Mountains of Pens

like sometimes you just have to toast yesterday’s bread put some sicilian tomatoes and a fuckton of mozzarella and oregano on it and call it a day

sorry. sorry it's pissing me the fuck off that people are assuming i didn't put olive oil on this. you think im putting unseasoned tomatoes on my bruschetta. do you genuinely think i didn't pour oil on that toasted bread the moment it came off the pan. of course i added fucking olive oil and salt and stuff like who the fuck do you think i am do you think i was raised by fucking wolves. i didn't mention it because it's obvious. automatic. implicit. did i add olive oil. did i. i'll tell you more actually not only did i add olive oil but my olive oil is extra super virgin in a way your oil will never be because it comes directly from my olives. you cunts

so fucking done with this post SO fucking done. no i didn’t toast the bread in the oil you’re insane if you think i’m cooking my extra super virgin olive oil besides that’s just not how you toast bread so literally seek professional help. second no i did not add garlic or balsamic vinegar you are once again insane. you only use those when your other ingredients are LACKING something and my ingredients are simply not LACKING anything. my tomatoes are perfectly balanced my mozzarella is rich and creamy and my olive oil as already discussed is superior. don’t you ever fucking come into my house and suggest or insinuate in any way i should use garlic and vinegar because i know exactly what im doing unlike you fucks

Jane Austen really said ‘I respect the “I can fix him” movement but that’s just not me. He’ll fix himself if knows what’s good for him’ and that’s why her works are still calling the shots today.

Meanwhile Emily Brönte just said “We can make each other worse.” 

Mary Shelley said, "I can make him

rice fills me with joy and happiness, but more importantly it fills me with rice