The Real Jessika Rabbit

1. How long have you been practicing polyamory?

For 6 years, since 2009

Hopefully, through writing, I will find my voice.

Reblog if you’re polyamorous/open to polyamory in the future/in a polycule or open to one/interested in polyamory I want to see how many of us there are

Form your habits

free printable you can download here

Forming your habits can be extremely difficult, here’s a tool that can help you achieve that. I use a 21 days calendar because it’s customary in these sort of things. It’s not scientifically based but usually 21 days are enough for most people to create a new lasting habit. Sometimes you’ll need more.

All the sections in the printable are there to help you, so I really recommend you fill every part! Let’s see what those are:

Triggers - it can be anything, even an alarm on your phone, but I suggest you ‘latch’ your new habit to some old one you have. Like if you want to start flossing, use as a trigger ‘after washing my teeth’ or something logical like that. Also put this printable somewhere you can see, so that you’ll be reminded of it!

Rewards - while the habit in itself should be a reward you definitely need something a little more short term because sometimes it’s difficult to see the long term plan. Something small and easy, like congratulating yourself, or crossing off the task in your planner or app, or buy something small like a song or an app, or do a little dance or whatever it might work for you and might bring a smile on your face.

Why am I doing this? - This is possibly the most important. if you don’t have a personal reason to form a new habit you’ll never find the motivation to do it.

Tiny Victories - More often than not you’ll face all sort of obstacles during your attempt to form your habit. Consider from the beginning a list of small wins that are a ‘lighter version’ of your habit. So you don’t have to punish yourself if you don’t get that day to perform your habit. It will make it easier for you to start the habit and it will not become a chore. 

“but I just don’t want to today…” - We are our worst enemies. You know yourselves pretty well, you probably have tried more than once to attempt this habit, so you know how many excuses you can come up in the next 21 days to avoid working on your habit… “I’m too stressed to do this” “I was so good yesterday I can take a day off” “I’m on vacation”… and so on. Make a list of replies to yourself, now that your excitement is at the top so in the next days you’ll be able to read it again and convince yourself to actually do what you proposed yourself to do.

Here’s a list of good habits you might want to try:

daily review of your planner

cleanup your desk

meditate

take a walk

exercise for 30 minutes

15 minutes of gesture drawing

wake up early

work 30 minutes on your personal project

use a language app

write in your journal

clean something

Just holding your sub

Giving them a bath

A massage

Using soothing lotions on bruises/marks

A short nap with your sub. 

Petting/soothing with words. (i.e. good girl/good boy/ you did so well)

Giving a treat (warm milk/tea/some goldfish, etc)

Brushing their hair

Watching a movie of your sub’s choice

Reading a book to them

Kissing their marks/bruises/wounds

Letting them know they’re safe

Shibari Tutorial: Six Ring Harness