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Triggering kinks here 👍

thinking about forced piercings. not just the pain of the piercing as some kind of punishment, but the following days, weeks, months of aftercare and maintenance as the piercing heals. the imposed cleanings, my hands bound so i don’t remove the unwanted jewelry, my whole body bound if i try to agitate it. submitting to the softness of their hands and the idea that they can be gentle when they want to be, matched against the brutality they mete against the rest of me. finally healing enough to change the jewelry, only to start it all over again on the other side or the next spot. 

nothing a cigarette and a blunt and some vodka and calling my senate and researching moral ocd and destroying all of my interpersonal relationships and acting on the urges and jacking off and killing myself cant fix

i know honey, i heard you, you're "not in the mood for sex." and that's okay! but this isn't sex. this is just me beating you til you cry. see? all better♥️

wish porn addiction was real. wish porn addict older siblings were real. sighs kicks a pebble

where is my sibling thts gonna leave their door open a crack bc they know im a nosy shit n catch me on their bedroom floor, wide eyed n reeling, surrounded by crinkled dirty mags with their laptop screen lighting up my scared little face n playing something tht sounds like it’s right out of a horror movie n they just sigh n shut n lock the door n unbuckle their belt n look at me remorsefully like this is gonna hurt them more than its gonna hurt me but a “ur gonna smoke the whole pack” mentality is the only thing thts gonna keep me from becoming just like them. where iis it

i rlly love how exhausted the body gets from breath play it’s barely anything happening and yet it destroyed so easily

Haha what if I got too drunk at a party n you had to shove your fingers in the back of my throat haha. And you held back my hair while I threw up straight liquor. And you rubbed my back while I cried. And I felt so so bad and the only thing keeping me together was your warm skin and the cold tile biting into my knees. And I was shaking. And then you took that opportunity to take advantage of me in the secluded unfamiliar bathroom that was still spinning for me. Haha.

And you were the one who got me this drunk by handing me drink after drink and when I wouldn't do it willingly you held my jaw open and poured shots in

hiii sorry if this comes off as a little forward but do u mind drugging me so i can wake up dizzy and disoriented to you rutting into my pussy like an animal in heat all while filming me?

Your captor making you record a video statement of how you actually consented to all of it and that you’re alright and enjoying yourself, promising you they’ll stop hurting you if you comply and do it right. You don’t really trust them, but you think there’s a chance they’re going to send it to your loved ones. So you put on the performance of your life in hopes of at least letting them know you’re still alive and there’s hope. As calm and serious as you can, as many retakes as you need to do, until your captor is content. But instead of sending the video to anyone at all, they play it to you on repeat every time they rape you. Every time you’re abused you hear yourself saying you’re exactly where you want to be. And you keep telling yourself you don’t really believe what you’re hearing your own voice tell you, but it doesn’t take too long until you realize you nonetheless know the words by heart

reverse conversion therapy on the brain… a needle for every time you say no… oh ok so you’re a dyke now? you mean it? you promise? are you sure you’re not just saying that because i went down a couple gauges?