tender is the night

YESSS HAHAHAAAA EVERYONE AND THEIR MOTHER DMING ME ABOUT IT AND VICE VERSA. literally crying laughing like oh my god he's so mad. we're not crazy he really was checked the fuck out OKAY. OKAYYYY. EVERYBODY HATES THIS FR🙏

a romance between two men does not automatically make a story good representation. especially when those characters are reduced to a set of generic traits: they are kind, they love each other, and that is basically it. we have already seen countless stories like that, and this is not just about gay relationships. people loved aziraphale and crowley not because they were a couple. they loved them as individuals: complex, contradictory characters with their own dynamic, history, and personalities that developed over many years. that is why it feels so strange to watch them be replaced with a flatter version of the same idea

you enjoyed the finale. thats great. have a gold star. everyone is entitled to feel the way they feel about it. but I just dont understand it. I dont understand the positivity surrounding it. I feel like people are fucking clutching at straws or something trying to make it good in their heads when the reality is that everybody got the fucking infinity war ending. they got thanos snapped out of bloody existence and they didnt come back. no. they rebooted the universe.

im a marvel nerd so forgive this comparison but...you know not even the avengers wanted to do that? the avengers wanted all the original people back. that was the whole point of getting the fucking infinity stones. hulk snapped his fingers and brought everybody back. yes, it was 5 years later but the point was that everybody they had lost, everybody they loved, came back as they were.

why the fuck couldnt the good omens ending have been more like that? we dont want copies. we want the originals. as was said in the job storyline (that apparently means fucking nothing now because it never happened) we dont want new children, we want the old ones.

maybe i am a bitter old man. maybe im being too harsh. but genuinely, just think for a second what you are praising was a good ending. just think what these characters meant to people. just think what they represent. hope. love. survival. growth. being themselves. shades of grey. not fitting in but choosing their own path to escape the systems that hurt them.

and then think of the fucking finale that butchered all of that.

these characters showed me that i should keep going, keep surviving. that i dont have to fit in to be worthy of love. that i dont have to be ashamed of who I am. that my trauma and my mistakes dont define me. aziraphale and crowley survived so many hardships, so much trauma but they kept fucking going and that trauma wasnt all they had. because they had happiness too. shared lunches. adventures together. laughter. subtle touches. love spanned across 6 millenia. they were not traumatised husks. they were not on either side fully. they were themselves. and even though yes, they were constantly afraid of heaven and hell, they still found ways to find joy in the mundane. they still drank wine together, they still ate lunch together, they still hung out with eachother all the fucking time despite their abuse.

they could still have trauma and still experience happiness. still grow from it. still survive and love and smile. and that kind of message speaks to someone like me on a personal level. its why I fell in love with them so much. especially crowley. crowley always kept going even when he wanted to run away. even when he wanted to give up. his whole character arc was that he is an optimist at heart and he always knew the universe would take care of him.

to see him the way he was in the finale, to see him choose murder-suicide and bring aziraphale down with him...that goes against everything we've been shown him to be. a sarcastic cynical bastard at times, yeah, but a fucking survivor. and not only that, a survivor who is so in love with his angel he was shown to be giving up literally in that exact episode because aziraphale had left him! and then youre telling me he has a chance to be with him, something he's always wanted and he chooses to sacrifice them both instead? sacrificing himself i can understand i suppose...in a way, but aziraphale? and aziraphale just fucking folded and let him?

do you have any idea how harmful that message actually is to people? especially neurodivergent, mentally ill, traumatised, queer people like myself? it just makes me feel like im fundamentally unworthy of a happy ending because im fucking traumatised. and my bpd makes me feel like a bad person all the time anyway. i have always felt unworthy. thats why i related to crowley. and crowley always gave me the strength to keep going, that i am not just my bpd, just like he isnt just a demon. hes a good person. but now...what, none of that even meant anything because he chose to end it all? fuck, this notion that eradicating everything, eradicating the characters that mean the world to me because they keep fucking surviving, and doing it in a self sacrificial way, this notion that its a good ending truly fucking baffles me. all that theyve gone through, all that growth, all that love...it suddenly doesnt mean a damn thing. they killed themselves. its so fucking harmful. genuinely.

people saying they loved humanity more than themselves, yeah okay. but the whole purpose of season 1 was they wanted to stop armageddon because they loved earth too much. they loved all their earthly delights. but the main thing was that they wanted to experience it. and they were useless in the end anyway because all the humans stopped armageddon! they didnt do a damn thing. adam, the antichrist, chose to ignore his purpose and tell off his dad and save the fucking world along with the them and anathema and newt and even fucking shadwell and tracy in some weird way. aziraphale and crowley basically did nothing. and that was what free will was all about! anathema chose to burn the rest of the prophecies, adam chose to save the world not end it. aziraphale and crowley chose to save eachother from certain destruction and get heaven and hell off their backs because they loved earth and humanity and wanted to experience it with them. they all chose free will and they all ignored who they were supposed to be.

so when crowley asks god about free will, why is that suddenly an issue? crowley already knows that angels and demons are basically useless to humanity anyway, they all think up horrible stuff themselves and get on with it and crowley just takes the credit for it. free will was never the problem. the problem was heaven and hell constantly trying to end the fucking world. crowley always wanted to know what the purpose of everything was. why make the world and then end it in 6000 years. he was curious. he asked questions. that was the point. then all of a sudden it becomes about giving the humans free will when they literally always fucking had it.

so yeah. no. not buying it. everytime I think about it i get angrier. there were so many different ways they could have ended it. think of the thousands of fanfics that were made post s2. and they chose the one ending that nobody fucking wanted. not only that, they somehow made it worse by choosing to completely destroy everything including aziraphale and crowley. then tried to soothe the burn with asa and anthony like we arent completely choking on the current fucking smoke.

its bullshit. it pisses me off. it entirely defeats the purpose of s1 and the book. it defeats the purpose of the job storyline. they butchered aziraphale and crowleys characters. they made crowley a pessimistic suicidal ball of depression and they made aziraphale the villain. no one said one nice thing to aziraphale that entire episode. there were plot holes everywhere. the jesus storyline went fucking nowhere. the metatron villain arc they were building went nowhere. I get they only had 90 minutes but cmon!

it was just a big depression shit show and I am eradicating it from my brain entirely. it is not the characters I fell in love with. it is not how I hoped the ending would go.

I just wanted them to retire to the south downs. an angel and a demon, living together in a peaceful cottage. crowley having his own garden. aziraphale having his own library. doing mundane domestic things together. loving eachother openly and fully and without fear.

people who say there was no other way...hello?? they literally wrote a new book of life. physically willed god into existence. they could have just said "bring everything back but heaven and hell dont interfere anymore".

if they were so willing to trust god and asked god herself for there to be a godless universe, then, yknow, I am fairly certain they could have fucking asked for this simple thing??

the ending is a dark tragedy to what was initially a fantasy comedy series.

and I. did not. care. for it.

Bury Your Gays

I’ve decided to slowly start translating my scribbles after all

"Tryin' tae kill yerself?? It's... I mean... it's NOT ON!!"