Randomness From A Skype Group Chat  {Sentence Starters}
ââ I am trash Satan. ââ
ââ Only ten alcohol per hour.ââ
ââ Hello, jazz-hater. ââ
ââ Erase your own existence. ââ
ââ Stop leaving, you little punk. ââ
ââ Fuck you, Uncle Shady. ââ
ââ I JUST WANNA MAKE PUNS ââ
ââ Thatâs all he learned in juvie: how to fuck someone back to life. ââ
ââ How have you seen my ass? ââ
ââ Oh man, Iâd love to die! ââ
ââ Bitch, Iâm gonna smear blood on your motherfucking macaroni. ââ
ââ I feel like my cat is judging me right now. ââ
ââ When did wishing to die become such a casual topic in here? ââ
ââ Iâm indifferent to cheerios. ââ
ââ Dying requires effort, for fucksâ sake. ââ
ââ MURDER IS PLANNED ââ
ââ Just laugh, Iâm laughing about it now. I mean at the time I was crying, but Iâm laughing now. ââ
ââ Reasons people should date me: there are no reasons, stay far away. ââ
ââ If Hagrid and Weird Al had a love child⌠it would be you. ââ
ââ Hey, bitch, tell me about your fourth cousin Jenny. ââ
ââ OMINOUS KAZOOING ââ
ââ Stop it, youâre gonna trigger T -Bag. ââ
ââ My arm is half-black. ââ
ââ You look like a shady drug dealer. ââ
ââ One time I was at the dentistâs office and this hot dude came in and my first thought was actually âDEATH STAR APPROACHINGâ. ââ
ââ My hair looks like Sonic the Hedgehogâs deformed pink cousin has been run over by a truck and used as a toupee. ââ
ââ Just take out the middle man and just die. ââ
ââ Screw joint weddings, hello joint funeral. ââ
ââ You might need to get me a bigger coffin. ââ
ââ I PUT THE ASS, SASS, AND SIN IN ASSASSIN Â ââ
ââ Would prison really be that bad compared to your work? ââ
ââ ITâS A MOTHERFUCKING DUCK I WILL STAB A HOE ââ
ââ I can die happy and in toasted cheese heaven. ââ
ââ I did not subscribe to bible meet ups. ââ
ââ I speak no bullshit, my potato friend. ââ
ââ Watch dumb teenage singing with me, yaâll. ââ
ââ Yeah, no fluff in Prisneyland. ââ
ââ She is a sad smol murder bird and needs to be loved. ââ
ââ If I had feelings, Iâd be offended. ââ
ââ Weâre not naming our son Bear. ââ
ââ Shit, how do I go home and tell my wife that our adopted kid got eaten. ââ
ââ Give me your disorder, Iâll take it off your hands for you. ââ
ââ Murder is fun. Itâs cheaper than divorce. ââ
ââ This is fox-kidnapping. Put the fox back. ââ
ââ The snail fucked off. ââ
ââ DAMN YOUR HOT SHADY ASS ââ
ââ STOP BEING LEPRECHAUN RACIST ââ
ââ I am going to murder myself with a kazoo. ââ
ââ Does Britain have its tea? Find out next week. ââ
ââ I leave to eat some goddamn bbq ribs and there is hell. ââ
ââ Youâre about as angelic as Lucifer, donât fool yourself. ââ