A Heist Gone Silly

okay. fine. i have a solution that will make no one happy. let's make pluto a planet. if we launch one tungsten cube per day for 200 years precisely aimed at pluto's surface it will become massive enough to gravitationally clear its orbit of other kuiper belt objects. this will be completely useless and extremely expensive as well as potentially dangerous. and it will destroy the heart

this isn't the gif i thought it would be .

The lads at the skate park cant believe my latest stunt: pop shove-it while cracking a creme brulee. “teach us the Amelie”, they beg. i wont

ambassador garak jaunts around paris with big ass sunglasses on 24/7 not for fashion or mystique reasons but because his eyes are constantly running in the sun and he can’t be seen like that. end log entry

sob emoji is up there with the period and the comma

love island should introduce a "scheming eunuch" islander who is like a smart and completely asexual islander exempt from being kicked off or being made to participate in any challenges and they're just there to provide advice and be a sort of sounding board for the other islanders when they need a disinterested party to talk things through with. but the scheming eunuch has secret goals unbeknownst to anyone e.g. a cash prize for talking a certain couple into breaking up etc.

Some fake things that aren't real are low key really importsnt

ohh i get it now (doesn’t)

My understanders will Understand me

walking around the dashboard at four in the morning stepping on all the creaking posts loud as fuck

some of you people are so annoying. i mean me too but good lord