͟ ͟ ꫶ࣺ᭮᭰͟͟͟͟͟♥︎̼̻ about me : -The government knows me as Misty. She/her, Eighteen, South Asian.
ᯓ★ˎˊ˗Interest :- I'm a mixed Fandom girl I can watch anime , kdramas, movies etc but mostly into books and anime.
ᯓ♪Music:- Enjoy listening to Taylor, selena, Ariana, Arctic Monkey ,The Neighbourhood, Chase Atlantic, Dua Lipa and Lana del rey.
ᯓ➤ Socials:- Into Insta , YouTube and Pinterest
. 💫𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒ ᯓ★ 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐧'𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 𓂃 ࣪˖
. ╭┈➤ 🌱 𝗔𝗴𝗲
. If you're under 13, I'd appreciate it if you didn't interact with my page.
. ╭┈➤ 🦥 𝗥𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝘀
. «Always open! Just keep in mind I won't write content that makes me uncomfortable, including cheating, extreme age gaps,×malereade!r, smut, yandere, or similar themes.»
. ╭┈➤ 🐣 𝗖𝗿𝗲𝗱𝗶𝘁𝘀
. «Most of what you'll find here is my own writing or edits. Any fan art I use belongs to its respective artists.»
. ╭┈➤ ☁️ 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗴𝗿𝗼𝘄𝘀 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲
. «Thoughts, reblogs, little rambles, and a tendency to romanticize the ordinary.»
. ╭┈➤ 🐢 𝗖𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗴𝗮𝗿𝗱𝗲𝗻
. «Mostly Blue Lock and Wind Breaker... though gardens grow, and fandoms change.»
The earth does not belong to us. we belong to the earth. We are the mere travelers made of star stuff and dust, were merely adopted by the kind mother earth. Born from the soil of earth let's not burn the earth. We all come from the same seed growing in the same garden, drinking from the same rain so why put boundaries in vain??. We may come from the stars but we are cradled by our mother earth.
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For as long as you could remember, Itoshi Rin had always been so… so closed off.
Even now, after weeks of observing him, you still found yourself at odds with the walls that Rin built around himself. It was strange— he was strange. Emotionally guarded and distant but also strangely straightforward. A paradox that you couldn't quite wrap your head around, Rin was the kind of mystery that filled you with unadulterated impulse.
And in true you fashion, to sate the curiosity that clawed at you with persistence, you'd ended up impulsively confessing.
The words tumbled out without much— any thought. You never mentioned outright that you liked him, only implying it, but Rin, despite his lack of social cues, came to a conclusion.
"You're like a cat. I like them."
"…"
He was silent for a while, admittedly taken aback by your roundabout confession, till he responded with a nod. And when you owlishly blinked in confusion, not exactly sure how to interpret his questionable gesture, he returned your stare with an even gaze. Lashes fluttering as he slowly blinked back at you much like a feline, a cat's kiss, a ridiculous thought overcame him as he took in the brilliance of your eyes.
“You look like an owl."
They were cute, you were also— kind of… really cute.
"Oh."
"…I'm quite fond of them."
You gaped at his candid response, did he mistake your insight for flirting? Was that why he flirted back? No, you shook your head at the ridiculous thought. There was no way the stoic and emotionally stunted boy was flirting with you, much less knew what flirting was. Yeah, he most likely pointed out the resemblance you shared with the bird because he was awed by your wisdom! Or so you thought.
Following the days of your strange interaction, something even stranger started happening.
Itoshi Rin, in all his apathetic glory, began to tether his ghostly presence to yourself.
Somehow, the boy got his hands on your schedule, made a mental note of it, and aligned his timetable to match yours. Every day without fail, he'd save a place for you beside him in the dining haul, and everyday without any complaints, he'd patiently wait by the school gates to walk you home, absolutely adamant that you walked on the inside of the pavement. It was a non-negotiable. Something you weren't even allowed to argue against.
Carrying your bag even if it wasn't heavy was indisputable. Shielding you from the rain and the winds with his mortifyingly oversized jacket was irrefutable. His unusual gestures were conducted in absolute silence, the kind that was slightly awkward but not exactly uncomfortable…
Out of completely thin air, Itoshi Rin, the unapproachable Ice Prince, became your routine. He didn't take no for answer, not that you could ever refuse him, not when he stared at you like that…
Not even now, as he handed you the bigger half of the twin ice lolly, could you even consider the outlandish thought.
"Thank you…" You mumbled taking the ice-cream from him, your hand briefly touching his much cooler ones.
"Hm." He merely hummed, wordlessly taking your bag from you and hooking it over his broad shoulder as he strictly nudged you away from the roadside of the pavement.
A familiar silence stretched between you two, the kind that made you question him, the sudden development between you two— everything. Why was he doing this? You didn't understand, you couldn't comprehend it, not one bit. How did you go from not talking to him at all to— well, still not talking to him as much… but to now receiving his strange acts of service? The confusion you let fester into curiosity eventually overwhelmed you, and unable to keep those thoughts to yourself, you blurted them out before they could be properly processed.
"I don't get it. Why do you do all this?" You gestured vaguely with you free hand, puzzlement written all over your face as he intently stared at you.
"Do you.. want me to stop?" He asked quietly, turning to face you with furrowed brows. Seeing you shake your head so ardently in response to his solemn question eased the self-doubt that settled in his stomach. Ears flushing red, he grabbed your unoccupied hand and laced both your fingers together. "Then don't question it, Owlette."
Voice soft, a soft smile grew on your face as you gently squeezed his hand back. "Okay, Catboy."
Character:- Isagi Yoichi, bachira,reo Mikage, nagi seishiro, kaiser Micheal
Synopsis:- Bllk boys's girlfriends getting along. Tag your girls! . The post is platonic!
A/n:- I decided to write it in third pov it could have really difficult for me think of names or to write in a way that you guys will understand who is who. I got this idea cuz My two cousins who hate hate eachother actually decided to go to the same events because Their girlfriends love each other it was so fun to watch them acting all dudies!
The duos that make sense
1. Yoichi's girlfriend x Meguru's girlfriend
Now Isagi and Bachira are already good friends; so it won't be a surprise that they introduced their girlfriends to one another or in general they have heard of each other but them becoming proper friends was something purely accidental. Isagi's girlfriend isn't as intensely analytical as he is but she's naturally observant and has a dry sense of humor that catches people off guard. Bachira's girlfriend is playful, curious, and a little absent-minded in the best way. She's the type who follows whatever catches her interest for the next five minutes. Neither is particularly loud but together they somehow become the source of the strangest conversations imaginable.
✦ Their shopping trips always take twice as long as they should.
They'll walk into a convenience store intending to buy one bottle of water and come out forty-five minutes later because they somehow spent ten minutes reading the back of a package of seaweed chips, fifteen minutes comparing the mascots on different yogurt brands, and another ten debating which instant noodles had the prettiest packaging.
The boys have learned not to ask what took so long. The answer is never useful.
Bachira once asked.
"We found a pudding shaped like a bear"
"...And?"
"We bought four"
"...Why four?"
"It looked lonely"
Bachira accepted that explanation immediately.
Isagi simply accepted it because he had no other choice.
✦ They have a habit of collecting pictures of things instead of people.
Their camera rolls aren't filled with selfies.
Instead—
A duck sleeping with one leg tucked in,A cloud shaped vaguely like a football, A vending machine that somehow had only one drink left,A cat sitting like an old man ᴏr A pair of shoes abandoned in the middle of the sidewalk.
Months later they'll scroll back and immediately remember where they were and what they were talking about when they found it. Isagi thinks it's oddly sentimental while Bachira thinks it's genius.
✦If they find a claw machine...
...they're staying there.
Neither is particularly good at winning but that has never stopped them. The boys have watched them spend thirty minutes trying to rescue a plush penguin worth less than the money they've already put into the machine.
Eventually Bachira wins it on his first try.
His girlfriend snatches it "Thanks!"
"I was going to give it to you anyway"
"I know"
✦They try teaching their boys a trending hand game.
The girls clap.
Cross hands
Spin
Snap.
Easy.
And isagi and Bachira genuinely tries to follow there instructions but that doesn't mean they get it right for the first 3 attempts. Bachira's mistake looks so intentional that the other 3 thinks he's doing it on purpose and maybe he's who knows on he other hand isagi take it as challange even swinging his hips to a side while snapping his fingers which yearned him a smack to his ass by his girl.
✦ They accidentally create inside jokes nobody else understands.
One day one of them simply says— "Wednesday."
The other immediately starts laughing and the boys stare.
"What happened on Wednesday?"
"...Nothing."
"You literally cried laughing."
"We can't explain."
"You can."
"We really can't."
To this day nobody knows what "Wednesday" means. Even bachira's monster admitted defeat cuz neither of the two girls are willing to tell who's this "flat soda" they keep talking about.
2. SEISHIRO'S GIRLFRIEND AND REO'S GIRLFRIEND.
Their girls thought that they were probably the third and fourth wheeler in their relationship at first but then decided to form a community online to trade secret NAGIREO pics for fun and money!.
Nagi's girlfriend isn't lazy the way Nagi is, but she's incredibly easygoing. She's the type who doesn't feel the need to fill every silence with conversation. She can sit beside someone for an hour doing her own thing and still call it quality time. She's creative in quiet ways—crocheting badly, doodling on sticky notes, collecting songs she thinks people would like but never actually sending them. while Reo's girlfriend is organized without being controlling. She genuinely enjoys planning things, remembers birthdays without reminders, and somehow always has tissues, lip balm, a portable charger, and painkillers in her bag. She isn't the "mom friend," though. She just likes being prepared because it makes life easier.
Their friendship begins because Reo's girlfriend notices Nagi's girlfriend sewing a button back onto her cardigan while everyone else is talking.
"You carry a sewing kit?"
"...Doesn't everyone?"
"No
"...Oh"
That somehow becomes the start of everything.
✦They unintentionally become the group's "lost and found"
Nobody knows how. But whenever Someone loses an earbud? They've already found it.
Reo can't find his wallet?
"It's under the passenger seat."
"...How do you know?"
"I watched you drop it yesterday"
"..."
Nagi spends twenty minutes looking for his hoodie before his girlfriend quietly points at the hoodie he's already wearing.
"...Oh"
Nobody laughs harder than Reo.
✦ They are terrible influences on each other's hobbies.
Reo's girlfriend teaches Nagi's girlfriend how to crochet. Now there are tiny crocheted frogs everywhere.
Nagi finds one sitting on his game controller.
Another inside his hoodie pocket. One attached to his sports bag zipper.
He doesn't react on the outside but inside? He finds them cute.
He simply starts collecting them. Months later Reo notices Nagi has an entire shelf dedicated to tiny frogs.
"...Since when?"
"They multiply."
✦ Whenever they're left alone for too long...
...they start reorganizing things.
Reo's bookshelf becomes color-coded. His pantry suddenly has labels, his refrigerator somehow has categories now and He genuinely appreciates the effort.
Nagi, meanwhile... returns home to discover someone folded his T-shirts vertically. He stands there for a full minute.
"...Where's the blue one?"
His girlfriend opens the second drawer.
"...Oh" He secretly likes it.
He'll never admit he couldn't find anything before.
✦Every shopping trip ends with Reo carrying every bag.
Not because anyone asks him to. Because he physically cannot watch someone struggle with three shopping bags.
His girlfriend hands him one.
Then another.
Then Nagi's girlfriend quietly adds hers too.
Reo doesn't even notice until he's carrying six.
Nagi looks at him.
"...You know you can say no"
"I know"
"You won't"
"...I kno."
✦ Nagi becomes the unofficial test subject.
Whenever his girlfriend learns something new—
New hairstyle?
"Sit"
New baking recipe?
"Taste this."
New skincare product?
"Does this smell weird?"
New nail polish?
"Give me your hand."
Nagi never objects.
Mostly because objecting sounds like effort. Reo once walked in to find Nagi absentmindedly playing a game while one hand had tiny stars painted across the nails.
"...Do you know?"
Nagi glanced down.
"...Yeah."
"...You don't mind?"
"...She (nagi's girlfriend) looked happy." That was apparently enough explanation.
Everyone assumes this friendship is going to end in disaster. Mostly because Shidou's girlfriend is the type to enthusiastically suggest things like, "Let's see where that abandoned path goes."
While Chigiri's girlfriend immediately asks,
"...Do you have pepper spray?"
They're complete opposites in terms of energy. Not values but the energy. One thinks first, the other thinks halfway through.
Somehow...It works.
They✦ develop a ritual called...
"One bad idea per outing."
Shidou's girlfriend is allowed exactly one impulsive suggestion.
Exactly one.
After that, Chigiri's girlfriend has veto power.
"Let's rent a tandem bicycle."
"...Fine."
"Let's sneak into that closed rooftop."
"No"
"You said one bad idea."
"You already used it."
"Damn"
✦ Chigiri's girlfriend carries a tiny first-aid pouch not because she's clumsy or anything because she knows exactly who she's friends with.
The funny part?
Half the supplies end up being used on Shidou himself.
✦ They text each other things that make absolutely no sense.
[ Emergency]
[??]
[ I found a duck wearing shoes.]
[ Location? ]
Its never "Are you okay?"
Just—
"Location?"
✦ Chigiri's girlfriend eventually realizes...
...her friend is physically incapable of leaving a carnival without trying every game.
Meanwhile Shidou's girlfriend realizes Chigiri's girlfriend is physically incapable of walking past a cosmetics shop without saying,
"...Five minutes"
It's never five minutes
✦ Chigiri doesn't understand why his girlfriend keeps coming home with stories that begin with,
"So... we almost got kicked out..."
He always waits for the ending. The ending is somehow never Shidou's girlfriend's fault alone his girlfriend is always laughing too hard to pretend she wasn't involved.
while Shidou thinks it's the funniest friendship ever created. He absolutely loves hearing to hos girlfriend yapping.
"No, listen to what happened this time" Every story sounds like the start of a police report
His only complaint?
"They never invite me."
His girlfriend immediately replies,
"Because you make everything worse"
"...Fair"
✦ Double dates never go according to plan.
The original plan is always simple.
Lunch
Walk around
Go home
Instead—
Shidou's girlfriend spots one of those giant inflatable obstacle courses set up in a nearby park "We're doing that."
Chigiri's girlfriend looks at her "...We're adults"
"So?"
"..."
"...You already bought the tickets, didn't you?"
"...Maybe"
Twenty minutes later, Shidou is halfway through racing children because "NO EIGHT-YEAR-OLD IS BEATING ME."
Meanwhile, Chigiri is standing at the finish line watching his girlfriend laugh so hard she nearly falls over after getting stuck inside one of the inflatable tunnels.
"...I thought you said adults don't do this."
She points at Shidou, currently arguing with a nine-year-old who cheated.
"I was wrong"
✦The girls somehow discover...
...that Chigiri and Shidou are both ridiculously competitive.
Not just in football. Everything.
Who reaches the elevator first,Who finishes their drink first, Who folds a napkin faster.
One afternoon, Shidou casually says,
"I could definitely beat Princess over there in Mario Kart."
Chigiri slowly looks up.
"...Princess?"
"My bad."
"..."
"...Your Highness."
The girls immediately grab controllers.
Neither boy wins.
Because halfway through the race the girls quietly form an alliance and spend the entire game sabotaging both of them instead.
"...THAT WAS TARGETED!"
Girls : "It was
Shidou : "Nah that was explosive"
✦ Chigiri slowly realizes his girlfriend has become significantly braver since meeting Shidou's girlfriend. She'll suggest trying new restaurants,
Random train rides. Karaoke. Not reckless things.
Just things she'd normally overthink.
One day she casually says,
"I booked us all for indoor rock climbing."
Chigiri nearly drops his water bottle.
"...You?"
"...Yeah "
"...Voluntarily?"
"...Stop making it sound unbelievable."
Shidou proudly points at his girlfriend "She's evolving."
• Meanwhile.. Shidou notices the opposite.
His girlfriend has started carrying sunscreen,
Actually drinking water, Stretching before activities. She even owns comfortable walking shoes now.
"...Who are you?"
She blinks.
"...A woman with healthy knees."
"...Boring."
Chigiri's girlfriend quietly hands Shidou a bottle of water.
"You too."
"..."
"...Fine."
✦They make playlists for each other...
...that makes absolutely no sense.
One playlist is called—
Songs That Feel Like Orange Juice.
Another—
Clouds At 6:17 PM.
Chigiri reads the titles "...How does a song taste like orange juice?"
His girlfriend shrugs. "It just does"
Shidou doesn't even question it.
"Pfft, Number seven definitely tastes like mango!"
"...THANK YOU!"
2. Kaiser's girlfriend × isagi's girlfriend
Nobody understands why they became friends. It all started with stumbling into cafe by chance togather both somehow choiced the last piece of almond berry.
"Opps. You have it"
"It's ok I will just choice something else"
"Wanna split it?"
And somehow that simple conversation lead them to spaming insta reels to eachother after three weeks.
Kaiser's girlfriend has expensive taste without being snobbish. She likes vintage cafés, museums, perfumes, and always seems like she has her life together. Isagi's girlfriend is much more casual. She forgets to charge her phone, gets distracted by cute stationery, and has a habit of stopping mid-conversation because she spotted a cat across the street.
And their boyfriends hate each other.
By all accounts...
They shouldn't click.
Except they do.
Because both of them find people fascinating. One simply observes with elegance and the other observes with curiosity.
Unfortunately... Their boyfriends are among the most fascinating people either of them has ever met.
✦ The girls create a ranking system.
Not for football. For...How dramatic their boyfriends are after losing literally anything.
Level One—
Quiet denial
Level Two—
Over-analysis
Level Three—
Existential crisis.
Level Four—
"Kaiser."
"...What?"
"It's Uno."
"...I know"
"You don't need a revenge match."
"...I do"
✦ They have a shared album called...
"They're Actually The Same Person."
Contents include—Both boys reading shampoo bottles while waiting.Both unconsciously bouncing one leg when thinking.Both forgetting their drinks because they became distracted.
Both saying "...One more"
During games.
The funniest picture— Neither realizes they're standing in exactly the same pose.
Arms crossed.
Head tilted.
Thinking and all
Kaiser finds the album.
"...Excuse me?"
His girlfriend looks up "Hm?"
"Delete that"
"No."
"I look ridiculous."
Isagi's girlfriend leans over "...Actually that's one of your better photos."
Kaiser pauses.
"...Really?"
"...No."
The girls burst into laughter.
✦ Isagi accidentally becomes the third wheel.
The girls spend twenty minutes discussing perfumes. He tries listening. He really does.
Five minutes later— "...What's a top note?"
Silence. Kaiser's girlfriend smiles kindly "You smell it first."
"...And a base note?"
"Later."
"..."
"...Football is easier."
• Kaiser also becomes the third wheel.
The girls somehow begin discussing documentaries. History, Random animal facts.
Ancient architecture.
Kaiser sighs dramatically "...You two are nerds."
Isagi's girlfriend smiles "We know."
Kaiser's girlfriend nods "It's relaxing."
"...You're discussing Roman concrete."
"It lasted thousands of years"
"...Fair enough"
✦ Kaiser discovers Isagi's girlfriend laughs at terrible puns.
It starts by accident.
A waiter says "That'll plate your order."
She giggles.
Kaiser notices "...Seriously?"
"...It was funny."
"It objectively wasn't."
The next week...Kaiser deliberately starts making awful puns just to see if she'll laugh.
She does.
Every.
Single.
Time.
Isagi watches in disbelief "...You're encouraging him."
"I know"
"Please stop"
"I physically can't!"
Kaiser's girlfriend quietly mutters "...We've created a monster."
✦ The girls accidentally become Kaiser's biggest weakness.
Kaiser is impossible to embarrass... Or so everyone thinks.One afternoon, the girls are scrolling through old pictures together when Kaiser's girlfriend casually says,
"...You know, Yoichi actually smiles really nicely when he isn't thinking."
Isagi immediately looks away "...What?"
"You do."
"...I don't."
"You literally do."
Kaiser's girlfriend nods in agreement.
Then Isagi's girlfriend, without thinking, says "Kaiser does too."
The table goes quiet,Kaiser blinks once "...Excuse me?"
"You have a nice smile"
"..."
"..."
"...That's... different"
His girlfriend raises an eyebrow "...Different?"
"I know"
The girls don't realize what they've done. Isagi does. He's trying so hard not to laugh because Kaiser—Michael Kaiser—has genuinely short-circuited after receiving a completely normal compliment. He spends the next five minutes pretending to fix his hair.
✦ They discover the fastest way to end an argument.
Food.
Not because either boy gets distracted easily. But because neither likes talking with a full mouth.
The girls don't even interrupt anymore.
As soon as the conversation starts escalating. One silently slides dessert toward Isagi. The other hands Kaiser another fork.
"...Eat."
"...We're talking."
"...Eat first."
Five blissful minutes of silence.
• Kaiser insists he doesn't care...
...until Isagi's girlfriend compliments his cooking. It happens during a group barbecue. Kaiser had been unusually invested in grilling.
When she takes one bite she genuinely says "...This is really good."
He tries to act casual "Obviously."
But for the next twenty minutes he keeps hovering nearby.
"...Need another?"
"No, thank you"
"Are you sure?"
"...Yes"
"...There's more"
His own girlfriend watches him "...You're fishing for compliments."
"I'm accepting accurate observations."
✦ Isagi accidentally asks Kaiser's girlfriend for help.
They're trying to assemble something complicated. Kaiser disappears to answer a phone call.
Without thinking, Isagi asks "...Can you hold this?"
She does. They finish the entire shelf before Kaiser comes back.
"...You built it without me?"
"You were gone."
"...I would've done it faster."
His girlfriend pats his shoulder.
"We're all very proud of your imaginary speed."
✦The girls secretly enjoy watching them fail at ignoring each other.
If Kaiser walks into a room first, Isagi notices.
If Isagi walks into a room first, Kaiser notices.
Neither looks directly.
Neither says hello.
Yet somehow both know exactly where the other is.
One day Isagi's girlfriend quietly asks "...Do you think they have some kind of sixth sense?"
Kaiser's girlfriend doesn't even hesitate "No."
"What then?"
"...Professional hating."
• The funniest realization...
One afternoon, the girls separately ask the exact same question
Kaiser's girlfriend asks "So... what do you admire about Isagi?"
Kaiser scoffs immediately "Admire?"
Across town, Isagi's girlfriend asks "What do you think Kaiser's best quality is?"
A/n:- This fan fic is for one of my friend's birthday! who is a big fan of Kaiser (^^).
Part 2, part 1
I didn't have it in myself to go with grace
Character:- Michael Kaiser
Michael Kaiser hated charity appearances As much he loves people looking at him , making him the centre of attention he absolutely despises the look those casualties cast at him.. especially the kids looking at him with those navie innocent smiles that leave him feeling helpless at times cuz he doesn't know what to do with that sincere thank you.
He hated the carefully rehearsed questions, and the photographers who somehow managed to capture the exact millisecond his expression slipped into obvious irritation. Every visit followed the same script Shake hands Sign shirts Pose for pictures Say something inspiring. Leave.
His manager called it "maintaining public goodwill."
Kaiser called it unpaid overtime
The rehabilitation center wasn't even on his schedule until three days ago The Bastard München's marketing department had partnered with a local foundation during the team's preseason tour, and suddenly every player had found themselves assigned a public appearance Ness had been sent to a youth football clinic Grimm was filming promotional content.
Kaiser, naturally had been given the hospital
Because according to the PR team, his popularity would generate the most media attention
The lobby buzzed with quiet activity by the time he arrived Camera crews were already setting up near a wall covered in hospital artwork while several staff members adjusted banners displaying the foundation's logo A coordinator hurried over the moment He spotted him, offering the practiced smile of someone trying very hard not to look nervous.
"Mr. Kaiser, thank you again for coming"
He answered with the casual smirk of his
, One that looked confident enough for photographs. "I'm here, aren't I?"
He either missed the sarcasm or chose to ignore it
"We'll begin with a short tour of the pediatric wing, then spend about twenty minutes meeting patients who've volunteered to participate. After that, we'll have the media photos before you head to the football workshop downstairs."
Twenty minutes was Manageable
He'd spent longer sitting through sponsor meetings. The tour unfolded exactly as expected
Children shyly asked for autographs.
Parents thanked him for visiting
Doctors explained rehabilitation programs while photographers hovered a respectful distance away, capturing every handshake and smile
Kaiser played his part flawlessly.
Because he was good at understanding that all these people here want a piece of Michael Kaiser
By the time the first section was over and cameras were packing away to move to other wards He leaned back on his seat yawning as stared at the ceiling.
One of the doctors stopped him "There is... one small change."
He sighed internally Of course there was
"One of our patients couldn't come down."
She glanced toward a nearby corridor
"She's twenty-three, so she isn't technically part of today's pediatric event, but she's been here for several months She's also a football fan."
Kaiser raised an eyebrow "I thought this was over" he had no intention of doing more overtime which was something that obvious from his voice
"It almost is" Her smile turned apologetic.
"Just five minutes."
Five minutes became ten
That was usually how these things went.
He checked the time on his watch before slipping his phone back into his pocket
"...Fine" She visibly relaxed
"Thank you." As they walked through the quieter inpatient wing, the atmosphere changed
The laughter from downstairs faded behind closed doors.
There were fewer decorations here
Fewer visitors which probably means it was the vip section But the silence felt different it was more permanent. The coordinator slowed outside one room.
"Come in." A soft voice cut through his thoughts as he looked at the young women sitting on the hospital bed
You looked up from your notebook as the door opened Your expression changed only slightly.
"Oh" You closed the laptop.
"So they actually convinced you to come"
That made kaiser raise a brow it was not Oh my God
Kaiser looked at the doctor.
Then back at you
Kaiser looked around the room once before returning his attention to you.
It didn't look like the room of someone who had arrived a few days ago A cardigan hung neatly over the back of a chair There were two mugs by the windowsill, one holding pens instead of coffee. Sticky notes were scattered across the wall beside the bed—not motivational quotes, but reminders written in hurried handwriting
Submit assignment before Friday
Reply to Mom.
Don't forget the library due date
A pair of slippers sat tucked beneath the bed as though this had become less of a hospital room and more of an apartment someone had been forced to borrow.
"You can come in," you said after noticing neither of them had moved "Or stand in the doorway dramatically Either works."
The doctor let out an awkward laugh.
Kaiser walked in standing in the hallway felt more ridiculous.
"I'll leave you two for a few minutes," the doctor said "Mr. Kaiser probably has another event afterward."
"Of course he does."
You leaned back against the raised hospital bed "He looks expensive."
The door clicked shut and Silence settled over the room
Kaiser glanced toward the hallway
Then back at you.
"...What exactly does that mean?"
"You look like someone with a schedule."
"I do."
"I can tell."
He folded his arms "And how, exactly?"
"You looked at your watch before coming in."
'faur enough' His eyes flicked down instinctively before immediately returning to your face
You smiled.
Not smugly But rather Like you'd won something very small
He clicked his tongue "You're observant."
"I don't have much else to do." The sentence landed more heavily than either of you expected
You didn't seem bothered by it. Kaiser let his gaze wander around the room again.
No football posters.
No framed photographs of him
No signed jerseys waiting to be autographed.
Just books
Too many books.
"...You're not much of a football fan."
"I didn't say I wasn't."
"You haven't asked for a picture."
"No But I liked the bicycle kick against Manshine" You stated.
Kaiser raised an eyebrow "Only liked?"
You looked at him "It was technically impressive But I still think you held the ball a touch too long before shooting."
The room went silent
Kaiser stared at you "...Excuse me?"
"You asked"
"I did"
"You could've released it earlier."
"You think so"
"I do."
He folded his arms "And what position do you play?"
"I don't."
"So you've never played."
"No."
"And yet you're criticizing my decision-making."
"I'm criticizing one decision, They're different things."
"You've got confidence." Kaiser's brow twitched a bit
"So do you"
"I've earned mine"
"I wasn't saying you hadn't"
The answer came so naturally that Kaiser actually paused Not because it was clever.
He had heard thousands of people try to challenge him Most of them either did it because they wanted attention or because they wanted to prove they weren't intimidated by him Usually, there was an underlying desire to impress him but You weren't trying to win nor were You weren't trying to put him in his place.
You were simply stating your opinion.
And somehow, that irritated him more
Because Michael Kaiser was used to people reacting to him.
Awe. Envy Jealousy Admiration Even hatred All of it was still attention. Anything
You looked at him like he was just a person standing in a hospital room A very arrogant person, apparently The thought annoyed him.
But He wasn't sure whether to be offended or impressed that you managed to get him here to waste his time and annoy him Sure he enjoyed people who challenge his attitude but someone doing that while sitting in a hospital bed looking like one gust of wind was enough to end them was not something in 2023 bingo card.
"So why did they ask me to come here?"
"I didn't " You answered immediately
"I couldn't go because I was not the part of that event. They asked me if I'd like to meet one of the Bastard München's players."
"And?"
"I asked if they had Noa."
Kaiser stared.
"...They said he wasn't available."
"So they sent me." Kaiser actually wanted to laugh.
"I suppose."
Silence
"...You're smiling."
"I am."
"You find that funny."
"A little."
He let out a dry scoff "You're unbelievable "You do realize who you're talking to, right?"
You tilted your head "Yes."
"And?"
"And you're still a person." Kaiser swear if ness was here he could have lost it on his behalf Kaiser had spent years building an image that nobody could touch. The genius striker The emperor The player who didn't need anyone.
He liked that image,He needed that image It protected him from being ordinary And you had looked straight through it without even trying.
"You really have no idea how to talk to people, do you?"
"You came here because of PR."
"And?"
"So you're probably used to people saying what makes you feel good."
The corner of his mouth twitched "You think you know me?"
"No." You looked at him with honesty.
"I think I know the version of you everyone sees."
Kaiser watched you carefully "And what version is that?"
You tapped your pen against the page of your notebook "The one who acts like he's already won" The words weren't insulting rather they were an observation.
"And maybe you have" You shrugged slightly.
"But people who are actually confident don't usually need to remind everyone."
For once... Kaiser had no immediate response Not because you were right- He refused to admit that.
The visit was supposed to last five minutes.
Then ten.
Then fifteen
The coordinator had stopped standing near the door
The photographer had already left
Nobody was forcing him to stay anymore.
Yet he remained sitting in the chair beside your bed.
He blamed boredom That was the easiest explanation,The hospital was boring The room was boring The conversation was unexpectedly less boring.
That was all
Definitely
"You actually wrote a bucket list?"
The notebook was still open beside you You glanced down "Oh" You flipped the cover slightly.
"Yeah"
"Why?"
"Because there are things I don't want to leave without doing."
Kaiser noticed the way you phrased it Not before I die, Not because I don't have time Just... Things you didn't want to leave without doing.
He leaned forward slightl "What kind of things?"
You looked surprised "You're interested?"
"No." He paused for a bit "I'm judging."
"Of course you are." You handed him the notebook anyway He almost refused Keyword:- Almost. Then curiosity won
The pages were filled with handwriting Not dramatic wishes, Small things Things that most people never thought twice about.
Eat twenty-four flavors of ice cream in one day
Done.
Watch the sunrise from the beach
Done.
Learn how to make terrible latte art
Done.
Some remained untouched.
Get kicked out of a museum
Steal a traffic cone
Dance in the rain with someone who won't complain.
See snow one last time.
Take a train somewhere random and spend a day there.
Kaiser looked through the pages silently honestly he expected something bigger Something more fitting for someone who knew their time was limited.
Instead...
You had written down things people constantly postponed Things people assumed they could do later
You had stopped believing in that luxury.
"You haven't completed many"
You looked over "No"
"Why?"
A small smile appeared on your face "Because I kept waiting for the right time" The answer was so ordinary that it was almost painful.
Kaiser closed the notebook "You waited"
You nodded "Everyone does."
Something about that sentence stayed with him Because he did the same thing Not with bucket lists but with everything else in his . He could escape when he had enough money He would be happier after the next trophy More satisfied after the next achievement.
More complete after proving himself again.
Again
Again.
Again
The next thing was always supposed to be enough if he kept winning and proving himself that could be enough to prove himself one day that he was a human that can be loved.
It never was
The visits became strangely inconsistent in a way that somehow made them routine Kaiser never said he was coming, and you never asked if he would Some weeks he'd appear three afternoons in a row, complaining that the hospital coffee was offensive to humanity while somehow finishing the entire cup anyway.
Other times he'd disappear for nearly a week before strolling back in as though nothing had happened, offering no explanation and expecting none to be asked
Somewhere between those afternoons, a few pages of the bucket list quietly disappeared One rainy morning, the two of you argued over whether breakfast tasted different when eaten on the hospital rooftop at sunrise.
Another day ended with Kaiser insisting you had absolutely no strategic ability after somehow talking him into losing a board game he claimed he'd "let happen." There was also an afternoon that involved an impulsive train ride approved by your doctors, a station neither of you had planned to get off at, and Kaiser declaring the entire town "criminally boring" while refusing to admit he'd enjoyed the day.
Not every visit became another crossed-off page Sometimes he simply occupied the chair beside your bed, scrolling through football clips while criticizing players who would never hear him.
Sometimes you studied for university between treatments, and he'd lean over without invitation, mock your notes, claim your handwriting looked like a tactical disaster, then somehow end up quizzing you until you remembered the material Neither of you acknowledged that those were often the days he stayed the longest.
The hospital staff gradually stopped reacting to his appearances altogether Nurses no longer whispered when Michael Kaiser walked through the corridor; they merely nodded toward wherever you'd wandered off to that day "Library." "Garden." "Physiotherapy." He'd mutter something about how you had an irritating habit of never sitting still, only to find you within minutes anyway.
Every time, he acted mildly inconvenienced by the search Every time, he came back the next week regardless.
The rehabilitation gym was louder than usual Not because there were more people.
Because one of the younger patients had convinced the therapists to play music while everyone worked through their exercises.
Kaiser found it unbearable He came to you after he got a break from his practice match which lasted two weeks and now that he was free here he was again watching you Falling to meet the beats "...This playlist is criminal."
Nobody listened and Least of all you You were halfway across the room, arguing with a therapist over whether one more lap counted as "overdoing it."
"It doesn't."
"It absolutely does."
"I said one."
"You said that fifteen minutes ago."
Kaiser rolled his eyes "Listen to the professional for once." Without even turning around, you replied "I'm trying not to."
"You'll lose."
"I haven't yet
Kaiser leaned back in his seat as declared you Arrogant and Annoying in his head yet again.
It happened less than a minute later Your foot caught the edge of the training step a simpler common mistake , the kind of mistake anyone could make at least once while recovering . Your balance disappeared for a fraction of a second before the therapist reacted, catching your arm before you reached the floor The room barely changed, The music continued Someone laughed at another table The therapist immediately steadied you.
"You alright?"
You nodded almost instantly "I'm okay."
It had lasted... Maybe two seconds Nobody seemed particularly alarmed.
Nobody... Except Kaiser.
His chair scraped harshly against the floor before he'd even realized he'd stood up
His pulse had already spiked His body had moved before his brain had finished processing what happened, by the time it did he'd crossed half the room.
Only to stop.
Because there wasn't anything to do The therapist already had you; You weren't injured You were apologizing for startling everyone.
No one had even asked for his help.
The realization hit him all at once.
...What the hell am I doing?
He stood there for another second before clicking his tongue in annoyance.
"Losing your balance over nothing." His voice was stiffer than the usual tone he use "You call that walking?"
You blinked "I tripped."
"Congratulations" He folded his arms.
"Very graceful."
The therapist frowned slightly at him.
"It was an accident."
"I'm aware" His eyes stayed on you.
"If that's your idea of rehabilitation, ask them to lower the difficulty." The words landed harder than he expected not because they were particularly cruel.
Because they were unfair You looked at him for a second then quietly smiled "I'll try harder next time."
No argument, No sarcasm Just that.
For some reason... That irritated him even more than he already was he can't pinpoint why bu there suddenly is one or many ugly emotions that were crawling into his chest
"Trying isn't the same as succeeding."
The therapist finally spoke.
"I think that's enough, Mr. Kaiser."
He looked at the therapist then back at you.
You weren't angry nor were You embarrassed You were simply Looking at him.
Like you knew something he didn't.
He clicked his tongue "...This place is depressing." Without another word, he turned and walked out.
The corridor felt too quiet.
His footsteps echoed sharply against the polished floor He shoved both hands into his pockets, jaw clenched so tightly it hurt.
"...Pathetic."
The word came automatically.
At first...
He meant you Someone who almost fell because their own body refused to cooperate That was pathetic.
Weak.
Fragile.
.
.
No.
The thought stopped halfway He wasn't talking about you anymore he was talking about himself He had crossed the room before thinking He had reacted before assessing.
He had felt fear.
Real fear Not because of a football match Not because of losing.
Because for one irrational second... He had imagined what would've happened if the therapist hadn't caught you.
His breathing slowed.
"...Ridiculous."
Curiosity Kaiser repeated the word into his head again and again like that could convince his heart too.
For almost a week after that afternoon in rehabilitation, something felt... off Not obvious enough for anyone else to notice but enough that you did.
Kaiser still came He still occupied the same chair, still criticized whatever book you happened to be reading, still complained about the hospital coffee and insisted the café had somehow made it worse since his last visit.
On the surface...
Nothing had changed
Yet every now and then, you'd catch him staring Not at the notebook but at you Only for him to look away the moment you noticed.The conversations became shorter,
His sarcasm sharper, The pauses between sentences are longer.
It was as though he kept starting a thought before deciding it was safer left unfinished.
One evening, rain drummed steadily against the windows while the hospital settled into its quieter hours Your room was dim except for the small lamp beside your bed.
You were crossing another assignment off your university planner when Kaiser spoke without looking up from his phone.
"...What's left?"
You glanced at the notebook "On the bucket list?"
He nodded once.
"Three."
"Only three?"
"Mm."
Silence
He expected relief Instead, something about that number sat heavily in the room.
You turned another page.
"The doctors think..." You hesitated.
"...if everything stays stable, I might be allowed home for a while."
He looked up.
Home It should've been good news It was infact a good news.
"So?"
"So..." You smiled, though it didn't quite reach your eyes.
"I don't know."
"You don't know whether going home is good?"
"I don't know what home looks like anymore."
The words escaped before you could stop them
The room became very still.
"I've been here long enough that everything outside kept moving." Your fingers traced the edge of the blanket "My friends graduated."
"My little cousin's taller than me now."
"The café near my university closed."
"My parents learned how to visit instead of waiting for me."
A quiet laugh escaped you before you can stop yourself "I think everyone's gotten used to living around me instead of with me."
Kaiser said nothing while You continued almost absentmindedly.
"I wonder if I'd know how to be normal again."
Something inside him recoiled.
Normal.
You were talking as though your life had already split into two versions.
Before
After
As though you'd accepted it.
As though you'd accepted limits
The same anger from the rehabilitation room returned.
Except this time...
It had somewhere to go.
"You think too much."
You blinked.
"What?"
"You heard me." His voice had become flat Colder even "You keep talking like your life's already over."
"I didn't say that."
"You implied it."
"I said things changed."
"You accepted they changed."
The notebook slowly closed in your lap "I don't think those are the same thing."
"They are."
"No."
"They are if you stop fighting."
You frowned "I haven't stopped."
"Really?" His laugh was short.
Mocking.
"You made a list because you were afraid you'd never get another chance."
"It wasn't—"
"You celebrate eating breakfast like it's some incredible achievement."
"It mattered to me."
"It shouldn't."
The words were immediate.
Harsh.
"If that's enough for you, then maybe you've just lowered the bar because it's easier than admitting you've already given up."
The Silence that followed was heavy as the sentence hung between you Heavy and Wrong You stared at him trying to understand where this was coming from.
"You don't mean that." Those words came out in a low voice
His jaw tightened at the weight of your gazd and words "You don't get to tell me what I mean."
"I know you"
"No" He stood abruptly, the chair scraping loudly across the floor "You know the version of me you invented because it makes you feel better."
Your chest tightened at that "I never—"
"You did" His voice rose for the first time.
"You think because I keep showing up, you understand me?"
"I didn't say that." That response came immediately from as you looked up at him with a brief amount of confusion wondering why the conversation had turned this direction
"You don't know anything" His expression hardened almost immediately, every trace of uncertainty disappearing beneath the familiar arrogance he wore like armor.
"...There it is , I was wondering when this would happen."
You frowned "What are you talking about?"
"This." He gestured vaguely between the two of you "You start treating people like they owe you understanding."
"I never said you owed me anything."
"You didn't have to."
His voice remained calm, that somehow made it worse "You know what your problem is?"
You stayed silent.
"You've gotten comfortable." The words landed heavily "Comfortable with people slowing down for you, "Comfortable with everyone adjusting around you, Comfortable with being told you're trying your best."
Your fingers tightened around the notebook.
"Kaiser..."
"No." He cut you off "You wanted honesty, didn't you? So here's some You keep acting like the world is supposed to wait."
"It won't."
"It never does."
A long silence settled over the room.When you finally spoke, your voice was barely above a whisper.
"...I know." The words weren't defensive or angry Just tired "I know it won't."
He should've stopped.Any reasonable person would've Instead, the quiet acceptance in your voice only made something inside him lash out harder.
"Then stop talking like you've accepted it."
"I haven't."
"You have."
"I've accepted that some things are out of my control."
"That's the excuse people make when they're afraid to fail." The answer came too quickly , too certain And that was exactly what bothered him.
Because you weren't the one who sounded defeated You sounded calm You sounded like someone who had already made peace with something he was still fighting against.
Kaiser hated that He hated how easily you could say things he couldn't. How you could acknowledge something painful without letting it consume you Meanwhile, he was standing there, angry at a situation he couldn't beat, a problem he couldn't solve, a future he couldn't control.
And somehow...
You were the one he thought was giving up?
Ridiculous.
His expression hardened.
"That's your problem."
You looked at him.
"You think accepting something means you've won."
The words came out sharper than intended.
"You convince yourself you're being realistic because it hurts less than admitting you wanted something you couldn't have."
Silence.
You didn't answer.
That only irritated him more.
Because he was used to resistance.
Used to people pushing back.
Used to opponents fighting until the very end.
Not this quiet understanding.
Not someone looking at him like they could see exactly what he was doing.
"You know what I don't understand?"
His voice lowered.
"You make this list You write down all these things you want to do You talk about places you want to see, things you want to experience..."
He gestured toward the notebook.
"Then you sit here and act like you're supposed to be grateful for whatever scraps you get."
The Hurt was evident on your face as you countinue to stare up at him."I don't think that."
"Really?" The disbelief in his voice was almost cruel "Because that's what it looks like."
"Kaiser..."
"No." He interrupted immediately.
Because if you continued, there was a chance you'd say something he couldn't handle.
"You know what the difference is between you and me?"
A pause.
"I don't accept losing."
The sentence came out almost automatically "I don't care if something is impossible I don't care how many people say it can't be done."
His eyes narrowed.
"I find a way."
The irony wasn't lost on him Not even for a second Because this was exactly what made him angry You weren't losing because you lacked determination, You weren't losing because you weren't trying.
You were facing something that couldn't be defeated by wanting it more.
And Kaiser hated that Because for the first time in his life...There was an opponent he couldn't crush So instead of admitting that, he attacked the only thing he could.
"You've gotten too comfortable with people feeling sorry for you."
The moment the words left his mouth, even he knew he'd gone too far The room changed Your shoulders lowered slightly as fingers tightened around the edge of the notebook You looked like you were tired of being hurt by him.
"...Is that what you think of me?" The question was quiet.
Kaiser opened his mouth Nothing came out
Because the answer was no It had never been no But admitting that meant admitting why he was angry in the first place So he did what he always did.
He chose the easier version.
The crueler version The one where he didn't have to be vulnerable.
"...Maybe I just misunderstood."
A pause.
"Maybe I thought there was something more here." The lie sounded bitter to both you as kaiser left the room.
The strange thing about being sick was that eventually, people stopped seeing you as a person Not completely They still loved you, They still cared They still showed up with worried expressions and gentle voices, bringing food you didn't ask for and reminding you to take medication you hadn't forgotten about They meant well You knew they meant well.
That almost made it harder Because nobody was trying to hurt you But somewhere between every careful question, every concerned glance, every reminder to "take it easy," something slowly changed.
You became someone everyone needed to protect, Someone who had to measure every plan.
Every outing
Every bit of energy.
Before, you had been a person who made plans without calculating the cost afterward You could decide to spend an entire day outside because the weather was nice You could walk into a bookstore and lose three hours without thinking about tomorrow You could make mistakes, waste time, change your mind.
You were allowed to simply exist
Then your body stopped cooperating and suddenly, everything became about what you couldn't do.
Don't overexert yourself
Don't stay out too long.
Don't push yourself.
Be careful
Rest.
The words were always spoken with kindness That was the cruelest part because after hearing them enough times, you started saying them to yourself.
You started questioning every desire before acting on it Was it worth the exhaustion afterward? Was it worth worrying everyone?
Was it worth the pain? Slowly, without anyone intentionally taking it from you, your world became smaller You have never been a self deprecated person but the constant look in the eyes of people you know and love was slowly becoming the reflection that reflected in your own mirror whenever you looked at yourself and slowly...
The hospital room became familiar.
The schedules became familiar
The medication alarms became familiar.
The sound of doctors discussing your body as if it were a machine that needed constant repairs became familiar And somewhere along the way... You started feeling like a guest in your own life Someone who need medication for things which people can do without even putting much thought into it
Then Michael Kaiser appeared And the most ridiculous part was that he was probably the least comforting person you could have met.
He didn't look at you with pity He didn't soften his voice when talking to you. He walked into your room like he owned the place.
He criticized your handwriting.
Complained about your opinions
Argued about football tactics.
Acted offended when you disagreed with him.
He was arrogant.
Annoying
Self-absorbed.
Completely convinced the world revolved around him
And yet.. That was exactly why you liked having him around Because when Kaiser was there, your illness became the least interesting thing about you He didn't come in asking about your pain first, He didn't speak to you like you were already halfway gone.
He treated you like you were still capable of annoying him Still capable of arguing.
Still capable of being wrong Still capable of being a normal person.
It was strange.
Almost comforting Because Kaiser never made you feel like you were fighting to prove you were alive.
He simply assumed you were
And for a while...
That was enough.
But even with Kaiser, reality never completely disappeared You still woke up in the hospital You still had appointments.
You still had days where your body refused to cooperate no matter how badly you wanted it to.
The bucket list helped
At first, it felt exciting.
Like taking control back, Like reminding yourself that your life was still yours.
But there were moments when even that became exhausting Cuz every completed item also reminded you how limited the remaining ones were Every checkmark felt like both a victory and a countdown Every page the near end started bringing the thought whether there will be another page to fill
And Kaiser...
Kaiser became the one person who made you forget about that countdown Which was dangerous Because forgetting felt wonderful But forgetting was temporary.
You noticed things he probably didn't realize.
The way he looked away whenever conversations became too serious.
The way he turned every emotional moment into an argument.
The way he acted like caring was an insult.
You knew him enough by then to understand that his arrogance was not just arrogance
It was armor.
The problem was...
You didn't know how to reach someone who had spent his entire life making sure nobody could And he didn't know how to handle someone who made him want to try.
So when he lashed out... When his words became sharper than usual...Part of you understood
Not because it didn't hurt
It did.
More than you wanted to admit
But because you recognized the fear underneath it The same fear you carried every day...The fear of losing something before you were ready.
The difference was... You had spent months learning how to live with that fear.
Kaiser hadn't;He was still fighting it
And somehow, the person who had come into your life to distract you from reality became the person who reminded you that reality existed too.
Not because he meant to Not because he wanted to hurt you.But because even Michael Kaiser, with all his confidence and arrogance, couldn't outrun the one thing nobody could defeat.
The fact that some things could not be controlled And maybe that was why his absence after that day felt heavier than it should have.
Because for a while... He had made you forget you were sick And now, sitting alone with your notebook closed beside you, you had to remember it all over again.
The first week wasn't difficult.
That was the lie Kaiser preferred.
He buried himself in training with almost violent discipline Morning sessions became longer Extra shooting drills stretched well after everyone else had returned to the locker room If the coaches questioned it, they didn't complain Michael Kaiser training more was hardly a problem.
The physical exhaustion helped the muscles could drown out thoughts
At least for a few hours.
Then came the evenings.
His apartment had always been quiet He liked it that way Everything had its place Boots lined up beneath the shelf Protein powder beside the coffee machine Match footage paused on the television exactly where he'd left it the night before.
Nothing had changed.
That was precisely the problem His eyes drifted toward the second mug sitting in the cabinet.It had been there for years Unused.
He frowned before shutting the cabinet a little harder than necessary.
"...What am I doing?" The question wasn't rhetorical It genuinely irritated him.
Since when had he started imagining someone else existing in spaces that had only ever belonged to him?
He grabbed his keys
Left the apartment.
Went for a drive with no destination anything to keep moving Movement usually solved things Not this time tjo
Every traffic light gave his mind another excuse to wander Every hospital sign he passed became something he deliberately refused to look at.
Pathetic He tightened his grip on the steering wheel until his knuckles turned pale.
By the second week, even Noal noticed "You've been distracted."
Kaiser didn't bother looking up from tying his boots "No."
"You missed three passes today."
"I miss passes."
"Not those."
Silence
Ness who has been standing by the side also decided to join in carefully "You've also stopped correcting me."
That made Kaiser pause "...Excuse me?"
"You usually complain about everything."
"I still do."
"You haven't for days."
Kaiser let out a humorless laugh "So your complaint is that I'm being too nice?"
"No" Ness hesitated "My complaint is that you're acting like you're somewhere else."
The locker room suddenly felt smaller
Kaiser stood.
"So you've started analyzing me now?"
"I'm just saying—"
"I don't remember asking." Ness stopped talking cuz he'd heard that tone before; the one that meant there was no winning.
Kaiser slung his bag over his shoulder.
"If your attention is this divided, maybe worry about your own football first."
He saw it immediately
Ness's shoulders stiffened almost imperceptibly "...Right."
That should have been enough It usually was Instead, Ness simply looked confused As though he couldn't understand what he'd done wrong and Kaiser hated that expression.
Because he recognized it.
He'd seen it somewhere else
In another room.
Another conversation.
Another pair of eyes.
He walked away before the comparison could fully form.
The fourth week arrived quietly It was just another Tuesday Bastard München had finished morning training earlier than expected after the coaching staff cancelled the afternoon tactical session One of the pitches required maintenance, leaving several unexpected hours free before media obligations.
Normally, Kaiser would've welcomed the extra time Instead, he found himself irritated by it, Too much empty space and he has been disliking empty space for a few weeks now as it invited thinking
He tossed his training bag into the passenger seat and started the engine almost automatically The route home was familiar enough that he no longer needed directions
First traffic light
Left
The bridge
Another left
Straight ahead.
His fingers drummed lazily against the steering wheel while the radio mumbled in the background nothing unusual Until... His phone vibrated inside the cup holder His manager Without taking his eyes off the road, Kaiser answered through the car speakers.
"What"
"Where are you?"
"going home"
There was pause on the other side "No, you aren't"
Kaiser frowned "What?"
"I have been standing at your door for 20 minutes??."
He glanced toward the navigation screen.
Only then did he actually look at the road signs His expression froze
The hospital district
He had driven there without noticing, Without deciding, Without thinking The rehabilitation center stood less than two hundred meters ahead, its familiar white building visible beyond a line of trees.
Kaiser stared through the windshield.
The light turned green.
Cars behind him began moving
He didn't A horn sounded then another only then did he press the accelerator Not toward the entrance; Past it.. His grip tightened around the steering wheel until the leather creaked beneath his hands
"...What the hell..."
His manager was still talking through the speakers
"Kaiser? How lon--"
He ended the call without answering.
He pulled into an empty parking lot several streets away The engine shut off as Silence filled the car for almost a full minute, he simply sat there, staring through the windshield He hadn't been thinking about you.
That was the problem.
He hadn't made a conscious decision to come His body had...His routine had quietly rewritten itself over months without asking permission As habits were irritating to break That was all He had become accustomed to wasting an hour every few days arguing with someone whose football opinions were objectively inferior Someone whose gaze could soften at the sight of him being difficult because he refuses to end the board game without winning Someone whose notebook will always have little doodles beside her writing and one of them looks suspiciously like him His mind had filed those visits beside training and recovery.
As normal.
As expected.
And now that they had stopped...His body was still trying to complete a routine that no longer existed He had controlled it well enough these past days until today, weeks of training and pushing himself and when he decided to take a moment to just relax a bit the control slipped so automatically and normally that he didn't notice 3 weeks of telling himself not to think of those memories only pushed to mind to think of them more.
He laughed It sounded hollow inside the empty car "...You've got to be kidding me."
Curiosity He had called it curiosity.
Boredom
Convenience
Passing time
Every excuse had sounded convincing while he was saying it Now they all collapsed beneath one undeniable fact.
No one accidentally drove across an entire city four weeks in a row No one unconsciously memorized traffic lights they supposedly didn't care about and No one instinctively headed toward a place they had convinced themselves they wanted to avoid.
His forehead rested briefly against the steering wheel For the first time in weeks Michael Kaiser admitted something without trying to argue against it.
He missed you
Not the hospital.
Not the distraction.
You.
The realization wasn't romantic nor was it beautiful It was irritating Embarrassing Almost humiliating.
It meant he'd lost long before he'd noticed there had even been a match And somehow...That frightened him more than any defender ever had because for years Machel Kaiser had desired for one thing love he desired to love to be and become someone capable of being human but he knew what he was at least he convinced himself that he knew himself that he was nothing but trash.
Unconsciously or consciously this mindset of his had played a big role in kaiser's life he had always wanted to be loved but got scared everytime someone approached without the look of Envy, anger, despair or anything negative cuz he didn't know how to resipocate them , never know what to do with the look that indicate anything similar to liking or acceptance..
And here? Not only had he felt that feeling from the other side but he himself felt the crushing weight of caring for someone and the worst part is that he didn't even realise when it happened He had once felt the fear of losing everything by a certain man years ago, someone who had threatened everything he had built so it's not that he didn't know the fear of losing something but it rather the helplessness of not knowing what to do
Back then though it wasn't easy to face it he still had faced it, putted efforts into it and it has worked but here he wasn't sure because no matter what amount of effort he will put here he wasn't sure of what the results could be It's not like he can create a magic portion and feed it to cure you He was scared of putting efforts only to lose at the end Michael is a man who believes in doing the impossible for sure but in the end he was still a man not a God and God can be so unfair at times.
He had felt the deep rooted fear the moment he saw you seen fall.He had not seen you two weeks back then and back then he had not thought much of it either because in his mind he was simply going to you after he came back but when he saw failing to perform a normal task that millions of people can do without even thinking anything of it kaiser realise how unfair the can be , how cruel it can be to make such a lovely being for her to suffer, to bring someone to someone's life only for the person watch that person without the certainty to them staying.
So he did the only thing he knew he chose cruelty , he thought it could give him the same satisfaction it had given him for years when applied to others but it hadn't in fact done the opposite It left a deep burn in chest
Kaiser exhaled at those thoughts and leaned head back against the car seat closing his eyes for brief second He had been in this situation before never been the one to care for a person so much that the thought of them disappear hurts ,the thought of staying near them is sparingly good and bad and the thought of not being able to stay near them is unbearable.
Kaiser remained in the car
The realization sat there with him, ugly and immovable.
He had spent his entire life building himself around one principle: if something mattered, he had to become strong enough that nobody could take it from him Strength wasn't simply something he wanted It was the language he'd learned to survive in His talent, his achievements, his arrogance, the way he walked into a room already expecting everyone's attention—none of it had appeared from nowhere Michael Kaiser had spent years turning himself into someone who could never again be reduced to something disposable.
He had learned early that people were easier to understand when they wanted something from you Envy was simple Hatred was simple Fear was simple Even admiration had rules You could use those feelings Manipulate them Stay above them.
But kindness without an obvious price?
Acceptance without submission?
Love without the need to possess or defeat you?
That had always been harder
It was why, somewhere along the way, Kaiser had become so good at making himself difficult to love that he could pretend nobody had ever tried.
And when someone actually had—
he had no idea what to do with it
You had looked at hi without wanting anything from him
That was what had unsettled him from the beginning.
You hadn't cared about the Emperor You had argued with him about football while sitting in a hospital bed You had laughed at him You had called him arrogant to his face You had looked at him when he wasn't performing and somehow hadn't looked disappointed.
Worse, you had made room for him.
Not because he had earned it through some grand achievement.
Not because he had won something
Simply because you wanted him there
Kaiser closed his eyes.
"...Fuck"
His childhood had taught him what happened when you were powerless The man who should have represented safety had instead taught him that dependence was dangerous, that anything you loved could become something used against you Kaiser had taken that lesson and built an entire identity around never being beneath anyone again.
Impossible was just another word for something he hadn't conquered yet.
And football had rewarded that mindset There was always something measurable.
A defender, a goalkeeper, a score A ranking A rival Something he could observe, understand, manipulate and eventually overcome.
Even when Isagi had stripped away the version of himself Kaiser thought was untouchable, there had been something he could do with the humiliation He could evolve He could change his weapon He could abandon the obsession that was holding him back and find another way to score His ego had always survived because football gave him something concrete to fight.
But you...
You weren't a problem he could solve there wasn't even a weakness to exploit No strategy that guaranteed victory He could spend every waking hour searching for specialists, reading medical papers, memorizing every detail of your treatment, paying for the best doctors in the world, dragging you across countries if you needed another opinion—and none of it would give him certainty.
That was what terrified him.Not death itself but the helplessness The possibility of doing everything right and still losing.
Kaiser slowly lifted his head from the steering wheel His reflection stared back at him in the windshield.
For a moment, he looked like the boy he hated remembering.
The one who had learned early that being powerless meant being hurt The one who had discovered that hurting first gave him something resembling control The one who eventually turned that instinct into an identity—eroding other people's hearts, making them feel despair, proving his own existence through the scars he left behind Even his relationship with Ness had originally been shaped by that logic: find someone useful, make them follow, make yourself impossible to ignore.
He had spent years believing that was simply who he was Maybe that was why you frightened him so badly.
You had never needed him to be cruel You had never needed him to prove that he was stronger than you You had never looked at him with hatred or envy or fear You had simply looked at him and accepted that he was there.
A person ,Just Michael
And somehow it was terrifying than being hated Because he knew how to fight hatred He didn't know what to do with being loved.
Kaiser leaned back against the seat.
A quiet laugh escaped him.
"...What a joke"
He had spent his entire life wanting someone to look at him without wanting something from him Yet when someone finally had, he'd panicked so badly that he'd destroyed it himself.
He had called you weak
He had accused you of giving up
He had taken the one thing he knew you were afraid of and shoved it directly into the wound because, for a few seconds, hurting you had made him feel less helpless.
And then he'd walked awa
Just like his father had once used cruelty to deal with feelings he didn't know how to express, Kaiser had learned to turn fear into something ugly and direct it at someone else The realization was not flattering It was disgusting.
But this time, he couldn't lie to himself about it He had already tried running, filled his schedule Told himself that the hospital was behind him, tyhat you were behind him.
And four weeks later, his own car had driven him back there without asking So what exactly had running accomplished?
Nothing.
He had simply traded the fear of losing you for the certainty of regretting that he hadn't tried Kaiser closed his eyes the answer wasn't to guarantee that you would stay.
He couldn't
The answer wasn't to convince himself that everything would magically become fine.
It wouldn't , he knew that much he's not an idiot And it wasn't to pretend that he could somehow defeat your illness by wanting it badly enough.
He couldn't For once, there was no opponent to crush No miracle he could manufacture with sheer ego there was only a choice.
His hand moved toward his neck almost unconsciously, fingers brushing over the blue rose tattoo.The symbol he'd chosen because he refused to surrender to the impossible.
Kaiser let out a slow breath "...So that's it." His reflection stared back at him from the dark windshield He had been waiting for a guarantee that didn't exist Waiting to know that if he returned, you wouldn't disappear.
Waiting to know that if he cared, it wouldn't hurt Waiting to know that if he allowed himself to love someone, he wouldn't eventually be standing alone again.
There was no answer
There never had been.
And if he continued waiting for one, he already knew exactly how this story would end He would lose you without ever giving himself the chance to keep you.
Kaiser laughed quietly
It wasn't bitter this time
More like disbelief
"Pathetic"
The word carried no insult toward you-
Only himself
He reached for his phone and opened it but his thumb hovered over the screen There was no number,no message.
Michael didn't care. That was fine, He wasn't going there because he had figured everything out
He was going because he hadn't
Because he was scared
Because he cared.
Because the possibility of losing you had become more frightening than the possibility of being hurt by loving you.
And because, for all the things Michael Kaiser had spent his life trying to prove—
there was one thing he finally couldn't keep pretending wasn't true.
He wanted you in his life
Not as a distraction
Not as a curiosity
Not as something temporary.
You.
Whatever came after that was something he would have to face when it arrived.
he didn't need to know the ending before he took the first step but he knew that challenges had never stopped him.
A/n:- I know I might have mischaracterized Kaiser here a lot because I have never written about him or read about him before so feel free to correct me ;') . And yea I will probably write an extended ending cuz I have to post it half as my phone was lagging and I was scared as I haven't saved it in my drafts.
Synopsis : It’s funny how the person they once loved, fianlly moved on without them.
Characters : Sae Itoshi , Rin Itoshi , Isagi Yoichi , Reo Mikage , Oliver Aiku.
Part Two : Noa Noel , Chris Prince , Marc Snuffy, Micheal Kaiser, Julian Loki , Vivian Hugo.
Notes : Fem reader, angst, wrote this with pure boredom, failed relationship or whatever, not fully proofread.
･ ༝ ･ Sae Itoshi
Being with Sae Itoshi was nice…
Well, in the beginning.
Sae Itoshi was a man of few words, never particularly gifted when it came to expressing what was in his heart, but he loved you.
You never doubted that—not once.
Sae would always be there for you to soothe you with a kiss on the forehead whenever you were anxious or scared.
Whenever he was off, he’ll wake up before the sunrise just to make you breakfast before you opened your eyes and give you a kiss on the tip of your nose and sit beside you while you eat and he’ll look over his opponets anayltics for the next match.
And when the you two were together in the public—he wasn’t affectionate and not a big fan of pda—but he’ll silently reach for your hand and tighten his grip.
If you carried something heavy, he’d take it.
Your feet are aching from walking? No worries he’ll carry you. If that’s what you wanted.
If you stumbled, he’d catch you before you even trip.
Whenever you stayed at his apartment, he would unconsciously—instictively—pull you into his lap while the two of you watched television, with one lf his arm arm wrapped securely around your waist as though your body naturally belonged there, and he’ll nuzzle at the crook or your nape or your back. You used to laugh every time it happened.
“You know…” you’d tease, absentmindedly tracing circles on his wrist, “…you’re a lot clingier than you pretend to be.”
“…Am I?” He looked up at you from behide and his bangs were disheveled.
“You haven’t let go of me for forty minutes.” You playfully hummed,
“…Should I let go then?” Sae said, you smiled and comforatbly sunk on his lap
“No not at all Mr.Itsohi” you looked back and poke his cheek and he silently took your finger off his cheek and sighed.
But without another word, he’d tighten his arm around you, resting his chin against your shoulder.
“Good, because didn’t want to.”
And went back from nuzzling his face onto you.
And that was how things went in your relationship it was comfortable and every time you two didn’t talk at all it never felt lonely or awkward.
Every night, his arm would draped securely around your waist, holding you with a desperate, heavy tightness, and never wanting to let you go.
You’ll always whisper on his hear how clingy he is and how’d he always embrace you whenever you two were taking a nap or going to sleep. It felt, peaceful, and felt safe being embraced by someone that you loved.
“You’re so pretty Sae,” you chimed in gently tracing his jaw and looking, then put your forehead against his then kiss the tip of his nose.”
Even when he had to wake up in the freezing dawn for practice, he would always stay and linger, staring down at your sleeping face, tracing your cheek before leaving a final, quiet press of his lips on your skin and a soft mumbled whisper of an “I love you.”
On lazy mornings, when the golden sunlight spilled through the curtains, painting fractured patterns across his bedroom floor.
While your bare body was buried beneath the linen blanket, you’ll feel his fingertips lazily tracing invisible lines along your back and your arm while silently pressing kisses.
While you were half-asleep, you feel his lips gently reaching your forehead.
“…Wake up.”
“Mmm…”you’d mumble, pulling the blanket higher.
“You’ve been saying five more minutes for twenty.”His voice was a low, gravelly rasp from last night.
“…Maybe I need another twenty….” You gently brushed him off. But the smallest smile—barely noticeable—would tug at the corner of his lips.
“You’re impossible.” While he tried to pull your body to face him, now both of you were staring at each-other.
“And yet…” you murmured, flicking his forehead with a grin, “…you still love me.”
He looked at you and said “I do.”
You giggled and flicked his forehead. He wince slightly, eyes narrowing, before leaning down to catch your lips again, pulling you into the warmth of another slow morning.
That was enough. You had him, and he had you.
You had met his family; his family was supportive and happy sae was alright. But then you had to meet his younger brother, Rin.
That…could’ve gone better.
The younger Itoshi just stared at you for several seconds before looking toward his brother.
“Why?” He questioned
You blinked while nervously chuckling,
“Why what?”
“Why are you dating him?” Rin said while pointing at sae. Sae just sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.
“Ignore him.”
“I wasn’t talking to you.”
Despite Rin’s hostility toward Sae, he slowly grew used to seeing you around. He’d never admit it outright, but he respected you. Rin
kept on contact with you. It was kinda obvious they cared for each-other—at-least—that’s what you think, but they grew distant and didn’t know each other anymor
Your own parents adored Sae. Your mother once watched him silently washing dishes after dinner before leaning over to whisper,
“You know…the guy you brought,” your mother trailed while she was busy cleaning the table while you were also helping you mom “ he looks intimidating…” she continued but smiled softly “…But he hasn’t stopped checking to make sure you’re okay all evening.”
“That’s a good catch,” while she jokingly bump her hips making you feel embarrassed by your mom’s teasing which just made her laugh loudly joking about how you always said that you won’t find a guy that loves you.
Then you looked over to find Sae already glancing in your direction, then you felt completely embarrassed that he heard that, which just made your mom tease you even more and drag Sae into it.
Marriage became less of a question and more of an inevitability the topic was always brought up.
It happened on an ordinary night while the two of you were lying together on the bed.
“You think we’d survive marriage?” you asked absentmindedly, tracing the veins on the back of his hand.
“We already live together.”Sae looked at your joined fingers, his grip tightening before he brought your knuckles to his lips.
“That’s not an answer.”You murmured, looking up into his eyes. And his gaze locked onto yours.
Then he lifted your hand, pressing a slow kiss against your knuckles.
“…We’ll get married.”
“…Promise?”
“I promise.”
There wasn’t a hint of hesitation, you believed every word.
And you believed him. You really did.
Looking back… Neither of you could remember when things started changing.
There wasn’t another person in the relationship, he didn’t betray you and there was no massive argument at all that ruined things—maybe.
It happened so slowly that neither of you realized your relationship was falling apart
The thing is football had always been Sae’s world.
But somewhere along the way… It also stopped making him happy…I mean you’ve been with him and always known he struggled but it was never that bad.
At first, the changes were so small you barely noticed them.
But it began with smiling less towards you and you noticed it whenever you’d see him watch the tv watching about people talk about him or the new match.
Whenver he was brought up and commented on he was silent, on social media there were many rude comments that were mocking sae with every miss and failed assist and him not living up to his name.
He’d apologize for canceling date nights because he was exhausted, promising to make it up to you “next week.”
Next week never came.
You started waking up in the middle of the night to find his side of the bed empty. While the balcony door would be cracked open.
Sae stood outside in the freezing air, hands shoved into his pockets, staring blankly at the city skyline.
“Hi, Can’t sleep?”
“…No.” he said while leaning down the cold metal railing.
“You should come back inside, come on it is bad for you sae to be out here so cold,” you murmured.
“…In a minute.” Sometimes that minute lasted until sunrise. Other nights he’d leave the apartment entirely. You’d wake at two in the morning to find a text.
Gone for a run, love you.
He’d return hours later drenched in sweat, breathing hard, claiming he just needed to clear his head. When you asked what was bothering him…
“…Nothing.”
Everything became nothing or fine.
You hated that word, “fine”.
Sae had a habit of just saying, “I’m fine.”
Training was fine.
Practice was fine.
The interviews were fine.
The pressure was fine.
The game was fine.
Our relationship is fine.
He was fine.
You hated it because you could see he wasn’t “fine” and damn it , you didn’t know what to do or say; whenever you wanted to say something to talk to him—he would brush you off and move along.
Dark circles settled permanently beneath his eyes, he started forgetting meals unless you reminded him.
Even when he did he would badely eat it to the point, that you’ll come home to find breakfast untouched or the dinner you was left exactly where you’d left it.
“…Did you eat today?”
“…I forgot.”
“You forgot?”
“I wasn’t hungry.”
You stared at him and nodded along while y you reheated his food anyway.
“…Sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize.”
“I know.” He muttered while he was hunched down on the seat.
“…Then why do you keep saying it to me sae?”
Silence. That’s because he genuinely didn’t know, why.
The truth was…He wasn’t ignoring you because he stopped loving you.
He was just exhausted and drowning into deep, And inside his exhausted mind, he had convinced himself that if he let you see how bad things had become… You’d only worry.
So he never talked to you about it and avoided every conversation, Unfortunately…he didn’t realize that shutting you was making things worse—but what could a person think when they were in that situation—but you still stayed right there next to him and soothe him or hug him whenever he couldnt sleep or when he cried.
He hated treating you like this,
It didn’t help that every disagreement between the two of you ended the exact same way.
Distance, he’ll distance from you and disappear for a while not talking to you.
It wasn’t that Sae wanted to hurt you—he didn’t know what else to do.
Whenever something upset him—whether it was the pressure of another match, the suffocating expectations placed on his shoulders, or the constant feeling that he had to be perfect—he would disappear into himself.
It was a habit that he convinced himself that isolation was the way for him, to keep his problems locked away, so that no one else would have to carry them or know.
Time had always solved everything before, hadn’t it? So he continued doing what he had always done.
He’d leave the apartment for hours without saying where he was going, returning long after midnight with sweat clinging to his skin from another punishing run.
Sometimes he wasn’t running at all.
He simply wandered the empty streets until dawn because the thought going home and you seeing him in this state would make you feel shit so he’ll leave and crash at some other place.
Other nights, he’d lock himself inside the bathroom, letting the shower run until the hot water turned cold, sitting against the tiled wall with his head buried in his hands.
The rushing water drowned out everything—his thoughts, the criticism, the expectations, the guilt.
It was easier than talking, it was always easier than talking.
Lastly it was better than letting you know.
As the months passed, he barely slept anymore.
You’d wake up at three in the morning, reaching toward the empty side of the bed only to find cold sheets waiting for you.
The balcony door would be cracked open, and there he’d be, standing outside beneath the pale glow of the city lights, staring into nothing
“…Sae?”
“…Couldn’t sleep.”
“Again? You’ve been barely asleep all week.”
“I’ll sleep tomorrow.”
Even on his days off, he couldn’t sit still. If he wasn’t training, he was running. If he wasn’t running, he was watching match footage.
If he wasn’t watching footage, he was staring blankly at the television without actually seeing what was on the screen.
Then the both of you started to argue more and more, it was…rare for the two of you to ever fight almost every week even over the little things.
“I’m trying to tell you how I feel, Sae.”
“I know.”
“No, you don’t,” you said, your voice cracking as you stared at his unreadable face.
“I don’t need you to fix it.” Sae replied He never knew what to say after that.
Whenever his team lost, he came home long after dark. You would hear the heavy thud of the front door. He dropped his kit bag, kicked off his shoes, and maintained that absolute suffocating silence.
He’ll walk straight past the living room and straight past you without a glance or a greeting.
He went straight to the bathroom. And the shower ran for nearly an hour. The first few times, you knocked gently on the foggy glass.
“...Sae? You okay?”
“...I just need time.”
One evening, after a brutal loss, he came home looking entirely drained. You had dinner waiting on the table. It had already gone completely cold.
“You’re late,” you said softly, trying to offer a fragile smile. “I saw the match today. I’m sorry about the loss.”
“I know.” He replied while not looking at you.
“Sorry I couldn’t attend, I had a meeting today,” you looked at him waiting for a response but it was complete silence,
“ I made dinner. Would you like to eat?”
He ignored the question entirely and just walked past you then into the bathroom for another hour-long shower.
You sat alone at the table, aimlessly moving the cold food around your plate as a heavy suffocation settled in your chest.
When the bathroom door finally opened, you stood up.
“Can we talk Sae?”
“I’m tired.” He kept walking toward the bedroom.
“I know you’re tired, Sae, but—”
“I said I don’t want to talk.”
Something inside you finally snapped. The years of neglect, the quiet rejection, and the loneliness of being in a relationship by yourself all crumbled.
“When do you ever want to talk. Sae stopped in his tracks, his shoulders tensing. “...What?”
“You come home, shut yourself away, and expect me to sit here and guess what is going on in your headl
“I don’t expect anything from you.” Sae said,
“Then what am I here for, Sae?”
Silence.
“I am so exhausted from dealing with you when you sulk and push me away,” your voice began to tremble violently. “God damn it, Sae... you treat me like a burden whenever you are like this. Every single time I’m telling you I’m right here ... you disappear.”
Sae turned around. His expression hardened.“But I never asked you to do any of that.”
The room went completely still. The air left your lungs. “...What?”
“I never asked you to carry my weight,” Sae said. His voice was entirely devoid of emotion,“I never told you I wanted you to reach out. You’re acting mediocre right now, trying to force your way in when I clearly told you I don’t need you. Some things I have to deal with alone. If you can't handle that, that's your problem. So just leave me alone.”
A bitter, breathless laugh escaped your lips. “...Do you even hear yourself right now?”
“I’m telling you the truth.”
“The truth?” You scoffed while tears finally spilled over your eyelashes “The truth is that I’ve been begging you to let me into your life, and somehow, you’ve made me feel like I’m the one asking for too much.”
Sae scoffed softly, turning his head away. “You’re being emotional”
The moment those words left his mouth, a flicker of regret crossed his eyes. He recognized the shift instantly.Your expression did not twist into anger or deep sadness.
Instead, your face went completely hollow with a look of total defeat. You wiped your cheeks with the back of your hand and forced a small smile.
“...That’s it,” you whispered, nodding to yourself. “I finally get it.”
“You don’t.”
“No,” you let out a trembling breath. “I do.” You walked into the bedroom.
Sae stood in the hallway, his jaw clenched, convincing himself you just needed space. But a few minutes later, you emerged carrying a single, heavy suitcase.
Sae’s composure finally shattered. He took a step forward. “...What are you doing?”
“I’m leaving.”
“...Don’t…please.”
It was the very first time he had ever used that tone with you. It was a plea. You looked at him, tears quietly tracking down your face. Your voice was dead and devoid of the warmth he had taken for granted. “It’s best this way, right? This is what you always do anyway. You always leave and it’s my turn—maybe, it’s for the better Sae.”
You walked to the front door and gripped the handle. You looked back one last time at the apartment, at the man who had promised to marry you under the covers.
“Goodbye, Sae.”
The door clicked shut behind you. Sae stood frozen in the center of the room for hours.
The apartment had never felt so vast. In the weeks that followed, it was obvious that you were gone.
You left behind things you did not need, like the expensive jewelry he bought you for anniversaries, all left neatly on the dresser.
He tried to store them away in boxes, but it did not help at all, he could not bring himself to hide or throw it away even your toothbrush from the bathroom sink.
Every night, the side of the bed next to him was freezing cold, and empty.
When he cane home there was nobody waiting for him, when he woke up he had no one to kiss and say “I love you.” He regretted it…and wanted to change.
Four years had passed.
His career flourished even more and was finally better—that’s what he thinks.
One spring afternoon, he absentmindedly scrolled through social media taking a break after another training session.
It was a mind-numbing habit he rarely indulged in, but he felt like he should check something, and then his thumb suddenly froze on the screen.
A familiar face appeared. It was yours.
You were dressed in a stunning, flowing white gown. And was standing beside a man he had never seen before.
The man's arm was wrapped securely around your waist. And your smile was radiant and stretched all the way to your eyes.
It was a genuine happiness he had not seen on your face in the final moments you spent together.
The caption beneath the photograph was: Congratulations to us.
Sae stared at the screen. His chest tightened‘Oh,’ he thought, his chest aching with a dull, hollow thud. ‘You look really pretty.’
And for the first time entirely outside of his control, a single, tear escaped his eye.
And splattered against the glass of his phone screen, blurring your happy smile.
･ ༝ ･ Rin Itoshi
You had known Rin Itoshi since the two of you were children, long before the sport of football had ever been introduced to his life.
Your mother was close friends with Mrs. Itoshi, and to their immense surprise, when both women found themselves pregnant at the exact same time, made them
incredibly enthusiastic to ensure their children grew up as best friends.
That was how the two of you were brought into each other's lives. Because you were born first, you were a tad bit older than Rin, and your absolute earliest memories of him were almost entirely ridiculous.
You distinctly remembered a tiny, toddler-aged Rin sitting flat on the living room floor of the Itoshi residence, happily chewing on one of his plastic toy blocks like a mid-day snack, while he kept of saying “rawr” acting like Godzilla.
Sae was sitting right beside him on the carpet, keeping a sharp watch to make sure his baby brother didn't accidentally choke on it.
You had been dragged over to the house entirely against your will, and your mother was forcing you to stay and play with the Itoshi brothers rather than allowing you to cling to her skirt like you wanted to.
You remembered walking over to the small boy, staring down at him with wide, horrified eyes before completely bursting into tears.
You were absolutely convinced he was a terrible, scary monster because he just kept aggressively chewing on the plastic blocks, and saying “rawr” so many times and when he casually reached out to hand a soggy toy to you, it triggered a massive crying outburst.
The adults in the kitchen had laughed hysterically at the interaction, while a young Sae became genuinely frightened by your sudden, loud explosion of tears.
Rin, on the other hand, had simply blinked up at you in complete confusion, still holding the wet toy block in his mouth while his hand remained reached out toward you, trying to share.
But from that chaotic day onward, the two of you became nearly inseparable.
Sure you were still afraid of Rin but little by little you started thinking that Rin was just weird…in an endearing way.
From those day on you were over at the Itoshi residence so often that it began to be your second home.
Playing with Rin was always fun, and many lazy afternoons were spent carefully building massive blanket forts in the living room, only for the entire structure to collapse within minutes, leaving all three of you kids falling asleep in a tangled pile of pillows beneath the sheets.
When football was finally introduced to Rin's life, It usually ended with you trying—and almost always failing—to convince Rin to focus on studying his schoolwork instead of spending every single hour practicing with his big brother.
Whenever he disappeared outside into the yard with a black-and-white ball tucked tightly beneath his arm, you were usually the one chasing after him.
“Rin! We still have math homework to finish!”
“…Five more minutes.”
“You said that twenty minutes ago!”
He would only offer a quiet shrug before kicking the ball against the goal again, leaving you grumbling under your breath and sighing.
As the years passed, absolutely nothing changed about the bond you shared.
You grew up together, standing on the sidelines at every single one of the Itoshi brothers' youth games, cheering loudly before coming back to their house to eat dinner with the family.
You were present at each other's birthdays, celebrating every milestone and constantly cheering each other on.
Then, everything changed. The day Sae came back from Spain was a horrible, it completely ruined the peace of the Itoshi household and fractured both of the brothers permanently.
You had never seen Rin cry the way he did after that brutal confrontation. His voice cracked terribly as while he tried to act like he was perfectly fine on the walk back, only for his entire composure to collapse the moment the front door closed behind him.
He didn't go to his parents for comfort, nor did he look for anyone else; he came straight to you.
He buried his face deeply against your shoulder, his chest heaving as he desperately tried to stop crying, while your arms wrapped around his trembling frame without a single second of hesitation.
You simply held him tightly in the quiet room, rubbing his back and murmuring soothing words until the tears finally stopped.
After that day, Rin changed completely. Little by little, he became much quieter, more distant, and walked around with a personal, bitter agenda that he always carried.
He never fully explained or said what had been spoken between them on the field; he just flatly stated that he and Sae were completely done. And he hated him.
Whenever he was down, he never explicitly asked for comfort or admitted that he was hurting, but he always found himself standing outside your front door after a long day, silently pulling you into a sudden hug right there on the porch.
He never admitted that he needed company, yet he would sit right beside you in your room for hours in complete, heavy silence.
He never said thank you out loud, but he didn't need to.
Rin knew that you understood him better than anyone else in the world.
It was a strange arrangement. The two of you never actually dated, and no one ever officially defined whatever is going on between you, yet everyone around you automatically assumed that you were already a couple.
Your school friends teased you endlessly about him, and the teachers paired the two of you together for projects without a second thought, fully expecting you to help him with his assignments since he was barely passing his classes due to his football schedule.
Even complete strangers on the street occasionally smiled fondly at the sight of the two of you walking home side by side.
Neither of you ever corrected them, because how could you explain that , when the both of you don’t understand what you feel with one another
It was best to not talk about it and continue walking.
You would be lying to yourself if you said you didn't have romantic feelings for Rin.
Because you did.
You carried those feelings in your heart for years. You wondered sometimes, if he felt the exact same way about you, but Rin had never been good with words, and you had always been far too afraid to ask and ruin what you had.
You blindly assumed there would always be more time, which was your biggest mistake.
By the time high school rolled around, Rin had grown significantly taller than you.
He wasn't the crying little boy who chewed on his toys anymore or was quite naïve , he became intensely quiet and intimidating, making the other people in your class actively avoid talking to him altogether.
If someone needed to ask him a question, they would track you down instead, begging you to ask him for them.
You heard the whispered comments about him almost every single day in the hallways.
“…He’s kind of scary.”
“…Does he ever even smile?”
“…Too bad, I’d totally date him if he wasn't so blunt and rude.”
Then, the classmates would stare directly at you, because they knew you were practically his person—their words, not yours.
Those comments always made you laugh quietly to yourself, because the harsh, angry Rin everyone else knew wasn't the real Rin that you knew.
Rin would unconsciously slowed his walking pace whenever you fell a few steps behind him on the sidewalk.
He was your friend that would silently take your school bag from your hand to carry it himself while walking home, wordlessly sharing one of his earphones so the two of you could listen to music together.
You knew the one who would hand you his umbrella the exact second it started raining, stubbornly refusing to share it just so he could walk home getting entirely soaked himself to keep you dry.
He was the one who frowned deeply whenever you skipped lunch due to studying, and would place a wrapped convenience store sandwich on your desk during the break before quickly turning around.
“…You forgot to eat again,” he’d mutter, “You always do this. Here. Eat.”
“Yes, sir!” you’d tease softly.
He’d roll his eyes in annoyance, but the faint, dark pink dusting the tips of his ears betrayed his true feelings every single time.
Moments like those became so ordinary and became part of your daily routine. Your classmates, certainly noticed the details.
“So…” one of your close friends whispered one afternoon, leaning across their desk with an amused, knowing grin. “When are you and Itoshi finally going to admit that you're actually dating?”
You nearly choked on your drink, your face heating up instantly. “W-What?”
“Oh, come on. You two always act like you're together. Practically everyone in the school thinks so. Why do you think we always ask you to go up to him instead of doing it ourselves?”
“You literally wait for each other after school every single day,” another classmate chimed in from the side.
“That’s only because we walk home in the same direction,” you defended weakly.
“He literally carries your bag for you.”
“ because he says thatI’m carrying too much weight.”
“He literally buys your lunch.”
“But I pay him back for it!”
“Oh yeah? Remember last week when you two were holding hands in the hallway?” your friend chided dramatically
“That was only because I was walking so slow and he was trying to drag me along!”
“Yeah… right. Keep telling yourself that.” The friend scoffed, before continuing in a more serious tone.
“And he completely glared a guy down yesterday just for asking for your phone number.”
Your heart gave a sudden, hard thud against your ribs. “He… did?”
“You seriously didn’t notice? Ugh, you are so entirely helpless. Can't you see that the scary Rin Itoshi actually likes you?”
You honestly hadn't realized it. When you glanced out the window toward the football field later that afternoon, you saw that Rin was already standing out there, watching you from the grass.
The exact moment your eyes met through the glass, he sharply looked away, shoving his hands into his pockets.
You couldn't help but smile.
It was completely normal, which was exactly why neither of you ever felt the need to confess your feelings out loud. Why would you risk changing things?
Nothing would change anyway; you already belonged to each other. Or, at least, that was what you blindly believed.
It wasn't as though either of you were entirely oblivious to the tension.
There were moments that lingered just a second too long to be considered to be platonic.
Sometimes you would catch him staring at you when he thought you weren't looking, or he would lightly brush his fingers against your cheek under the excuse of brushing away a stray eyelash, and his touch incredibly soft.
His eyes would soften ever so slightly before he realize you were staring right back at him.
Then, he would abruptly clear his throat, look away, and pretend he had been watching something else entirely.
“…What?” you’d ask, a smile tugging at your lips.
“You were staring.”
“I wasn’t. You were the one staring.”
“You’ve gotten much worse at lying.”
“…Shut up.”
Even his teammates eventually began to notice the undeniable attachment.
After Blue Lock and everything that followed, he became a highly aspiring professional football player with massive club deals and promises of international fame.
“You know,” Bachira once grinned broadly during a break, playfully nudging Rin with his elbow in the locker room, “they treat you way more like a boyfriend rather than just a regular childhood friend.”
Rin’s face immediately darkened into a harsh scowl. “Shut up.”
“What? I’m just saying the truth!”
“They’re not my girlfriend.”
“Oh?” Bachira tilted his head, his eyes gleaming with mischief. “But you didn't deny wanting them to be.”
Rin’s ears instantly flushed a deep, bright crimson. “Shut. Up.”
The entire locker room erupted into loud laughter at his rare display of embarrassment, while Rin glaring at every single one of them.
Later that afternoon on the walk home, he stubbornly refused to look you in the eye, keeping his gaze fixed on the pavement.
“…Did the guys say something to you during practice?” you asked curiously.
“…No.”
“They definitely did. Your face is red.”
“…Go away.”
Instead of actually leaving his side, you laughed so hard that you nearly lost your balance, having to lightly hold onto his forearm to keep yourself steady.
He let out a long, heavy sigh, but he didn't pull his arm away from your grip.
“…You’re so annoying.”
“But…” you trailed off, looking up at him.
“…you still choose to hang out with me every single day.”
“Yeah.”
“Why do you?” He was quiet for a very long time, long enough that you genuinely assumed he was just going to ignore the question and change the subject.
But finally, as the sun began to dip below the horizon, he spoke.
“…Because it’s you.”
Three simple, words.
Your heart gave a loud thump in your chest.
“…Oh…”
He never elaborated on what he meant. For someone like Rin Itoshi, that was practically a full love confession.
You couldn't stop smiling for the rest of the walk home, the warmth in your chest making you completely forget about the cold breeze.
You noticed the elderly couple watching the two of you from across the street.
The old woman gently nudged her husband's arm with a fond, nostalgic smile on her face.
“They’re so young,” she murmured.
“They’re entirely in love,” her husband chuckled softly, watching your retreating figures.
“They don’t even know it yet.”
“They will,” he replied knowingly. “They will.”
You wished the old man had been right
Because he wasn’t.
It never happened. Neither of you ever confessed your feelings, not because the love wasn't there, but because the two of you believed there would always be a tomorrow.
You blindly assumed there would always be another slow walk home , another birthday to celebrate, another afternoon forcing Rin to study, and another chance to tell him the truth.
Hubris was a funny thing and had a cruel way of ruining people before they even realize they are falling.
And life just kept on moving,
Football began to demand far more of Rin more and more. You were also busy in college trying to pass your classes and balance internships, research or part time.
Rin’s training camps that used to last a few days quickly stretched into weeks, and those weeks inevitably turned into months.
Your phone calls grew shorter, and the texts became less frequent until they stopped altogether.
Eventually, you stopped being the first person he called when his world spun out of control, and he stopped being the first person you instinctively searched for whenever you stood in a crowded room.
You simply drifted apart—slowly, until one day you looked across the gap and realized you no longer knew how to bridge the distance and he was too far too reach.
Years later, the massive stadium roared with applause of thousands cheering on and cameras flashing from every single direction.
It was just another victory, another interview coming up that he had to deal with and another award, that reminded him that he had successfully done it.
Rin didn’t care too much for it and he was a bit tired while his numb gaze simply wandered aimlessly across the endless sea of spectators in the stands.
Then, his eyes stopped. He saw you. At first, he tried to convince himself that his exhausted mind was just playing tricks on him, but it was unmistakably you.
You looked older, and undeniably happy.
There was that smile of yours that he hadn’t seen since the two of you were teenagers walking home beneath the evening sky.
You were laughing, but you weren't laughing with him.
You were laughing with someone else.
A man stood right beside you, leaning down closely to whisper something into your ear that made your smile widen even more.
Without a single thought, your hand found his, your fingers intertwining that it was obvious you were together.
The stranger smiled down at you the exact same way Rin used to imagine himself smiling at you one day, and you casually rested your head against his shoulder, looking entirely content.
Seeing you made Rin’s stomach twist in regret—all-consuming regret.
The crowd erupted into cheers once more as a staff member called his name from the tunnel, pulling him back to reality.
“Itoshi! You’re up!”
He blinked, almost as if waking from a dream. “…Yeah.” His voice was quiet.
He took a step toward the tunnel before instinct made him look back one last time.
His eyes found you immediately.
You were smiling.
It was a smile so warm, so carefree, so full of peace that it almost took his breath away.
You looked beautiful.
Beside the person you had chosen.
Beside the life you had built without him.
A small, bittersweet smile found its way onto Rin’s lips.
“…I’m glad,” he whispered, too quietly for anyone to hear.
“I’m glad you finally found someone who could love you the way you deserved.”
The words stung. Because inside him, he knew… He had wanted that person to be himself.
He turned away before he could look any longer, disappearing into the darkness of the tunnel as the roar of the stadium swallowed him whole.
But no matter how far he walked…inside the tunnel following the personnel who was escorting him .
His memories followed.
He remembered a tiny boy sitting on the floor of the Itoshi residence, happily chewing on colorful plastic toy blocks as if they were candy. And you bursting into tears because you were convinced he was some terrifying little monster, refusing to take the soggy toy he reached toward you with.
He remembered crying into your shoulder after Sae left for Spain and everything inside him fell apart.
He remembered every walk home.
Every quiet afternoon spent studying.
Every birthday.
Every promise.
And he remembered that day.
“…Because it’s you.”
Three simple words.
He had meant them with every part of his heart. But he had never found the courage to say the rest.
Because it’s you…
Because I always love you.
And I want to be with you.
Instead, he had convinced himself there would always be more time.
Tomorrow never came though.
As the tunnel lights stretched across the floor beneath his feet, Rin couldn’t stop himself from wondering…
Maybe, in another life—
One where he had been brave enough to speak, he would have been the one standing beside you.
Rin would have been the one making you laugh until your eyes crinkled at the corners.
Rin could been the one you came home to after long days.
The one who grew old beside you.
The one who kissed your forehead every morning.
Rin lowered his head with a faint smile that never reached his eyes.
“In another life…”
His voice disappeared beneath the deafening cheers echoing through the stadium.
“…I’ll be that guy.”
･ ༝ ･ Isagi Yoichi
You liked Isagi Yoichi. You liked him for longer than you wanted to admit, the both of you were in junior high when you first met, and you harbored a crush on him—always glancing and telling your friends hoe cute he looks whenever he embarrasses himself, but you kept those feelings tucked away in your heart because you never imagined he’d ever return them.
So when he confessed… You genuinely froze while hearing him speak.
His confession wasn’t some perfectly rehearsed confession beneath the falling cherry blossoms or a dramatic declaration in the pouring rain or with people that were surrounding you.
It was just…Isagi.
Standing in front of you, cheeks burning red, and nervously fidgeting with the sleeves of his uniform as he poured every thought in his heart out without holding anything back.
And a simple, “I really like you.”
And him stumbling over his proclamation and words over one another in his haste.
“I’ve liked you for a long time...” He laughed awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck. “…I don’t really know how to say this without sounding embarrassing.”
He took a deep breath.
“…I really like you.”
“…Would you…please…go out with me?”
For a few seconds, you simply stared at him.
Then…you laughed. Making his smile disappeared almost instantly.
“…Ah.”He rubbed the back of his neck again, forcing out a sheepish smile.
“…Sorry. I knew that was kind of sudde—” Before he could finish, you threw your arms around him. His entire body stiffened.
“…I like you too…”
Silence.
“…Really?” You nodded against his shoulder.
“I’ve liked you for a long time too.” He let out a shaky laugh before wrapping his arms around you, holding you so carefully, like he was afraid you’d disappear if he held on too tightly.
That day…the two of you began dating.
And for a while, it was everything you had ever dreamed of.
Isagi always made time for you, no matter how packed his schedule became.
He’d call you after training just to hear your voice, text you good morning before sunrise, and excitedly ramble for hours about football until he realized he’d been talking for twenty minutes straight
You never minded, you loved seeing him happy and seeing his dreams slowly become reality. But then those dreams grew bigger.
Every milestone pulled him a little farther from you, and every success demanded more of his time. Yet somehow… He still tried to make room for you. He’ll still call you when he was exhausted even if he was overseas . He’d stay awake after long flights just to ask how your day had been.
He’d apologize whenever practice ran late and missed a scheduled call with you.
“…I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize…Yoi.”
“Well I do and we’ll go out after this season, I promise.”
After this season. Those words became a promise you heard over and over again.
And every time one season ended… another promise began.
You never blamed him for not keeping up with the promises.
How could you?
This was everything he’d worked so hard for and whenever you see him celebrate his goals on the pitch you smile so brightly and wave at him only for him to notice and grin widely looking at you.
You were proud of him, more proud than words could ever express.
But a thought began festering in the back of your mind.
You started wondering if you were becoming another responsibility he had to carry, it made you more insecure and anxious about your relationship.
Were you another person he had to make time for.
You watched him fall asleep during late-night phone calls because he was so exhausted and could barely even speak to you that you had yo make up the incoherent words he was saying.
You watched him skip meals to squeeze in one more interview before flying across the world again.
You watched him smile and tell you he was fine, even when the dark circles beneath his eyes said otherwise and you’d hear him loudly yawn.
And instead of asking him to stay…you made the decision for him.
If loving someone meant wanting what was best for them. Then maybe…The best thing you could do…Was let him go.
Even if he never once asked you to.
You knew you were the one who was wrong.
At least…That was what you told yourself every night.
You regretted thinking this way, you were truly doubting yourself but you cannot stand seeing him be so happy and chase his goals, you’d just feel you’ll drag him down.
You regretted walking away from someone who truly loved you.
Someone who had never once made you feel like a burden. Someone who had spent years proving that you mattered.
But you still believed… He needed to let go.
Yoichi needed to stop holding onto something that might keep him from reaching the future he had dreamt so hard for.
Of course, if you told anyone that…
They would probably call you crazy. Your mother will definitely get mad at you and maybe won’t even let you live up to this brutal mistake of breaking up with him.
They would ask how you could leave someone like Isagi Yoichi.
How you could walk away from the person who looked at you like you were the most important thing in his world.
You certainly didn’t want to tell anyone, especially Isagi. Maybe you were unable to commit to the relationship
Because if you said it out loud…someone might tell you that you were wrong. And you weren’t ready to hear that.
You watched Isagi grow closer and closer to the dream he’d spent his entire life chasing. And whenever reporters asked him who had supported him the most…
His answer never changed.
“My family…”
“My teammates…”
“And my partner.”
Then he’ll smile towards the camera and the interview would end there.
The breakup happened on an ordinary afternoon. You had invited Isagi over after he finally returned from another overseas training camp.
The moment he stepped inside, you noticed how tired he looked. You were already sitting in one of the dining chairs, your hands folded tightly in your lap, trying to calm the nervous pounding in your chest.
His suitcase still rested beside the front door where he’d left it, proof that he hadn’t even bothered to unpack before coming to see you.
“You should’ve rested first when you got here,” you said softly.
Isagi looked at you, then smiled—that same warm, genuine smile that had always made your heart feel lighter.
“I wanted to see you, so I came straight here.”
For one brief moment, you almost stood up, and wanted to wrap your arms around him, and pretended the thoughts that had been haunting you for months had never existed.
Instead, you lowered your eyes to your trembling hands.
“…Yoichi.”
“Hm?”
“I think…” your throat tightened so painfully that the words almost refused to come out.
“…We should break up.”
The room fell completely silent. The happy smile slowly disappeared from his face, replaced by confusion.
“…What?”
“I’ve been thinking about it for a while.”
His brows slowly knitted together. “Why? Why on earth would you think that?”
You didn’t want to look him in the eye at all “You’ve worked so hard to get where you are.”
“I know.”
“And you’re only getting busier.”
“…Yeah.”
“You don’t need to worry about me anymore.” His expression immediately changed.
“What?”
“You should focus on football.”
“I am focusing on football,” isagi argued back.“I don’t want to become another responsibility.”
“…Responsibility?”
His voice lowered.“What are you talking about?”
“You barely sleep.”
“So?”
“You’re constantly traveling.”
“That’s just part of my job.”
“You cancel dates because you’re exhausted.”
“I always try make it up to you.”
“But you apologize for everything.”
He then hesitated before quietly replying,
“Because I feel bad.”
You looked away.“…Exactly why…I don’t want you to be with me.”
He stared at you like he genuinely couldn’t understand what you were trying to say.“…I’m confused.”
“You don’t have to keep trying so hard anymore.”
His face fell.“…Trying?”
“You don’t need to force yourself to make time for me.”
“…Force?”For the first time, he laughed, he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“…You think seeing you is something I force myself to do?”
Your chest tightened. “…Isn’t it?”
“No.” The answer came without even a second of hesitation.
He took a step closer. “Do you know what the first thing I do after every match is?”
You stayed silent.
“I look for my phone.”His fingers curled slightly at his sides.
“Because I want to text you.” Another step.
“When I score…”
“I want to tell you.”
“When I lose…”
His voice softened.
“I want you.”
Your eyes began to burn with tears falling down stinging as they began to roll on your cheeks.
“When I finally get a day off…”
“I spend weeks thinking about where to take you.”
He swallowed. “And somehow…”His voice cracked. “You’ve convinced yourself that you’re getting in my way?”
Tears blurred your vision.“…I just don’t want you sacrificing everything.”
“I’m not sacrificing anything.” Isagi remarked his voice also cracking and muffled crying were also heard.
“But you are yoichi, you are sacrificing time just to be with me. When you could’ve—“
He shook his head immediately. “The only thing I’m scared of losing…Is you.”
The room became unbearably quiet.
For one terrible moment, you wanted to believe hi’ and just hug him and let him console you, terribly wanted to forget every fear that had slowly taken root inside your heart.
You wanted to reach for him. “I think…”
You forced yourself to say, chocking on the words you were saying “…You’ll be happier without me.”
The look on Isagi’s face changed instantly, as though something inside him had shattered. “…Why?” His voice cracked.
“Why are you deciding that for me?”
You stayed still silently, “…because I’m scared for you.”
One day…I’ll be holding you back and I don’t want you to regret anything…I just want you to keep on going.”
“…I’m sorry…yoichi”
He stood there for a long time. Finally he nodded his head and wrapped his arms around you letting you cry onto him one last time.
“…If…” A weak, broken laugh escaped him.
“…If this is really what you want…” His hands clenched tightly “…Then I won’t stop you.”
It hurts Isagi saying that because he loved you and he loved you enough to respect a decision that was breaking both of your hearts.
As he reached the front door, his hand rested on the doorknob.
He didn’t turn around and look back at you,
“…I hope…” He paused. “I hope one day you realize…” His voice was quiet. “…You were never something I had to fit into my life.”
Another long silence followed. “…You were the life I wanted.”
The door closed softly behind him. That was the last time you saw each other as lovers.
At first, Isagi thought moving on would become easier if he buried himself completely in football.
He trained harder and slowly built the future he had always wanted just… without you.
Eventually, the ache inside him dulled he hadn’t completely forgotten and neither did it disappeared entirely.
But it faded enough that he stopped instinctively reaching for his phone after every match to send you a message and to the point that he had forgotten wanting to see your smile and hear your voice.
He became everything he had dreamed of becoming.
The world knew Isagi Yoichi as the football player who changed the game. A striker who never stopped evolving.
Yet, when he was all alone in his apartment , he still found himself wondering.
What if you had stayed?
What if he had noticed your fears sooner?
What if he had fought harder for you and made you stay?
The second time he saw you happened completely by chance.
Isagi had just finished another interview and was walking through the city, enjoying one of the few quiet moments he had away from cameras and expectations
Then… He saw you and your eyes met
The both of you didn’t utter a word or smile at each other, you two just completely stared at each-other other frozen in time while people were making their way.
You simply stared at one another from opposite sides of the sidewalk.
You looked just as surprised as he felt. There were so many things he wanted to say.
How have you been?
Do you ever think about us?
But the words refused to come and he didn’t even make a single move to reach out for you.
Before either of you could move, your friend looped an arm through yours with an excited laugh. “There you are! Come on, we’re going to lose our spot.”
Without realizing who was standing only a few feet away, they gently tugged you toward the bakery store that was beside you.
You stumbled slightly before glancing back over your shoulder.
For one brief moment…your eyes found his again.
A small smile appeared on your face and Isagi found himself smiling back.
“…Take care,” he whispered, though the words never reached you.
Then your friend pulled you through the bakery door, the little bell above it chiming softly as it closed behind you.
Isagi remained standing on the sidewalk for another few seconds, staring at the glass window where he could see you laughing with your friend inside, then walked away along side with the bustling crowd
･ ༝ ･ Reo Mikage
Reo came from a world completely different from yours. The Mikage family name had weight to carry . It was attached to wealth, influence, and generations of many expectations.
They were one of the most powerful families in the world, and from the moment Reo was born, his future had already been planned out for him.
Who he would become.
Who he would associate with.
Who he would eventually marry.
Everything had a purpose and it had to benefit to the family name, in no way would Reo’s family ever expect him to live down to the name.
And you… you were never part of that plan.
At first, Reo didn’t care and even went against his father’s whole speech about how it will be a disaster for him to stay with someone with a lower economical position.
Reo felt okay when he was with you, he was just Reo. Sure he’ll buy you things that you eyed, he’d like providing for you even if you tell him to stop, it was simply the way he wanted to show how much he loved you.
Reo always talked to you about the things that he liked and would always go on forever about football with genuine excitement, even though his family never understood why something so “ordinary” mattered so much to him.
They didn’t care about his dreams, they can support whatever he wanted.
Not really.
To them, football was a phase, it was just a hobby that wouldn’t last, they’ll let him continue playing but one of these days he’ll have to stop just so he can inherit the family name and responsibilities.
He’ll grow out of the phase, he hated having to deal with that but you were the person who believed in him
You were the one who told him he could chase something just because it made him happy. And for a while…Reo believed that was enough.
“I’ll convince them.”
He promised you one night, holding your hand tightly.
“I don’t care what they say.”
You looked at him carefully.
“Reo…”
“No.”His voice was firm.“I mean it.”
He looked very determined while making that promise to you ,“I’ll choose my own life.”
And you blindly believed him. Because Reo always made everything seem possible.
So you thought if anyone could stand against the Mikage family…It would be him.
But you underestimated how heavy expectations could become. At first, his family’s disapproval was subtle.
Comments during dinners.
Questions about your background.
Quiet reminders that someone like Reo had “responsibilities.”
They never openly insulted you.
They didn’t have to. The message was always clear. You weren’t what they envisioned for him. You weren’t someone who could help strengthen the Mikage name. You weren’t someone from their world.
It also included events where people from his circle would mock you or question you. It made you doubt and fear, but Reo would reassure you. It got to the point where his family gave you money to stop talking and interacting with him.
Reo found out immediately before they could pressure you into anything. You thought it would be like how common those rich and poor girl tropes were, and somehow you would make it out.
But slowly, the pressure started changing him. Reo began missing plans. He became quieter after family meetings. When he held your hand, he always seemed to start brushing it off. Whenever you asked what was wrong, he always gave you the same answer, I’m handling it.”
But you knew him. You knew when he was pretending. Still, you waited because he had promised, and because you loved him.
Then one day, the promise changed. “I think…” Reo stared down at his hands. “I think this is the right thing to do.”
Your heart sank. “Right thing?”
He did not look at you. “For both of us.”
“Oh.” You knew what he meant before he said it. It was a way for him to tell himself that leaving you was not cowardice. It was responsibility.
“I’m sorry.”
Those words just made you silent. Reo Mikage—the person who had everything—was apologizing because he could not give you the one thing you wanted. Him.
“No it’s okay, I just believed you Reo.”
His expression broke slightly. “I know.”
“You said you wouldn’t let them decide your life.”
“I know.”
Silence. There was no answer that would not hurt. Eventually, Reo looked away.
And that was when you realized. He was not choosing them because he wanted to. He was choosing the easier path.
It was the path where he did not have to fight and did not have to disappoint his family.
You understand the whole reason and weren’t afraid to let him go and be himself.
“Okay Reo, don’t feel bad I understand.” You hugged him tightly “thank you so much for everything.”
When you finally left, Reo did something that confused everyone.
He threw you a party. A huge one. It was the kind of extravagant celebration only someone like Reo Mikage could create.
There were beautiful decorations, expensive food, music, and your favorite flowers. It was a random party with nothing to celebrate, but he threw a party for you just so that you could see.
Everyone thought it was strange. A breakup party? Who did that? But Reo knew. He knew if he did not celebrate you, he would break.
So he smiled. He laughed. He acted like it was a normal goodbye. He gave a speech about how grateful he was to have met you, about how you changed his life, and about how you were the person who believed in him when nobody else did.
But everyone who knew Reo could see it. His smile never quite reached his eyes. Maybe it was a funeral instead of a party.
Years later, Reo would get everything his family wanted. He had the perfect image. If he had been a little braver, would you still be standing beside him?
Reo Mikage got everything everyone expected him to have. The Mikage family name grew stronger.
The businesses expanded even more and his reputation became exactly what his parents had always wanted.
He was the perfect heir, the perfect businessman, and the perfect representation of their family.
But ironically, the thing that made him happiest had nothing to do with any of that. It was his family
He had moved on and had a family of his own, being married to a wonderful person who supported him. He had moved on from you.
There were mornings when Reo would wake up to the sound of laughter echoing through his home.
And small hands grabbing onto him, demanding his attention before he had even finished his coffee.
There were messy breakfasts, toys left scattered around the house, and someone reminding him that he was supposed to stop checking emails during family time.
And every time, Reo would smile. This was the life he once thought he would never get to have. He was truly happy. He loved his family.
He loved the person beside him. He loved the life he created.
But sometimes, when the house grew quiet, his mind wandered. And somehow, it always went back to you.
He would practically laugh about how idiotic he was being back then with you, but he still felt hurt and knew he had really loved you. He wondered, where are you now?
The luxury hotel lobby was teeming with international business leaders, but Reo Mikage noticed you instantly.
You were standing by the floor-to-ceiling windows, holding a glass of champagne, laughing at something a colleague had said.
You looked older and more breathtaking.
Reo’s feet moved before his mind could stop them, his tailored suit clicking softly as he walked toward you.
“Excuse me,” his voice cut through your conversation, familiar and smooth.
You turned around. Your eyes widened slightly in surprise, but you didn't look afraid.
You didn't look hurt. You looked at him like an old friend.
“Reo,” you breathed, a polite smile gracing your lips. “It’s been a long time.”
“It has,” he replied, his heart hammering against his ribs shock to see that you were in-front of him, when yesterday he wondered where you could’ve been.
He took in the sight of you—the confidence in your posture, the sophisticated air you carried, the absolute lack of the doubt that used to plague you at his family's events.
“Well look at you, I’m guessing you finally got that job.”
“Yes, I did,” you laughed at the remark Reo made. “Thank you, I heard about the Mikage expansion in the European Market—Congratulations. Your parents must be thrilled.”
“They are,” he said, a faint, self-deprecating smile touching his lips. “They got exactly what they wanted.”
There was a brief, heavy silence between you. It wasn't the suffocating silence of your breakup, but the quiet acknowledgment of a lifetime that had passed between you.
“And you?” Reo asked, his voice dropping slightly, genuine curiosity bleeding through his businessman facade. “Are you happy?”
You smiled, and this time, the warmth reached your eyes completely. “I am, Reo. Truly. I have a wonderful life. I hope you are doing okay too, you shouldn’t feel bad about what you did—I truly understand why you had too.”
Before he could answer, a man stepped up beside you, casually placing a hand on the small of your back.
He didn't look like a billionaire, but his attire did seem like he was a worker, maybe a lawyer?
“Honey, the car is here,” the man said gently, before turning to Reo with a polite nod. “Hello.”
“Reo, this is my husband,” you introduced him, your voice filled with pride from introducing him to him.
Reo felt a familiar, thud in his chest, but it was quickly swallowed by a profound sense of relief.
He extended his hand, shaking your husband's firmly. “Nice to meet you. I was just catching up with an old friend.”
Your husband shook his hand back, “Nice meeting you Mr.Mikage, congratulations on getting ambassadors sign the contract for your company buisness.”
“Thank you Mr….?” Reo trailed of asking for his name, “Its Mr. Kagami, Mr.Reo”
“We should go,” you told your husband, before looking back at Reo one last time. “It was good to see you, Reo. Take care of yourself.”
“You too,” he whispered.
He watched as you walked away, your hand slipping effortlessly into your husband's as you exited the hotel.
Reo stood there for a long moment, watching the glass doors slide shut.
He wasn't heartbroken at all, he felt happy seeing you make it to your dreams.
Then he pulled out his phone, looking at a picture of his own children messily eating pancakes from that morning.
He smiled. You had both made it out of the trope alive.
You had both found your happiness.
･ ༝ ･ Oliver Aiku
Oliver Aiku was never the kind of person expected to settle down. Everyone knew his reputation—the endless flirting, the chaotic parties, and that slicked-back, effortless charm.
But Aiku loved you, you two first met at some random party you had been dragged to, where he immediately decided to hit on you.
You remember not wanting to give in but he made you laugh so much that night than you noticed his eyes falling in-love the more you laughed, you jokingly commented, “you have a way with words.” In which he just smirked and whispered into your ear, making you laugh once more.
One thing led to another and the both of you ended up dating eachother.
You knew his background, but despite his notorious past, before everything became official.
He completely stopped being a womanizer just to spend all his free time in his apartment with you, watching you lounge around wearing his oversized shirts.
You would sit on his bed, leaning your back against his broad chest while he softly hummed, absentmindedly playing with your fingers before leaning down to kiss you and dragging the blanket completely over your heads to hide from the world.
That affection was never the question or the problem of the relationship.
The real problem was that love simply wasn’t enough, especially when someone wasn't ready to grow up.
The pregnancy wasn’t something either of you had planned. It was unexpected and terrifying.
You were consistently taking your birth control pills, so a pregnancy scare was never supposed to be an actual problem, right? The reality of it was completely life-changing and it scared you to shit, your family reaction and especially Oliver’s.
The apartment smelled faintly of the rain outside, the dim afternoon light filtering through the blinds in dull, gray shadows.
Oliver had just come back from a grueling team training session, his duffel bag dropping onto the entryway floor with a heavy thud that made you flinch.
He was laughing joking about what happened in practice today, as he walked into the living room, his hair damp from the shower, completely wrapped in that, charm that usually made your heart melt.
But the moment his eyes landed on you sitting completely rigid on the edge of the couch and your leg was shaking from bouncing it up and down, his smile faltered.
You were holding a small plastic stick tightly in your hand, your knuckles white from the pressure.
You had been staring at it for an hour, your mind racing through a blur of multiple thoughts that were swallowing you, it was too late to get an abortion and about the birth control pills you never missed, desperately wishing the two solid lines would magically fade away.
“Hey,” Oliver said softly, his voice losing its usual playful lilt as he slowly crossed the hardwood floor.
He dropped to his knees right in front of you, his large, calloused hands gently taking yours to look up into your face. “What’s that face for? Look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
You couldn't even speak. Your throat felt entirely tight, blocked by a heavy wave of nausea and sheer panic.
Without a word, you loosened your grip and let the positive pregnancy test slide into his palm.
Oliver looked down at it. For a long, agonizing moment, the only sound in the apartment was the ticking of the wall clock and the steady patter of raindrops against the windowpane.
The confidence he always wore like a second skin completely vanished. His eyes widened, and his jaw tensing as he stared at the two lines, his thumbs trembling slightly against your fingers.
The guy who lived his life completely in control of his body and his choices in his life cannot, outrun or outplay what he is currently seeing.
“Are you… is this real?” he whispered, his voice cracking slightly as his teal eyes snapped up to meet yours.
He looked entirely pale, the reality hitting him like a physical blow. “But the pills—I thought we were safe.”
“We were supposed to be,” you managed to choke out, a hot tear finally slipping down your cheek. “Oliver, I’m scared. I am so scared.”
The panic in his eyes flared instantly, raw and suffocating, but he desperately tried to force his signature confident smile back onto his face.
He scrambled up onto the couch beside you, pulling you into his chest with a sudden, tight urgency.
He buried his face in your hair, his hands rubbing your back in quick, frantic motions as he tried to convince himself just as much as he was trying to convince you.
“I’ve got you,” he murmured, his heart hammering violently against your ear. “I’ve got you, babe. It’s okay. We’re adults, right? We can do this. I’ll figure it out. I’ll talk to the club, I’ll do better, I swear I will. I won't let you carry this alone.”
You leaned heavily against him, wrapping your arms around his neck, crying so loudly while he hold you tightly and kissing your cheek to soothe you. You desperately wanted to believe the promises he was whispering into your skin.
You wanted to believe that the man who loved you would stay right there in the trenches with you.
But even as he held you, you could also feel how terrified he was.
You could feel the underlying terror of a man who suddenly felt his freedom slipping away, a man who wasn't ready to be anyone's father.
And deep down, in the quiet spaces of your heart, you already knew that this was the exact moment the running began.
While you both were technically adults responsible for your choices, the sudden weight of the situation hit Aiku harder than he ever wanted to admit to you.
Because suddenly, he wasn’t just Oliver Aiku the famous football player—the guy who could freely chase whatever he wanted.
He desperately wanted to support you and grow as a person, but the thought of actually becoming someone’s father scared the absolute shit out of him.
He panicked.
At first, he made countless promises that he would change. He held you tight and swore that he would figure it out, do better, and step up to the plate. You wanted to believe him.
You really did, because this was the man you loved with all your heart, the same man who used to hold your hand tightly and tell you everything would be okay.
But promises only mattered when real actions followed them.
Aiku miserably struggled to keep up with the incoming reality, choosing to bury his panic in absolute silence.
He began to excuse himself from the house. Training quickly became a convenient excuse to stay away, and his football matches turned into an emotional escape. The late nights and the parties didn’t stop immediately either.
Every single time you confronted him about his absence, he would apologize over and over, promising that the next time would be different.
He would look at you with vulnerable eyes and admit that he was just terrified, that he had no idea what he was doing, and that he would get better.
But you couldn’t raise a newborn child on empty promises. You needed someone who would actually stay—someone who would stand by your side when things got difficult.
The absolute hardest part of it all was that you knew he loved your child.
You knew he did, deep down. But love from a distance didn’t change the fact that you were the one waking up alone in the middle of the night to soothe a crying baby.
You were the one learning how to navigate motherhood entirely by yourself. You were the one carrying the crushing weight of the responsibility because he simply wasn’t ready to face his fears. And having to deal with post-partum depression, plus people who kept on criticizing and mocking you.
Your family urged you and Oliver to tie the knot, they also didn’t stop with their passive remarks about your mistake.
Eventually, you stopped waiting for him to man up and start staying, it was best to let him go…you were tired of dealing with him. You stopped hoping that one day he would suddenly wake up and become the responsible person he kept promising to be.
You realized you couldn’t keep building a life around someone who kept running away from it. So, you left.
When you walked out the door, you made your boundaries entirely clear to him.
You told him firmly not to show his face to you, and not to come back crawling when he suddenly decided he was finally ready to be a father.
You told him that you would keep in contact solely for the child's sake, but warned him never to come back crying and begging on his knees to be a father and be a husband to you, you won’t let him.
Aiku remembered those parting words vividly because they cut him to the core. They hurt immensely because they were entirely true.
He had been the one who pushed you away. He had been the one who disappeared when things got real.
He had been the one who foolishly convinced himself that staying away was somehow protecting you both from his shortcomings.
But really, he was just a coward pathetic person, who was terrified of failing. Instead of facing that fear, he ran. And by running, he lost precious years that he could never get back.
Years later, Aiku saw his child. It wasn’t in person, but rather a simple family photograph posted online. It was a picture of you, your little girl, and another man.
Aiku stared at the glowing screen for a painfully long time.
Because right there, captured in a single frame, was the exact life he was supposed to have. It was the moment he was supposed to be a part of. His child was smiling brightly, looking incredibly happy and entirely safe.
It completely broke him to realize that his daughter was calling another man “Dad.”
Someone else had been there for all the monumental moments he had missed.
Someone else witnessed her very first steps and heard her first spoken words. Someone else got to celebrate the birthdays, soothe her on the bad days, and cheer for her on the good days. Someone picked her up from school and took her for ice cream.
Another man had stepped up to become the father he should have been.
Aiku understood that he fucked up and what his fear had cost him.
He had spent years running under the impression that he needed more time, more career preparation, and more proof that he could handle the pressure of fatherhood.
But life never worked like that, there’s no pause button. You had to choose and live with that decision you made.
The worst, most agonizing part of looking at the photo was that his daughter looked so much like him.
She had the exact same facial expressions, the same effortless smile, and the inherent his eyes including his charm. You texted him about how your daughter suddenly got many suitors with small boys offering letters to her but she’ll just ignore them and move on.
It made him laugh, hearing that.
She was a tiny, beautiful piece of himself that he had completely abandoned because he let fear win.
Aiku sat alone in the quiet room,
Then, his eyes caught the caption of the photo, and his chest tightened until he could barely breathe.
You had given her the exact name you used to whisper in his ear late at night when the two of you were still tangled in his bedsheets.
Back then, he would playfully argue with you, teasing that your first child was going to be a boy, but you would always laugh and remind him that your family was known for having girls first.
Seeing that name under the photo—and seeing another man stepping in to live out the exact future you had dreamed of with him—hurt more than any loss he had ever faced on the pitch.
Written by Jammy. Please do not copy and paste or feed my work into an AI. This was completely written by hand, thank you for stopping by and reading!
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And I knew you'd haunt all of my 'What-ifs - Cardigan
Sae itoshi x reader
Part 1
A/n:- i had a whole ass dream after hearing to cardigan by Taylor. So i decided to write it down. It is a long fan fic for me to finish it in one shot so I will probably write a part 2 or maybe 3? Idk if I should make the ending happy or sad tho because I woke before the confession part 😔.
I just realised I can make sae suffer in this fan fic by making him realise that he can't really get the love he wants because of his life.😋🤭 could be really nice revenge for he did to rin
And I knew you'd haunt all of my 'What-ifs - Cardigan
Sae itoshi x reader
Part 1
A/n:- i had a whole ass dream after hearing to cardigan by Taylor. So i decided to write it down. It is a long fan fic for me to finish it in one shot so I will probably write a part 2 or maybe 3? Idk if I should make the ending happy or sad tho because I woke before the confession part 😔.
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My phone was broken so I wrote down like 2 fan fic for sae and rin (separately) containing like 8-9 pages In my free time now idk i should post those cuz they are genuinely so long i don't think people will read it 🥀
PSG STAR JULIEN LOKI IS CAUGHT LOOKING HEAD OVER HEELS WHILE ON A ROMANTIC OUTING IN PARIS WITH PARTNER [NAME] [LAST NAME]!
That video of a private moment you and loki shared at a Paris restaurant three days ago has been seen by millions of people in less than a day, and your boyfriend is still not quite sure how to feel about it.
Loki knew that his status and fame would eventually lead to him losing his right to privacy in the eyes of the public, but he didn’t know he’d also lose the ability to go on a date with his partner without having to worry about people being weird and recording him when he’s lost in conversation with you — So lost that he didn’t even register when he started to giggle at one of your jokes. Or how him not being able to hold eye contact with you for too long before feeling his lips twitch into a smile again made him look like a lovesick fool.
His personality does a complete 180 whenever he’s with you and he’s only being made aware of it now. Alongside millions of other people on twitter…How amazing.
And it's not like he has an issue with people seeing him be affectionate with you. You're his partner and it’s only natural that he feels comfortable in being julien instead of loki the prodigy and star of the french team while in your company.
But why did the paparazzi — or whoever it was that recorded that damn video — have to catch him when he’s acting all giddy? He has a reputation to maintain for goddess sake! And he doesn’t appreciate how nonchalant you’re being about this…
“I don’t think it’s that bad, Jules” You’ve been saying this for days and he hates to disappoint you, but it’s not helping. like at all. But of course you’d say such a thing since you’re not the one being flooded with countless dms poking fun at how “down bad” you are. “ I bet they’ll forget about this next week.”
“Still…” he sighed. “I don’t like it when people invade our privacy like that.”
“I think what you don’t like is that people are seeing right through your ‘suave guy facade’ actually.”
He scoffs at your response, because he can’t really refute it. “Whatever...”
“They’d be surprised to know that you act worse when we’re alone.”
“I do not?”
“You do Julien, stop lying…or you want me to post video evidence of it?” He quieted down really quickly after that. Because if by “video evidence” you mean that stupid recording you took of him smiling in his sleep while napping on your chest, then he’ll rather put his pride to the side and be quiet than give people more proof that even a man like him has his weaknesses.
And that his biggest one just happens to be you.
an — as soon as i saw this vid of mbappe i got inspired to write this lool. and i know deep in my heart that loki secretly likes being the little spoon most of the time cus having your arms around him makes him feel worshipped so just trust me on this bro. also this feels ooc to me....but wtv..... fuck it ig.
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