a cat that was all about chickens, like wanting someone with posable thumbs for opening chickens.

"An insult to practically everybody with any point of view at all" one of the most beautiful sentences possible with the English language.