Kazui's loyal knight

there are 2 singers we will call them gumi and miku for simplicity. blue text is miku green text is gumi white text is both.

i will be using a combination of hazuki no yume's translation and the vocaloid lyrics wiki.

as usual i won't be looking too deeply into the words for the sake of my sanity, but there are words in english relating to violence/death (unborn, snuff film, choke, violent), love (i got you, i could die for you, dependence, kissing, together, heart), crime/law (convicted, system, evidence, erroneous, just), suffering (aching, devastation, suffer, broken, help, calamity) and misc social interaction things (school, audience, blog, expression, ignorance, attitude).

image:

there are two circles and two xs, which brings to my mind an idea of correct/incorrect, but by the way they are placed they look like two female symbols ♀ lying next to each other. this is a subtle hint to the fact that this song is about lesbians.

now lyrics:

Starting to say something, only to stop short– It's still the same as ever, with us two going around in circles, and acting as if we don't notice that. As always, we merely feign ignorance... Losing an argument, or winning one– I'm always starting a complicated mess of an argument unprompted, only to grovel my way back into your good graces, making a real spectacle of myself, y'know...!

this establishes that the relationship between gumi and miku is one where they fight a lot, but always come back to each other. i'm going to jump the gun a bit and say that "starting to say something, only to stop short" is referring to their deeper feelings of love for each other, which miku won't admit to.

I don't know when it started, but it seems like this little heart of mine has been screaming out nonstop. “Just give me a break already,” it says. But before it gives out, let's entangle with each other and shed tears of joy! This is just a small act of defiance, to show our discontent against the kind of norms dictated by “common sense” and whatnot. Before we resign ourselves to a “Indeed, you're right,” …shall we just hastily make a run for it, with our tails between our legs?

so this relationship is causing gumi a lot of stress. she describes their relationship as a small act of defiance, but also says that she wants to entangle with each other and shed tears of joy so she's a fake idgafer.

resign ourselves to a “indeed, you're right” = follow social norms = stop being lesbians. shall we just hastily make a run for it, because despite everything they say in this song, they deeply want to be together and get away from it all.

it's interesting that she seems to characterize their relationship as something that they want because it's taboo and nothing more, but the rest of the song contradicts this. she minimizes the importance of it to herself as a way to cope. miku also does this through the fights she starts.

We've stopped in our tracks again, having become unable to comprehend our situation, as the people say "Serves you right!" What a brutal world we live in, aah! Looks like we've been driven into a corner. They're expressing a considerable amount of disgust. Incessant camera flashes– hey, looks like they're applauding, how idiotic... How about we indulge in this fleeting delusion of being loved that's painted our vision in pure white? Shall we do something we shouldn't...?

the reason why people hate them so much is never clearly stated, but i think it's very obvious that it's because of homophobia. incessant camera flashes and looks like they're applauding are probably not literal, it paints the picture of them being seen as a freakshow for merely existing. "fleeting delusion of being loved" once again minimizes their relationship, it seems that they've internalized some of the things that have been said about them. even as they say that their love is not real, they choose each other despite it being "something we shouldn't [do]".

We're always rephrasing and then retorting. As expected, the two of us, having found secure footing in this chilly, frozen current, are disappointed by the future we'd promised each other... We keep haphazardly tying it up and then unraveling it again, prolonging our commonplace protest. Before you cut in with something like “No, you see...” …shall we at least try to keep this promise?

always rephrasing and then retorting = always repeating the same things in different ways (not so sure about this one). i guess the chilly, frozen current represents society #deep. i wonder if in this case the secure footing would be the relationship? "disappointed by the future we'd promised each other" makes me think that it wasn't always such a mess, and it was only as they were mistreated by the people around them that they began to take their feelings out on each other.

haphazardly tying it up and then unraveling it again = reconciling and breaking up and reconciling etc. this constant cycle prolongs the relationship, because they never actually leave each other. i think "before you cut in with something like 'no, actually...'" means let's stop arguing and try to keep our promise. it's not clear what the promise is, but considering that this is right before they start talking about killing themselves, i'm going to guess it's something like being together forever, or at least together until we die. then, you can also read "prolonging our commonplace protest" as prolonging our lives.

A swing-and-miss point of view, an overlooked common ground. “Jump off!” they say!? This world is such a joke! Aaaaah! For a vague, self-serving reason, the “highly anticipated!” showtime. Incessant camera flashes– hey, looks like they're applauding, how idiotic... This is where our memories come to an end. “Before we splatter ourselves all over the place, won't you give me one last kiss...?”

a swing-and-miss point of view, an overlooked common ground - i'm really not sure here but i'll do my best. considering this comes right before they mention people telling them to kill themselves, my best guess is this is saying people are wrong about many things but at least we agree on one thing (that we need to kill ourselves). this doesn't seem right though so i don't know.

they refer to their suicide as a highly anticipated showtime, since this is what the people around them have been wanting, and they refer to their despair at being unable to be together as a vague, self-serving reason to do it. whenever they speak about their situation, they do it in this mocking, seemingly uncaring tone, all while their actions show how much it affects them. they say their relationship is a delusion and a disappointment, but they want to be together. they act like they don't care about the people who treat them as spectacles, but they can't be happy because of it. they say their reasons are vague and self-serving, but they felt that life was too painful to keep living.

Eternal freedom. Saccharine sorrow. Desiring. Coming to the public eye, Love and affection. This and that. The two of us dream of, we cling to and depend on an impossible dream. Without any change, without any answers, we’ve completely exhausted ourselves.

so this part is actually quite complicated because the girls #ourgirls are singing simultaneously here, so i would think the intended way to view this is by taking each singer's lines and translating them separately from each other, but both translations here seem to have translated the lyrics as if they were one continuous stream. as a result, they kind of make no sense. like this is just saying words with no clear connection. i tried separating what each girl says and making my own translation, and while i did my best with deepl and japandict i don't speak japanese so i can't be 100% sure that it's accurate.

Seeking freedom together, we spoke of love and romance, dreaming of impossible dreams. Yet here we are, unchanged, utterly exhausted.

Sweet sorrow—outwardly, we say this and that, but it’s just an unattainable dream. We cling to it, we embrace it, lost in confusion, utterly exhausted.

here they are being more vulnerable than before, admitting that they really do love each other, but they feel that they can never be happy together, and it hurts. it's a tone that's distinctly different from the rest of the song, and the music fits this as well, being slower than any other point in the song.

We sling words at each other, but dance around the word “hate,” we close our eyes, we feign smiles. We search for the right thing to say, spilling our hearts, and going out of our way to make our futures hell.

self-explanatory idk. they act like they're fine and don't care about being ostracized, ignoring their feelings in hopes it'll make them feel better, only for the emotions to come out when they argue, but they still can't bring themselves to truly hate each other and leave. they still try to make it work and stay together despite it only making life more difficult for them (going out of our way to make our futures hell).

A spectacle of searching for misunderstandings. Seems it's become intolerable. It's no use just improvising, indeed, it's no use at all... Our feelings of affection will vanish, but let me hear this emotionally-charged “manifesto” you've come up with, in this, our final moment...!

spectacle of searching for misunderstandings - referring to their relationship, since its already been likened to a spectacle, and they keep searching for reasons to argue.

it's no use just improvising - can also be something like "it's no use just winging it". just continuing to live and be together hoping it'll work out somehow isn't working.

emotionally-charged "manifesto" - i tried looking into this since i wasn't sure what it meant, the og japanese is “感情論 - argument based on emotion, sentimental argument”. i think this is referring to their decision to commit double suicide? it frames it as being because they were afraid that if they kept going like this they would eventually stop loving each other, which is supported by the way it was brought up some sections ago (“...shall we at least try to keep this promise?”). the only reason i'm a bit hesitant on this is because then the placement of this line doesn't really make sense, since they've already decided to do it, so there's no need to convince the other if that makes sense...? i couldn't come up with anything else, though.

Looks like we've been driven into a corner. They're expressing a considerable amount of disgust. Incessant camera flashes– hey, looks like they're applauding, how idiotic... We burn our retinas until they're completely black, and fill our brains with happy thoughts! Like a solution to the sensation of being wildly at odds all the time, the scenery from upside down is so,

burned retinas are caused by staring at very bright lights, such as the sun. in this case, i think the light is the camera flashes (which i think are not bright enough to burn retinas but this is all metaphorical so it doesn't matter). the happy thoughts might be that they won't have to deal with this again, or that they are happy this moment will be immortalized by pictures, or that they're changing the trajectory of these people's lives by killing themselves in front of them, or something entirely different. who knows.

like a solution to the sensation of being wildly at odds all the time - self-explanatory i'm trying not to repeat myself too much (trying).

scenery is upside down because they jumped headfirst. the song cuts off abruptly mid-sentence because they hit the ground and die. thanks for reading here is my textpost assignment for this song