My Dreams And Dark Fantasies

“I know, boy! It was hard for you to understand that your ejaculations had to be reduced in their frequency. Hard training was needed to reduce the release intervals. Before we settled our relationship, you have been a daily wanker. Yes, I know you told me that during puberty you have jerked yourself off three times a day. For many months at the beginning of our relationship you were allowed to ejaculate 3 times a week. But even during this time you cheated me with additional cumshots. Then we started with chastity rules and you have been locked in a chastity device. From that point, your behavior improved significant.”

“Cheating was still possible. I needed to be very creative in defining rules for bondage and chastity. You know the rules. They are all part of the chastity contract you have signed two years ago. Since that day, you have to wear rubber 24/7 and be locked in a steel chastity device with no possibility to touch your cock or balls. When the chastity device has to be removed for cleaning reasons, you are always in strict bondage and blindfolded for the whole cleaning procedure. So, you even have not seen your cock the last two years. Your cock belongs to your daddy and I was the solely decision maker about your cummings. We reduced your ejaculations to one per month.”

“A prerequisite for a monthly release session is a 36 hours’ bondage session in the cage with cock ball training and recurring edging procedures. The release sessions are performed according to the strict session rules and are very professional meanwhile. The rules ensure that your whole body is encased in rubber and leather before it will be prepared on the leather padded release session table and ends up in immobile bondage. I have to mention that your ass is always plugged and your mouth is gagged with an inflatable gag during the session. Before you finally allowed to ejaculate a prolonged edging procedure goes ahead.”

“Between the monthly release sessions your behavior makes me really proud of you, boy! But I always notice a lack of eagerness during the training immediately after the release sessions for a period of about one week. This cannot be accepted! I had a really long discussion with my friends and other masters about the possibilities to solve this problem. After weighing all the pros and cons I finally came to the conclusion that a release by ejaculation is not needed for my boy any more. The ejaculation is an indicator for the intense of a penile stimulated orgasm and this kind of orgasms are not good for a boy.”

“What does that mean for you now, boy? You´re locked in your cage for 36 hours and you expect that your monthly release session is started soon. But that will not happen. The release sessions have to be renamed to enforced bondage sessions, because I will keep them as they are according to the strict rules with the only difference that the final release is never proceeded any more. The new enforced bondage sessions additionally will be moved a little bit forward in time and your 36 hours’ bondage session in the cage is extended with a milking session.”

Ways to Tease Him

Tease Your slave to get him to the point where he’ll “Do Anything to please You”

Make him strip naked while You keep Your clothes on.

Have him kneel before You and kiss Your feet.

Have him address You as ‘Mistress’

Have him kiss Your ass…make him beg to kiss Your ass.

Tie his hands and have him undress You with his mouth/teeth.

Don’t let him masturbate or touch his cock without Your permission at any time.

Tie his hands behind his back. Have him kneel with knees spread naked in front of You while You read or watch TV, occasionally nudging his balls or penis with Your shoes.

Either order him to stay erect, or don’t give him permission to have a hard on… either way, punish him if he fails!

Use some strong string (kite string), tie a slip noose in the end and tighten it around the head of the penis, tug on it, pull it shake it, lead him with it, whatever You please.

Show Your slave Your panty crotch, make him smell it, but no touching without permission.

Tie Your slave spread eagle to the bed and tease him for hours. Make sure he has a big hard on, but once he does only touch it when he needs just a little more encouragement, don’t let him cum.

Put on his favorite lingerie and tease him with Your beauty.

Scratch him with Your finger nails.Tickle him. Pinch his nipples.

Sit on his chest and find out what he would do to be allowed to kiss Your nipple. Let him almost kiss it but pull away, make him beg.

Take a break, put some worn panties over his face and leave the room for a while and let him think about what else You might do.

Squat above his face, make him reach with his tongue to taste the crotch of Your panties…get more promises

Blindfold him and make him lick You to several orgasms. Take a break, cum back and do it all again.

Rub his face against Your pussy or sit on his face, but gag him with Your panties or a gag so that he can’t lick You.

Tie his balls off to something behind him so he has to tug on them to smell Your panties or kiss Your ass…stay just out of reach.

Masturbate in front of him. Use a dildo or a vibrator.

Put the base of the dildo in his mouth and make him satisfy You with it. Do it so his nose presses between Your ass cheeks. He’ll be Your little brown noser and love it.

Make him lick the dildo clean.

Tie him down to the bed and tie his hands to his penis but do not give him permission to cum with harsh punishments for disobedience.

Put Your worn panties over his head so he can smell your odor.

Make him wear a cock ring (a watch strap or cat collar works well)

Ways to Humiliate Him

Make him wear Your panties or lingerie, dress him up as a little girl or a French maid.

Make him do housework naked or dressed in women’s clothes.

Have him pamper You, have him:

give You a foot/back/full body massage

give You a pedicure/manicure,

paint Your finger/toe nails.

bathe You/shave your legs.

cook and serve You a nice dinner.

Make him hand wash Your panties and lingerie.

Make him polish Your shoes with his tongue.

Make him wear a collar and lead him around with a leash, like a dog.

Attach a leash to his balls or cock ring, and lead him around with that.

Tie it off in front of the sink while he does the dishes.

Ride him around as Your pony boy…spurs? a riding crop?

Dress him up like the slut that he is, wear a strap-on dildo and make him beg to suck it. fuck him. (don’t forget the fuck-me red lipstick!)

Make him wear Your panties or lingerie under his regular clothes when he goes out or goes to work so that he will think of his Mistress constantly.

Make him masturbate for You, make him beg for permission to cum, don’t let him, punish him if he does.

Make him screw himself with a dildo.

Make him earn his rewards; for example:

Allow him to kiss Your ass after the dishes are done.

1 minute of pleasure for him for 10 minutes of Yours. 5 minutes of pleasure for him after he makes You cum 5 times. Spank him 10 times for each minute it takes him to make You cum.

If You think he’s earned an orgasm, make him cum on Your feet or Your ass and then make him lick You clean.

Order him to bring himself to the edge of orgasm and stay there until You give him permission. When You give the command he must cum within 5 seconds or he will be punished and/or not allowed to cum at all. (keep him that way for 30 minutes, an hour…or as long as You want)

If he’s really horny and bothering You, You may want to curb his interest by ordering him to jerk off 5 or 6 times in a row. Use it as skin conditioner… 3 times on each foot, have him spread it around and lick them clean after each time.

Always make him lick You clean after sex.

When You go out, order him to tie himself up, be naked or dressed up as a girl and be kneeling at the door for when You arrive.

Lock a padlock on his balls.

Give him a golden shower.

Make him think of a new way for You to humiliate him. Punish him if You don’t think it’s good enough. Make him post it to the net (and send it to me to add to the list)

Ways to Discipline and Punish and Torment Him

Spank or whip him. (wooden spoon, hair brush, belt, ruler, ping pong paddle, riding crop, switch, cat-o-nine tails…)

Tie him in an uncomfortable position.

Tie his ankles together and attach his balls to them.

Hog tied. (wrists and ankles tied together)

Hanging from the ceiling by his wrists.

In a chair with his knees pulled up to his shoulders – good for spanking and everything is exposed and vulnerable.

Tie up his balls and cock with a long leather thong, clothes line, or boot lace. Use a long piece, and wrap the base and balls repeatedly. Do each ball separately. Tie tight loops around his shaft from base to tip then tie the end off back between his legs and up to a belt or to his handcuffs.

Make him wear a chastity belt or cock cage.

Attach clothes pins or nipple clips to his nipples, balls, cock or wherever.

Put a butt plug in his ass. Or get out the strap-on.

Enema.

Double up on his domestic chores, make them more difficult: tie his hands; make him use a toothbrush to clean the toilet, tie his ankles with a short chain and make him wear extra high heels.

Deny him orgasms for a long period of time.

Have him lick You clean after you pee.

Put Ben-gay or icy-hot on his penis and nipples.

Drip candle wax on him.

Make him do exercises (jumping jacks, leg spreads, squats, aerobics, yoga…)

Have you ever wanted something, like a bouquet of flowers, a present, or even a surprise night out? How do you go about telling someone that you want them to surprise you and, yet, it still be a surprise? Think about it for a moment. If you tell your hubby that you want him to surprise you with a bouquet of flowers and the very next night, low and behold, he brings home a beautiful bouquet. Be honest. Was it really the surprise you hoped it would be? Or was it more a let-down because you just told him what you wanted. The surprise was gone, wasn’t it? And the fun right along with it…

Well, there are things your partner would love for you to do, but… (And here’s the rub) he cannot tell you what they are. If he does, it would simply not be as much fun or exciting when you do it. It’s kind of a conundrum. If he doesn’t tell, you may never think of it on your own, or you might think he wouldn’t enjoy that sort of thing, so you won’t want to push him into it without asking first. But then, asking ruins it too…

So how can he tell you what he wants you to do to him, if he can’t come right out and say it? There is only one sure way I know of. Fantasies! You, as his Mistress (or whatever you call yourself), must pay close attention to the fantasies he tells you. Or, if it is you telling the fantasy, pay attention to the things he says he finds erotic. It’s really that simple…

But the main thing to remember is that you are the one who needs to pay attention when he tells you a fantasy and when you tell him one. Okay, maybe you are not big on telling fantasies, but you can certainly find a story or two for him to read, can’t you? That’s all it takes. Understanding what your subby-hubby enjoys is up to you. He can’t tell you…

My recommendation? Have him read a lot of stories and tell you what he likes best in them. Then you can surprise him sometime by doing one or more of those things.

Mistress-Marlene

Tips for New Dominants

1. You will fuck up. New Dominants WILL make mistakes. It’s a fact of life. To be fair, experienced Dominants will make mistakes. Intermediate Dominants will make mistakes. If you are a Dominant or think you want to be a Dominant, you will make a mistake.

Accept it and move on.

The only thing that makes a mistake worse is not learning from them. Use them as opportunities to grow and learn. Talk to people about them. Figure out what went wrong then incorporate that and try not to do it again.

If you act like everything you do is perfect and without flaw, then you are an idiot and whoever plays or submits to you will also be an idiot. Because none of us are perfect. But what we can do is try to learn from the mistake and improve our skills.

2. Beating someone does not make you a Dominant. Any idiot can be taught how to use a flogger, cane, crop, do rope, punch, kick, etc. The list goes on. Simply because you have become adept at kicking someone’s ass is not the mark of a Dominant. At best, it makes you a Top. For the record, there is nothing wrong with being a Top. But not every Top is a Dominant. For many people, they are completely different terms.

There is much more to being a Dominant than simply engaging in play. Do not confuse with what happens in a scene as an overall relationship role.

3. Ask questions. Ask as many questions as you can of who you can. For every pompous jackass out there who thinks they are too good to help out a new person, there are several more who are more than willing to assist new Dominants. You can learn something from almost everyone, even if it is what not to do or what you don’t want to do. The more questions you ask of individuals the more informed you will become. And don’t limit yourself to just Dominants. There are submissives and slaves out there with a wealth of experience and knowledge who you can draw from as well. Their knowledge is just as valid as a Dominants, so talk to them.

4. Be realistic about who and what you are. If you give yourself a title such as Sir or Master or Mistress and you have only been in the scene a few months, prepare to be mocked and laughed at. Seriously. It’s not cool. Now, of course, you are free to refer to yourself in any way you see fit. Likewise, people are free to respond in a way that THEY see fit. If you are 26, 36 or 56 years old and have only been involved for 3 months, perhaps calling yourself MasterTony isn’t the best idea. And expecting people to refer to you as such probably isn’t going to fly.

Understand that there are people who go years before attaching a monicker to themselves or before the community gives them that title. Respect that. Don’t make a mockery of their time and energy simply because you thought it would be cool to add Master or Mistress to your name. Especially if you aren’t one yet (emphasis on yet — because who knows, it very well could happen).

5. Just because you saw someone do it, doesn’t mean you can. So you went to a private play party or went to a demo and saw someone do something really cool and interesting. The person doing it made it look so easy that you are sure, with your vast intelligence, that you can do it as well, right?

Wrong!

The reason they made it look easy is because probably they’ve been doing it for a while. They’ve had a bunch of practice and have studied it. They didn’t just decide that one day they would punch someone in the crotch without looking into all of the things that go into that punch.

So when you see something cool that you want to try, refer to item #3. Ask the person questions, provided their scene is over or maybe at the conclusion of the demo. If they are giving a demonstration, then they are there to answer questions, so ask them and make sure you figure out how to do that cool thing before you try it.

6. Real Dominants eat pussy. Real Dominants suck cock. The notion that Dominants don’t or shouldn’t perform oral sex is one of the most ridiculous ideas that has been around. As if the mere act of putting your mouth on someone’s genitals denotes Dominance or submission. Dominants can take it up the ass too. It doesn’t matter. Sexual acts do not define a Dominant. The mind does.

7. Not all women are submissive. Not all men are Dominant. If you believe that, I’d like to introduce you to a few people who will bear personal testimony to that. Do not default to the notion that scene orientation is defined by gender. It’s not and your time in this lifestyle, especially if you interact with the public scene, will be a lot easier if you accept and incorporate that fact into your psyche.

8. Honor someone’s relationship dynamic. Many people have many different dynamics and protocols in this lifestyle. When in doubt, revert to Item #3. But when made aware of them, do not dismiss them simply because you think they are silly. In reality, they may be. But if you are or want to interact with individuals who have a certain dynamic/protocol, there are only two options. Either honor it to associate with them or don’t deal with them at all. Since that is what they have decided for themselves, your opinion will have little or no impact, so complaining or whining about it will do nothing. One day you may develop dynamics or protocols that others may find strange. Think how you would want to be treated in that situation and then behave accordingly. It’s funny how there are those who will ask to touch someone’s toys but think they can treat someone’s partner however they want. A bit weird.

9. Not all slaves are submissives. Some Dominants do bottom. There may come the time when you run into a really, REALLY sadistic person. Every now and then, you will find out that said person may actually be a slave. There are some slaves who put the most sadistic Dominants to shame. Trust me on this one. But don’t judge.

You also may see or read an account of a Dominant who likes getting flogged or caned. Don’t be surprised. And don’t judge.

You may discover that you may enjoy the feel of a flogger or a cane. If that is what you like, go for it. It will NOT diminish you, except in the eyes of the petty people.

For some people, things can be more fluid then one is lead to believe. A Dominant can get the crap beat out of them and still remain a Dominant. It’s not always the play that matters. It’s the mindset. There are times when some things are just physical. It’s the way the scene works at time.

10. Dominant =/= Sadist. Not every Dominant is a Sadist. Not every Dominant enjoys causing a great deal of pain. Not every Dominant wants people in a pile of subbie goo.

11. Don’t measure yourself by someone else. You have to develop your own style. You have to what makes you tick and why. Don’t do things just because someone else is doing them or it seems cool or because the hot little potential sub is really begging for it. If it’s not for you, it’s not for you. People are best at what truly inspires them not because of what is cool and hip. While, like high school, there is peer pressure in the BDSM scene/lifestyle, you have the choice as to whether or not you follow it, or follow your own path.

12. Keep an open mind. There are things as a new person that you do not like that in 2 or 3 or 10 years you will totally be into. Be sure to try out and learn about different things. You never know what turns you off today will totally rock your socks tomorrow. So keep an open eye and an open mind. It will work to your benefit in the long run.

13. Question yourself. A Dominant who doesn’t question themselves isn’t much of a Dominant. One of the tricks to being a good Dominant (if you are interested in such a thing) is looking and re-examining your actions as a Dominant. Figure out what you did and why you did it. The answers will not always come easy and they may not always be pleasant. But self-awareness and introspection are two crucial tools in a Dominants play box. Use them and use them often.

14. You can’t learn everything over the internet. The Internet will NOT teach you how to be a good Dominant. It will barely teach you how to be a good Top. The Internet is filled with tons of really good information. It’s filled with a bunch of stupid shit too. You cannot teach yourself everything. This is a common misconception. Because, how can you teach yourself something you don’t know? Seek out others who are experienced and if you are so inclined, find a mentor. If you don’t want to find a mentor, establish your own “tribe” (i.e., group of friends). Use them as a sounding board and an advice corner. Get information from as many different people as you can, then make it your own. Do not rely on sites like FetLife for your information. There is a lot more to this stuff than will ever appear on Fet.

15. Be honest about your experience. If you’ve been involved in BDSM for 10 years, but 9 of those years have been online, be honest about that. Don’t lie about parties, clubs, dungeons, or events. Be honest about your experience, or lack thereof. You will gain more respect from others that way and it will also accelerate your ability to learn. It will also potentially draw the more experienced to you if you don’t pretend that you know everything already. One thing about the lifestyle is usually, a honest and experienced person, Dom or sub, can smell bullshit a mile away.

16. Try to figure out what type of Dominant you want to be and work. As mentioned previously, there are many types of Dominants. What type you will be will be up to you. But when you find a style that fits, run with it. Endeavor to be the best you can be by learning as much as you can about that particular style, infusing your own style along with it. And don’t be afraid to switch gears when its not working for you. After all, this is your journey and your path. You are responsible for it.

17. Switches are not confused. This is an old adage. Switches are no more confused than bisexuals are. If you can accept the notion of a bisexual person, you can accept the notion of a switch. You may not understand, you may not get it or you may not be comfortable with the notion of a switch. Who cares? If you’re not a switch, then it doesn’t mean anything. But switches are a part of our community and their role should be respected just as much as you want yours respected.

18. Never trust a big butt and a smile (or tits or cock). Since the dawn of civilization, a pretty or handsome face has been the downfall of many people. Don’t be one of them. Sure it’s easy to find someone so physically attractive that that is all you see. But remember, people are more than their physical appearance. Just because you like big tits or a big cock does not mean that should be the primary motivating factor. If you want a relationship, then go for that — and hope that the person you are in a relationship actually does have the big tits or cock of your dreams.

19. Not everyone has to submit to you. You are not everyone’s Dominant. Not everyone has to call you Sir or Ma’am or bow down and kiss your ring (or boots). That type of deference comes with experience and proving yourself. Just because you see yourself as a Dominant, doesn’t mean everyone else will. Treat submissives in a manner that shows basic respect and consideration. Don’t allow yourself to get Domlier-than-thou and think you can run rough shod over someone else. Others have a choice and they have the right to exercise that choice. You cannot make a decision for someone else that you are not in a relationship with.

How To Control a Sub

The following is a list of things that you should be doing. Not everything will apply in every case, and there may be things not on the list that work for you.

1. You must absolutely take total control of his orgasms!

You must get him to wear a chastity device of some kind.

You should put it on him yourself and only you should hold the key.

Let him out at your discretion only and only for teasing or release.

2. Control your own feelings of guilt.

He should never be permitted to have any kind of orgasm without your permission.

If you feel he deserves an orgasm… Ruin it!

Remember, you can ruin several orgasms a day, but he can only have one full one.

Full orgasms should be for very special occasions (no more than 3 or 4 per year).

3. You must get into his head!

Learn his fantasies and what turns him on.

Tease him with your words whenever possible.

Find out what humiliates him.

Use his humiliation whenever possible.

4. You must keep him sexually aroused as much as possible.

Talk sexy to him.

Tell him you are going to make him do something humiliating.

Fondle him, or let him fondle you.

Send him text messages with orders to do something sexual.

Make him give you orgasms frequently.

5. Make him do something humiliating.

Make him wear a butt-plug for a time.

Make him be naked when you are not.

Make him masturbate for you.

Always, ALWAYS make him eat his own cum no matter where it is deposited.

6. Punish him whenever he displeases you.

Don’t let him get away with anything!

Spank, paddle, or whip him.

Humiliate him in some way.

Put Bengay or Icy-Hot on his cock, balls, or anus.

Make him do anything he hates.

7. No matter what you are doing, or where you are, find ways to tease him.

Fondle him through his pants in public (or in private).

Whisper sexy or humiliating things in his ear.

Make him shop for lingerie with you.

Many Sites on the Internet talk about Ruining a Male Orgasm but Don’t actually Discuss the More Effective/Efficient Enslaving Femdom Art Discussed Here - What Most Ladies Are Much More Interested in I Find, is Routine & Habitual “Edging” (Subjugation) of Their Males Psychologically. That’s Playing with Him, Fondling Him, and Masturbating/Stimulating Him - Right to the “Edge” of Orgasm but NOT Actually Letting Him Cum.

Along with Daily Teasing (Physical & Visual), the Trick in the Beginning While Training His Psyche, is Caging Him. Almost Every day that My Male is wearing the penis cage I’ll remove it and Edge Him, at Least Once, if not Twice … After taking a few short breaks & giving him time to rest and recover I Will Then Stat Up All Over Again. Usually a Sleepy Long Cuddling Session Every Morning (often not Real Edging but Just Holding & Feeling His Rock Solid Hardness Rhythmically Pulse & Throb in my Hand, Before we get out of Bed) and then something a lot more Intense and Deliberate in the evening (which might be One Edge or Many in a Row!)  Stroke - Edge - DENY - Repeat…

I always use our morning uncagings and hugging as an excuse/opportunity for him to shower and take it with him to wash it. He knows if I catch him playing with himself while in the shower the penis cage will stay on for a Month or More, So He Doesn’t Dare Do It. I’ve Trained Him Very Well, I Have to Say.

And oh yeah, Never Let Your Male go Pee in the Morning, Until it’s Time For Him to get up and Shower. You See, If He Has to Pee - He'll Helplessly & Quite Naturally, Grow Extra Rock Hard in Your Hand while Your Cuddling & Holding Him in the Morning.

The Real Art with “Edging” (And It Is Most Definitely an Art); is to Learn Exactly How to get Him as Close as Possible to an Explosion without Actually Allowing Him to Erupt !!! If you pay Close Attention while you Fondle & Play, You’ll Learn Precisely the Clear Warning Signs of an Imminent Ejaculation. There’s Nothing Quite Like “Edging” For Subliminally Building a Guys Libido & Desire. Not Only Will He Cherish You More Thanks to Neurochemistry, But within a Short Timeframe His Vulnerable / Exploitable Mind Will Be Totally Under Your Feminine Control …

Here are some powerful training tips:

Make Him “Always” Tell You - Exactly - How Close He is !!! Kind of obvious, but Insist that he Tells you When to Slow Down & When to Stop. Especially in the Beginning While You’re Learning How To Read His Body Language. Keep talking to Him, Ask Him How it Feels, What is Best. You’ll soon get the FEEL of it {LOL} & He’ll Love You Even More For It…

Feel for his body & muscles tensing - Him holding his Breath, Arching his Back or Even Tensing, All Are Signs he’s getting Very Close. Learn to read & understand the Signs and don’t worry if you go over, you’re Learning! Just Be Sure It’s a Libido Building (Subjugating) “Ruined” Orgasm…

Move from strong to soft strokes, from his vein filled shaft up to His Tip - Constantly - “Change It Up” - Take your Time and Make Sure You Get Him Ultra Rock Hard for Maximum Dopamine production in his Vulnerable Brain. I Personally Like Lots of lube / oil and fast but not too tight of strokes, and then as he gets closer & closer, move to an looser grip and then focus on his Hyper-Sensitive head and frenulem (the strip underneath the head at the top where Guys are most sensitive). Also Take Breaks Frequently - It’s Better to Stop One second too Early Than One Second Too Late !!!  Stroke - - Edge - - DENY - - Repeat…

Make it Ultimately HIS Fault if He Erupts. So Again, if he Does Explode, Make Sure You Properly “Ruin it” ; Stop All Rubbing / Stimulation as Soon as he Starts Climax. OR if he’s tied down, you turn it into a post orgasm torture, After the Ruined Orgasm, Where you use his slippery cum as lube to keep rubbing his hypersensitive Joystick - Scolding Him By Saying, ‘You’re so Naughty, I Didn’t Give You Permission To Cum !!!’

When You DO Want to Enjoy His Pent Up Explosions, Make that Part of the Tease Too. When You’re Planning to Make Him Climax & Erupt, This is a great Time to Also Practice your "Edging" Techniques… Use it as an Opportunity to See Just How Crazy You can Make Him, where you’re not worrying about Accidently Taking Him Over the Edge.

Oh and you can add a Wonderfully Sadistic element with this line, ‘If you can hold on for Just five minutes More My Love, I won’t Ruin It when you Do Cum, Okay Baby?’

A Very Effective Mind Fuck & Programming Tool.

We wanted guests to feel right at home and very secure when they stay with us in Austin Texas, so hubby built this very nice Southwest style bed…