mimhalennia

But Shane will not tolerate poor injury maintenance so he tells Ilya to undress and lay down so he can give him a massage. Ilya keeps making “happy ending” jokes but goes quiet when Shane starts to legitimately massage his sore muscles, taking time to take care of Ilya and make sure he’s ok. Ilya weakly tries to make a few more sex jokes to distract from the sweetness of the moment but Shane just lightly whacks his head and tells him to shut up and relax

Half of ilya is panicking because this isn’t how this is supposed to work, Shane meets up with Ilya because Ilya provides sex and mental escapism, if Shane is the one providing something to him then Ilya is Failing. The problem is the other half of him has fully melted into a puddle on the mattress and he doesn’t know how much he could do in that moment even if he wanted to. And dammit he really does want to just exist under Shane’s hands as he is taken care of by someone who is asking for nothing in return for the first time in… Too long for Ilya to be willing to think about

He doesn’t realize he’s fallen asleep until he wakes up to the sun rising, a blanket tucked around his hips. Shane is gone and on the night stand there is a glass of water, some ibuprofen, and a note that says “You can pay me back next time, see you in two weeks -J”

the face of a boy who’s going to SQUEE as soon as he’s out of view

everyone always seems so surprised when shane is funny or makes a joke, and i don't think it's meant to be mean, but like? yeah shane is funny. he's always been funny. he's picky about his audience (because he has his image to think about and also because he's just naturally reserved), but he is snarky and quick with it. you know who has ALWAYS found him funny, though?

and on ilya's part, he chirps partially (i think) strategically to have the other team playing annoyed because that's not going to have them on their a-game, but also?? it's for fun. he is puppy nipping and going "play??? play back??? play??" and with almost everyone (because of the reputation he's been branded under), the response he gets is fuck off and a refusal to engage, like we saw with scott hunter. you know who's always understood that this is supposed to be for fun, though?

Ilya, of course, ups the game. "Should we talk?" he yells in Shane's ear when they go clubbing. Shane grins and nods, and the two make their way to the back...

But Shane is not to be outdone. The next time the Centaurs win a game (which they do often) all the players are cheering and slapping each other on the back and butt in the locker room. Ilya gives a great, short speech as he gets undressed, a post-game sweaty mess that turns Shane all the way on. "Hey Cap!" Shane yells as his teammates clap up Ilya's rousing comments. "You wanna talk?" he asks in front of the whole locker room, and sees his words hit Ilya like a drug, his color rising, his eyes darkening.

(id in ALT text)

So one year for charity different pro athletes get asked to participate in a live game based on one of those “how well do you know your partner” games but instead it’s “how well do you know your rival” and participating means you get to raise money for a charity of your choice and obviously Shane and Ilya want to promote the Irina Project so they agree and go up against other current famous rivals from other sports

And Shane and Ilya discuss ahead of time that obviously they’ll have to just play things off as they usually do, light hearted chirps back and forth and what not, “winning” is just for the show and won’t impact how much money gets made for their charity so it doesn’t matter. Except then they get there and become overtaken by the need to Win and Be the Best and they are the best. So without needing to discuss changing the plan, as soon as the questions start they lock in and decide that actually they have to demolish everyone else

The other rivals are laughing and making jokes at the questions but Shane and Ilya are deadly serious and the host starts to get a little weirded out by the fact that they actually know the answers and aren’t just saying things like “how many goals last season? Probably one less than me haha” and actually have each others stats memorized

Because the audience is loving it they go to a lightning round that’s just Shane and Ilya and it’s now the usual couple game questions and they’re still getting them right because they can make excuses for knowing later, right now is about Winning

“What is Shane’s favorite breakfast?”

“Kale protein shake with a scoop of peanut butter and a handful of blueberries.”

“Ok um, what is Ilya’s favorite breakfast?”

“Two sausage egg McMuffins with an extra slice of cheese and hashbrowns.”

“What is something on Shane’s bucket list?”

“Sleeping in one of those see through igloos under the northern lights.”

“What is something on Ilya’s bucket list?”

“That thing where you feed giraffes at a zoo.”

“Ok last one. I think we all know Shane’s answer is former paramour Rose Landry, but who do you think is the most famous person Rozanov has ever slept with is?”

*through teeth gritted so tight he is in danger of chipping one* “Probably a model. Or something.”

“… Yeah, let’s go with that.”