HE CAN LOWER THE BLOCK

mozzarella and parmesan is kind of like the age gap yuri of cheese

what the, op must have been a cute and delightful princess when she wrote this

funniest thing to ever happen was when my boyfriend put on the first episode of columbo (which i'd never seen) but he wouldn't tell me what show it was he would only say "you'll get it when he shows up." but a fun fact about the first episode of columbo is that he doesn't show up for 32 minutes and when he does, he silently walks into the room with a cigar and does a little pose and goes "hi i'm columbo."

In my new gacha game, you can now pull for scantily clad anime women who represent famous airplane crashes.

fuck. I just had my amazing digital breakfast.

Jesus Christ. I have to call my friends Jax, Pomni, Eel, Ragatha, Kingler, Crane, Zooble, Spiral, Whisper, Whimper, Dr. Curmudgeon, Cryptotheism, Hollow Mile, Randy, Dan Randy, Zooble, Zort, Grindr, Lucky, Fucker 2, Edwain, Sorceror, BattleMeal, Mr Beast, and all of the Amazing Digital Crew to warn them!!!

getting hypnotized is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off

aww, slide to the left for mommy~ and take it back now, kitty…. aww, there’s a good girl. one hop this time?