˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶

minjeong turns her phone back to her and studies the photo closer. i can see her newly painted nails zooming in.

“i think i heard about johnny hosting a last minute thing… haechan didn’t tell you?” she doesn’t look at me, still focused on the picture, head tilted in confusion. 

i shrug, trying to act like not knowing of his whereabouts is a normal thing. it’s not, by the way.

“he knew i was hanging out with you, maybe that’s why.”

minjeong immediately scoffs, locking her phone and putting it away. “fuck off. you know he doesn’t give a shit that you’re with me. you’re his go to drinking buddy. he whines like a puppy when you take shots without him.” 

she laughs, but it’s half out of disgust. 

“well, it looks like he has a new one, so…” i intend for that to pass as a lighthearted joke, but there’s a snappiness that escapes my mouth. i wince and she looks at me with a softness in her eyes.

“oh babe…” she scoots closer to me on her rug, putting her arms out in an obnoxious gesture to comfort me.

“donnnn’tttt…,” i groan. “it was a joke. i’m not hurt. put those things away.” i slap at her hands and she pouts, arms still up, not backing down.

“haechan is so…” minjeong sighs, resting her head on my shoulder. 

“yeah. yeah, i know.” 

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

haechan and i are eating breakfast at our designated corner booth in the cafe between our two apartments. i can see the hungover drowsiness on his face. purple eye bags to match the purple splotches growing on his neck.

he’s chewing on his pancakes when i decide to ask, “so how was your night?” i flick at one of the hickeys on his neck and he flinches.

“heyyy!” he says through a mouthful of food, cheeks puffed out. 

“what was i supposed to do?” i shrug, innocently. “it’s like this huge, ginormous, gigantic, red target that i just have to-“ i aim for my next flick and he grabs my wrist swiftly.

“okay, cool it.” he drops my hand and it plops into my lap. 

i snicker at his nippy attitude, pinching his cheek to instigate further. “pouty boy was at johnny’s last night?”

haechan turns to look at me, throwing a lazy smirk. “you stalking me?” he says, earning me a groan.

i unlock my phone to show him my new prized lockscreen, an overexposed picture of two very drunk men smiling goofily. “you two idiots sent me a selfie last night.”

he hisses, nose scrunched up in distaste at the ridiculous picture of him and johnny. “not my best angle.”

“not sure if you have any,” i tease and haechan gives me a lopsided grin. “so who’s the lucky girl?”

“wouldn’t you like to know?” he counters, going in for another bite of my bacon. i let him take it.

“yeah, that’s why i asked,” i say with as much nonchalance as i could muster. i take my bacon strip back from his hands, even though there’s already not much left of it.

feeling bad, he cuts pieces of his pancake and puts them on my plate. i smile giddily, reaching for the syrup.

“her name’s lulu.” i pause mid syrup pour, not expecting him to have remembered her name. i clear my throat, recollecting myself, and continued to drench my food. 

it’s not that haechan is this dumb boy who gets around a lot. he totally could be with the amount of attention he used to get in college. but he was always careful about how far he’d flirt with someone, which is impressive considering his naturally charming personality. most words that came out of his mouth sounded like a pick up line.

i could only recall one serious relationship from our college years, and that in itself only lasted three months. of course, i remember him dating, but that’s all it was- super casual attempts to form a lasting relationship that never really pulled through. he’d go on a couple dates every so often, but never bothered me with the details because the details never seemed to matter. it was actually kind of cold, how he had approached dating.

but now i have a name. he has a name.

“oh wow,” i respond. “is this lulu… the one?” i joke, but the question leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, even with all the sugar from his pancakes.

“god, i forgot i’m talking to you.” haechan winces.

“hey, what’s that supposed to mean!” i elbow him in the side.

“it means i’m talking to a delusional hopeless romantic.” and weirdly that puts me at ease, that must mean he’s not too serious about her right? but then again, why should i care? right?

“you say that like it’s a bad thing,” i roll my eyes.

he just shakes his head, chuckling. “i’ll probably see her again this week.”

“oh?” i look at his side profile, watching him casually tap his phone screen to check for notifications. 

his lockscreen lights up and i’m reminded of our annual joint birthday party from earlier this year. it’s a picture of us with our shared cake, candles all lit, with our arms drunkenly wrapped tightly around the other. i remember our group of friends huddled around us, singing loudly and off tune. i’m looking at him as he’s looking at the camera and-

lulu texts.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“there are my girls!”

a very intoxicated johnny starts running towards minjeong and i, beer can sloshing around his hand and onto the dirt lot. following behind him are the rest of the group, matching his lack of sobriety.

“aww, you started without us,” minjeong pouts, taking the drink from him. johnny doesn’t fight it, smiling down at her.

“you guys got here so late, you missed the first couple sets!” jaehyun appears next to me, giving me a side hug and hovers there. he’s definitely buzzed already. he offers me a sip of his drink, which i gladly take.

“couldn’t get an uber, we were fighting for our lives. oh my god, it was so bad.” i groaned, throwing back the can so i can quickly get on their level.

“should’ve just left work early and met up with us,” johnny tsks.

“i just had one more work call! i didn’t know it’d go for that long,” minjeong explains, her slumped figure showing how exhausted she was. regardless, her last minute festival outfit looked amazing.

i scan the group and my brain notices the missing brunette.

“where’s haechan?” i look to jaehyun. he juts his head out aimlessly to the crowd of festival people.

“getting another drink,” he says, head bobbing to the surrounding sounds.

“he better have gotten me one,” i start, looking for him, expecting two drinks to be in his hands.

and there he is, jogging towards us, with a cup and… a girl.

i tense up and jaehyun takes it as a cue to relax into me further, heavy arm around my shoulders. i’m about to tell his drunk ass to get off, when he gives me a knowing look. confused, i let him lean on me.

“took you guys long enough,” haechan quips, and the girl remains standing slightly behind him.

“tell me about it,” minjeong rolls her eyes. then she looks at the girl and then back at haechan and then back at the girl. the rest of the group is quiet waiting for haechan to introduce her to minjeong and i, but his lips stay shut, completely unaware.

“hi, i’m minjeong,” she abruptly breaks the silence. her hand is extended and the girl takes hers out of haechan’s to shake it.

“lulu, so nice to meet you,” she smiles so sweetly i can tell she means it.

“i'm y/n,” i cut in, just waving at her, not really able to move any closer. there’s no glimpse of recognition on her face. she just gives me a “hi” and a smile like i’m just another girl a part of the friend group. no big deal.

jaehyun hums, “so should we go see the next stage?”

“let’s,” i say, desperate to get going and out of this weird air. jaehyun leads the way, and i follow suit, trying to limit my haechan interactions. something in my chest just tells me i don’t want to be speaking to him right now. 

unfortunately, he doesn’t know that so he’s catching up to me with lulu in tow.

“nice outfit, very 2024 of you,” haechan teases, flicking the seam of my reused skirt.

“kinda creepy that you remember i wore this to last year’s fest too…” i glare judgingly.

“you were complaining about how cold you were the entire time. how could i not?” he smirks. “ride was okay?”

“expensive, but okay,” i nodded, trying to act casual. “i’m sorry, lulu, right?”

said girl perks up from behind haechan and catches up to our pace. “yes, hi! sorry for crashing your guys’ plans. my friends bailed so… and then chanie asked and yeah!”

“oh chanie’s sweet like that,” i peer at haechan and his cheeks are pink at the sound of that nickname leaving my mouth. 

“how do you guys know each other?” i ask innocently. haechan throws me a knowing look and lets lulu talk.

“we started seeing each other after johnny’s party,” lulu smiles, glancing at haechan. he matches her look, pulling her closer to his side.

wow.

“you guys are…,” i swallow the lump in my throat. “you look- really cute together!” i try to mimic their smiles, but nothing comes close to the lovesick grins on their faces. 

“y/n.” 

i follow the sound of my name, and jaehyun’s hand is extended towards me. i stare at it, confused, but also weirdly filled with relief for the distraction. 

“there’s a gap in the crowd, i think we can squeeze to the front.”

without even checking in with haechan and lulu, i quickly grab his escape offer and he’s dragging me through the audience. i can suddenly smell the sweat and dirt of the desert, the sweet alcohol on people’s breaths. i feel myself getting queasy and i make the mistake of looking back as jaehyun moves me forward.

i get the perfect view of haechan and lulu kissing, swaying to the intro of the song. my feet finally stop and i run into jaehyun’s chest, his head is naturally far above mine and his eyes follow where i once looked. 

“i’m sorry,” he sort of yells over the artist on stage.

“what for?” i yell back. he playfully pinches the redness on my cheeks (not from the sun) and rolls his eyes as if saying: you know what.

he just shakes his head and holds mine in his hands, almost cradling it.

“i-,” i try to turn back to look at them again and his hands cage me.

“don’t,” jaehyun stands firm. “you’ll just hurt yourself more.”

with my stomach churning a pain i’ve never experienced before, i nod. i’m so still, scared that that awful feeling will make its way up to my chest.

jaehyun pulls me into a brief hug, and turns his attention back to the stage, holding me from behind. i watch the people from my peripheral, lightly dancing to the music and i try so hard to do the same.

“just have fun,” jaehyun reminds me.

but everytime i blink, i see them kissing and it makes me want to puke. 

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

what r u doing tomorrowww?

i stare at my text from yesterday, as i sit on the couch in the dark, with an episode of “Love Island USA” luminating my face. minjeong had already called it a night, and was asleep in her room. i cringe whenever i let my eyes linger up to all the one sided messages above it and his scarce one word responses. 

it’s been a couple months since i’d last hung out with haechan one on one. of course, i still saw him in group outings but he was always preoccupied with that one long haired girl and her signature red lip. 

even then, he was never really present. at last week’s bowling night, he showed up halfway and played for two rounds before pleading defeat. haechan was never one to not be competitive, and yet he took lulu to the arcade area where they stayed — just the two of them — the rest of the night. when we all ordered ubers at the end of the night, the backseat was crammed with me, her, and all her newly won stuffed animals. there was also a suffocating thickness in those seats with us too, and i don’t think it was from the human sized teddy bear that weighed on my shoulder. 

to torture myself even more, i let myself open my calls and it was embarrassing how many times his name showed up in unreturned calls. i went to delete all recent calls when a notification filled my screen: an incoming call from mama lee.

“hi honey, sorry to call so late! just wanted to check in on you!” my heart instantly warmed at the familiar twang in her voice that her and haechan seemed to share. i can hear her TV in the background playing the same show as me.

“hi mama lee! i’m great, tired, all of the above. how are you?” i finally let myself settle into the couch, realizing i had been tense this whole time waiting for a certain someone.

“i’m good, glad to hear you are too. what’s this about you not coming next month?” haechan’s mom asked, straight to the point, and suddenly i’m sat up again.

“next month…,” i mutter to myself, trying to recall what she could be referring to.

next month… next month… is december. their annual christmas party. 

“oh! the christmas par-“ i start, excitement filling my body. it had become my favorite time of the year, thanks to him and his family. 

“sweetie, haechan told me you aren’t coming. which i find unfair because how am i supposed to meet this new girl in his life without you there? i don’t know this girl!”

static fills my ear and i check the TV to see if the connection had gone off. but it was still on. nausea immediately fills my stomach as the combination of his months long lack of contact and this sudden news makes me feel dizzy. it’s like i can finally and physically feel the distance haechan forced between us that i was trying so hard to ignore.

i’m at a crossroads of whether to be honest or play along, because what does she mean haechan said i’m not going to a party i’ve gone to every year? to a party that never required an invitation? to a party i often skip my own family’s to go to? 

“oh i… my mom, she, um,” i fumble over my words and i can feel water splat onto my thighs. i’m distraught trying to protect her peace as i can feel mine rapidly falling apart. 

“sorry,” i softly laugh, trying to compose myself. i tilt my head up, hoping it’ll stop the sudden tears. “my mom really wants me home this season, so i can’t go this year.”

“aw honey, you don’t understand how sad i was to hear from him. why didn’t you tell me? i bought your favorite ham a month in advance like the crazy woman i am.” we laugh, but it does nothing to lighten the weight in my chest. 

“ah. maybe haechan will save me some leftovers,” i say, but now doubt he will. 

“okay, well, i’m glad your mom’s reaching out.” she says, and i can tell she means it. sucks knowing it’s not even true.

mama lee continues, “it’s getting late for me. i gotta sleep, but i wanna hear more from you soon, okay? you owe me.” her sweet voice pierced my heart, and i feel myself hiccupping again.

“yes, ma’am,” i manage to get out, and we say our good night’s and i love you’s.

then my screen goes back to those cursed text messages and i delete our entire chat.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“he said what?” jaehyun’s eyes are as wide as i’ve ever seen them, fork suspended mid air. the egg falls from it, and comically splats onto the plate. 

we’re at the same cafe i often frequent with haechan, but because i’m here with jaehyun, we’re eating at an ungodly early hour of the day. i had never seen this place at this time, but jaehyun is an extreme morning bird. 

“i literally got uninvited from his family’s christmas party and i had to hear it from his mom.” i confess, surprised at how composed i sounded despite it being the most devastating news of my life. shockingly worse than finding out my parents were getting divorced back in high school. i saw it coming, but this? never in a million years.

“but you… you’ve always gone. his family is literally yours.” jaehyun’s confusion takes over his mouth, and i don’t think he realizes how much his obvious statement stung.

“i bought his siblings their gifts already too. i never thought i wouldn’t get the chance to exchange them?” i swirl the lukewarm coffee mug in my hands, not having the stomach to take a sip.

“this is fucked up. has he talked to you about it yet?” 

“nope,” i pop my lips. “what makes you think he even has the time to?” i sneer, referring to a certain woman occupying all his time. i feel disgusting having these ill feelings towards her, despite her literally not being at fault. 

jaehyun grimaces, and he instinctively gives my arm a squeeze. “doesn’t give him an excuse to be an asshole. he should’ve told you. but also, he shouldn’t have uninvited you in the first place? you’ve never not gone.”

i shrug, “maybe it was wrong of me to assume…”

“when you’ve gone every year since i’ve known you? you’ve gone more times than me and haechan and i are childhood neighbors. come on…” jaehyun plants the hard facts i’m unwilling to face, and i squirm in my seat. i take a sip of my coffee and feel it run down the sides of the knot in my throat, sickeningly bitter. 

“it’s whatever. anyways, since you’re going home, do you mind giving his siblings their gifts for me? minjeong invited me to her home for the holidays instead.”

“sure, but-“

“oh hey, guys?”

jaehyun and i look up from our table, stunned to hear the voice of our drama calling us. 

“haechan,” i only say, feeling awkward that we were just talking about him but also weird that this is the first i’ve seen him in weeks. 

he’s carrying a takeout bag in his hand, dressed in clothes he definitely picked up off the floor. i could see the side of his head where his pillow messed up his brown, fluffy hair and the bags under his eyes that always signal late night gaming. he’s wearing a confused look on his face as he scans jaehyun and i.

we’re sitting in our designated booth and before i could let myself feel like i’m cheating on him, the sour reminder of our conversation takes over.

“take out?” jaehyun wonders.

haechan clears his throat, shaking him out of the weird daze he was in. “yeah, lu is waiting at home.”

at home. the air leaves my lungs just hearing that come out of him, and i realize that this is a feeling i really need to dissect. this cannot be just platonic jealousy, right? losing my best friend these past few months isn’t supposed to hurt this bad.

“got plans for next month? when are you heading home?” jaehyun goes straight for the kill, and i kick the side of his foot to stop him from prying. i don’t know if i want to hear his answers.

haechan’s eyes widen and he immediately looks at me. his hands tighten around the white plastic takeout bag. i can see his mind struggle to tell me something and the pained look on his face makes me want to save him the trouble. he begins to start and i just can’t bear it.

“minjeong’s taking me to hers this christmas,” i cut him off, filling him in on my newfound plans, that i really didn’t have a choice in making if i wanted to not spend the holidays alone. it hurts seeing the way his body relaxes, i can visibly see him fill with the relief of knowing i’m not going. my eyes naturally water, and i quickly dab them away. 

“can you let your mom know i can’t come this year? i don’t know if i could tell her myself,” i shrug, mustering a close lipped smile. i can feel jaehyun’s disappointing glare burn into my face, or maybe it’s the sharp sting of his hand that just punched my thigh under the table. 

“oh. oh! yeah, yeah, of course,” haechan forces sadness onto his facial features. “sorry to hear you can’t go, but holidays at minjeong’s sounds fun! we’ll miss you,” he starts to fidget with the bag now and his feet shift. he scratches the back of his left ear, a tell-tale sign that he’s uncomfortable… or feeling guilty.

“ah, but you always go to the lee holiday party?” jaehyun turns towards me, boldness flashing in his eyes as he dares me to address it. 

“next time!” haechan quickly interjects. “don’t worry about it!”

“i’m not.” i state, point blank, and a new expression paints his face that i can’t decipher.

“we-well, lulu’s probably starving by now, so. i’ll see you guys later?” haechan rambles out, already taking steps away from us.

“maybe,” i shrug, feeling the iciness take over my body and make its way into my words. 

“right,” haechan nods, stumbling as he leaves the cafe. i don’t bother watching him leave, starting to stab my food aggressively with my fork. 

“i can’t believe he just did that,” jaehyun says in disbelief, but i’m so consumed with rage i can barely hear him.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

i get voicemails from haechan’s siblings on the morning of christmas, thanking me for the gifts, wondering why i’m not there, and most importantly, asking me who this lulu is and why she’s taken my spot. i make a mental note to call them back when i’m not downing mugs of minjeong’s dad’s strangely strong eggnog.

somehow the classical christmas music that had been playing on loop for the past two hours in minjeong’s living room had shifted to karaoke, and i can feel the alcohol hitting everyone all at once. the matching pajamas that her family forced me to wear started to feel too warm on my skin like it didn’t belong on me. i sat and watched her drunk uncle sing to a random Justin Bieber song and i catch myself thinking singing must not run in their family the way it does for haechan’s.

i itch to call him, but i know i shouldn’t. but the guilt of not even wishing him a merry christmas eats me up despite him having yet to do the same. i avoided mentioning him all day because i knew minjeong would say something, but now that she’s too preoccupied with her solo, i slip into her childhood room. 

it feels like i’m walking on a moving boat as i cross her room to crash onto her bed. her popcorn ceiling spins in my vision and i groan at how out of body i feel. 

my thumb is already clicking his contact before i could register it and my phone blinks, indicating he’s picked up.

“hello?” i hear him faintly on the other side, chatter quieting in the background. i put him on speaker and i hear him shut a door. the party sounds on his side are now muffled.

“hi haechan. merry christmas,” i don’t notice how sweet my voice sounds till a second later and my whole body cringes.  

i hear him sigh, and i turn to my side, cradling my phone. “merry christmas.”

“how’sss… the party?” i ask, just trying to keep him on the line for as long as possible. 

“crazy per usual. the kids say thank you for the gifts, i made sure they called you too. did you get them?” his voice is so clear and sober, i feel like a groggy mess talking to him. i want him to sound as messy as me. his words sting like ice with how composed he sounds. 

“mhmmm,” i hum. “i’m glad, so so so glad.” i play with the frays of minjeong’s blanket between my fingers, starting to sing my words. 

“sounds like you’re having fun,” haechan laughs under his breath. “we miss you here.”

that statement alone felt like an ice cold bucket of water dunked over my head. my vision suddenly cleared, the room stilled, and i felt like i could hear even a pin drop. how could he say that when he fought so hard to isolate me like this?

“is that so?” i test him. 

“yeah, of course,” haechan starts. “you know it’s not the same without you.” i hear his bed creak and i know he’s sitting on the left corner where one of his bed slats has cracked. haechan used to volunteer to sleep on that side on the holiday weekends when i was over. he’d start on that side and in the middle of the night, i’d hear it creak as he rolled over to cuddle me. he’d apologize every time in the morning despite it never being an issue for me. 

thinking of that memory being lost and forgotten hurt more than the fact that it could be replaced by another person right now. 

i sit up, ignoring the spinning of my head. “is that what you told your mom?” my voice sounded sterner than i thought it could at this level of toxicity. 

he’s silent on his end. i give him a couple seconds to see if he’d confess. 

“you know she actually called me a month ago. said you told her i wasn’t coming.” i continued. he’s still quiet and it’s so pathetic.

“i had to lie to her, haechan,” i hiccup, tasting salt in my mouth that wasn’t there before. “i told her that my mom reached out to me which was probably such a bad lie since we both know she’d never do that.” 

haechan hissed, and it’s like i can see him in his childhood room, trying to rub the stress out from the creases between  his eyes. 

“i had to lie and say that, instead of the truth. the truth being that my best friend doesn’t want me at his family party, in his life even, and he didn’t have the fucking guts to tell me.” i spit out these words like venom, and i can hear them hitting him through the phone, not knowing if they’re doing the damage i want them to.

“look, i… i didn’t know what to do. please, just-“ suddenly i feel the balance shift, and i can feel how small he sounds on the other end. hiding in his room like a coward.

“your mom texted me pictures, said she wishes i was there. it hurt so bad, haechan,” i start crying and i thank god that the karaoke is still blasting because i can’t control how loud my sobs are. “it hurt so bad seeing you two laughing and looking happy in those pictures.”

i didn’t have to specify who; he knows. i know he knows with the way he falls silent. i almost think he hung up.

“i’m sorry,” is all he can say. it could’ve been a fly buzzing by my ear with how insignificant his lackluster apology sounded right now.

“i thought it would be me,” i confess, surprising him and myself. and it feels better than i expected, or maybe it’s the alcohol suppressing my anxieties. i wonder how good it must feel to be lulu, knowing that the boy that i love is now in love with her. 

“i know,” he says. i hang up so fast, tossing my phone away, because i almost think i hallucinate him saying “me too.”

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

when the plane landed, i had 4 missed calls from haechan, 2 from his mom, and 1 from his sister. i didn’t end up telling minjeong what transpired because she was already so upset leaving her family the following morning; her eyes were all puffy. a day has passed and i still haven’t said anything, not sure if it’s because i’m over it or if it’s out of embarrassment. 

it wasn’t till later today where i was forced to confront what happened when jaehyun calls, desperately asking to be picked up from the airport. 

“i don’t see you, are you sure you’re at terminal 1? i’m literally at the end of it.” i practically scream through the call connected to my old 2008 lexus. 

“what? no, terminal 2. we’re at terminal 2,” jaehyun repeats, just as loudly.

“wait. we?” i ask, before spotting the two boys with their luggages at the curb of terminal 2, and a girl beside them.

i pull in, trying my best not to stare, cursing under my breath and hoping whatever bad karma i’ve collected throughout my twenty plus years of life gets passed onto jaehyun for omitting this important detail. i put the car in park and hop out to open the trunk. 

“you owe me,” i say at the exact same time as jaehyun’s, “i owe you.” 

he puts his luggage in and picks me up into a spinning hug. i smack his solid shoulder, not falling for his buttering tactics. 

“you smell like the plane,” i scowl. jaehyun just laughs and taps the trunk of my car, still open and waiting for the others standing awkwardly to the side. 

“haechan, you okay? you know we’ve landed, right?” he jokes in response to his friend’s stillness.

i don’t even bother giving haechan a glance despite feeling his eyes try their best to make contact with mine. i simply get back into the driver’s seat, waiting for them to finish loading the car. 

eventually, i hear the passenger door open and i turn, ready to talk to jaehyun, but it’s not him. 

“why are you—“ 

“feeling sick from the plane, i don’t think i can sit in the back.” haechan says, matter of factly. 

i narrow my eyes at him, shocked at the way i can look at him now and ignore the sound of my heart breaking.

his brown hair has gotten longer, it curls around the nape of his neck. its messy all on top like he’s ran his hands through it multiple times. the wind from outside makes it flop everywhere. on top of that, his eyes are tired and his cheeks i liked to pinch so much sag a little. 

his lips are rolled in and chapped as he waits for me to challenge him and i don’t have the energy to. so i just redirect my attention to the two in the back.

“lulu, am i dropping you off with haechan?” she’s sitting neatly in my car and we both can feel how weird this is.

“ummm, my house is fine, if it’s not too out of the way,” she smiles at me. “thanks for picking us up.”

i decide not to shoot haechan a questioning look and i just let her punch in her address. 

during the whole twenty minute ride, i’m asking jaehyun as many questions as possible, sounding like someone really invested in his christmas plans. i eventually got a detailed breakdown of his entire weekend itinerary. haechan wasn’t able to get a single word in, but it also didn’t seem like he wanted to — which was odd for him. 

i dropped lulu off and i begin mapping to haechan’s, when he stops me. 

“jaehyun’s closer.” 

“no i’m not.” “no he’s not.” jaehyun and i say simultaneously. 

“yes, he is,” haechan says sternly, already having the GPS set. 

i don’t have the energy to fight him so i drive to jaehyun’s, not needing the directions. i can see him twiddling his thumbs in the back and i make glances through the rearview mirror. he just shrugs and i chew my lip nervously. 

“thanks again for the ride. breakfast on me tomorrow?” jaehyun offers once we reach his place, head sticking through my driver side window, duffel strapped onto his shoulder. 

haechan’s head pokes out from my peripheral, “she’s got plans.” 

my eyebrows shoot up at the same time jaehyun’s eyes go wide. he simply nods and gives me a shoulder squeeze good bye. 

i pull out of his apartment complex, and start heading towards haechan’s, praying the silence isn’t disturbed during this short five minute drive. 

“i can’t believe you got my brother that new ps5 game,” haechan starts. “mom’s already using it as leverage to get his grades up.”

i simply hum in response, not letting my eyes drift off the road. 

“she really liked the necklace you got her. she practically screamed when she opened the box.” i can’t see it, but i can feel him smiling fondly. his family’s happiness always meant the most to him.

i can’t help the warm relief i feel in my chest knowing his mom liked my gift. unfortunately, my thoughts turn sour as i wonder if she liked it more than the gift lulu got her. my hands grip the wheel tighter.

“she grilled me pretty bad this morning… i told her the truth.” now it feels like the air’s been sucked out of the car.

“and what is ‘the truth’?” i manage to say. 

he goes quiet again and i see his apartment up ahead. i pull over and park the car, not caring how far we actually were, and turned the engine off. the car is still humming as it settles down, and i take my seatbelt off, hoping it’ll take the weird weight off my chest. 

“what’d you tell her, haechan?” 

he sat still and didn’t move a muscle. i can see his brain churning as he refuses to look at me now. but i’m staring at him dead on, unrelenting. 

“i told her that i didn’t want you there.”

wow. 

i blinked. and i blinked. and i blinked, hoping my eyes would deceive me into seeing some sort of sign that he was lying. a flinch. an ear scratch. anything.

i open my mouth to say something (im not sure what) and i hope he beats me to it, ready to deny his claim, but he doesn’t. 

after all these years in each other’s lives, this is how he truly feels? a huge chunk of me wants to convince myself he must be lying, but how could i when he’s saying it straight to my face like this. so many questions run through my head and each one left unanswered feels like another stab to the chest.

when did he start feeling this way? was our friendship just a charity for him? were my feelings for him never reciprocated in the slightest? was it all a lie?

“and… and that’s your truth?” i whisper, but it felt like a desperate cry, begging him to say no. 

“yes. and what’s even more true is that i broke your heart.” 

he peaks at me, between the cracks of his fingers that are now cradling his face. i can tell he’s not being fully honest about what’s going on between us, and i’m not sure if he can right now, but he wasn’t wrong about what he said about the state of my heart. 

“hm. ‘tis the season.” 

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

while shutting my laptop screen, i say bye to my coworkers as we leave the conference room. despite usually getting winter break off, my boss had called in an emergency meeting to settle things before people start truly ignoring their work emails. my coworkers had every right to complain about coming in on a saturday during the holidays while they badged into the building, but i didn’t mind. no meeting could be worse than the week i’ve had. 

i was last to leave the floor since i had a couple things at my desk to grab. getting onto the elevator alone, i watched the numbers descend until it halted at the 21st floor. i awkwardly side stepped to make room for the oncoming person as the doors parted. 

“oh.” i could only gape because right in front of me was lulu.

“oh!” she returned, before giving me a wave and getting in. “they got you working the holidays too?”

i try to look at her from my peripheral, but it feels too awkward. like any movement on my part would be weird. 

“not really, my boss just stresses and so she called a quick meeting.” i roll my lips in, teetering on the balls of my feet. could this elevator be any slower?

“oh wow. mine doesn’t believe in holiday breaks, hence why i’m here. i didn’t know you worked in this building.” she eyes my laptop, looking for a company name.

“it was my first job out of college, but they had me working remote for my first year.” i explain.

“oh, that makes sense. i feel like i’m always here and yet i only saw you for the first time with hae-” lulu cuts herself off, and clears her throat.

my face grows hot, immediately thinking that she must’ve heard from him about my drunk christmas breakdown. i’d be furious if i weren’t so embarrassed right now. i turn to finally look at her, in an attempt to take control of this situation. 

“too many floors, lots of people,” i smile half-heartedly, giving her a shrug. finally, the elevator stops at the lobby and i let out a breath that i don’t mean to.

“anyways, happy holidays! maybe i’ll see you at johnny’s,” i wave my white flag, coming to terms with this being my reality if her and haechan continue dating. i'm done fighting it.

lulu doesn’t get off the elevator, and she tilts her head, puzzlement painting her face. she shakes it off quickly and just nods, reaching her hand out to keep the door from shutting on her.

i hurry out the building, muttering curses under my breath because of course, not only did i have to run into lulu, but i forgot my coat at my desk as well. wrapping my cardigan tighter around my body, i trudge through the city streets to get to my car because of course, our parking garage is closed.

i hear someone calling my name behind me, and i turn around to see lulu chasing after me. her cheeks look pink like they were whipped by the recent cold winds. and yes, she looks perfect.

“i wanted- i wanted to clarify something.” she catches her breath, holding onto my shoulder. i try not to knock it off like a bitch, so i glare at her hand, waiting for her to get a hint. but she doesn’t, or pretends she doesn't, as she continues.

“we broke up,” she starts. “and yeah, it has to do with us as individuals, but it was mainly… it was mainly to do with you.” 

while rooted in shock, i search her to face to find any ounce of rage or bitterness towards me. my guards are up looking for a sign that she was going to slap me across the face, but i sensed nothing. i’m about to ask her why when she starts again.

“he hurt me pretty bad, but i should’ve seen it coming. i’m not you,” she shrugs, as if she’s already come to terms with her feelings. she says it as if it was a true and proven fact. but none of what she said makes sense to me. also, i know we’re not talking, but why didn’t he tell me? why didn’t he tell any of us?

“i don’t understand…” i say.

“i’ve said too much. you don’t need to understand right now, just promise you’ll hear him out. i know you don’t think you owe me anything, but you technically cost me my boyfriend so… do me this favor.”

before i could agree to anything, she finally lets go of my shoulder and laughs with relief. she tosses her hair over her shoulder and takes a breath, recollecting herself. she never looked like she was in shambles – as she is portraying – to begin with. 

“that felt good. anyway, happy holidays to you too.” and lulu walked away. 

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

johnny’s new year’s extravaganza is on full blast — the biggest turn out he’s ever had. a lot of people ditched their work parties and their family events to gather in his house for a better time. it was so busy that there was barely any open space and he ran out of ice.

before he could instacart some with his drunk trembling fingers, i’m taking the phone from him.

“i’ll get it!” i yelled over the DJ — the DJ is him. “i didn’t drink, i’ll go pick some up!” 

he takes one side of his headphones off, tilting his head asking, are you sure? but the puppy dog look in his eyes shows how much he prefers this over those hiked up delivery fees.

i give him his phone back and tell him i’ll be back in a few. on my way out, i catch a stumbling minjeong and she says she’s gonna stay the night. 

right before i reach the door, jaehyun and our friends come down the stairs, smoke wafting around them. my eyes automatically count the number of them and of course, i notice one missing.

“hey where’s-“ i stop myself, rolling my lips in. unfortunately, they’re not high enough to mishear me or maybe it’s expected of me to want to know his whereabouts. maybe it’s obvious to everyone how i feel about him. what do i know?

“he never showed up,” mark says. “guess he’s not feeling well? did johnny get new floors?” 

mark cautiously steps around like the floor is made of fragile glass and i grab onto his arm, afraid he’s going to fall. he starts giggling like crazy and it’s so cute. 

jaehyun quickly steps in and catches mark’s weight before it crushes me. i give him a thanks and tell him i’m going to get ice. 

“you sure? it’s so late. fuck johnny, we can drink lukewarm drinks.”

i shake my head, “i think i need the air anyways.”

he offers me his car after checking that i’m sober, but i turn him down, already making my way out.

the air is lightly crisp and chilly, no clouds in the sky. it’s the perfect new year weather for fireworks. i’m already two blocks down and there’s still people from his party scattered on the streets. 

while deep in my thoughts about a certain missing someone, i realize i missed the turn to the gas station and am now walking home. as suffocating as it was in that packed house, it felt worse choking on my persistent thoughts in the middle of the night. 

i can feel the deepening crack in my heart that only made this new loneliness of the holiday more apparent. i just finished sending johnny an apology text and i start digging in my purse for my keys. 

the steps to my apartment complex’s front door is occupied by a pair of shoes, connected to a pair of legs, holding up a tired looking haechan. my toes meet his in my haggard search to find my keys and i almost fall back in surprise. he quickly stands to catch my wrist and i’m yanked into his chest, keys falling to the ground.

“what are you- what are you doing here?” i twist my arm out of his grip and take a step back onto flat ground. a small part of me (a big one) fills with relief knowing he was here the whole time and is okay and i feel betrayed by that side of me. 

he looks at me incredulously like he’s not the one camped outside my house. then he looks around to see if anyone is with me, growing concerned.

“what the hell are you doing walking home alone at this time? those assholes couldn’t take you?” standing two steps above me, haechan lectures me like a parent and i’m in no position to be scolded. like a child, the irritation easily blooms in my chest.

“stop acting like you care. it’s pissing me off.” i groan, suddenly feeling all the tiredness from the day in my bones. “you made it clear how you feel about me so just… stop.” you’re confusing me, i think.

i stand here challenging him, quirking an eyebrow waiting for him to move. 

he grabs my lanyard off the ground instead.

“look i…can i?” he gestures to the door, wanting to go inside, looking defeated. his shoulders have fallen from their tense position and haechan just looks so worn out. with how disheveled his appearance is, it looks like he had been waiting outside for hours.

“i… don’t know if that’s a good idea.” i bite my lip, trying to fight the annoying guilt i feel like i’m leaving a stray puppy out in the cold. but i knew that if i let him into my circle again, i’d just end up even more hurt. 

haechan just nods, handing me my keys back. “if you want the whole neighborhood to know how badly i fucked up and how awfully sorry i am, i don’t mind doing this outside.” 

“doing what exactly?” i ask, crossing my arms in front of me. for someone standing so tall above me, he now looked so vulnerable from where i stood below him. 

“apologizing.” haechan states, taking a step down. “confessing.” another step down. perfectly level.

my lips are holding back so many questions, so many exclamations. he can see it in my eyes how quickly my mind runs and how hard i’m trying to not blurt all my thoughts out. i want him to continue, he needs to.

“lulu and i broke up, first of all. that awkward airport car ride was not just awkward because of… us.” he laughs, reliving the scene. i can hear lulu’s words repeating in my head, but i refuse to make sense of them right now. 

“i think… i realize… i was just playing house with her. forcing myself to keep this seemingly easy girlfriend because… because the one i truly wanted scared me so badly.” haechan looks at me with his soft, round brown eyes, making it so obvious who he was referring to. it made me hopeful enough to ask. 

“i scare you?” i say quietly, still so confused and processing the millions of emotions coarsing through my chest. you want me?

“you terrify me.” 

“i don’t un-“

“the way you love me terrifies me. the thought of losing you terrifies me. the way i feel for you terrifies me. the thought of not being enough for you terrifies me!” as he lists, his voice gets louder and i have to grip his forearm to get him to quiet down. 

“haechan…”

“no, i’ve spent years with this fear, fighting my fucking feelings for you just to feel safe. but this… what i’ve done? it feels a million times worse than whatever this stupid fear may manifest. and i should’ve known from all those romcoms you make me watch where the male lead makes the same fucking mistake!” his eyes are ground in by the palms of his hands, pushing back on the tension i can see brewing in his head. 

“i messed up so bad thinking i was doing both of us a favor. but i hurt you more than i ever thought i could. i’m an asshole.” he cries, sniffling hard. with his hands now at his sides, fists clenched, i can clearly see the tears he tried so hard to hold back. 

“i’m sorry… but i love you.” haechan confesses with a pained smile on his tear-stained face, shrugging like it’s truly something to be apologizing for. 

it makes my heart spur with something along the lines of anger, but not quite.

“you’re an idiot for thinking you should ever be sorry for that.” 

i finally speak up. “you’re so stupid!” i shove him, feeling my bag fall off my shoulder.

“you’re so, so stupid!” i punch at his chest, bag smacking onto the floor. 

“i know, i know i-“ he stammers.

“no! you don’t know! how could you decide all of this for us? that not having me in your life would be easier than taking a chance on-on losing me? or loving me?! do you understand how selfish you sound? how selfish you’ve been?” i’m enraged. my fingers are curled around the fabric of the bottom of his shirt because i still can’t quite reach his collar. i’m desperate for him to genuinely hear me for what feels like the first time in months. 

his jaw is locked, eyes watery to match mine, as he files through what he could say in response. 

“what’s even shittier is that you knew this whole time how much i loved you,” my voice cracks, a hiccup escaping my mouth. 

“loved?” he asks, sounding wounded by the past tense. and it drives me nuts that that’s what he latched onto. 

“love, you idiot,” i clarify without hesitation. “i love you so much…”

and despite how clear that confession was, haechan searches my eyes like he’s looking for more to be said. like he can easily palpate the true feelings i’ve been holding back, begging me to continue. 

“…enough to maybe overlook this.” i let go, knowing i can’t hold back any longer. 

haechan’s face shifts almost instantly, not shying away from laughing out of pure relief. “oh my god,” he gasps, taking my hands from his shirt and weaving them with his own to clutch tight to his chest. “thank god.” 

i can feel his heart racing between our hands intertwined. it feels like the same one drumming in my chest. i look at his face against the night sky and it feels both strange and comforting that he’s so freely staring at me with that lovesick look in his eyes. they sparkle like they’re mimicking the stars above him. 

“have i told you i’m sorry? i need you to know i’m sorry and that i’m going to fix everything. i promise.” he kisses my knuckles lightly, scared to push it. 

before i can respond, we both faintly hear the muffled yells of the neighborhood counting in sync. 

5!

our eyes widen simultaneously, suddenly realizing where we were and what time it was. we start laughing as the bubble around us pops.

4!

haechan shakes his head at the timing of it all, eyes bright and sparkly at the prospects. he already looks so much lighter and he looks at me like i’m a new beginning.

3!

despite all the anger i had felt for him, my body knows better and my arms make their way around his neck, lifting me up a little higher to meet his face. 

2!

his mouth parts, head cocked slightly to the side as if to ask if this was truly okay. i shyly nod and he instantly brings his hands to my waist to pull me impossibly closer. i laugh at his eagerness and i can feel the joy rumbling in his chest against mine. 

1! 

… happy new year!

a startling crack erupts above us, sending a flurry of colors into the sky. i tilt my chin to look up, but he takes this new angle to capture my lips with his instead. the new and exciting feeling of his mouth against mine sends a surge of electricity coursing through my body at a rate that matches the fireworks above. his fingers curve into my hips as if i could disappear at any moment and i cradle the nape of his neck to let him know i’m still here. 

we hear hooting and hollering, poppers going off, and champagne bottles bursting open. it feels like the whole world is celebrating us, as ridiculous as it sounds. 

my body is consumed with how much i just love kissing haechan; i can’t help the smile that makes its way onto my face, and our teeth awkwardly clink. he laughs under his breath, letting me know he feels the same, and it feels good to just rejoice in this mutual buzz. he gives me a peck on the lips, then another on my cheek, and another on my forehead. he goes for the other cheek but i meet him with my lips instead. 

“hey,” i get his attention.

his eyebrows perk and he gives me a sly look, “heyyy…”

i scoff, but it doesn’t match the giddy smile on my face. “no, dumbass. hey, don’t think this one kiss solves everything, okay?” i take him by his shoulders to put some distance between us so he knows i mean business.

“so like… 500 more kisses will do the trick or…?” he starts leaning in and i shove my hand over his mouth.

“haechan!” 

“okay, okay! i’m joking! trust,” he tears my palm off his face. “my mom already warned me that it’d take way more than this to win you back.” 

“she said that?” i snicker. 

“i told you she ripped me a new one. she didn’t need to, i knew how badly i fucked up. but she loves you almosttt as much as i do, so i don’t blame her.” he smiles, looking at me in a way i had only imagined in my dreams. 

“and you’re not… scared anymore?” 

“i am.” he says confidently, but there’s no doubt riddled on his face. “but i want this more than whatever insecurities i may have. i want you way more.” 

haechan rests his head onto mine, taking in a deep breath, “so will you have me?”

i pretend to think about it to tease him and he pokes at my side. “forgiving a cute brunette boy was actually one of my new years’ resolutions so yeah.”

“oh how gracious of you,” he jokes, hand over his heart, shaken by my generosity. “can we kiss again?”

“that’s actually another one of my-“

“oh shut up.” and i do. or really, he shuts me up.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Both you and Hyuck had your fair share of flings, yet, amusingly enough, you always ended up coming back to each other. And he liked that. There was something undeniably comforting about it, the way it felt so effortless, so familiar, like slipping into your favorite sweater on a cold day. It was simple, warm, and safe. It wasn’t complicated, it was home.

Over time, being with you felt so right that he no longer desired anyone else. Everything about your dynamic was easy and, most importantly, simple. It provided a safe haven for his fears, a sanctuary from the expectations he dreaded. Commitment was a word that stirred anxiety in him, a promise he wasn’t sure he could keep. The thought of fully opening up, of risking his heart, scared him.

So, he clung to the simplicity of what you had, where no questions were asked, and no demands were made. It was his way of staying close while keeping his fears at bay, holding on to you without the risk of losing himself.

Haechan believed that as satisfied as he was with you, you felt the same about him. In his mind, you both fit perfectly into the arrangement you had. After all, why change something that worked so well? To him, everything was simple, easy, and just the way it should be.

However, things weren't as black and white for you as they were for Haechan. Over the years, you had hoped that what you shared would evolve into something deeper, something more defined. You craved a sense of permanence, a relationship that was established, tangible, and secure. What started as a casual connection had grown into something much more significant for you, and the lack of clarity began to weigh.

While Donghyuck found comfort in the ambiguity, you found yourself longing for certainty. The undefined boundaries that once felt liberating now felt confining.

It was no secret how fond you were of him. After all, you had been together for a long time, sharing each other's highs and lows, witnessing the best and worst moments side by side. The bond you had was undeniable, and with time, you felt it was only natural to express your feelings. You thought it would be okay to bring up the idea of something more, to gently nudge the relationship in a new direction.

So, you began to hint at your desires in subtle ways, slipping them into conversations, testing the waters at every suitable opportunity. You teased him, dropping little clues, hoping he'd pick up on your intentions and reveal his own. Each time, you watched closely, searching for any sign that he might feel the same way.

You'd casually ask questions about where he thought you both would be in the future, framing it as mere "curiosity." If he ever saw you both settling down, or if he thought things might change someday. Each question was laced with hope, a subtle push toward something more concrete.

But Donghyuck deflected. He'd laugh it off, turn the conversation back to something lighthearted, or give vague answers that neither confirmed nor denied anything.

And yes, he wasn't oblivious, far from it. He noticed your hints, understood the implications, but chose to play along as if he didn't. He pretended not to see the deeper meaning behind your words, it was easier for him to feign ignorance than to confront the truth, to face the possibility that things might change in ways he wasn't ready to handle.

Plus, he couldn't quite understand why you suddenly wanted to change everything. Why complicate something that, in his eyes, was already working perfectly? There were no conflicts, no major issues between you. Why bother putting a label on your relationship when things were smooth as they were?

Donghyuck thought that if he just waited it out, the dust would settle, and you'd drop the topic. He figured things would naturally return to how they were—cuddle sessions, late-night calls, movie nights, making out and, most importantly, no difficult questions about the future. It was a cycle he found comfort in, and he was sure you'd come back to it too.

For a while, he was right. You did stop bringing up the subject, and he felt a wave of relief. Everything seemed to return to normal, the familiar rhythm of your relationship restored. He thought he had successfully navigated the storm, and things were back on track.

But the peace didn’t last long.

At first, he assumed you were just caught up with life—work, family, college—the usual exhausting demands of adulthood. It made sense that you'd take longer to respond to his texts, miss his calls, or cancel your usual meetups at each other's places. He reasoned that it was temporary, just a busy spell you were going through.

However, as time went on, the excuses didn't quite add up. The distance between you grew before he could even fully realize it. Sure, you still talked, but only through messages, as you had stopped answering his calls. Even those conversations felt different-strange, tense, lacking the warmth they once had.

It was as if you were slowly becoming strangers, the easy familiarity between you fading away. An unspoken abyss seemed to be widening, pulling you further apart with each passing day.

He couldn't understand. Was it something he did? Did he say something wrong? Did he forget an important date? No, that couldn't be it-you wouldn't be acting this way if it were something so simple. Was it about the way he avoided your questions? But he was sure he had handled that well, giving you answers that, in his mind, should have put your concerns to rest.

Donghyuck replayed every conversation in his head, searching for a clue, a moment where things might have gone wrong. He thought he had done everything right, keeping things easy and light, steering clear of anything that might cause friction. Yet, despite his efforts, the growing distance between you suggested otherwise, leaving him confused and increasingly anxious about what might have caused the shift.

Once again, he decided to leave things as they were. You might just need some time for yourself, he thought. He just needed to be patient. That was all.

So, he tried to stay calm, holding onto the hope that this was just a phase, a temporary distance that would eventually close. He reassured himself that you weren't slipping away, that he wasn't... losing you. But deep down, a quiet fear lingered, growing harder to ignore with each passing day.

At some point, it became too much for him to bear. He missed you-terribly. The ache of your absence was overwhelming, and he couldn't shake the feeling that he needed to make things right, whatever it took. He decided he would go to your place and apologize, even if he wasn't entirely sure what he had done wrong. He just knew he had to fix it.

In his mind, he planned everything meticulously. He would bring your favorite food, a small peace offering to show he cared. He would listen, really listen, to what you had to say, without deflecting or brushing things off. And then, he would apologize, sincerely, for anything he had done to hurt or upset you. He was ready to do whatever it took to mend the rift between you, to bring things back to the way they were.

And that's when things, already bad, started to get worse. As planned, he went to your favorite restaurant to pick up the peace offering. But that's when he saw you. His heart did that familiar happy dance it always did whenever you were around, but it soon came to an abrupt stop. Was he thrilled to see you after what felt like an eternity? Absolutely. What didn't sit well with him was what he was seeing.

Who was the guy you were with? Was this the reason behind the headaches, the exhaustion, the countless canceled plans? The realization hit him like a punch to the gut. Not only had you lied to him, but you were with someone he didn't even know. And worse—it was clearly a date. The way you were dressed, more put-together than usual, was a dead giveaway. This wasn't just a casual meetup; it was something more.

He noticed the way you smiled, the soft giggles that escaped your lips, the way you played with the end of your hair, something you did when you were feeling shy or nervous. He saw the subtle scrunch of your nose, a telltale sign of your genuine amusement, something he had always adored. It was everything you used to do with him, now directed toward someone else.

The sight of you laughing, seemingly carefree, with another person shattered the hope he had been clinging to, leaving him standing there, stunned and, dare he say, heartbroken. A wave of emotions crashed over him. Confusion, betrayal, an ache he couldn't ignore. But above all, there was jealousy.

It gnawed at him, a bitter, burning sensation that he couldn't shake as he watched you with someone else, sharing moments that once belonged to him and only him*.*

He knew what he had said about not being exclusive, that it was just for the sake of avoiding the labels and formalities of the situation. But this—this wasn't supposed to happen. Not when you had once casually told him that you didn't need to date anyone else when he was by your side.

He remembered the words he'd spoken about not wanting to change things, about not needing to turn what you had into a conventional romantic relationship. But even so, this—this moment—was never supposed to come.

You had felt a pair of eyes burning into the soul for a while now. You couldn't help but glance around, trying to figure out where it was coming from. But there was nothing, just a person leaving the restaurant in quick steps.

You blinked a couple of times. Was it just you, or did the back of that person look strangely familiar?

"Hey, everything okay?" Jaemin's concerned voice pulled you back, and you turned your attention to him.

Had you been missing Haechan so much that you were imagining things?

"Yeah, sorry," you said quickly, giving him a small, awkward smile. "I thought I saw someone I knew, don't worry," you waved it off, hoping he wouldn't ask more.

Jaemin smiled softly, his concern still lingering in his eyes, but he didn't push further. "Okay, if you say so," he replied gently, his voice calm and understanding, but he could tell something was off.

Here was the person who had been easing your worries these past few days. You and Jaemin had been friends for a few months now, ever since you first met at a museum. He had offered to guide you through the exhibits, sharing fascinating stories behind the artworks. At first, you assumed he worked there, only to find out later that he was just another visitor like you.

You still remembered how you had worried about taking up his time, only for him to laugh and wave off your concerns, saying it had been a fun walk. That shared experience led to more conversations, and by the end of the visit, you had exchanged numbers. What started as a casual acquaintance quickly blossomed into a comfortable friendship, one that had become a welcome refuge during the tumultuous times with Haechan.

Things with Donghyuck were... a mess, to say the least. It hadn't been as bad when you were still unaware of your true feelings for him. But once you recognized the depth of your emotions, everything became harder to bear. The weight of unspoken words and unmet desires grew heavier each day.

It only worsened when he confirmed, in his subtle yet unmistakable way, that you and he would remain in the same undefined space for the foreseeable future. The realization that nothing would change, that your relationship would stay stagnant, left you feeling trapped in a cycle of longing and frustration.

You sure liked Donghyuck, more than you ever thought you could like someone. But you couldn't keep burying yourself deeper into this hole of uncertainties. That's why, when Jaemin asked you out for the first time, you didn't refuse.

You had noticed his interest in you, and you thought, why not give it a chance? It felt like a welcome change from the storm of emotions that had been weighing you down.

And you were right. Jaemin was caring, attentive, and you shared so much in common. With him, you didn't feel the constant need to second-guess everything or wonder where you stood. He was always direct and sincere, there was no hidden meaning or unanswered questions, offering a sense of clarity that you had been craving, a simplicity that felt refreshing. It was… less intense, less complicated than it was with Haechan.

Jaemin tilted his head slightly, watching you with that warm, curious gaze he always had. “You sure you’re okay? You seem a little distracted tonight,” he asked softly, his concern evident in his tone.

You smiled, feeling a little guilty for letting your thoughts wander. “I’m fine, really. I guess I’m just a bit tired,” you said, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “But I’m having a great time with you.”

His lips curved into a gentle smile. “I’m glad to hear that. I was worried I was boring you,” he teased, a playful glint in his eyes.

“Not at all. You could probably talk about the most random thing, and I’d still be entertained,” you said, chuckling.

He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. “Oh, so you’re saying I have that kind of charm, huh?”

You rolled your eyes, laughing. “Don’t let it get to your head, Jaemin,” he laughed too, and for a moment, the tension you'd been feeling earlier seemed to fade away.

“Well, we've spent the whole day together, and it's already," he checked his wristwatch, "real late. I think it's time to take you home, princess," Jaemin said with a teasing smile, his tone light yet affectionate.

"As much as I want to say the opposite, I think you're right," you replied, letting out a small laugh. "I'd hate to turn into a pumpkin or something."

He chuckled, standing up and offering you his hand. "Don't worry, I'd make sure to bring you back to the ball before that happens."

You rolled your eyes at his playful tone but took his hand anyway, letting him guide you out of the restaurant. The evening air was cool and refreshing, and Jaemin stayed close to your side, his presence steady and comforting.

When you reached his car, he opened the door for you with a small bow, earning a laugh from you. "A true gentleman," you teased, sliding into the passenger seat. "Only the best for you," he quipped, winking before closing the door and walking around to the driver's side.

The drive home was filled with easy conversation, the kind that made time seem to slip away. Every now and then, you'd catch him glancing at you out of the corner of his eye, a soft smile tugging at his lips as if he were just happy to have you there.

“There you are,” Jaemin said as he parked in front of your house. “Safe and sound,” he added, turning to you with a warm smile.

“Aw, it’s over already?” you said dramatically, a teasing pout on your lips.

“Don’t worry,” he replied, leaning slightly closer to you, his voice dropping into that playful tone that always made you smile. “I have an idea for what we can do next week. If you’re interested, of course.”

“Oh, another date plan so soon?” you leaned closer as well, a small smile tugging at your lips.

“Mhm,” he hummed, his eyes sparkling mischievously. “But it’s a surprise, so don’t even think about asking.”

“Then you shouldn’t have told me,” you said, rolling your eyes playfully. “Now I’m curious.”

Jaemin chuckled softly, his hand reaching up to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear. His fingers lingered for a moment, just barely grazing your cheek. “I’ll make the wait worth it,” he said softly, his gaze flickering down to your lips.

The air between you shifted slightly, growing more intimate as he leaned closer and closer, his breath almost mingling with yours, his lips just a whisper away from yours and—

Knock! Knock! Knock!

“How long are you planning to stay there?”

You turned your head abruptly, your heart skipping a beat at the familiar voice. There stood Haechan, arms crossed, an annoyed expression on his face as he stared into the car.

Your chest tightened at the sight of him, but you forced yourself to play it cool, letting out a small, frustrated sigh.

Jaemin pulled back, his brow slightly raised as he glanced at Haechan, then back at you. The sudden interruption had shattered the moment.

“Friend of yours?” Jaemin asked, his voice calm but curious, as his eyes searched yours for an answer.

“Yeah, something like that," you replied, laughing awkwardly. "Remember Haechan?"

"Oh, Mr. Gray Area," Jaemin said with a knowing smirk.

“Yep, that’s him,” you said, trying to play it off with a soft chuckle before letting out a small sigh. Quickly, you unbuckled your seatbelt and reached for the door handle. “By the way, don’t leave yet. You forgot something at my house last time, I’ll take it for you real quick.”

“Alright, pretty, take your time.”

Jaemin smiled, leaning back in his seat as his gaze followed you. Meanwhile, Haechan’s eyes were also fixed on you, his arms crossed as he stood waiting. When you stopped in front of him, his brows rose expectantly.

“What are you doing here?” you whispered, trying to keep your tone neutral, though a hint of frustration slipped through.

Haechan shrugged, his expression unreadable. “You were having so many headaches, I wanted to check if you were okay,” he said, the lie rolling off his tongue smoothly.

His gaze flickered to Jaemin, still sitting in the car, who offered him a brief, polite wave. Haechan forced a tight-lipped smile, biting back the urge to roll his eyes. “And apparently, you are,” he added, his voice dropping slightly, laced with sarcasm. “Didn't know you had a thing for bulked-up gym rats. Should I start hitting the gym too, or is he the exception?"

You rolled your eyes, biting back a retort as Jaemin's curious gaze lingered from the car. "Haechan, please—"

"What?" he interrupted, leaning in slightly with a mock-innocent expression. "I just wanna make sure I'm keeping up with your new preferences.”

You lifted a hand to stop him from talking before he could say anything more, and he pressed his lips together in silence right away, though the grumpy expression on his face was impossible to miss.

"Just wait and behave," you said firmly, giving him a pointed look before turning to head inside your house.

Haechan huffed at your words but didn't argue. The moment you disappeared through the door, though, he turned back to Jaemin's car, his gaze narrowing slightly. After a brief pause, he walked closer, his shoes scuffing against the pavement, and knocked on the car window, waiting for Jaemin to lower it.

He leaned in slightly, resting his arms on the edge of the window so he could get a proper look at Jaemin.

Damn. He's hot. That, Haechan couldn't deny. What a handsome man.

Fuck.

He hoped Jaemin had a terrible personality because, honestly, it was unfair for someone to look that good and be a decent person too.

“Yes? Can I help you?” Jaemin asked, a polite smile adorning his face as his brow lifted slightly at the sudden interaction.

Haechan tilted his head, his gaze traveling up and down Jaemin’s figure, taking in every detail as if analyzing him.

“Jaemin, right?” Haechan said back, his lips curving into something between a smirk and a challenge. “Just wanted to see who’s been stealing my girl’s attention from me these days.”

Jaemin let out a small chuckle, tilting his head slightly. “Your girl? Funny, it didn’t seem that way since we started going out.”

Haechan scoffed, but he masked it with a shrug. “Well, she just likes making new friends,” he said casually, though the tightness in his jaw betrayed him.

So this was it, huh? Your sudden distance, the unanswered calls, the excuses—it was all because you’d been going on little dates with this guy. Haechan felt something unpleasant settle in his chest, but he pushed it down, keeping his expression cool.

Jaemin hummed, unfazed by Haechan’s words. His fingers tapped lazily against the steering wheel as he looked at him with mild amusement. “Is that what you tell yourself?”

Haechan let out a dry chuckle, tilting his head. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Jaemin shrugged, a knowing glint in his eyes. “Just saying… You seem a little too interested in her new friends for someone who didn’t want to put a label on things.”

Haechan’s smirk faltered for just a second, but he quickly recovered. “I just like knowing who she spends time with,” he said, his tone light, but there was an edge to it.

Jaemin chuckled, shaking his head. “Right. Well, now you know.” He leaned back in his seat, drumming his fingers against the car door. “Anything else, or can I go back to waiting for her without the interrogation?”

Haechan clicked his tongue, stuffing his hands in his pockets. He wanted to say something, anything, to wipe that amused expression off Jaemin’s face. But before he could come up with a comeback, the front door opened, and you stepped out, holding a jacket in your hands.

As soon as you saw them still talking, you narrowed your eyes. “Is everything okay?” you asked, eyeing Haechan suspiciously.

Jaemin grinned. “Depends on your definition of okay.”

Haechan just huffed, looking away. “Just having a chat,” he muttered.

You sighed, already exhausted. “I don’t even want to know,” you mumbled, handing Jaemin the jacket. “Here, you left this last time.”

Jaemin took it with a grateful smile. “Thanks, pretty.” He shot you a wink, completely ignoring Haechan’s glare.

Haechan clicked his tongue again, stuffing his hands deeper into his pockets. “Great. Now that he got what he came for, he can go,” he said, voice dripping with fake sweetness.

Jaemin raised an eyebrow but didn’t argue. “I was leaving anyway,” he said, flashing you one last smile before rolling up his window. “I’ll text you later.”

You smiled and waved as you watched Jaemin’s car disappear down the street. But the moment he was out of sight, your expression shifted, and you turned to Haechan with a sigh.

“I think you can go too,” you said, your voice even, though you weren’t exactly pleased to see him there. Even if—against your better judgment—your heart twisted in something dangerously close to happiness after so long without seeing him.

“What? Are you mad because I interrupted your little ‘date’?” Haechan scoffed, using his fingers to make exaggerated air quotes.

You rolled your eyes, letting out an exasperated sigh as you moved to walk past him, unwilling to entertain whatever mood he was in. But before you could get too far, he was quick to step in front of you, his hands gently grabbing your shoulders to stop you.

“Okay, okay! I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he said quickly, his voice softer this time, though the usual playful edge was still there. “I just wanna talk. Please?”

His puppy eyes had you folding faster than you’d like to admit. With a sigh, you cleared your throat and gently pushed his hands away, walking past him to your front door. You held it open without a word, and he didn’t waste a second following you inside.

It had only been a few weeks, but as Haechan stepped in, it felt like years since he’d last been here. Everything was the same—the familiar scent of your home, the way your shoes were neatly placed by the door, the dim lighting that made the space feel warm.

He watched as you leaned back against the couch, arms crossed, silently waiting for him to speak. The weight of your gaze made him hesitate, unsure of how to start the conversation, or if he even knew what he wanted to say in the first place.

His throat felt dry as he swallowed hard, shoving his hands deeper into his pockets while his eyes wandered around the room. “You redecorated?” he asked, his voice casual, or at least, trying to sound like it.

You raised an eyebrow. “No?”

“Ah,” he let out a small, awkward chuckle, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. “Guess it just feels different then.”

“Come on, Haechan,” you sighed, your voice steady but tired. “Just tell me what you’re doing here.”

He frowned slightly, the awkwardness that had filled the room earlier quickly fading as he stepped closer to you. The usual ease in his movements returned as he moved toward the couch.

“What do you mean, ‘what am I doing here’? I missed you,” he said, his voice sincere, genuine as he placed his hands on either side of the couch, leaning in just enough to be close, but still keeping a safe distance, his gaze never leaving yours.

You looked at him, his words hitting you more than you wanted to admit, but you forced yourself to act unimpressed. “Yeah? You came all the way here just to say that? You could’ve just texted me.”

“I did,” he shot back, his voice a little sharper now. “But you left me on read

“Then you should’ve taken the hint that I didn’t miss you.”

He let out a short laugh, though it was laced with bitterness. “Well, I noticed. You’ve been busy, huh? Going out on dates with that guy and all.” His eyes narrowed slightly, the jealousy evident in his voice. “How long have you two been meeting?”

“Why would that be any of your business?”

“I mean, it would be good to know if you started things with him while you were with me,” he said, his voice laced with something you couldn't quite decipher—hurt? Resentment? “Or if it was after you started acting like I don’t exist.”

“With you?” You let out a small, dry laugh. “Donghyuck, we were never together. You made that very clear.”

Haechan’s jaw clenched at your words. He opened his mouth to argue, but nothing came out. Because you were right. He had been the one who insisted on keeping things the way they were. No labels. No commitments. No messy emotions.

But now that he was faced with the reality of what that actually meant—you moving on, finding someone else—he hated it.

“That’s not—” He exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “That’s not fair.”

You scoffed, crossing your arms. “Oh, now it’s not fair?” You shook your head. “It was fair when I was waiting around for you to maybe want something more? When I kept dropping hints, hoping you’d stop pretending you didn’t see them?”

He pressed his lips together, his gaze dropping for a moment. He had seen them. Every single one. And he had ignored them. Every single one.

“Jaemin actually wants to be with me,” you continued, voice softer now but no less firm. “He doesn’t make me feel like I have to prove I’m worth it.”

Haechan’s chest tightened at that. “And I did?”

You didn’t answer right away. You just looked at him, and somehow, that was worse.

He hadn't realized that was how you felt. Sure, he knew he had been difficult, he never denied that, but he never thought he made you feel like you weren’t enough. He thought that by keeping things the way they were, he was protecting what you had, not slowly pushing you away.

“Listen, I…” He took a deep breath, running a hand through his hair as he tried to gather his thoughts. “I know I’m an idiot. I know I messed up, and I know I wasn’t being fair to you. I knew what you wanted, and instead of being honest, I chose to pretend I didn’t see it, because I was too scared to do anything about it.”

Your eyebrows lifted slightly in surprise. It wasn’t often that Haechan was this honest. He had always been open with you, yes, but when it came to his own emotions, his fears, his insecurities, he usually buried them under jokes, teasing, and playful distractions. But now, he was just laying it out there, no filter, no deflection.

You swallowed, arms still crossed, but your stance had softened. “…And what exactly were you so scared of?”

He swallowed hard, guilt creeping into his expression. “I didn’t want to lose you,” he admitted, voice quieter now. “I thought if we just kept things the way they were, you’d stay. That I wouldn’t have to face all the scary, complicated parts of actually being with someone.”

“So what?” still, you couldn’t let yourself be swayed so easily. Not when it had taken so much for you to finally step away. “You were scared, so that justifies everything? That makes it okay?”

“No,” he said quickly, shaking his head. “It doesn’t. And I’m not saying it does.” He ran a frustrated hand over his face before meeting your eyes again. “I just—I need you to know that it wasn’t because you weren’t enough. It was never that. It was me being a coward.”

By now, you were already softening toward him, and he could tell. His hands found your face, cupping it gently.

“I’m really sorry,” he murmured. “I swear I never meant to make you feel that way or push you away. Being without you these past days... it made me think about everything. And I already knew this, but you have no idea how much you mean to me. I realized all those doubts didn’t matter, because, God, it’s you. It’s always been you. I can’t imagine spending my life with anyone else.”

His eyes stayed locked on yours, his thumbs tracing soft circles on your cheeks. The way he was looking at you… if not love, then something dangerously close to it.

“Please, give me a chance,” he pleaded. “I know I let you down, and I know words aren’t enough to make up for everything I put you through. But I swear, I won’t mess this up again. I’ll show you—show you just how much I want you, how much you mean to me, how much…"

He took a shaky breath, his grip on your face tightening just slightly, as if afraid you’d slip away.

"How much I need you," he finally whispered. "Not just for now, not just because I miss you, but because I don’t know how to be without you anymore. Because every moment without you felt wrong, and I never want to feel that again. Just… let me prove it to you. Please."

You were speechless at his sudden confession. His eyes held the same desperate sincerity as his voice, and you could feel how genuine he was, more than you’d ever seen before. You were sure that, if you wanted, he’d drop to his knees and beg for your forgiveness. Your heart was pounding so violently, you almost felt like it might burst from your chest, just to show him how deeply he affected you without even trying.

You wanted to speak, but you couldn’t as he kept going, probably babbling at this point. “I’ll do whatever it takes to prove it to you. You want a real relationship? Let’s do it. You want commitment? I’ll give it to you. Hell, you want me to write it in the sky? Tattoo it on my forehead? I’ll—”

You interrupted him by crashing your lips against his.

His eyes widened in surprise, his breath hitching, but it took only a second for him to snap back to reality. He kissed you back just as desperately, as if he had been waiting for this moment forever. One hand slid to the small of your back, pulling you flush against him, while the other cradled the back of your neck, fingers tangling into your hair as he poured every ounce of emotion into the kiss.

You could feel the way he melted against you, how his desperation seeped into the kiss, as if he was trying to pour all the words he couldn't say into it. His grip on you tightened, like he was scared you'd slip away if he didn’t hold on tight enough.

When you finally pulled away, breathless, his lips chased yours, unwilling to let the moment end. “Does that mean…?” he whispered, eyes searching yours, still uncertain.

You exhaled, resting your forehead against his. “It means… you have a lot to make up for.”

A small, breathy chuckle left his lips, but there was no cockiness, no playfulness—just sheer relief. “I will,” he promised, his hands cradling your face as if you were the most precious thing in the world.

His lips met yours once again, this time more gently, more lovingly. He honestly felt like the luckiest person in the world right now.

He pulled away just slightly, his breath still mingling with yours. “Tell me… you and that Jaeman guy—”

“It’s Jaemin,” you corrected.

“Whatever,” he mumbled, brushing it off. “You and Minjae… how far did you go?” His brows lifted slightly, his thumb grazing your lower lip.

You exhaled a soft laugh. “Is it really important?”

“Very much,” he murmured, tilting his head as his fingers trailed down your jaw. “I need to erase every trace of him off you.”

You rolled your eyes, trying, and failing, to hide the small smile creeping up on your lips. “We didn’t do much more than a few pecks…” you admitted.

Haechan groaned dramatically, as if your words physically pained him. “A few pecks?” he repeated, shaking his head. “Disgusting. Unacceptable.”

Before you could roll your eyes again, he was on you, pressing kiss after kiss against your lips, barely giving you a chance to breathe. Each one was soft yet desperate, as if he were really trying to erase every trace of Jaemin’s touch, replacing every memory with his own.

You let out a breathless laugh, trying to push him away, but he was relentless. He peppered kisses along your cheeks, your chin, your nose, your forehead—everywhere he could reach.

“Okay, stop!” you giggled, placing your hand over his mouth to halt his attack. “I get it already.”

His eyes sparkled with mischief as he kissed your palm, his lips lingering against your skin.

“I'm making sure there's no room left for Jaeman.”

Jaemin glanced at his phone screen, checking the time for what felt like the hundredth time. His foot tapped against the floor, his eyes flickering to the entrance every time the bell chimed, expecting—no, hoping—to finally see the person he had been so anxiously waiting for: you.

Don’t get him wrong, he was always excited to see you. But today, that excitement was laced with unease. That feeling had settled in his chest the moment you called him, asking to meet. Usually, just the thought of seeing you would have him grinning like an idiot, but something in your tone during that call had put him on edge. There was a distance in your voice, something careful, something that made his nerves spike.

It didn’t help that it had been days since the last time you properly talked or spent time together. That alone was enough to make him feel uneasy. And now, as he sat there waiting, he couldn’t shake the feeling that this meeting wouldn’t be the kind he was hoping for.

He shook his head slightly, trying to push away the nagging thoughts. Maybe he was just overthinking. Maybe you just wanted to see him because you missed him, just like he missed you. And honestly? That was reason enough for him.

The bell rang again, and this time, when he looked up, there you were. His heart did that little flip it always did whenever he saw you, no matter how much he tried to play it cool. He knew you hadn’t known each other for that long, your time together still fresh and new, but there was something about you that made it feel different.

He called your name and waved to catch your attention, his smile appearing almost instantly as soon as he saw yours. You hurried toward the table, slipping into the seat across from him.

"I'm sorry, did I make you wait too long?" you asked, slightly out of breath. "Something came up, and I couldn't help but be late."

That something had a name and a surname—Lee Donghyuck.

The very person who insisted on accompanying you and personally driving you to the café as soon as you mentioned needing to see Jaemin. Not only did he take the longest route possible, driving at a frustratingly slow pace, but he also kept you trapped in the car, stealing kisses and whining about why you had to see Jaemin at all.

You almost had to beg him not to follow you inside the café, and it took a mix of stern scolding and a few more stolen kisses before you were finally free from his relentless affection.

Jaemin chuckled softly, shaking his head and dismissing your apology with a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, I didn’t wait that long,” he said, his words making you exhale in relief. “Is everything okay? We haven’t really talked much these past few days.”

You smiled sheepishly. “Oh, yes, sorry. It’s just… a lot’s happened, and I didn’t really have the time to catch up with anyone,” you explained with a light chuckle.

Jaemin’s expression softened, and a hint of relief washed over him. “I’m glad it’s just that,” he said, his tone light. “I thought maybe I did something wrong, messed things up between us.”

You couldn’t help but feel a small pang in your chest at his words. He really did care, of course.

“No, nothing like that. It’s just… things have been a bit complicated lately,” you hesitated for a moment, then decided to be honest. “And I just needed some space to think about… us.”

Jaemin's smile faltered just slightly as he noticed the way you fidgeted with the napkin, your lips pressing into a thin line. The way you avoided his gaze for a moment, only to return to meet his eyes, told him everything he needed to know. He was right—this was going to be an unpleasant conversation.

He remained silent, his gaze steady and attentive, nodding slowly as he listened carefully to every word you said. He could tell that you had thought this through, giving you the space you needed to speak without feeling rushed.

“Look, I really enjoyed our time together, it was honestly so much fun, and you’re such a sweet person, but…” You paused for a brief moment, your mind drifting to the little gremlin waiting for you in the car outside the cafe. “I have someone I care deeply about, despite everything that happened. I want to give it a real shot, because… that’s what I’ve been waiting for. And I really thought I was ready to make things work with you, but I can’t do that when my heart belongs to another person.”

“… I see.” His words were simple, but they carried a certain weight. There was no anger, no resentment, just quiet understanding and a hint of sadness. “I guess I can’t really argue with that, can I?”

You watched as he leaned back in his seat, exhaling a slow breath. His expression was composed, but the way his fingers tapped idly against the table gave him away. He looked… upset. Maybe even hurt. You knew you were doing the right thing, but it didn’t make it any easier.

“It’s not that I don’t like you,” you blurted out, feeling the need to clarify. “You are amazing, Jaemin, and you deserve someone just as good as you are. And I’m not—”

“It’s fine,” he interrupted gently, offering you a small chuckle—one that didn’t quite reach his eyes. He had noticed the way you were starting to fidget, your nervousness creeping in. “I don’t want you to feel like you’re doing something wrong. I appreciate your honesty. I can’t say I’m happy about it, but… I kind of saw this coming.”

You frowned slightly. “What do you mean?”

Jaemin tilted his head, studying you for a moment before giving you a knowing smile. “It’s Haechan, isn’t it? The person you were just talking about.”

You nodded sheepishly. Was it really that obvious?

He let out another small chuckle, shaking his head. “Yeah… I had a feeling. Especially after our last encounter,” he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck before meeting your gaze again. “Honestly? I wish things were different. I really do. But I get it,” his voice softened. “When someone already has your heart, there’s not much room left for anyone else, is there?”

You had prepared yourself for anger, maybe even disappointment, but this quiet acceptance made it so much harder.

“I really am sorry,” you whispered.

He offered you a small, bittersweet smile. “Don’t be. Just… be happy, alright?” He reached across the table and gave your hand a small squeeze before pulling away. “And if he ever messes up, I’ll be right here to say ‘I told you so,’” he smirked.

You let out a soft chuckle, shaking your head. “Noted.” Then, hesitating for a moment, you asked, “Would it be stupid of me to ask if we can still be friends?”

Jaemin blinked, then huffed a small laugh. “No, of course not,” he said, his voice softer now. “I’d love that.”

You felt a weight lift off your shoulders at his words, though the guilt still lingered. You had expected this conversation to go much worse—maybe some resentment, maybe some bitterness—but Jaemin was handling it with the same grace and kindness he had always shown you.

“Thank you,” you said sincerely. “For understanding. For everything, really.”

Jaemin leaned back, a fond but slightly teasing smile playing on his lips. “Well, I can’t say I’m thrilled about the outcome, but I meant what I said. I want you to be happy.” He tilted his head, eyes twinkling just a little. “Even if it’s with him.”

You laughed softly, shaking your head. “You’re making it sound like I chose the worst possible person.”

Jaemin shrugged. “I don’t hate the guy. But let’s just say he’s not exactly my first pick for you.”

“Fair enough,” you admitted, biting back another chuckle.

A comfortable silence settled between you two, and you felt grateful that, despite everything, Jaemin was still Jaemin—kind, understanding, and someone you truly wanted to keep in your life.

Donghyuck jolted in his seat when he glanced at the rearview mirror and saw you saying goodbye to his number one enemy. He clicked his tongue, muttering something under his breath, before quickly looking away as you slid into the car. He tried to act nonchalant, though the urge to have his hands all over you was undeniable.

“So?” He raised his brows, his voice thick with curiosity as he glanced at your smiling face. His mind cursed Jaemin a thousand times over, though he tried to hide it behind a playful demeanor.

“Well, he was very lovely the whole time,” you said, pulling your seatbelt across your body. “And we agreed to stay friends.”

The words hit him like a breath of fresh air, and he let out a relieved sigh, not bothering to hide it this time. For a moment there, he thought you might change your mind, and he’d be left in misery forever.

"Good," he muttered, his grip on the wheel loosening, his gaze softening as he glanced over at you. “So, I behaved as you said and I patiently waited for you here, do I deserve my reward now?”

You shot him a teasing smile, leaning back in your seat. “Oh? You think you deserve a reward just for waiting?”

He pouted, though it only made him look more endearing. “Come on, you can’t leave me hanging like this. I’ve been a perfect gentleman,” he said, his voice playful yet sincere.

You couldn't help but roll your eyes, but the smile that tugged at your lips betrayed you. “Alright, alright. You did alright, I guess.”

By now, he was already leaning closer, his breath brushing against your lips. Without missing a beat, you cupped his face in your hands and pulled him in for a deep, searing kiss. Haechan couldn't help but smile into it, feeling his heart race.

He must admit, he really like it this way.

Mark helps one of his kids press their palms onto the wall. When they release their palm, pink paint remains, making a sort of leaf to the tree branches painted onto the wall.

“Now write your name,” Mark advises another kid, whose orange paint had already dried.

“G-R-A-H-A-M,” the boy writes out with a large permanent marker. “Can I take a picture? For my mom?”

All the rest of the children begin to shout their agreements, also wanting to bring home a picture for their parents. Mark grabs his yellow Polaroid camera and takes a picture of each handprint.

He keeps all of the pictures in the chest pocket of his denim jacket. “Okay, guys— to the sink! Whoever has the cleanest hands gets to help me pass out snacks!”

“Why are we having snack time so early?” It’s Graham that asks, the little one always eager to be around Mark.

Mark ignores the boy’s paint covered hands poking at his clean jacket, and answers him as politely as he can. “Mr. Lee forgot his lesson plans today, so we’re going to watch a movie instead.”

“A movie?” Graham’s eyes widen.

“Yep,” Mark giggles. He crouches down to Graham’s level and whispers, “You wanna pick it?”

“Nature Nut!” Graham cheers almost immediately, causing Mark to wince.

Ah, yes, the wonderful little DVDs of a lonesome man teaching the watcher about bugs and weird types of slugs. Mark actually has the entire collection, and Graham happens to adore them just as much as Mark did when he was a kid.

“Alright, go wash your hands and I’ll get it started.”

It’s a little girl named Hana who cleans her hands the best, so she passes out organic fruit gummies to everyone while Mark puts in the DVD.

While they watch the video, Mark checks his text messages.

There’s one from Taeyong: “I’ve already got Haechan on the couch. Sorry, man. You can have the floor, but it’s not gonna be comfy :(“

Right. Mark forgot that Haechan lives in the same complex as him. His apartment is probably just as flooded as Mark’s is. Now if the landlord would just answer his calls and help him... maybe this situation wouldn’t be so stressful.

Mark didn’t forget his lesson plans; they’re just submerged in his bedroom with everything else Mark has left lying on his carpet. And maybe it’s his fault for not buying more storage bins, but a studio apartment can only hold so much stuff.

Serves Mark right for doing his lesson plans at home instead of at the school like most of his fellow kindergarten teachers.

He lets out a quiet sigh, careful not to disturb the children. He only has a short list of friends left to ask, and while he doesn’t think they’ll mind him asking, he really hates to put anyone in that position.

Besides, most of his friends have roommates or significant others and Mark doesn’t want to ruin their routine. He’d hate to intrude. And he could always sleep in his car for a few days, but the amount of stuff he had to pack because of the flooding has barred any chance of a good night’s sleep.

The video ends, and Mark gets the kids seated with coloring pages until their parents arrive.

One by one, he I.Ds the parents and tells the kids goodbye, helping them put on their coats and take home whatever library book they picked out earlier.

Finally, there’s only one kid left, and Mark is a bit embarrassed of his hyper-awareness to Graham. It’s not even his fault, really. Graham just has a beautiful mom, who happens to be Mark’s beautiful friend, and sometimes Mark gets eager to see you during pickup time.

Whatever. It’s no big deal.

The kindergartener already has his coat on. His curly brown hair is almost unruly as he continues to work on his coloring sheet.

Mark pulls at the hem of his sage sweater sleeves and wonders if his hair looks okay. Maybe he should invest in a little desk mirror; or maybe that’s vain.

“Hey, Mark! Sorry I’m late!” You rush in, holding on to your leather messenger bag. You fix your glasses before they fall off the bridge of your nose, and Mark is so focused on the movement that he almost forgets about your child.

Until said child is scolding his mother. “Mom! You have to call him Mr. Lee! It’s rude to call him Mark!”

“Your mom is an adult,” Mark reminds Graham (as soon as he finds his voice.) “Since she isn’t a student, it’s okay for her to call me Mark.”

Graham pinches his lips together, and then shrugs. “Fine. Mom, we watched Nature Nut today.” He runs up to you and wraps his arm around your middle. “Can we go to the park and look for slugs?”

“Sure,” you giggle. “But we need to get home soon, okay, Bud? I have to make dinner and then we have to clean up the mess we made last night.”

Graham turns to Mark and smiles naughtily, like the trickster he often is. “Mom said I could tear up her papers last night. She said it’s There-pee.”

“Ther-a-py,” you emphasize for the five-year-old.

Mark studies your face, and he can tell that you seem a little more stressed than usual. “Therapy, huh?”

You smile sheepishly. “Well, when your son catches you tearing up old love notes, you have to let him in on the fun, right?”

“You are a team,” Mark acknowledges. He wants to ask more; wants to dig into your heart and extract whatever is hurting you, but your son is standing between the two of you, waiting for him to say goodbye. Mark clears his throat and picks at his sweater again. “Anyways, uh, text me tonight? Let me know you two got home safe. And, I’ll see you both tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” you breathe. You smile at him and then take Graham’s hand. “Thanks, Mark. I’ll text you.”

Mark spends the night at a motel down the road. He texts a few of his friends and hopes for good news in the morning, or at least a confirmation from his landlord.

When you text him, a little selfie of you and Graham, holding up what looks like microwaved s’mores, his heart grows fond, and he forgets about his own problems for a moment.

-

Life has never been very easy for you. From the get-go, you have always been destined to fail, growing up with an absent father and an overworked mother. With a dead-end dream like yours (writing, of all things), it’s no wonder you clung to what little breaths of freedom you had.

He was handsome and bold, with a carefree smile and brown eyes that mirrored the sun. The lead singer of a band, with a voice like chimes. And you fell just as hard as one of your many protagonists. Perhaps the mistake always lay in the fact that you put too much fantasy into reality. You have always romanticized the littlest things, and that comes back to bite you more often than not.

You never expected one: to get pregnant your senior year of high school, and two: have to go through it alone.

Of course, most people you come to love leave eventually. It’s something you have always remembered; something that sticks in the back of your brain like gum to the bottom of your child’s Spider-man skechers.

Graham is the only constant in your life. Though you’ve been blessed with a decent job editing for a webazine company, and you can work from home more often than not, Graham is the real thing that keeps you alive.

He’s the most precious boy, with brown curls and big brown eyes. He favors his father, and though that should deter you, it reminds you of innocent days, and it gives a new meaning to brown eyes. Graham is not his father, and he never was.

Graham certainly got his love of learning from you. Though he likes science more than writing, you adore how eager he is to always get to school. It helps that Mark is his teacher.

Mark’s been your friend since freshman year of highschool, when the two of you both took the same creative writing class the local university offered. Though the two of you had differing end goals, you often studied together and encouraged each other. He was there when you found out you were pregnant, and he was there when you found out you’d be raising your child alone.

Now life comes full circle, and you see him twice a day. You could go out on a limb and say he brightens up most mornings, but you would still give that slot to your son.

Mark is standing at the doorway now, greeting all of his students and helping them take off their book bags and coats. He’s wearing monochrome today: red pants, a red sweater, and red shoes.

Graham lights up almost immediately, and you are thankful today that you decided to dress Graham in his red t-shirt. “Mom! We match!”

“I know,” you grin, squeezing his hand.

Mark glances at Graham, and then you. His cheeks showcase that same pink hue they always do, and while it should clash with his red garments, it doesn’t. “Hey, Mark.”

“Hey,” he grins, cheeks full at the sight of you two.

Graham spreads his arms and waits for Mark to help him take off his jacket. “Do you see that we match, Mr. Lee?”

“Yo, that’s awesome, Little Man!” Mark gives Graham a fist bump that seems to appease him, and you wait for Graham to run to his friends before addressing Mark.

“How have you been?”

Mark sighs. He brushes his hair away from his eyes. “Okay. My- uh- my studio apartment flooded so I’m staying at a motel until my landlord can get me estimates on when I can come back home.”

“That sucks,” you frown. “You know, if you need a place to stay, I have a pullout couch in my office. And obviously, Graham wouldn’t mind.”

Mark pales. “Are you serious? I didn’t mean to suggest anything, Like I know you work from home and you need your office.”

“And you’ll be at school until three,” you say. “I’ll work then. C’mon, Mark. I don’t like knowing one of my friends has no place to stay.”

Mark bites his bottom lip and scratches the back of his neck. “Yeah. Okay. I’ll drive over after I check out of the motel.”

“Great!” You smile. “I’ll order pizza.”

-

"Graham, clean your room," you say, struggling to push your desk against your office wall. "We're going to have a guest for a few weeks."

"Mom," Graham whines, "They aren't going to look in my room."

You begin to take the cushions out of the spare couch to start setting up the pull-out bed. "Mr. Lee is coming over, Graham.  Don't you want to show him your collections?"

Graham's brown eyes grow wide. "Mr. Lee? You didn't tell me he was coming!"

"He's going to be staying with us for a little bit, okay? So I need you to be on your best behavior."

“Can I show him my worms?” Graham asks, alluding to the compost bin in the small backyard of your townhouse.

“Yes,” you say, thankful that he isn’t putting up much of a fight toward cleaning. You’re also thankful he isn’t asking any questions, as Graham always seems to have a few at the top of his tongue.

Graham cleans up his room quickly. You know for a fact that he’s just shoved all of his toys under his bed, but it’s enough until the weekend, when you’ll have more time to help him organize.

The little guy hoards rocks like no one’s business. You curse the day Mark decided to teach the kids about geodes.

“Wanna help me make up Mr. Lee’s room?” You half-yell, while grabbing spare bedding out of your linen closet.

Graham’s little footsteps are heard before he answers, and soon he’s at your hip with a quick, “He can have my Frozen pillowcase!”

You hesitate to tell Graham that his Frozen pillowcase is currently on one of your pillows, and you can’t give your guest a dirty pillowcase. “That one is in the wash, Buddy. Why don’t we give him your Spider-Man one?”

“So he matches my pajamas!” Graham is easily pleased, and he even takes one of his stuffed bears to add to Mark’s made-up bed. (“So he doesn’t get scared at night.”)

By the time the pizza arrives, Mark is just behind, so you keep Graham busy with a slice of cheese and a glass of diet pepsi (only half of a can, and only because it’s a special occasion) while the two of you bring in Mark’s stuff.

He surprisingly didn’t bring much, and when you ask about it, he grimaces. “My studio is pretty small so a lot of my stuff was on the ground and got mildewed. Other stuff was in bins so I just left it there. I only need clothes and my lesson plans, anyway.”

“Well, here’s the desk and bed. It’s not much, but there’s a lock on the door in case Graham ever gets too inquisitive — bless him — and curtains so the stupidly bright sun won’t wake you too early.”

“Those both sound like personal experiences, Y/n,” Mark teases. He takes off his jacket and throws it on the bed. “Yo! Spider-Man?”

“Graham picked it out,” you say. “He also relinquished one of his bears to keep you safe in the middle of the night. His words, not mine.”

“He’s so cute,” Mark mentions offhandedly. The fondness in his tone takes you back a bit. Not because the phrase isn’t true, it’s just that most people find your son annoying before they find him endearing. The change of tone is nice.

“He is,” you say. “And he’s dying to show you his room after we eat dinner.”

Mark gives you that same lopsided smile he often had in high school. Part of your brain shifts to his personal life, and you wonder why Mark himself isn’t in a romantic relationship. Not that he has to be, but the both of you are getting older, and Mark has always been one to express a fondness for having his own family one day. Maybe he just hasn’t found the right person.

It isn’t until Graham is peacefully in bed — after a very chaotic reading of Goodnight Moon by yours truly, and an argument that Mr. Lee cannot, in fact, sleep in the same room as him — that you actually have a chance to show Mark around the house.

“Here’s the guest bathroom. Graham almost always uses the bathroom in my room because he likes looking at the big tub. He will beg you to play with him, but if you’re busy don’t feel guilty telling him no. He knows what no means and he’s good about playing by himself.”

Mark giggles. “Okay. I don’t mind playing with him, though.“

You show him around the kitchen, where you left little spaces for him in the pantry. You show him the garbage bags and the T.V. settings and the list of compostable ingredients. “And also, please come and go as you please. Like, I completely understand that you’re here temporarily and you aren’t a babysitter or anything like that. I don’t expect you to be in charge of Graham any time outside of school.”

Mark blinks. “But if you ever need time away, you can ask me. I don’t mind babysitting.”

“I know,” you smile. “But Graham is my kid. I don’t need time away from him.”

You’re lying. Mark knows it. You’ve been in this single parenting thing for five years and you aren’t about to reach out for help now.

“Anyways, if you have any questions just ring me or ask me,” you say. “I’ve got to get to bed. Goodnight.”

“Thanks, Y/n.”

-

Mark thinks it’s sweet the way Graham insists on making his own breakfast.

You’re already up when Mark gets out of his (temporary) bedroom with his clothes tucked under his arm. You’re busy arguing with Graham. “You can’t fry your own omelette for the last time.”

Mark quirks an eyebrow at your exasperated face. You look stressed beyond belief, even though the day has just begun.

Mark tosses his clothes back in his room and walks into the kitchen. “Hey, Graham! Do you want to show me your rock collection?”

Graham spins on his sock-clad heels, eyes bright at the thought of seeing his teacher. “Mr. Lee! Yes! Let’s go!”

He grabs Mark’s hand with ease, leaving you room to finish making breakfast.

Graham’s room is fairly simple. The small wooden bed is covered in a green quilt, and beneath that, frozen-printed sheets that certainly don’t match. He has a tub of stuffed animals shoved against a small dresser.

Mark gets distracted by the framed picture on top of the dresser. It’s a picture of you and Graham’s father, a few months before you got pregnant. He’s smiling, and you’re holding up a peace sign. It makes Mark feel a bit sad, knowing that Graham’s dad never stayed around to see how wonderful he turned out to be. Then again, a lot of people in your life left as soon as they found out. In high school, no one wants to be friends with a teenage mother.

Mark reckons that if he had a family like this, he’d never take them for granted.

Graham pulls out a gemstone. It’s a murky green one that Mark has let him take home from class. “Do you remember this, Mr. Lee?”

Mark grins. “Yeah, bud. Thanks for keeping it so safe for me.”

Graham beams. He grabs Mark’s hand and pulls him towards his dresser. “Can we match? I want to look like you.”

Mark feels his heart swell. He wants to smother the young boy in affection, but he doesn’t want to cross a line. He’s your friend, sure, but he’s also Graham’s teacher. He can’t coddle Graham more than the other children. He already has a godchild to coddle. “I’m wearing yellow today. Do you have any yellow clothes?”

“Let’s look!” Graham yanks open one of the drawers and begins pulling out the articles of clothing one by one. “No, no, no... Here!” He finds a pair of yellow overalls, folded amongst the mess he made. “I’ll wear these!”

“Let’s clean up first, okay?” Mark grabs the overalls. “So it’s clean when you come home from school.”

Graham, looking like the last thing he’d ever want to do is disappoint Mark, begins to pick up each shirt with obvious intent. He tries to fold them, and does a somewhat decent job, so much so that Mark leaves it, thinking you’ll find it endearing rather than annoying.

He really loves that about you. He likes your patience with Graham. You’re so young, and in reality, he squashed so many early dreams of yours. No matter your lot in life, you never blamed your child. Mark thinks that’s why Graham is so open, so adaptable, so endearing.

He helps Graham get dressed and leaves him in his room so that he, himself, can get ready.

When he emerges from his shower, hair wet and clothed in yellow, he smells something amazing.

He doesn’t want to intrude on your morning with Graham. He already feels too indebted to you already.

“Have an omelet,” you say. Wisps of hair cover your face. You place a plate down in front of him.

Graham is already eating his omelet, slowly, while flipping through a picture book. He sounds out words he recognizes, but stays silent the rest of the time.

Mark takes out his phone and scrolls through his instagram feed just as your own phone begins to ring.

“Shit,” you curse, and then immediately apologize to Graham. You press the red button and tap anxiously on the tabletop.

“Everything okay?” Mark asks.

You run your hands over your hair and let them rest on the back of your neck. “Yeah is just—“

The phone rings again, and this time you pick it up. “What do you want? ... Why would you tell me that? ... Why should I care? ... Please stop contacting me, okay? Goodbye.”

You slam the phone down and leave the room. Mark watches you disappear down the hallway, sniffling.

“Mommy is upset,” Graham says. He looks at Mark, lip quivering. “At me?”

“No, Buddy! Of course not!” Mark reaches over the table to ruffle Graham’s curls. “Never at you.”

“When we tore up paper, she was crying.” Graham fiddles with his book page.

Mark wonders why your ex’s actions are being brought up five years later. Last he heard, you had fully healed from the breakup long before Graham’s first birthday. But now he’s about to be six, and you're suddenly upset?

He’ll have to ask you about it soon.

“Are you ready to go to school, Buddy?”

“Yeah!”

-

You cradle your face in your hands and try to ease the tears back in. You’ll never get this article proofread and sent if you can’t see the keys.

The door opens, and Graham runs in just in time for you to finish wiping your eyes. “Hey, kiddo! How was school?”

“Mr. Lee let us finger paint!” Graham holds up his palm, covered in dried paint, and grins brightly. “Can I have gogurt?”

“Yeah bud. Why don’t you put something on the T.V.? You can have your snack in the living room today.”

“Yes!” Graham takes blueberry gogurt out of the fridge and — after getting you to tear it open — runs into the living room. Sneakers and backpack still on.

Mark trails behind, clutching a messenger bag to his chest. “What’s going on?”

You sigh and close the laptop. The manuscript will have to wait. “Ben called. About a week ago. His girlfriend is pregnant. Called me to tell me he wasn’t going to leave her— like that would heal what he did to me. Then he called this morning to tell me they’re engaged.” You burst into tears then, and you feel so pathetic for doing this in front of your old schoolmate, that you hide your face behind your palms and allow your shoulders to shake. “Why weren’t we enough? Why wasn’t I enough?”

Mark scoots one of the chairs in front of you and sits, leaning his elbows on his knees. “Hey. Look at me.” With gentle hands, he grabs your wrists and pulls them away from your face. “It is not your fault he left.”

“But it has to be me in some way,” you retort. “He must not have loved me. Something, because now he’s going to raise her child after he left mine. Graham deserves a dad.”

Mark places his forehead against yours. The two of you used to do it all the time in school, mostly with immature giggles in the spaces between, but now it’s heavy with intention. “Graham has not felt even a little bit unloved in your care. You are all he needs, okay? You’re amazing.”

You nod, head still pressed to Mark’s. “Yeah. Okay. Sorry for getting too emotional, there.”

“Be as emotional as you want,” Mark says. “I’ll be here to balance you out.”

Your heart stutters at the words, like maybe they mean something more than he’s letting on. Of course it’s stupid to think Mark Lee would ever even consider you, but just the knowledge that he cares makes your soul feel a little lighter.

“I’m a mess,” you stutter, bringing your fist up to wipe at your nose.

“Nah,” Mark grins. He runs the pad of his thumb across your cheek and grins. “You’re alright.”

-

“It’s snowing!” Graham wakes Mark up by jumping on his chest.

Mark sucks in a breath, winded at the sudden weight, and grabs the boy, lifting him off of his chest and onto the mattress. “Hey, Buddy. Let’s not jump on sleeping people, okay?”

“Okay,” Graham says. He’s already lost interest in Mark, now crawling off of the bed to open the blinds. “Come look at the snow!”

“I see!” Mark rubs his tired eyes and checks his watch. “We might have a snow day, Graham.”

“Yes!” Graham pumps his fist into the air. “Let’s go tell mom!”

You’re sitting on your bed, chewing on a red licorice rope and flipping through a fashion magazine. You look up when Mark and Graham enter.

Mark likes seeing you like this: the domesticity of you in the morning, lazy and true. His chest sparks when he thinks this may be one of the only moments he can capture you like this, so he intends to commit the sight to memory.

“Did I hear snow day?” You grin at Mark, childlike wit in your own eyes — the same as your son’s.

“Looks like it.” Mark rolls up the sleeves of the sweater he slept in. “You want pancakes? I make some mean chocolate chip pancakes.”

You shift your gaze away from his arms and clear your throat. “Uh, yeah. Just let me get dressed and I’ll help—“

“No need,” Mark insists. “Enjoy your quiet time. Graham and I will make the most delicious pancakes you’ve ever tasted.”

“With lots of chocolate chips!” Graham shouts.

You give him a pointed look. “But not too many.”

Graham huffs. “But not too many,” he repeats.

-

Momentary splashes sound from your bathroom, followed by Graham screaming “It’s a dragon! Run for cover!”

Mark giggles from his place on the couch. He’s got mushroom-patterned socks on, and he’s tucked up into the cushions, nursing a can of Monster. “How does he still have so much energy?”

You sigh and pull your beanie down over your forehead. “You’d think a snow day would tire him out. Thanks for constantly carrying him up the hill, by the way. I know you’re a teacher, but sometimes I forget how good you are with kids.”

“I do have a godson,” Mark reminds you.

“But Mikey is a baby,” you say. You only know the baby’s name because of Mark’s constant snap stories about him.

“Most babies and kids want the same thing. Affection and attention.” Mark scoots over to the edge of the couch and pats the cushion.

You sit next to him. “I guess that’s true. You’re really good with Graham. He’s not this open to other adults.”

Mark is clearly blushing now; you can see his pink cheeks even in the light of the television. “He’s great in class, always helping the other kids.”

“He wants to impress you,” you say. You pop open a can of orange soda and take a sip. “He thinks you’re just the coolest guy.”

Mark laughs and shakes his head. “Didn’t you hear, Y/n? I’m handsome and cool.”

“Oh, of course,” you nudge his shin with our own sock-clad foot. “How could I forget? Mr. Ladies Man in high school.”

This makes Mark blush even harder, because he most certainly was not a ladies man in high school. In fact, he was a nerd in all senses of the word, part of the debate club with a few other boys. He had a few dates here and there, but nothing ever stuck.

“Shut up,” he mumbles. “My time is gonna come.”

“Hasn’t it already?” you ask before you can really process your own words. But of course he knows that he’s grown into his face, right?

Mark is positively handsome, eyes bright and lashes long. He’s so warm and comforting to you. He must be just as comforting to everyone else.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re handsome, Mark,” you say plainly.

“You mean that?”

“Of course I do,” you say. “Why would I lie?”

Mark opens his mouth, perhaps to call you out. To tell you you’ve been too honest, but he’s interrupted by your son.

“Mom! I’m ready to get out now!”

“I should go,” you say, still looking at his eyes.

“Yeah,” he says. His sweater has small spots on the shoulders where snow has fallen and since melted. He shivers.

“You should take a shower. You’ll catch a cold.”

“Okay,” he whispers. “Yeah, I’ll do that.”

-

Haechan comes over the following Saturday night to hang out with Mark, and you’re surprised at how much he truly hasn’t changed since high school.

He’s still got infamously perfect eyebrows, and his voice is still high despite its blunt sarcasm. “Nice place.” He raises his brows as he looks around.

“Who are you?” Graham is sitting at the kitchen table, watching Minecraft playthroughs (kid-friendly ones you’ve watched through yourself) on your phone to entertain himself while you clean.

“I’m Haechan, Mark’s friend.”

“This is Mr. Lee’s friend from school,” you say, detailing your words so they’re easier for your son to digest.

Graham stares at him for a moment, not quite judging but not quite accepting either. “Okay. Do you want to see my rock collection?”

Haechan looks genuinely excited, and accepts before you can come up with an excuse for him. Graham tells Haechan to stay in the kitchen while he grabs all of his rocks.

“How have you been?” you ask the taller man. “Like, with the flooding and everything?”

“Well, I’m on a couch at Taeyong’s, which is good since he doesn’t charge rent. But that means I’m near Mikey, and that baby has some lungs.”

You laugh. “I remember when Graham was a baby. I was so young, and my mom told me it was my responsibility to wake up and take care of him whenever he cried in the middle of the night. I was so pissed at her for making me do that, but those were some of the best nights to bond with him.” You realize you’re rambling and shake your head. “Whatever. Baby screams are loud as hell.”

“You can say that again. I’ve been talking to my friend Johnny about taking his spare room and paying rent. I dunno how many more sleepless nights I can take.”

“Why would you need to pay rent if you’re just crashing?” You wipe down the kitchen table to keep yourself busy.

“Didn’t Mark tell you? Our landlord is in heaps of trouble because the pipes weren’t up to code and that’s why they busted. The damage is basically too expensive to fix, so we’ve got to find new places.”

You stop cleaning. “Mark didn’t tell me that.”

“Oh.” Haechan scratches his brow. “He probably didn’t want to worry you. He feels really bad that he’s stayed with you this long.”

“It’s only been a month or so,” you counter. “Besides, Mark’s a great housemate. He cleans and keeps Graham occupied. Plus, now I have someone to watch corny game shows with.”

Haechan grins. “Oh. Okay, I get it.”

“Get what?” Mark, finally out of the shower, steps into the kitchen and immediately tackles Haechan in an energized hug.

“Nothing!” Haechan’s voice cracks

You shoot Haechan a weird look, and change the subject. “Where are you guys going?”

“To play video games at Johnny’s.” Mark says, and the thrill in his voice makes you think of high school. Of the debate team bus rounding the corner. Of you standing there, waiting to congratulate him with a big hug and a frosty from Wendy’s.

You miss it. “Have fun, okay? I’m probably going to tuck in as soon as Graham does, so just let yourself in.”

“You’re leaving?” Graham comes in, and his arms are filled with smooth and rough stones and gems he’s both found by himself and bought at random general stores while traveling.

“Not before I see your rocks!” Haechan says with so much enthusiasm, you think he’s telling the truth.

Graham giggles and drops the rocks onto the ground. Of course, he wants your guest to sit on the floor and count rocks. You’re almost embarrassed.

“ ‘ Okay, Y/n?” Mark laughs at your expression. Then he places his arm on your shoulder, thumbs the skin of your upper arm.

And once again, it’s high school. It’s senior year graduation and Mark is the only one who congratulates you. It’s his comforting touch, him coming over in the middle of the night after you texted him a picture of your first sonogram. It’s that same comforting touch. That little “I’m here,” and it melts you on the inside, leaves you in the shell of an eighteen girl again. Scared, and worried, and a little less alone.

“Yeah,” you manage. “I’m okay.”

-

The television plays Cartoon Network reruns on a low hum. Mark is curled up in a blanket, nursing a bottle of water and thinking over Haechan’s words.

You’ve liked her since high school, dude.

Which is a complete lie. Seriously, Mark didn’t have a crush on you in high school. He would know if he had a crush on his best friend. You’ve been his friend since freshman year, and that’s all you’ve ever been.

Now in college, it was different. In college, Mark was alone in a dorm with Taeyong, and you were one of the only people from high school he stayed in contact with. In college, he would bring you your favorite snacks and drinks, and other things you would forget to buy because you were a part-time student and a full-time mom. In college, you would pull all-nighters with him, working on your exams while Graham was asleep, then using energy drinks to get through the next day.

Mark even remembers the time your mom caught the three of you fast asleep on your rug, with unopened monster cans and an empty milk bottle beside you.

Throughout your entire pregnancy he was warned not to stay friends with the pregnant girl — it’d be too much for him, he wouldn’t want to become the new father, and all kinds of other stuff people would mumble to him when you weren’t around.

But you never expected him to be anything other than your friend. You never asked him for the help he gave — though you thanked him always — and you never once assumed he’d take the role of Graham’s dad.

And now… now he finds himself wishing you would.

“Mr. Lee?” Graham creeps up without him even realizing.

Mark jumps, sets his water — and thoughts — aside. “Hey, Bud. It’s really late. What are you doing up?”

Graham sniffs, and Mark realizes that the boy is crying. “I had a nightmare.”

Mark holds out his arms before he can think, and lets the five-year-old crawl into his lap. He wraps them both in his blanket and turns the television up just a little more. “Was it scary?”

“You left.” Graham says, voice less watery, like he doesn’t know the weight of his words. He’s focused on the rerun of Adventure Time that’s playing. He’s not even remotely interested in his nightmare now, with his tears dried up, and his eyes drooping back towards slumber.

“I’m going to leave one day,” Mark says, because he thinks it’s important that Graham knows.

“You should stay with me and Mom,” Graham says. He yawns. “We like you so much!”

Mark’s heart stutters. He tries not to think about it.

-

When Graham’s bed is empty the next morning, you freak out. He’s always in his room in the morning. Even if he wakes up before you, he stays in and plays with his toys.

You’ve already got your phone out, and your mother’s number called, when you walk into the living room.

Relief floods your system. Mark and Graham are asleep on the couch, snuggled up serenely like they didn’t just cause you to have a premature heart attack.

You hang up before the call to your mom can go through and stand there, watching the two boys sleep. Graham has both his arms wrapped around Mark’s forearm. It’s such a sweet picture that you take out your phone and snap one.

The flash is on.

Mark scrunches his nose and winces. “What the–”

“Sorry!” You whisper. “You both looked so cute, I couldn’t help it.”

Mark smiles, still sleepy, and finally opens his eyes. He peers at you, copper brown under fluttering lashes and you’re almost intimidated into looking away. “He had a nightmare.”

“Oh?”

“About me leaving.”

“Oh.” You frown. “I’m really sorry about that. I keep telling him that you’re moving out soon, but I don’t think he fully understands.”

Graham stirs. You reach down and pick him up. Your knuckles brush across Mark’s warm, sweater-clad chest and you suddenly wish you could cuddle with him, too. You shake the thoughts away and focus on your drowsy son. “You’re staying at Grandma's for a few days, remember?”

Graham rubs his eyes and perks up. “And I’ll see her cat?”

“Yes,” you confirm. “But we’ve got to get you dressed because she’s coming in a few minutes.”

-

“Mark Lee!” Your mom’s voice embarrassingly rings through the apartment, and you realize Mark has taken it upon himself to open the door. “Y/n told me she had a temporary roommate but I never thought she would finally ask you!”

“Oh my gosh…” you mumble, buckling Graham’s overalls and hauling him up into your arms. “Mom! His apartment flooded so he’s staying here. Don’t be weird about it.”

“But he’s so handsome,” your mom coos. You’re concerned she might reach forward and pinch Mark’s already ruddy cheeks.

“Thanks,” Mark laughs. “But she’s right, I’m just squatting until I can find a new place.”

Your mom harrumphs. “Well, I don’t see why you can’t stay here forever. Y/n doesn’t even use that office room. And even if she did, the two of you could just share a room.”

“Mom!” You plunk Graham into her hands and grab his overnight bag. “You have to leave.”

“Did I say something wrong?” She sounds worried, but there’s an undisclosed mirth in her eyes that makes you think of your freshman year, when you did have a crush on Mark.

“You said everything wrong,” you say, kindly pushing her out. “Have a good time, Graham. I love you! As always, Mom, call if you need me to come get him.”

“Yeah, right!” She yells over her shoulder. Graham is already giggling, so you close the door with confidence.

You turn back to your roommate. “I’m sorry about that, Mark.”

“It’s fine.” He smiles, but it’s reserved. “But speaking of me finding a place… I know Haechan told you that I can’t go back to my own apartment. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”

“It’s okay,” you say. You want to say “You can stay here as long as you want, and long as you’ll let me keep you,” but that would reveal too much, and you don’t want to lose the one good friend you have.

“And I was thinking I should move out soon anyway.” Mark pulls his sweater sleeves until they cover his hands. He’s hiding. He’s shielding himself the same way he did in junior year, when he got turned down by his crush to go to the prom. “I don’t think it’s good for Graham to get this attached to me if I’m just going to leave.”

“Oh,” Your sleeves are too short, but you want to shield yourself too. “Yeah, that’s… that’s probably a good idea.”

Mark stands there for a beat, like he’s waiting for you to say something more. Like he hasn’t just taken your heart and pushed it aside. Like this hurts a lot less than it actually does.

But any word out of your mouth would be tearful. It would be honest. It would ruin everything. “I’m going to go on a run.”

-

There’s a cricket outside that won’t stop chirping against your window. You blame it for your insomnia, choosing to ignore the anxiety of eventually losing Mark. It feels so horribly childish, since you’ll see him when you drop Graham off at school. And you’ll see him whenever the two of you go out for coffee on weekends.

But you won’t see him in the kitchen, reaching for the pancake mix so his shirt rises up and you can see the dimples in his back. You won’t see him humming along to the radio while he works on his lesson plans. You won’t feel his warmth when the two of you stay awake, nursing spiked lemonade and giggling at the commentary videos you find on YouTube.

He’ll just be Mark again. He won’t be home anymore.

Startled by the realization, you get out of your covers and rush to your door.

It opens before you can even reach for the doorknob, and there’s Mark in his pajamas, biting his lip and avoiding your eyes.

“I don’t want you to leave,” you say.

Mark confesses, “I love you.”

You open your arms and he dives in, face pressed into the space where your neck meets your shoulder. Warmth envelopes you and the scent of pine fills your nose.

Mark is timeless. Youthful glory and childish pride. He’s a pinch on the side and a push on the swings. Like a rock that actually skips on the first try. Like shoes that you can slip on when they’re still tied. And he’s here, in your arms, squeezing you like you’re something valuable enough to lose. He’s confessing love like you aren’t the worst possible candidate for his heart.

“I can’t offer you much,” you start, but Mark bumps his forehead against yours, boyish and playful — football fields and bright red lockers and secret notes on bathroom walls.

“I’ve known you for years, Y/n,” Mark’s voice is a low rumble. Copper eyes blinking at you like you’re something to second glance at. “I know what I’m getting into. I want you. I want Graham. I want everything this is, and everything we’ve been for the past month. I don’t want this to end.”

You close your eyes, because his are too honest. He’s open and vulnerable and gentle — a child on the first day of school, ready to make friends. You take a deep breath, try to remember what you were like on your first day. Rosy cheeks and shy glances. Knobby knees and a trusting heart. You reach out for whoever you once were — the Y/n with a heart open and willing to be loved. “I don’t want this to end either. I’m in love with you, Mark.”

His grin lights up your world in its entirety. Gold flecks in onyx black disappear as he smiles, too thrilled to keep his eyes open. And when he kisses you, warm lips against cold ones, you feel like a puzzle has just slotted into place.

you could feel the beating of your heart all the way in the back of you ear, it’s rhythmic patter at an abnormally fast rate as you nervously stood in front of donghyuck’s apartment door. a place that was very familiar to you once, but felt totally foreign now.

you wondered how it would all unfold, what the first few seconds of your interaction would go like. would he have a moment of realisation that maybe you weren’t worth his time? would you two even talk much? would everything just go back to normal after a month of not seeing each other? you were tempted to back out for a split second, rethinking this moment and reschedule your ‘date’ so you could mentally prepare yourself, even if you were the one who proposed it.

but the door opened, almost as if donghyuck knew you were there this whole time. with a slow pull, you were met with him, and the emotions washed over you like a wave. you could never forget what donghyuck looked like, you’re sure that an image of his face has been permanently scarred in your mind, serving as both a fond or traumatic reminder. the only change was the new jet black hair he wore, its length having grown by a little bit.

“i missed you.” were his first words, a bashful smile already stuck on his face that he couldn’t fight off. it was contagious, as soon enough you smiled back at him, unable to hide your joy. you missed him too, and you told him exactly that. “can i hug you?” donghyuck followed up, this time avoiding any eye contact.

the cuteness aggression you felt for him were put aside for a moment as you leaned forward and embraced the boy next door in a soft embrace, one which tightened as he pulled you closer. you got a whiff of his signature vanilla scent, one you wished to drown in by never letting go off him. but donghyuck already pulled away, retracting his arms back to his side.

“do you like the hair?” he asked with a shy smile sporting his face. you smiled again, nodding your head. you loved it. you loved everything about his look. and after seeing him again, you came to the conclusion that you just loved seeing donghyuck. “it’s a nice look.” you decided on keeping your answer simple, though your answer was enough for donghyuck to beam.

“thank you, it’s a new me. i got the website ready so let’s hurry up.” donghyuck motioned for you to follow him into his apartment. you followed the boy into his place and as you did, donghyuck’s words fully sunk in your head. they lingered as you watched the episodes, and they lingered even after you finished watching them all. looking to your side, you were met with donghyuck who’s head was slumped, having dozed off some time ago.

focusing on the newly dyed black hair, his words came back to mind. a new me. you couldn’t agree more with his simple statement as the hair brought a new identity to the boy you knew. it signified the start of something new, and new him, a new era, a new chance.

staring at his softened features that were in deep rest, you came to the conclusion that you truly were willing to take this new chance, and new him into your life.

part one | oh, i wanna key his car…or light it ablaze?

onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:03 PM heyyy u play lol too 😂

onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:05 PM im a yasuo main 😂

onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:10 PMwhat kinda asian are u

onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:10 PMwhatchu look like

onyourmark 12/1/2024 3:10 PMsorry was that too much 😂😂😂

Your best friend, Rosie, has to put your phone down and take a few deep breaths. “I think I’m going to throw up.”

“Keep going. You haven’t even seen the worst of it,” you respond through a mouthful of strawberry ice cream, completely deadpan. 

onyourmark 12/7/2024 6:21 AM ahh 😂😂

onyourmark 12/7/2024 6:22 PM *kisses you*

onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:39 PM can i tell U something weird :3 😂

onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:40 PM[Audio Message]

onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:39 PMi wrote this rap about my feelings for y baby girl

onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:39 PMbecause uve been such a good gril for me

onyourmark 12/12/2024 5:57 PM holy fck holy dcking fck that body of urs is absurd

Rosie covers her mouth with her hand, closing her eyes in a grimace. “No way he copied Adam Levine unironically.” 

“Keep going.”

onyourmark Yesterday at 1:20 AMwhen can i see u

onyourmark Yesterday at 1:20 AM ill be free after christmas

onyourmark Yesterday at 1:20 AM after annyign fam stuff 😂😂😂

Every message Rosie reads feels like another sucker punch in your gut and your ego, but you just dig your spoon into the tub of ice cream with even more force and let her keep going. Every time you blink, you feel dried up mascara flaking off your eyelashes and getting stuck in the dried tears and snot on your cheeks. 

“‘Annoying fam stuff?’ Is he talking about your anniversary?” Rosie demands.

Yes, your anniversary with your now ex-boyfriend, Mark Lee, is on Christmas. You used to think it was romantic. What a goddamn idiot you were. 

“At least he called me family,” you reply wryly, a hysterical laugh rattling in your chest like a wet cough. 

Rosie shakes her head and hands your phone back to you. “I can’t read any more of this. I’m going to be sick. I thought Discord mods and Discord kittens were just memes. I can’t believe people like him actually exist.” 

You just shrug.

“Where the hell is he now?” She crosses her arms. 

“Probably at his parents’ house. They’re on a ski trip, and they won’t be back until tomorrow,” you sigh, getting a headache thinking about how you were going to explain this to Mark’s parents. 

“Good. Change the locks on your door before he tries to come crawling back. He’s done mooching off you,” Rosie huffs. 

“You were right,” you state matter-of-factly, “That he was just a jobless bum loser who’s a momma’s boy.” 

She looks guilty, leaning over and giving you a hug. “I’m sorry, Y/N.” 

You think about the time you first met Mark, when the two of you were just starry-eyed freshmen in college together. He was so awkward and shy that it took almost an entire semester for him to finally look you in the eye. He followed you around like a sad puppy and would get flustered at any prolonged amount of attention you gave him. After about three years of him being hopelessly in love with you and unable to work up the courage to ask you out, you finally decided to give him a chance in your final year of college. It was a white Christmas, and you remember his trembling hands holding your face, freezing cold fingertips brushing your cheeks, and how red his nose was when he leaned in to kiss you. He looked at you as if you were a goddess that was put on this Earth purely for him to worship. 

Maybe that’s why you moved in together with him when the two of you graduated, even when he was unemployed and you supported him financially. Maybe that’s why you smiled and nodded when he told you he wanted to try being a Twitch streamer. Maybe that’s why you gifted him his first microphone for his setup, or baked him a cake when he finally got his first viewer (even though it was actually a secret account that you made in order to boost his confidence). Maybe that’s why you never complained when he started skipping out on dates (sometimes even your birthday) in favor of growing his audience, or when he bought you extravagant gifts like jewelry or designer clothes without any clue of your preference or size. Maybe that’s why you chose to ignore the churning feeling in the pit of your stomach when you noticed his eyes starting to drift towards anything but you.

Maybe you were always the one who worshipped him. 

It’s almost comical how easily almost a decade of your life has gone down the drain―and all it took was a couple of laughing emojis. In the end, the one who loves more is always the one who loses the most. 

You gave up your best years to Mark Lee, and yet you seemed to have run out of tears to cry for this man. 

Instead, all you have left now is pure, unbridled rage boiling inside of you. It’s the kind of anger that needs to simmer first―the kind that manifests first as a calm indifference before it finally bubbles over into a complete meltdown. But you’ll be damned before you set fire to your mental health and personal belongings that you worked tooth and nail for over a man who ruined your life. 

So, you’ve decided to set fire to something else. 

“Rosie,” you say softly, your voice chillingly serene. “I’m going to set his car on fire.” 

Rosie laughs. “Want me to be your getaway driver?” 

“No, I wouldn’t want to implicate you,” you respond smoothly. “Besides, I want him to know that I’m the one who did it.” 

She looks at you for a moment, trying to decide if you’re joking or not. “Are you sure you’re okay?” 

“Yes. I don’t have the energy to care about him anymore,” you answer―only a half lie. “You should go now. I know you have a late shift tonight.” 

Rosie gives you another tight squeeze. “Call me if you need anything, okay? I’m off this weekend, so we should go get drunk off our asses.” 

After she leaves, you slowly get up and make your way to the bathroom. You wash your face in the sink, scrubbing on the gunk off, and apply a fresh layer of makeup. If you’re going to do this, you’re going to make sure you look hot as hell (pun intended). Once you’re done, you make your way to the nearest gas station and purchase a gallon of gasoline before promptly driving to Mark’s parent’s house. 

By the time you get there, it’s already close to midnight, and not even the darkness can shroud Mark’s new Tesla Cybertruck. You remember when he bought it because you had to pay for half of his rent for the month because he was saving up for it―the smug grin on his face, as he announced it to his Twitch chat. You’re embarrassed at how happy you were for him, and you didn’t even have the heart to tell him how hideous you found it. The truck’s mirrored exterior reflects the moon in the starless night sky, and the full moon almost looks like a shiny, pretty bullseye calling out for you to destroy it. 

Without hesitation, you get out of your car and immediately start dumping gasoline all over and around the car. The scent of gasoline normally makes you nauseous, but the scent of revenge smells even sweeter. Before you take out your lighter, you pick up a large piece of broken concrete from his driveway. With all of the strength you can muster, you hurl the concrete into the driver side window of the truck and watch your reflection shatter along with the glass. 

The car alarm starts blaring, and you wait for the light in Mark’s room to blink on. You see his silhouette as he opens his blinds and peers out, just to lock eyes with you. He gawks at you like he’s just seen a ghost, and it doesn’t take long for him to make his way down to you. As he stumbles down the driveway, you take out your lighter and flick it on, letting it slowly slip from your fingertips. Your heart swells with a hysterical sense of glee as his eyes widen, the orange flames reflecting in his teary eyes. His Cybertruck is set ablaze with a Hollywood-esque level of perfection, and the fire gives your face a golden glow as if you were the starring actress. 

“Y/N! Are you fucking crazy?” Mark hollers over the crackle of the flames, voice breaking. 

“Oh, you bet I fucking am,” you laugh. 

“I’m gonna sue you―you bitch! Have you thrown in jail!” he screams, fishing his phone out of his pocket and punching in 911 on the keypad. “I’m calling the cops right now!” 

“Do it, you spineless piece of shit! I’m going to make sure everyone in this damn neighborhood and on the internet knows what a lying, cheating, soul-sucking little leech you are!” you yell back at him. “I’m going to ruin your fucking career first and then happily walk my ass down to the police station.”

That makes Mark stop in his tracks, his thumb hovering over the dial button. He can’t control the fear on his face. “No one is gonna believe you.” 

“Aw, you sure no one will believe me when I show everyone the screenshots of your DMs with uwukittenbb69?” you taunt. 

“I’ll say they’re fake!” he nearly screeches. 

“Let’s fucking go then! My word against yours. We’ll see who they believe,” you challenge. 

Mark falters and takes a small step forward. “W-Wait…” 

Unfortunately for him, he’s interrupted by the squealing sirens of a firetruck pulling up to the street. You and Mark exchange glances, and you silently dare him to report you, before both of you turn towards the firefighters exiting the truck. 

“Mark…and Y/N?” 

Your eyes widen at the sound of the approaching firefighter’s voice. You watch in horror as the firefighter removes his helmet, and you get a clearer look at his face. Tufts of wavy caramel-colored hair sticking out, a youthful and angelic face that doesn’t suit his occupation, and heart-shaped lips turned downwards in concern―it’s Mark’s cousin, Donghyuck. You’ve met him a decent amount of times at family gatherings, and he sometimes drops by you and Mark’s apartment to deliver homemade food from his mom. Donghyuck has always been kind to you, and you didn’t want him to see you like this.

Donghyuck’s confusion is short-lived before his attention falls back to the fire and how close you are to it. He quickly grabs your arm and pulls you away from the burning truck. 

“Be careful. Are you hurt?” he asks carefully, eyes scanning your face with precision. “And why aren’t you wearing a jacket? It’s freezing out here.” 

You open your mouth to try and fumble out an answer, but you flinch at the sound of Donghyuck’s colleagues blasting Mark’s car with water from the firetruck’s power hose. All that’s left of the Cybertruck is a deformed and blackened pile of scrap metal with a plume of smoke rising from it. You can’t help the sense of satisfaction you feel. 

“Don’t breathe in the smoke. It’s not good for you,” Donghyuck urges, gently sticking an arm in front of you and gesturing for you to step back even further. “Come with me. There’s blankets in the back of the truck.”

“I’m fine,” you finally manage to say, shaking your head. “I’m not cold.” 

It’s true; the fire you set has been more than enough to make your insides feel all warm and fuzzy. He doesn’t look like he believes you but doesn’t try to push any further. 

“Okay, so what the hell happened here? We got a call from the neighbors saying there was a blazing ball on fire in Mark’s driveway and that the two of you were in a screaming match.” 

“Ask Mark,” is all you say. 

Donghyuck raises an eyebrow. 

“It was an accident.”

As if on cue, Mark suddenly materializes next to you and Donghyuck―a restless expression on his face. He probably thought you were telling Donghyuck what he did to you and rushed over. 

“What?” Donghyuck’s eyes nearly pop out of his head. “You’re saying that was an accident?”

“Yeah. I was just…messing around. Don’t worry about it. It was an accident,” Mark says through gritted teeth, sounding completely defeated. 

The corners of your mouth twitch when you chime in, “A senseless accident.” 

Donghyuck is completely speechless as he glances between the two of you. However, you look past him and watch the fireworks exploding in the dark sky. Pulling out your phone, you see that it’s midnight, meaning it’s officially the 25th of December. Glancing over at Mark, you see him trembling in the cold with a sniffly red nose and bloodshot eyes. He’s staring straight at the ground, fists clenched. 

You smile. 

part two | part two | wanna push him in the fireplace and watch him burn!

When you finally get home that night, you draw yourself a steaming hot bubble bath and even use the fancy bath bomb that Rosie bought you. After you get dressed, you make a charcuterie board and pour yourself a glass of wine as well before falling asleep to a Hallmark movie playing on your television. It’s probably the best sleep you’ve gotten over the past month. 

You wake up in the morning feeling refreshed, a certain five-foot-nine burden lifted from your shoulders, and text all of your friends and family your holiday greetings. Rosie invited you out to her family gathering because she didn’t want you to be alone on Christmas, but you declined. You decided to stay home and get some cleaning done. Of course, by cleaning, you mean boxing up all of Mark’s stuff and donating it to Goodwill. You initially wanted to burn everything, but you’ve committed enough arson already. 

Just as you’re getting ready to make a hearty breakfast in preparation for the mass Mark exodus, you hear the door to your apartment being opened, and your blood runs cold when you realize you haven’t changed the lock. Then your cold blood begins to boil at the audacity that Mark still must have in his pathetic little body to even dream of stepping foot in your home. 

Gripping your frying pan tightly, you march out of the kitchen to greet him. Mark at least has the sense to shrivel back when he sees you approach him. To your delight, he looks absolutely terrible. It’s obvious he didn’t get any sleep nor did he feel the need to change out of his pajamas. 

“I know you’re mad,” he says quickly, holding his hands out as if ready to block a punch.

“If you actually knew that, you wouldn’t have stepped foot in my apartment,” you say nonchalantly. “You have ten seconds to give my key back to me and get the hell out before you have to call the cops again.”

“Chill, chill,” he mutters, “I’m just here for my stuff―”

“Don’t tell me to chill. I’ve always hated it when you tell me that. It makes you sound like a patronizing douchebag, which you are, of course,” you snap. “You’re insane if you think I’m going to let you just waltz in here and casually get your stuff. Most of which I paid for, by the way.”

“Y/N, come on,” he sighs. “at least let me get my PC setup.”

That makes you burst out laughing. “Holy shit. You really have the gall to ask me for your PC setup? Are you on actual crack? Get the fuck out!”

“Okay, okay, okay. I’m sorry, okay? Just one more thing―”

“Don’t make me swear to Jesus on his birthday―” 

“My mom wants you to come to the Christmas party this afternoon,” he blurts out, squeezing his eyes shut. “I…haven’t told her yet. I wanted us to tell her, um, together, after the party.”

He doesn’t need to say it for you to understand what he’s implying. He wants to make it seem like the breakup was mutual to save his reputation and because he knows his mom will lose her mind. He’s pretended to be her perfect little boy his entire life, a momma’s boy to the very core, so he can’t ever let her know what a bottomfeeder he is. 

“Is this some sort of social experiment to see how far you can push my limits before I finally snap? Again?” you ask incredulously. 

“Please, Y/N. I’ll do anything. I won’t ask for my stuff anymore. I won’t tell anyone about the car thing. I promise you that you won’t ever see me again if you do me this favor,” Mark sputters.

You hate that you still hesitate, despite how much you’re disgusted by him. It makes you feel like you haven’t completely axed the part of you that was in love with him, and that sickens you. However, Mrs. Lee has always been like a second mother to you, and it doesn’t feel right to just cut her off without a proper goodbye just because her son is a cretin. You suppose this could be good closure for such an ill-fated relationship. 

“You swear on your life that you’ll leave me alone forever after this?” you ask, crossing your arms.

Mark nods profusely.

“Fine. I’m only staying for an hour, and I don’t care if the party isn’t over yet. We’re going to tell her within that period or else,” you state. 

“Thank you. Thank you so much, Y/N.” Mark opens his arms to hug you, and it takes every fiber in your being not to whack him across the head with your frying pan. 

“Do not touch me,” you warn, “Now get out.” 

To his credit, he promptly hightails it out of your apartment (perhaps he finally noticed the murderous glint in your eye). You almost immediately regret agreeing, but you tell yourself that today is the last day that you’ll ever have to deal with the likes of Mark Lee again. Putting a hold on cleaning, you get ready for the party instead, donning a cute holiday fit that you had prepared especially for today since it was supposed to be your anniversary. Now, it makes for a great revenge dress. 

Mark had texted you to let you know to bring a gift since there would be a white elephant gift exchange, and half of you wants to call him and scream at him for not letting you know sooner and the other half is screaming at yourself for forgetting to block him. Not having enough time to go out and buy a gift, you decide to wrap up the scarf that you knitted for Mark. You stayed up all night after you got off work to make it for him, and it looks a bit wonky, but you thought he would appreciate it. You feel bad for whoever receives it, but there has to be a few duds in the mix or it’s not a true white elephant experience. Maybe they can use the scarf to wipe up their dog’s piss or something.

When you drive back to Mark’s parents’ house, it’s an ironic clash of atmospheres. The place is decked out with Christmas decorations, an amalgamation of rainbow lights, inflatable snowmen, and wreaths on every door and window. Yet, you can also see remnants of the dark burn marks in their driveway. Mark must have managed to call a tow to take his Cybertruck away just in the nick of time. You do wonder how he managed to explain the burn marks, though. 

Taking in a deep breath, you hype yourself up in your car visor mirror before stepping out and walking to the front door. Before you can even knock, Mrs. Lee opens the door and envelops you in a bear hug. She smells like sugar cookies, and it occurs to you how much you’ll miss her. 

“Oh, sweetie! I’m so glad you’re here,” she coos, cupping your face. She then ushers you into the living room, linking her arm through yours. “I was so worried because I thought the two of you got into a fight while we were on our trip.”

You just smile uncomfortably. “O-Oh.” 

“A mother’s intuition is always right, you know,” she says, winking, “Plus, I knew something was off when Mark told us he’d be staying at our place for a couple nights. Poor boy was a mess, you know. He somehow managed to total his car in the driveway! Can you believe it? He really needs you around to whip him into shape!” 

You hope she can’t see you holding in a laugh. As you’re walking, you scan the room for Mark, but he’s nowhere to be seen. It doesn’t surprise you one bit that you’re being treated as fodder so he can hide in his room. 

“Anyways, say hi to everyone!” She leads you directly into a circle of Mark’s aunt and uncles. You give them all an awkward hello and try to slink away while they all converse, but one of Mark’s aunts turns towards you. 

“So, how long have you and Mark been together, honey?” she asks. 

“Um, about four years―”

“Oh, but they’ve known each other for much longer than that. Seven years! Mark had the biggest crush on her, you know,” Mrs. Lee interjects. 

“My goodness, does that mean we’ll be hearing wedding bells soon?” Mark’s aunt teases. The rest of the circle oohs and ahhs, and you want to strangle yourself with a garland. 

“I mean, what is he waiting for anyway? He’s making loads of money on the Internet now, isn’t he?” she continues. 

“Exactly. I want grandchildren, you know,” Mrs. Lee huffs. 

Unable to bite back your words anymore, you clear your throat loudly. “I have something I need to―” 

“Oh, Y/N! I’ve been looking for you,” another voice chimes in. 

All of you turn around, and a gasp nearly escapes you when you see Donghyuck standing in front of you. He’s in a white cable knit sweater, and his wavy hair looks so fluffy that you almost want to reach out and touch it. His cheeks are a bit flushed, probably because he’s in such thick clothing (or Mrs. Lee’s famous spiked eggnog). Without his uniform on, he looks much softer, dreamier. 

“You…have?” you ask, bewildered. 

“Yup! Come on, I gotta ask you something,” he answers cheerfully, gesturing for you to follow him. 

You’re a bit wary of what he’s scheming, but you’d rather risk it than have to deal with any more marriage talk, so you gladly let him whisk you away from the crowd. Donghyuck leads you to a less crowded part of the room, swiping a piece of chocolate cake when he walks past the dessert table, and tucks himself into a corner that’s concealed by a giant Christmas tree. 

“Here we go. I introduce to you my super covert corner that I stand in when I want to avoid nosy relatives,” he says in a sing-song voice before offering you the cake in his hand. “Would you like some German chocolate cake made by yours truly? It’s pretty damn average, if I do say so myself.” 

You pause, only just now realizing that Donghyuck helped you out. You suppose you have nothing to lose, so you accept the cake. “Oh. Thank you. So, you didn’t have anything you wanted to ask me?” 

“Well, actually, I do,” he hums, giving you a sheepish grin. “You set Mark’s car on fire last night, didn’t you?”

Part of you already expected this question coming, so you manage to keep your expression neutral. “Are you accusing me?” 

“Why, I wouldn’t dare. Besides, I don’t need to. I know you did,” he says casually, shrugging.

Even though you should feel panicked, you don’t. In fact, Donghyuck almost seems to find it amusing. 

“Do you have proof?”

“Mark told me,” he states sweetly.

You sigh loudly, immediately giving up the ruse. “I knew that damn lowlife would yap.” 

“So, what did he do?” 

“Of course, he told you what I did but didn’t tell you what he did,” you snort. 

“What, he cheat or something?” 

“Worse.” 

You pull out your phone and show Donghyuck Mark’s Discord DMs and watch his expression morph into disgust as you indulge in the cake he gave you. The dessert is perfectly average as he said, but there’s something charming about it. In that way, the cake is quite similar to its maker. 

“As a government employee and resident fighter of fires, nothing justifies arson,” he states after a brief moment to collect his thoughts, “but this comes pretty damn close.” 

You give him a smug I-told-you-so look.

“But seriously, what you did was really dangerous, Y/N. You could have injured yourself badly. That jackass is not worth getting third-degree burns over. There are better ways to get revenge, you know,” he lectures.

“Like what?” You raise an eyebrow.

“I don’t know, like TP or egg his car or something. Slash his tires?” 

“God, are you from a 90s movie or something? That’s lame as hell,” you snort, taking another bite of cake.

“Dig your key into the side of his pretty little souped up four-wheel drive? Carve your name into his leather seats? Take a Louisville slugger to both headlights? Slash a hole in all four tires?” He wriggles his eyebrows. 

“Are you quoting Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood?” you ask incredulously.

“Maybe next time he’ll think before he cheats…” Donghyuck sings, purposefully off-key. 

You can’t fight that smile that spreads across your face, and it eventually turns into a full-on belly laugh when he continues to sing. It’s the first genuine laugh, the first moment of brief happiness and relief, that you’ve felt in a long time. You thought you had it when you set Mark’s car on fire, but something still coiled in the pit of your stomach like simmering, black smoke. In this tiny little corner that smells of pine needles and chocolate cake, you feel free like a clear sky after a long winter storm.

“For the record,” Donghyuck says, voice gently dipping, “you’ve always been too good for him, and everyone knows it―including him. He’ll regret what he did to you for the rest of his life. That’s your revenge.” 

Your breath staccatos in your chest at his words. You tell yourself that he has always been a smooth talker, but he looks at you with such honesty and warmth that you want to believe him. 

“Have you always been this sweet?” You meant for the words to come out in a teasing manner, but your voice is tinged with breathlessness. 

Donghyuck grins, and his lips remind you of the heart-shaped lollipops that you see in the store during Valentine’s Day. “The sweetest.” 

A part of you wonders what would happen if you craned your neck and kissed him right here and now. Not because you’re romantically interested in him, of course. Rather, it would be a spectacular way to get revenge on Mark. Most girls go for the brother or the best friend―maybe even the dad if one is particularly ambitious―but the cousin is an untapped (pun NOT intended) medium for revenge. 

You wonder if Donghyuck tastes like cookies or wine-filled chocolates or spiked eggnog or even fruitcake. You really hate fruitcake, but you suppose you wouldn’t mind for the sake of revenge. 

But you would never do that to him. He’s much too kind of a person to be involved in you and Mark’s mess. The fact that you’re able to confide in him and he actually takes your side is something that you truly appreciate. As much as you want to torment Mark, it’s best to just end it here. 

“You can use me too, you know,” Donghyuck adds.

“Huh?” You blink.

“For your revenge,” he clarifies. “Use me. To make him jealous, to bully him, whatever you want.” 

For a moment, you almost believe he somehow read your mind. 

“Just wanted to let you know,” he says, shrugging, “since you probably think it would be too mean. Plus, I think you would need my help anyways.”

That makes you feel greatly offended. “What is that supposed to mean? You say that like I didn’t set a car on fire.” 

“You’re too naive in your thinking. Revenge doesn’t always have to be loud and in your face like that. It’s a lot more fun when you break them down psychologically in more subtle ways,” he explains.

“So, you―as a government employee―can’t approve of me committing arson because I got cheated on, but you―as a government employee―can casually and openly discuss waging psychological warfare on another civilian. On said person who cheated on me, who also happens to be your cousin because you seemed to have forgotten that, ” you point out sardonically. 

Donghyuck just smiles before slightly leaning in, eyes flickering down to your lips. You open your mouth to retort but your words instantly die in your throat, softly gasping when his hand brushes your chin as he reaches over and swipes a bit of chocolate frosting from your bottom lip with his thumb. 

“Sure I can,” he answers smoothly, “because, unlike a certain someone, I won’t get caught.” 

“I didn’t―”

“And by the way, Mark didn’t tell me you set his car on fire.” 

You gawk at him as he walks past you with a content grin on his face. “Now come on, I hear my aunt calling for us.” 

Maybe you need to take back your earlier statement of Donghyuck being too kind. He might actually have more screws loose than you.

.

.

.

You almost completely forget about Mark until he finally comes downstairs for the white elephant exchange. You’re in such a daze from your earlier interaction with Donghyuck that you barely recoil when Mark takes a seat beside you on the couch, especially since Donghyuck is sitting in the rocking chair directly across from you. 

The gift exchange begins once everyone has drawn a number, and you honestly just dissociate for the first half of it. Keeping your gaze trained on the piece of paper that has 26 scribbled on it, you don’t look up until you feel Mark get up beside you and pick a gift from the pile. You’re praying to both Jesus and Santa that he doesn’t pick yours, but you suppose you've been deemed a sinner and also put on the Naughty List (maybe for setting your cheating ex’s care on fire?) because Mark somehow manages to find yours in the pile of presents. 

When he opens it, you can tell by the way he quickly glances at you that he knows it’s yours. After all, he saw you practicing your knitting throughout the week. He happily wraps it around his neck and beams proudly. “I love it.”

The way he carefully looks back at you makes you want to smack him into the new year. You know he’s trying to get on your good side, and you make it clear with your scowl that it isn’t working. 

You’re actually grateful that it’s your turn next so that you’re able to get up and walk away from him. Wanting to get this entire situation over with, you haphazardly grab one from the top of the pile. Your heart sinks when you take out the stuffing paper from the bag and realize that it’s Mark’s gift. You contemplate putting the paper back in and not opening it at all, but you cave under the pressure of all the expectant pairs of eyes on you. 

In typical Mark fashion, his gift is a signed T-shirt of his own merch. It’s an obnoxious yellow color with his Twitch username and a giant screen printed image of his face plastered across it. He’s written his signature right over his forehead, so it makes him look like he has random chicken scratch on his face. 

“Oh, it must be destiny!” Mrs. Lee exclaims, clapping her hands together. 

You force a smile before returning to your seat, doing everything in your power to ignore Mark’s stupid giddy expression. Shoving the shirt back into the bag, you casually kick it away from you. 

A couple more people take their turns, and you’re counting down the seconds to when this is finally over so you can go home. Eventually, it’s Donghyuck’s turn, and he saunters towards you and holds his hand out. 

“Gimme.”

You blink at him.

“Your gift. I’m stealing it,” he explains, wiggling his fingers. 

“You want…this?” you ask, completely baffled. 

“Well, duh. It’s going to sell for a lot of money, you know.” He winks. 

You can’t help but laugh when you realize he’s helping you out again. “This has to be unethical. Aren’t you a government employee?” 

“Government employees need to make money too,” he replies, sighing. 

“Well, if you really want it, I guess I have no choice,” you huff, faking exasperation before handing him the bag. 

You’re smiling when he takes it and walks back to his chair, and you hear Mark grumble something under his breath. Turning to him, you raise an eyebrow, snippily asking, “What?”

“I said,” he repeats so loudly that it reverberates throughout the room, “when did the two of you get so friendly?” 

A silence falls over everyone, and the two of you are now center stage. 

“Are you really going to do this now?” you hiss. 

“I noticed that the two of you were getting awfully cozy behind the Christmas tree earlier,” Mark retorts, shrugging. 

Donghyuck gets up to intervene, but he doesn’t have time to even react before you grab a pillow from the couch and chuck it in Mark’s face. 

“You’ve got some nerve. Was this your plan all along? To make me look like the bad guy in front of your family?” you demand, feeling your face grow hotter and hotter from rage. “You and uwukittenbb69 were getting awfully cozy too, don’t you think? I’d say snug as a bug in a goddamn rug even.” 

Mark stands up in a flash, his eyes frantically glancing at his mom before pointing his finger at you. “Baby, I told you she was just a friend.” 

You nearly choke on air when you hear him call you that. Making a beeline towards the pile of presents, you begin to toss them at Mark with each question you add. “You absolute lunatic. Do friends beg each other for pictures of their tits? Do friends write raps confessing their love for one another? Do friends blow off their anniversary with their girlfriend so that they can meet up for a quick booty call? And yes, I’m saying quick because you and I both know it’ll be a speedy endeavor.”

“What on Earth is going on?” Mrs. Lee cries out as Mark tries his best to swat away the presents being hurled at him. 

“You’re a psycho bitch,” Mark yells. “It’s not like I actually slept with her. We were just messing around online. You got jealous over nothing. And you set my car on fire!” 

“You wanna see psycho?” you snap, throwing the present in your hands down onto the floor and marching towards him with your bare fists before you suddenly stop and take in your surroundings. You see the horror and shock on everyone’s faces, the way they’re looking at you, and then perhaps most clear of all―Mark’s expression. He’s angry just like you, but there’s a glimmer of victory in his eyes. As if he’s bested you in some manner. 

And he has. You’re the villain now.

Taking in a deep breath, you will yourself to walk over to Mark in a calm manner, looking him directly in the eye. 

“You’re nothing except a liar and a cheater, Mark Lee. That will never change that no matter how much you try to spin it in front of your family. You built your success off my back, and I hope that haunts you for the rest of your life. May you receive everything that you’ve done to me tenfold. That’s all I want to say—” You pause. “Oh, and I’ve always thought your Cybertruck was fucking ugly.” 

You reach over and snatch the scarf from his neck before turning and walking out of the door, feeling like you finally managed to cut off the ball and chain around your ankle. Just as you’re about to reach your car, you hear someone calling after you. 

“I’ll drive you home,” Donghyuck says once he catches up to you. 

“I’m not so distraught that I’ll become a hazard on the road,” you say wryly

“Well, when it comes to being around a car, you’ve certainly proved that you’re not exactly at your most dangerous when you’re behind the wheel,” he jokes. 

“You may have a point,” you acknowledge, giving him a small smile.

“Let me drive you home, Y/N. I’m worried about you,” he insists again, much quieter this time. 

“How are you going to get back then?” You raise an eyebrow. 

“I’ll call an Uber or something.” 

“That would be such a waste of money,” you snort.

“Not if it’s for you,” he says almost instantly. His normally brown eyes almost look auburn when under the golden glow of the sunset. 

There’s such determination, such assurance, such warmth in his gaze that you let yourself be surrounded with, no longer having the energy to resist him, and it feels like falling onto a soft cloud after a long, winding journey. For once, you just want someone to take care of you, even if it’s just for a moment. 

“Fine. Do as you please,” you relent, tossing him your car keys before walking around to the passenger side and climbing in. 

Donghyuck looks relieved, beaming when he situates himself in the driver’s seat. You try not to be impressed with the way he easily backs out of the driveway with one hand on the steering wheel and the other on the headrest behind you, maneuvering the wheel with a deftness you’ve never seen before. Then again, he does drive a massive fire truck on the daily, so your Toyota probably isn’t much of a challenge for him. 

He drives with his eyes staring straight down the road―almost too focused―because you know he’s trying not to look at you. Probably because you’re making it abundantly clear that you don’t want him to look at you, leaning your head against the window and away from him. It doesn’t mean that you don’t see his wandering eyes, almost as if it were second nature, drift back to you in the reflection of the window.

“Pathetic, right?” you finally say, feeling suffocated by the heavy silence.

“What’s pathetic?” 

“Me.” 

“Why would you be pathetic?” Donghyuck grips the steering wheel tightly, knuckles turning white as the leather creaks under the force of his hold.

“Mark was right. I talked a big game in front of him, but in the end, I was just the psycho ex-girlfriend. I told myself that I would never let him hold my emotions hostage anymore. That I would erase any care I had for him left in me. Because indifference means that I’m truly free. But I couldn’t do it. I really hate him, to my very core, and that means he still has power over me. I hate that most of all. I want him to feel the same pain I did, and I want to exact revenge on him, but at the same time, I want to move on with my life. I’m like a dog chasing my own tail; it’s pathetic.” 

You wanted to sound more lighthearted about this, turn it into a joke, but Donghyuck seems to draw out a vulnerability within you that makes you want to tell him everything you’ve been trying to desperately ignore. 

“Y/N, you’re dealing with the end of a long-term relationship. It’s only natural that you have confusing and conflicting feelings about everything. You’re not pathetic; you’re human. Mark stole your girlhood and your youth, and it’s going to take time for you to heal from that. It’s impossible to immediately get back on your feet after what he did to you. None of this is your fault, so don’t ever berate yourself,” Donghyuck’s voice trembles as he speaks. “I promise you that one day, you’re going to wake up and you’ll realize that you don’t remember what Mark's favorite food is. His favorite movie. His favorite color. Then you’ll realize that you can barely even remember what his face looks like when he’s sad, happy, angry. Eventually, you’ll forget about him entirely, and all the pain he caused you will just be seconds of your life that evaporates from your mind completely.”

When he speaks to you like there’s nothing he’s more sure of in this world, it makes you want to believe him. You want to be his promise. 

“Thank you, Donghyuck,” you whisper, placing your hand on top of his for just a moment before pulling away. Your touch is feather light, but you hope he didn’t notice the way your fingertips lingered a second longer. 

The two of you fall quiet again, but this time, the silence is much more comfortable now. You’re almost disappointed when he pulls into your apartment complex, unsure of how to say goodbye to him. 

“Would you like some hot cocoa or something?” you blurt out when he parks. “I think I have some in my apartment.”

You don’t realize how suggestive your offer sounds until it’s too late. Donghyuck hesitates for a moment, and you can tell he’s debating on if he should tease you about it or not. To your surprise, he doesn’t.

“Nah, it’s okay. It’s getting dark soon, so I should head back.” He pulls out his phone and starts ordering an Uber. 

“Want me to wait with you then?” You’re not sure why you keep insisting on staying with him, but this day has been so batshit insane that you almost feel like a passenger in your own body. 

“Probably not a good idea,” he chuckles.

Now, you feel both confused and slightly offended again.

“And why is that? I know I’ve been a bit of a menace today, but still…” you trail off awkwardly. 

Donghyuck pauses for a moment as he stares at you; his face is closer to yours than it’s ever been because you’re sitting right next to him. You can tell he’s thinking very carefully about his next words. It occurs to you that, for a guy as seemingly flippant as him, he is actually quite thoughtful.

“You know, I’ve been compared to Mark my entire life,” he begins, musing. 

“Sooo…you didn’t want me to wait with you because you’re gearing up for a trauma dump?” You raise an eyebrow. 

Donghyuck holds his hand up in front of you, shushing you. “Shh, let me have my big moment.” 

“Sorry. Please proceed.” 

“Ahem. As I was saying, I was but a poor, innocent wee boy living in the shadow of the golden child in our family. Mark was always the more athletic, the funnier, the more charming one. His grades were ass, but he always managed to get out of trouble because he was the favorite. When I got my job as a firefighter and he was unemployed, my family barely congratulated me or even acknowledged it at all because they were afraid they would upset Mark. You see, I’ve actually lived quite a tragic life,” Donghyuck sniffles, wiping away a fake tear. 

“What a shame that they can’t see how wonderful you are,” you chime in, a smile in your voice. 

Your honesty in response to his joke visibly catches him off guard, and he blinks a couple of times before your words finally register. 

“Right?” he huffs dramatically, but he can’t seem to meet your eyes completely as a light flush dustes his face and ears. “But fret not, I didn’t particularly mind. It was nice not having to live up to any expectations. Besides, I was happy for Mark when he finally got successful as a streamer. We were raised like brothers, and I always admired him. I was proud of him.” 

“Ha, little did you know—”

“All this to say that, growing up, I’ve never been once jealous of Mark,” Donghyuck states proudly. 

Then he slowly looks over at you with longing eyes, almost as if his body turning itself towards you is a natural reflex. His expression is so soft and affectionate that it nearly takes your breath away. 

“That is, until he met you.” 

So, this is what Donghyuck looks like when he’s in love. You wonder if it would ever be possible for you to wake up one day and not remember it. 

But you aren’t sure if you return his feelings in the same way. Just like you couldn’t bring yourself to use him for your revenge, you can’t bring yourself to ask him to wait for you while you figure out the mess of your current emotional state. The one who loves more always loses, and you don’t want to lose Donghyuck. 

“I just wanted to tell you that,” he continues, “I’m not expecting a response. It’s for the better you don’t respond right now anyways. If you want to pretend like this conversation was all a bad dream conjured up by sleep paralysis and never want to talk about it again, I’m okay with that too.” 

You smile. 

“But…if you’re able to, just look my way sometimes. I’ll do everything in my power to keep your attention, even if I have to get on a unicycle with a clown nose and juggle. And, if one day, you find yourself looking for me on your own, let me know. Then, I’ll ask for an answer,” Donghyuck promises.  

True to your word, you don’t give him an answer. Instead, you take the scarf that’s been laying across your lap—the scarf with a few holes thanks to missing yarn and sections where you accidentally knitted the pattern in the wrong direction. Now it’s a bit stretched out due to you snatching it off Mark. 

But this scarf, as average (maybe even less) as it may be, is charming in its own way. 

Leaning forward, you wrap the scarf around Donghyuck’s neck. He watches you in complete awe, in a trance, as if he were in a dream and any movement would wake him up. 

“I should head inside now,” you say quietly, trying not to giggle at his stupefied expression.

He only nods dazedly, and you’re certain that would have been his reaction regardless of what you said. It takes a few more beats for your words to actually click before he clears his throat loudly. “Right. Yes. You should.” 

He hands you your keys back before stepping out of the car and opening your door for you. “I’ll wait down here until you get inside, and then I’ll go meet my Uber.” 

“Thanks for driving me,” you say, realizing you never thanked him. 

“You’re welcome. Good night, Y/N.” Donghyuck puts his hands in his pockets and tucks his chin into the scarf as he watches you go.

As your hand hovers over the doorknob, you know you should just open the door and walk inside so you don’t keep him waiting in the cold. You really shouldn’t look back because it would mean that you wanted to. Not because he asked you to. 

But you do. You look back—

only to meet his eyes, the two of you exchanging knowing smiles.

extra | is it me? am i the drama? i don’t think i’m the drama…

r/AmITheAsshole

u/justgirlythings-arson119 • 9h

(UPDATE) AITA for setting my cheating ex’s car on fire? (and then falling for his cousin)

So, it turns out my cheating ex got catfished. His supposed Discord kitten was actually some random guy and his friend who were dicking around. They ended up leaking the DMs so they’re all public now for those who would like to read them (by now, I’m sure you all know who my cheating ex is). I would highly advise against listening to the rap confession though. Godspeed if you choose to. I am also selling his expensive PC setup on Facebook Marketplace if anyone’s interested. Happy New Year!

P.S. I ended up inviting the cousin over for hot cocoa. He’s very sweet. 

⥣ 11.3k ⥥ 2,293 Comments

pissrevolver1122 • 8h rip bozo got catfished by me n bro for some robux 

➥ Reply ⥣ 3.8k ⥥

pooprevolver0205 • 8h can’t believe bro actually jacked off to a pic of knees LMAO ➥ ⥣ 1.9k ⥥

piss-k1nk0219 • 2h yall are about to have the awkwardest family get togethers ever lmao

➥ Reply ⥣ 910 ⥥

bigsnowballs0813 • 4h $5 and an iced coffee for the pc take it or leave it

➥ Reply ⥣ 748 ⥥

femboyluvr0701 • 1h are u gonna set the cousin's car on fire too

➥ Reply ⥣ 639 ⥥

By the time you and Yeri finish hanging up all the posters, the sun is already starting to set, and all you want to do is go home and put a heating pad on your back. After saying bye to Yeri, you start making your way back to the bakery to lock up. Once you arrive, you notice a figure dressed in black slumped over in front of the door. You can see their shoulders rise up and down as they take in labored breaths, leaning against the glass door for support. 

Every rational fiber in your being screams at you to not approach the stranger alone, but it’s not like you can just leave this person at the front of your place of business. Cautiously taking a step forward, you squat down to eye level with the stranger, wincing slightly from back pain. Through the sweaty and matted mess of his brown fringe, you can see that the stranger is a young man around your age. However, his face is absolutely battered: bloody (and almost certainly broken) nose, split lip, black eye swollen shut, and a jagged cut on his cheek. If he notices your presence, he doesn’t show it, keeping his head hung down.

Gingerly placing a hand on his arm, you give him a small shake. “Excuse me? Are you okay? Do you need me to call an ambulance?” 

His brows furrow, and he opens an eye (the only one he’s probably able to open) with a wince before lifting a finger and putting it against his lips. You notice that his knuckles are completely scraped raw. 

“Not so loud. I’m okay,” he answers. 

“You don’t look―” 

As if on cue, his stomach rumbles with a guttural growl that slowly drawls into a sputtering gurgle before dying out all together―leaving a long silence to hang between the two of you.

After another beat, he gives you a sheepish smile. “You got anything to eat?” 

You stare at him for a moment; his face is flushed, pink all the way down to his neck. 

And like a stupid horror movie character who opens the door to a room that clearly screams danger, you nod. 

.

.

.

Fortunately, he―Donghyuck, as he introduced himself―ends up not being a crazy ax murderer. 

Unfortunately, you find yourself awkwardly sitting in your closed bakery with a virtual stranger, fiddling with a first aid kit while watching him absolutely devour a piece of leftover tiramisu that you had in your fridge. If the situation wasn’t so insane, you might actually think it was pretty funny. For someone who looks the way he does, this current picture of Donghyuck absolutely doesn’t suit him―bruised chipmunk cheeks stuffed with ladyfingers and cocoa powder stuck on his split lip. 

When he’s finished, Donghyuck looks over at you with a mesmerized expression on his face, as if you just fed him ambrosia. There’s a softness to his face that you didn’t think could exist underneath all that grime and dried blood. 

“That was…delicious,” he breathes. 

“Thanks,” you snort, pushing a glass of water towards him. Unsurprisingly, he chugs it in the blink of an eye. “I still think you should get those injuries checked out, though.” 

“Nah, I’ll rub a little spit in them and it’ll be fine,” he shrugs. 

“Don’t be gross,” you sigh, scooting your chair closer to him as you set the first aid kit on the table. “Now, come here.” 

Donghyuck reluctantly dips his head, and you carefully cup his jaw for support, disinfecting and applying ointment on the cuts and scrapes on his face. You also clean up the dried blood near his nostrils and on his bottom lip, and he doesn’t flinch even when you accidentally brush tender areas like his broken nose or the gash on his mouth. Instead, he stays perfectly still, leaned back in the chair with his forearms resting on his thighs and fingers nonchalantly laced together. 

He keeps his gaze trained on something past your shoulder, and you also try your best to focus, but it’s hard to keep yourself from staring―especially when his demeanor has changed so much. He’s so calm and quiet in such a cold, ruthless manner, as if he’s physically steeling himself from pain―like he’s done this a million times before. Occasionally, you feel his eyes swipe across your face when he thinks you’re not paying attention, and it occurs to you how close the two of you are. Suddenly, you’re acutely aware of the heat of his skin against your palm and fingertips, and you rip your hand away from his jaw. 

Clearing your throat, you move onto his hands, dabbing his raw knuckles with a cotton ball soaked in alcohol before placing large band-aids on them. Despite your best efforts, it’s hard not to notice how slim his long fingers are or how surprisingly clean his nail beds are for someone who’s covered in blood. You keep your head completely bent, fighting the urge of looking up and possibly meeting his eyes. 

“There, all done,” you announce a little too loudly. 

“Thank you,” he says softly, “for the cake and for this. For helping me.” 

“Don’t worry about it. I didn’t do much,” you blurt, still avoiding eye contact as you clean up the table. However, you notice in your peripheral that his gaze follows your movements, almost hesitantly, before he asks: 

“So, you’re hiring?” 

You click the first-aid kit shut, blinking a few times before turning back to him. He looks at you with a raised eyebrow, waiting for an answer.

“I―yeah. How did you know that?” you ask, puzzled by such a random question. 

Donghyuck points at a poster that you didn’t even know you left here, sitting on the table right behind you. You realize that he was probably looking at it while you were patching him up. 

“That poster that says ‘help wanted.’ With the Pompompurin stickers. I’m actually in between jobs right now, so if you would have me―”

“You know Pompompurin?” you interrupt him. It’s not that important and should not stand out to you as much as it does. Yet, you can’t help but grin at the fact that someone like him knows about a tubby Golden Retriever character with a name that sounds like a mashup of the English language’s most adorable onomatopeias. 

Donghyuck trails off, stiffening as if you just found out his deepest, darkest secret. He opens his mouth slightly, trying to speak but unable to formulate a response―an excuse, rather. Instead, he just lets out an airy cough, putting a hand over his mouth and turning away from you in an attempt to obscure his face. Despite his best efforts, he can’t hide his glowing red ears and the way his earlier coldness melts away.

“I―yeah,” he responds, words slightly muffled by his hand. 

You struggle to maintain your composure as you gnaw on your bottom lip to keep from laughing. Fighting a smile in your voice, you finally say: 

“The pay won’t be that much, but you’ll get a bunch of free desserts at the end of the day. Are you okay with that?” 

It takes him a moment to process that you’re offering him the job, and you watch his eyes light up and a warm smile overtake his face. There’s still a light shade of pink dusting his cheeks, clashing with the purple bruising and swelling of his injuries. 

“I’d love nothing more.”

Suddenly, it occurs to you that Donghyuck somewhat reminds you of a tiramisu. 

He may look a bit rugged and grimey, bitter like coffee, but in actuality, underneath it all, he’s soft and fluffy (but not too sweet) like a mascarpone filling. 

RECIPE 2. BLUEBERRY PIE

“Are you out of your mind?”

You cringe away from your phone, hurriedly turning the volume down. “Damn, you don’t have to scream like that.” 

“You should be the one screaming,” Yeri hollers. “I better not come over one day and find your body stuffed in the freezer or something.”

“I thought you wanted me to hire someone!” 

“Not some random dude off the side of the street who was covered in injuries and doesn’t even have any baking experience,” Yeri hisses. 

“I don’t need him to bake. I just have him working the front counter and doing all the heavy lifting when I get my ingredient shipments,” you protest. “Did you think I would really just hand over all my orders to some random dude and go party it up in Cancún or something?” 

Yeri is silent for several seconds before asking, “He’s hot, isn’t he?”

“What?”

“So you did know what I meant when I said you needed your back blown out.” You can hear the smugness in her voice. 

“Yeri,” you say tiredly, “please be serious.”

“I am serious. You’re the one being unserious,” she retorts. “Yesterday, you acted like you would rather sacrifice your firstborn child before hiring a part-timer, and now look at you. Dickmatized.” 

“Okay, I’m hanging up now.”

“So, when do I get to meet him―”

You quickly hit the button to end the call and shove your phone into your pocket, letting out an exasperated sigh. You definitely won’t be hearing the end of that for a while. Your face feels warm for some reason, and you decide that you need a coffee break. After you finish making it, you pour yourself and Donghyuck a cup. 

You peek your head out from the curtain that separates the kitchen and the front counter to see if Donghyuck is busy. He’s politely chatting with an elderly woman, and your eyes nearly pop out of your head when he takes out the entire tray of egg tarts in the glass display and wraps it up for her. The woman happily hands him a wad of bills and waves him goodbye. After putting the cash in the register, Donghyuck turns around and catches you in the middle of gawking. 

“Oh, Y/N. I was actually just about to head back there. We’re out of egg tarts for the display,” he says nonchalantly. 

“Uh, yeah, I can see that,” you whisper loudly, “Was that Mrs. Kim? Why the hell did she order a dozen egg tarts? That woman can barely finish a single cookie.” 

Donghyuck blinks, clearly confused, whispering back, “She asked for my recommendation, so I said egg tarts since no one had bought any yet, and she said she would take all of them.” 

You pause, things finally clicking. Grinning knowingly, you say, “You know, having you work the front is doing wonders for sales.” 

“I don’t understand.” He furrows his brows. 

You laugh, handing him his cup of coffee. “I’m talking about your face card, Donghyuck. You’re too handsome, so you’re flustering the customers.” 

“Are we not whispering anymore?” he asks awkwardly. “Besides, that’s not true. Look at the state of my face right now.” 

His injuries have faded significantly, but the bruising and cuts are still there. You want to tell him that superficial wounds can’t mask the warmth in his caramel-brown eyes, the fullness of his cheeks and the sharp jawline, and the air of mystery that enshrouds him and draws people in. 

But you don’t. 

“Well, for someone who’s only been working here for two weeks, you’re doing superb. Injuries or not.” 

And it’s true. You’ve always preferred to work alone because you’re the only one who understands how you want things done. You naturally assumed it would be a hassle and a waste of time to try to explain to someone else when you could just do it yourself, but Donghyuck never seems to need an explanation. In fact, he knows before even you. 

He gets to the bakery three hours before you, cleans and preps all the equipment you need for the day, unloads the ingredient shipments, and is already manning the front counter by the time you arrive like it was no big deal at all. He also seems to have a sixth sense of knowing when you’re about to do something you shouldn’t be, even though you downplayed your back injury. He’s somehow always there―moving all the stuff you keep on the top shelf to somewhere within your reach even though you insisted that the rickety wooden step stool you use is perfectly safe, cleaning up a glass beaker that you accidentally shattered, taking out the trash during his breaks, checking in on you when you skip lunch. He even turned down his first paycheck, saying it’s repayment for patching him up and feeding him. 

Donghyuck is so perfect that sometimes you wonder if you’re being set up, like maybe he’s secretly embezzling money from the cash register―which would be a more viable theory if he didn’t drive an Audi to work everyday. 

“Thanks for the compliment. And the coffee,” Donghyuck says, snapping you out of your thoughts. He gingerly takes a sip and makes a strangled noise, a mixture being choking and retching, before slapping a hand over his mouth. 

“Are you okay? Was it too hot?” you ask worriedly. 

“No, it’s just…really bitter,” he mumbles, words muffled in his hand. 

“Oh,” you blink, “Sorry. I drink black coffee, so I forgot to ask if you wanted creamer and sugar. Come on, there’s some in the back.” 

The two of you head to the kitchen, and you watch him dump an exorbitant amount of creamer and sugar in his coffee, the dark roast swirling into something more akin to milk tea.

“You know, there might be some chocolate milk in the fridge if you’d rather that,” you tease. 

His head shoots up, those doe eyes lighting up. “Really?” 

“No,” you trail off awkwardly, “Sorry, I'm just messing with you.” 

It’s a bit adorable that you can visibly see him being disappointed in there not being chocolate milk before growing embarrassed, looking down at his cup. He turns away from you, but you can see the flush on the back of his neck. 

“You really have a sweet tooth, huh?” you laugh. 

“Pretty lame, right?” 

“Why would that be lame? You’re talking to someone who owns a bakery, in case you forgot.” 

Donghyuck smiles at you, and it’s sugary sweet like buttercream frosting. He looks at you like you just said the most wonderful thing in the world; in fact, he always makes you feel like that, no matter what you say or do. “I guess you’re right.” 

“What’s your favorite dessert?” you blurt, needing a distraction urgently. 

He pauses briefly. “I don’t think I have one.”

That actually surprises you. “You don’t? Even though you love sweets so much?” 

He laughs, the sound harsh and rough, and it almost makes you flinch. “I’ve never really had an opportunity to have many until now.” 

There’s clearly weight behind his words, but you know you’re not in a position to ask any further. A selfish part of you wants to be important enough to him that you are in a position to know more, but you’re all too aware about him very purposefully keeping you at arm’s length. 

“Well, you have plenty of time to find out,” you quickly continue, pretending not to notice. “Actually, I’m going to a blueberry farm tomorrow because I’m thinking about adding blueberry pie to the menu. When I get back, I’ll bake one for you, and you can be the first to taste test it!” 

“You’re going by yourself?” Donghyuck raises an eyebrow. 

“Of course. Who else would I go with?” 

“Me. I’ll go with you,” he replies immediately. 

“But it’s, like, a forty-five-minute bus ride to the farm. Plus, coming with me to get ingredients isn’t part of your job description anyway,” you explain. 

“I can’t come with you on my own free time?” he asks, tilting his head. “Besides, I’m worried about you overexerting yourself with that back injury. A bumpy bus ride definitely isn’t going to help, so I’ll drive us there.” 

“You’re going to drive that fancy ass car to a farm? You do realize it’s going to be dirt roads, right?” You cross your arms. 

“I think I’ll live. Besides, what makes you think this is the only fancy ass car I own?” He gives you an amused smile. 

“You’re joking, right?” You stare at him. 

He hesitates for a moment. “Yes.” 

“That doesn’t sound―”

“What time are we leaving tomorrow morning?” 

“...Seven.”

.

.

.

Unsurprisingly, Donghyuck picks you up right on time, not a minute too early or late. As the universe would have it, it rained the night prior―meaning all the dirt roads are now rivers of mud. You wince every time you heard a splat of mud hit Donghyuck’s pristine white car, but he seems to pay no mind to it. The two of you arrive at the farm within twenty minutes (he found a shortcut), and because you came so early, you get the entire farm to yourselves. The staff arms both of you with a large wicker basket each before setting you loose onto the massive property. 

“Okay, make sure to pick the fat ones. The small ones are super tart, so avoid those,” you instruct Donghyuck. “We’re going to fill these baskets to the brim and get our money’s worth.” 

“You got it, Captain.” He salutes. 

You give him a determined nod and a thumbs up before turning to your respective side and beginning to pick the blueberries. The two of you work without much fanfare or conversation, and it’s a silence that lingers between you comfortably. It reassures you to hear the sound of the bushes rustling from Donghyuck working; his companionship alone relaxes you. 

Eventually, when the sun starts peeking through and the weather grows warmer, both of you decide to take a break. You find a spot in the shade before sitting down, pulling out snacks and bottles of water from a backpack Donghyuck brought along. 

“I have a surprise for you,” you tell him, trying to hide a smile. “Close your eyes.” 

He eyes you suspiciously but does so anyway. You fish out a handful of unripe blueberries wrapped in a handkerchief from your pocket and feed some to him. His reaction is nearly instant the moment he starts chewing them; you watch as his face puckers up from how sour they are and his entire body shrivels into itself, a shudder running through him. He’s polite enough to not spit them out, but you’re not polite enough to resist pointing and laughing at him. Throwing your head back, you laugh so hard that your stomach starts to hurt. 

“Oh my God, your face!” 

“Ugh,” Donghyuck groans, taking a big gulp of his water. “I should’ve known you had sinister intentions from the start.” 

“I didn’t think you’d react like that,” you finally manage to say after catching your breath. “You really can’t handle anything except for sweet stuff.” 

“Are you having fun bullying me?” He rolls his eyes. 

“So much fun,” you say in a sing-song voice. 

Donghyuck tries to continue feigning annoyance, but he can’t help the low chuckle that rumbles in his chest. His eyes always soften when he looks at you, and his gaze is intimate like a lover’s―gentle, tender, unwavering, and vulnerable. But his warmth is always fleeting, and he only allows you glimpses of it through the unmoving walls that he’s erected around himself. 

You wish he wouldn’t indulge you so, terrified you’ll try to cross the line he’s drawn between the two of you. 

“What are you thinking about?” Donghyuck asks, trying to read your expression

“About the delicious pie I’m about to make when we get back,” you smile. 

“I see,” he responds, though it’s clear he isn’t convinced. “I’m looking forward to it.”

“You better be. This is how I’m paying you back for driving me here,” you nod. 

“Instead of that, pay me back by telling me what your favorite dessert is,” he suddenly says. “I do still want the pie, though.” 

“That was random,” you snort. “Why do you want to know my favorite dessert?”

“Because you asked me, but you never told me yours.” 

You suppose he has a point, but you find it ironic that he wants to know more about you when he refuses to offer you even a modicum of information about himself. Despite this, you tell him anyway because you are obviously the fool here. 

“If you must know, it’s red velvet cake,” you sigh. 

“Why?” 

You don’t answer at first, carefully thinking about if you’re ready to be vulnerable in front of him―still a virtual stranger. A virtual stranger who loves sweets. A virtual stranger who is a bit of a messy eater. A virtual stranger who knows Pompompurin. A virtual stranger who worries about you even when he’s not on the clock. A virtual stranger who gently tells you to be careful whenever you try to do something dangerous, whispering, “I’ll do it instead.” A virtual stranger who allows his luxury car to be caked in mud for you. 

“Because it’s the dessert that made me realize I want to do this for the rest of my life,” you finally say. “I baked it for my mom’s birthday, and I think I ended up being more excited than her.” 

Donghyuck stays quiet, gauging your reaction. 

“I was in college, studying to be a doctor like everyone else in my family. So, like a dumb young person who thought that dreams were more important than money, I dropped out of college and went to culinary school. My parents told me I was ruining mine and their lives, disowned me, yada-yada―a bunch of depressing stuff, you know. Eventually, I graduated, took out a huge loan, and opened up my own bakery. Worked a bunch of part-time jobs until my business could stand on its own. Now here I am. Still in debt, though,” you laugh awkwardly. “But I’m not doing too shabby. I was able to hire you, so at least I have a little cash to spare.” 

He still doesn’t say anything, so you find yourself starting to ramble. You’re really not sure what possessed you to trauma dump on him like that. 

“You know, a lot of people talk shit about red velvet cake because they say the only thing that makes it special is the red food coloring,” you hurriedly explain, “but that’s not true. The cream cheese frosting is super important too. Also, I always say love is the most important ingredient of all. As a baker, you’re kind of baring your heart to the customer, and isn’t it kind of cute that red velvet cake is red like a heart? Okay, please say something now or else I think I’m going to projectile vomit.” 

Donghyuck reaches over and brushes a sweaty lock of hair out of your face. His fingers brush over your temple, which makes you sharply suck in a breath. You almost lean into his touch, but you catch yourself. His hand slightly lingers on the side of your neck, like he wants to bring your face closer, but he eventually pulls away. 

He searches your face, and you’re not sure what he’s looking for―if anything. Rather, perhaps he’s not searching. Perhaps he’s committing your features to his memory, as if the way you look right now is something he wants to remember forever. 

“You’ve worked hard, Y/N,” he says softly, voice slightly hoarse. “This is long overdue, but congratulations. You achieved your dream, and don’t let anyone ever discount that. Not even yourself.” 

You wonder how long you’ve waited to hear that. You’re not even sure you knew you needed to hear that. But when Donghyuck says it, it hits you just how long and hard you’ve worked all on your own without a single break. Throughout the years, you’ve really only ever heard, “I’m sorry that happened.” When was the last time someone congratulated you? When was the last time you congratulated yourself? 

You surge forward, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and burying your face in his shoulder. Donghyuck cradles you against him, one hand wound tightly around your waist while the other is tangled in your hair. You can feel his chest rise up and down as he holds you. He smells like lavender soap and a bit earthy from being outside, and the warmth of his skin against your cheek makes you want to close your eyes and fall asleep in his arms. 

“Thank you,” you whisper. 

“No, thank you,” he murmurs into your hair. 

You’re not sure why he’s thanking you instead, but what you are sure of is that you’re crossing the line, taking a step towards him and wondering if he’ll meet you halfway. 

.

.

.

“Tada!” you announce cheerfully, setting down the freshly baked blueberry pie onto the table. 

Donghyuck claps excitedly. “Holy shit, it looks amazing.” 

“I’m still trying to figure out the right portions for the filling, so let me know if you think there’s too much or little,” you tell him as you hand him a slice. 

Without even answering you, he stabs his fork into the pie and almost eats the entire slice in one bite, seemingly unbothered by the steam still rising from it. 

“Be careful. You’re going to burn your tastebuds off. I’m not letting you eat it for shits and giggles, you know. This is for research purposes.” You cross your arms. 

“It’s perfect, Y/N. I’m serious,” Donghyuck says after swallowing. “The filling isn’t too sweet, and the crust is airy and light.” 

“Well, alright, Gordon Ramsay. I think we’re going to be adding a new menu item then,” you smile. “Think you can get Mrs. Kim to buy a dozen of these?”

“I don’t think she’ll need much convincing with how good these taste.” 

“You’re so easy,” you tease. “All I need to do is feed you. Anyways, I’m going to clean up here, but you should head home. It’s getting late, and you wake up way earlier than me.” 

“I’ll help,” he insists. 

“Go,” you order, pointing at the door. “I can handle it.” 

He looks conflicted but eventually relents when you threaten to physically kick him out. Before he leaves, he turns back to you and says, “Thank you, Y/N.”

“Why do you keep thanking me?” you laugh. 

“It’s been a long time since I’ve had this.”

“What? A blueberry pie?”

Donghyuck pauses, a slight wonder in his expression, as if he’s realizing his answer for the first time as well.

“Peace.” 

And you think maybe this is a step forward for him too. 

RECIPE 3. CREAM PUFF

It’s quite surreal how easily and naturally you and Donghyuck fall into a routine together. Somehow, in the blink of an eye, two weeks becomes two months. You’ve learned the little things about him, like how he always swipes some icing before you can fill up the piping bag or that he’s not a coffee drinker at all (more of a hot cocoa person) or that he purses his lips when a dessert he’s testing tastes off (no matter how hard he tries to hide it) or that he involuntarily sticks his arm out in front of you when he wants to stop you from doing something you shouldn’t. 

You also notice that he sometimes comes into work with injuries. They’re not nearly as bad as the first time you met him, but it’s hard to ignore a bruised cheek or bloodied knuckles. He always has a reason for them, whether it’s tripping down the stairs or accidentally falling down and scraping his hands on the concrete. You can tell by the way he laughs it off that he doesn’t plan on telling you the truth, so you laugh with him. The two of you, having taken only a step towards one another, find yourselves completely immobile now. 

He always does this: envelops you like a cloud but disappears the moment you reach out for him. 

You’re honestly not sure why he’s still here. Your injury has long healed, and he clearly doesn’t need the abysmal pay you’re giving him. He feels like he’ll slip away at any moment, fleeting like a warm spring breeze, and you suppose time flies by when you know it’s limited. Despite knowing that, you can’t help but desperately want him to stay. 

“I think it’s cute how hard he’s working,” Yeri randomly says one day as she eyes Donghyuck prepare orders in the front. He’s in the middle of a lunchtime rush, so he doesn’t even notice the two of you watching him like weirdos.

“Well, that’s what I’m paying him to do,” you reply, rolling his eyes. 

“Oh, I think the money is the least of his worries here,” she hums, taking a sip of her coffee. 

She has a point, but you’re pretty sure she’s implying something else as well. Just as you go to ask her what exactly she means, you hear a loud clatter. Flinching, you turn your attention back to Donghyuck and realize that he’s dropped a tray on the floor. However, the tray is the last thing on your mind when you see the expression on his face. It’s a mixture of horror, anger, and almost sadness―like he’s finally come face-to-face with whatever he’s been running from. It makes your blood run cold. 

Donghyuck is looking at a boy around his age; the boy has dark hair, a mole under his eye, and a grim expression. More importantly, he’s covered in injuries too. 

“Who is that?” Yeri whispers. “Why does Donghyuck look like he’s seen a ghost?” 

Maybe because he has, you want to tell her. 

Donghyuck grabs the boy's arm, squeezing so tightly that his knuckles turn white, and mumbles something to him. When he turns around and meets your eyes, he looks pained and fearful as if you witnessed something you shouldn’t have.

“Is it okay if I take my break early today?” he asks calmly, though the tremor in his voice gives him away. 

You nod hesitantly, unable to force yourself to speak. You watch him as he drags the boy out; when he passes you, you can tell how tightly his body is wound right now. His jaw is clenched, a muscle spasming as he tries to control himself, and every step he takes seems labored. He’s running on pure adrenaline right now, like he’s physically steeling himself. 

However, you don’t think he’s ever appeared so incredibly alone before. As you watch his back disappear further and further from your view, you’re unsure if he’ll ever return, and you never imagined how terrifying that would be. 

.

.

.

The cream puffs aren’t rising.

You’re crouched in front of the oven, watching the dough remain flat and lifeless. You should’ve known better than to attempt to make cream puffs on such a shitty day, especially when pastries like these are so sensitive to the environment and atmosphere. Even though you know you should probably just scrap them and try again, you wait for just a little longer, hoping that maybe if you wish hard enough that they’ll magically start to rise. 

But then again you suppose that no matter how hard you try, no matter how careful you are, no matter how perfect the batter is, no matter how much time you spend time piping them, no matter how much you want them to rise, they won’t. 

You decide that Donghyuck isn’t like a tiramisu at all; he’s sensitive and delicate and elusive and frustrating like a cream puff. 

“Y/N, they’re burning.” 

Losing your balance and nearly falling over, you gasp loudly. You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn’t even hear Donghyuck walk into the kitchen, nor did you smell the undeniable scent of something being burnt to a crisp. 

“Oh, fu―!” you curse, hurriedly opening the oven and casually suffocating both you and Donghyuck with a hot plume of air. Sputtering, you look around and grab a random rag from the sink before reaching for the cream puffs. 

“Wait, stop!” Donghyuck stops you with an outstretched arm, his hand pressed to your side. “Let me do it.” 

He gently takes the rag from your hand and removes the tray of charred cream puffs from the oven, dumping them into the trash before putting the tray in the sink and running some water on it―just how you like it. 

Letting out a relieved sigh, he turns back to you and asks, “Are you okay? It’s not like you to make a mistake like that. You didn’t get burned anywhere, did you?” 

When you don’t answer immediately, Donghyuck rushes forward and grabs your hands, carefully examining your fingers and arms. “Wait, are you hurt? Where? Tell me where you got burned. We have to cool it down with some lukewarm water. And don’t just say you’re fine. Burns are not a joke, Y/N―why are you looking at me like that?” 

His hands are calloused and rough, and you can still see scabs from where he tore his knuckles, yet he touches you like you’re the delicate one. He’s covered in fresh and old wounds, yet he looks so panicked at the thought of you having a scratch. 

“Shut up,” you whisper furiously, ripping your hands away from him. “From now on, don’t ask me another question. It’s my turn to ask you questions.” 

He blinks, a bit stunned by your reaction, but it’s clear he knows what you’re about to say. He goes to reach for you again but decides against it. “Okay.” 

“Who was that guy?” you demand. “Why are you always covered in injuries? Why did you lie to me? Who are you?” 

“He’s an old friend,” Donghyuck starts quietly. 

“Do you treat all your friends like that?” 

“When I don’t want to see them.” 

You wait for him to continue.

“Before I met you, he and I and a few of our other friends worked…odd jobs for cash,” he explains, and he looks like he’s choking on every word. “The jobs usually entailed us hurting people and also getting hurt. I did a lot of shit I wasn’t proud of. At the time, I didn’t really care. It was just nice to feel something, whether it was the adrenaline rush from doing the punching or the pain from being punched. I got a bunch of money, bought a bunch of expensive stuff, but none of it mattered. Eventually, I just felt nothing again. I didn’t even have the energy to loathe myself anymore. So, I took one last job, got the shit kicked out of me, and then I left. That’s when you found me―”

He inhales, and his eyes flicker towards you. He gazes at you so longingly, as if you were impossibly out of his reach, that you can’t help but involuntarily take a step towards him. 

But he steps back. 

“I thought that working here would make me feel like a human being again, but I didn’t realize how much I would―” He pauses again. “I thought working here would be a nice reset for me, but I naively thought that I could completely leave my past behind. My friends eventually found me, and I guess I care about those reckless assholes more than I thought because they managed to convince me to take on a few more jobs with them. That’s why I’ve been coming to work with injuries. But I’m done. I cut them off for good when they walked into this bakery. I don’t want…I don’t want our past to tarnish this place. I want to keep this place a beautiful, warm, and pure safe haven that you worked so hard for it to be. That’s why I lied to you, Y/N. I’m a coward to the bone, and I was envious of you. I was ashamed to admit it to you. You, who had the courage to chase after your dream. You, who had the kindness to help a good-for-nothing asshole like me. I only want you to have happy memories from now on, and I am not one of them.” 

“Are you going to leave?” you ask softly. 

“I probably should,” he answers shakily. 

“What’s stopping you?” 

“Just…one reason.” 

“When you say it like that, it makes it sound like the reason is me.” 

Donghyuck laughs bitterly, and his eyes drag across your face like every movement hurts him.

“You know it’s you. It’s always been you.” 

When you reach for his hand, he turns away like just the warmth from your body heat burns him. So instead, you take a step back. 

“I won’t ask you to stay, Donghyuck, I won’t chase you. I’m going to wait right here, and it’s up to you if you're going to meet me halfway.” 

RECIPE 4. RED VELVET CAKE

When your alarm clock goes off the next morning, you seriously consider just not showing up to work. It’s not like you can be fired for being a no-show when you’re your own boss, after all. 

And it’s not like you have any employees who will be expecting you. 

You’ll just apologize to Mrs. Kim and your other regulars later. You’re allowed to have a day where you just rot in bed and feel sorry for yourself. 

However, no matter how much you tell yourself that, you find yourself crawling out of bed and getting ready anyway. You can’t seem to brutally crush that small glimmer of hope that Donghyuck might still be there, no matter how hard you try. When you see yourself in the mirror, you recoil in horror. Your eyes are almost swollen shut from the amount of crying you did last night, and your face is sallow and lifeless. 

So much for putting on a brave face, you think wryly to yourself. You tried so hard to look tough, when in reality, you bawled your eyes out and even considered praying to God for Donghyuck to stay. It’s a humiliating and humbling reality check. 

“Stand up right now,” you sharply tell yourself in the mirror. “He’s just some guy. Get it together.” 

You do your best to clean up your appearance and make the trek over to the bakery. It takes another internal pep talk before you can make your way to the door. After you finally walk up, you see that the lights inside are off. Your stomach sinks, and your eyes start to burn. Even though you’re holding the handle, you can’t bring yourself to open the door. It’s an outcome that you expected, yet you wonder why it hurts so badly. 

“You liar,” you mumble to yourself, “You said you only wanted me to have happy memories.” 

Once you make your way inside, you numbly head towards the kitchen, trying to remember what exactly you have to do today. Oh right, now that he’s not here, you also have to make sure all the ingredients are prepped first. 

When you walk into the kitchen, you do a double-take. 

The whole place looks like it’s been completely ransacked: used pans and utensils piled up in the sink, two opened boxes of cake mix, containers of ingredients without lids on on the tables, random lumps of flour and egg shells strewn about― 

And right in front of the oven is Donghyuck, flour in his hair and frosting on his nose. He’s holding a cake stand with…you think it’s supposed to be a cake on it? The shape is mangled and haphazardly cut, but it has echoes of a heart. The frosting is a hot mess, as if a bird with diarrhea shat all over the cake. The batter is clearly underbaked and makes the cake look gooey in a bad way. 

“Um, I promise I’ll clean all of this up in a second, but I wanted to surprise you,” Donghyuck starts awkwardly. “It’s not perfect, but I tried making a red velvet cake for you.” 

You stare at him, still not sure how to react. 

“You once said that baking is like baring your heart to the customer and that love is the most important ingredient of all,” he laughs softly to himself. “I think love is the only ingredient I managed to get right, but I’m baring my heart to you now, Y/N. I’m sorry I hid everything and lied to you, but I’m in love with you. Hopelessly so. All my life, I’ve chased a feeling, not knowing what it was. But now I do. I don’t think I knew how to feel until I met you. I never once thought I would ever have a purpose in my life, but you make me want to be a normal, proper member of society. Your dream is my dream. I want to wake up at 5AM and sell egg tarts with you for the rest of my life, if you’ll have me.” 

Donghyuck sets the cake down on a table in front of you, and you notice that his fingers are dyed red from the food coloring. It almost reminds you of when you first met him, except his injuries have been replaced with red food coloring, flour, and cream cheese frosting. 

“This cake is terrible,” you smile, “how did you butcher it that badly when you used cake mix?” 

You watch him blush all the way down to his neck, as he sheepishly looks away. “Don’t make fun of me. I really tried my best. I stayed up watching tutorials―” 

Leaning across the table, you cup his face with both hands and kiss him, brushing your thumbs across his cheekbones. He tastes like frosting, hot cocoa, and your prayers being answered. The way he kisses you back is bruising, dizzying and knocking any coherent thought out of your head, his hands finding your hips and anchoring you to him. He kisses you like you’re the sweetest and most wonderful thing he’s ever tasted.

When you finally pull away, it takes you a moment to regain feeling in your legs. Donghyuck presses his forehead against yours, lips brushing against yours once again as the two of you try to catch your breath. 

“I think I’m going to have to fire you, though,” you whisper. “You know, with me being your boss and all. The power dynamic is too weird.” 

He hums, pausing for thought. “Then how about I become your business partner?” 

“What?”

Donghyuck reaches into his pocket and fishes out his wallet, pulling out a shiny and fancy-looking credit card. He hands it to you without much fanfare. 

“I have a lot of money, you know. So I’m going to invest in your business. Use it as you’d like,” he casually announces.

You stare at him, your jaw hanging wide open. He never tried to hide from you that he was rich, but he never told you that he was rich rich. 

“Well, damn! Why didn’t you show me this earlier? I would have forgiven you a lot sooner,” you tease, slapping him on the arm. “Are you sure you want to give this to me? I’m quite the gold-digger, you know.”

“When I told you to use it as you’d like, I meant me as well,” Donghyuck replies, shrugging.

“You’re insane.” You hope he can’t tell how much your face is burning up. 

“I guess I am,” he laughs, and you don’t think he’s ever looked so free. You want to tell him that you hope he only has happy memories from now on too. You want to tell him that you’ll rewrite all of his scars with sugary and fluffy desserts so that they won’t ever hurt again. 

And for the first time in your life, you feel it too.

Peace. 

EXTRA

“So, have you figured out what your favorite dessert is?” 

Donghyuck stirs slightly, groaning, as he wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you closer. He slips his hand under your shirt (well, technically it’s his shirt) and rests it on your bare hip bone. 

“Why aren’t you asleep?” 

“Because I’m curious.” 

“If I answer, will you let me rest?”

“Depends on how good your answer is.” 

“Blueberry pie. That’s my answer.” 

You smile against the crook of his neck. 

“Why?” 

"Aren't we supposed to eat watermelon in the summer?" Donghyuck interrupts you to ask.

"Real watermelon enjoyers eat watermelon no matter what time of the year it is–Hyuck!" you scream after he makes a sudden move to grab a piece of fruit from the bowl and half his index finger ends up covered in black nail polish. "Stop moving your hand!"

"I'm sorry!"

He apologizes and stays still in front of your body, legs crossed and knees touching yours. Donghyuck is so close you can feel his breath in your hair, and even though you know it's impossible for him to hear your heart-rate increasing exponentially, you fear the closeness and the intimacy may give you away. Honestly, by this time you thought you might have figured it out: you had to either rethink your relationship and conclude that you were only going to be friends forever, or accept your feelings and confess to him, no matter what the outcome could be.

But you find yourself finishing Donghyuck's nails and looking up to him, who was–as more often as you thought–already looking at you. He smiles to you sweetly, no teeth on sight, and he looks ridiculous. Donghyuck is wearing a sheet mask with the form of a peach, yet you still find the sight in front of you incredibly endearing. The worst part about it is that you're looking as ridiculous as him, with the lemon-shaped sheet mask covering your face. You feel his thumb gently caress the back of your hand that he was still holding even long after you've finished. And as his soft features are illuminated by the warm dim lights of the lamp and the TV, as he holds your hand and looks at you as if you might be the prettiest lemon he has seen, you get that feeling again.

The comfort, the domesticity. The urge to be his companion, to share moments like this and many more. Every day.

Your phone buzzes as you set an alarm to take the masks off twenty minutes ago.

Donghyuck lets your hand go. He lets go of your heart too—but only for a second. He cradles your face, his soft fingertips pet your jaw, then your cheeks, and you can't hold his gaze anymore. You want to look down, drop your head before you start word-vomiting everything you're feeling and you've been feeling for him since the moment you met, since that first time he cooked ramen for you and you decided you wanted it to be your comfort food forever.

Donghyuck won't let you look down, though. He applies pressure with his fingers in the place where your neck and your jaw meet and with his thumbs on your cheeks. Your lips naturally pout under the pressure and you see it. Donghyuck. Your best friend. The guy you've liked forever now, looking at your lips for what you think it's been like the fourth time this weekend. And it's only been hours since the weekend started.

Is it really going to happen? Are you about to kiss Donghyuck right now? On the living room's couch on a saturday night in, under the dim lights, while Silk Sonic's Love's Train plays in the background and you're wearing fruit-shaped sheet masks?

It is fucking romantic.

Yet it never comes.

It doesn't happen.

Donghyuck just says: "It's time to take the masks off."

And you agree because, well, what the hell are you supposed to do? Just throw yourself all over him like you, maybe, have been imagining? Donghyuck takes your mask off your skin and you take his, that leaves his face looking the softest and smelling like sweet peaches. That definitely doesn't help your situation.

You're incredibly frustrated. Upset, even, like a kid who got denied his candy. (You wish Donghyuck was your candy.) You hate this sleepover now and even wish Mark was here to cock-block the entire situation. That would be less upsetting.

"And?" He asks once both of you have your masks off. "Do I look cuter now?"

Oh, so he's aware he's already incredibly cute.

You can't contain a smile. He's only centimeters away from you after he quickly moves back to look for his glasses. You feel the need to poke his cheeks that look as soft as marshmallows and smell like fucking peaches. Actually, you might feel the need to eat him.

But you don't dare say anything. Only trying to hide your smile looking down, as your face grows red, you let Donghyuck think of his own conclusions after your reaction.

Thing is, you're kind of a coward.

Donghyuck says it's time to netflix and chill, and you laugh because the statement is followed by a "Literally. Don't start thinking about something dirty."

He places himself on the mattress on the floor (the one you've been sleeping since you arrived), a bunch of pillows supporting his back, and makes room for you. He's cheeky enough to pat his stomach to tell you to lie there, between his legs and over his body. Just like that, as if you hadn't been melting before just by holding his hand in yours or having your knees touch. And now he wants you to lie on his stomach?

Are you really that close? If so, why isn't he your boyfriend yet?

You open your eyes wider and point a finger at yourself. "Me. Me?" Your voice comes out full of disbelief.

"Not you. Mark," he says with a roll of his eyes. "Of course it's you! Unless you don't want to lay together?"

"I mean…"

How do you make it sound not so desperate, not too obvious?

You just shrug and say, "Yeah, sure."

Aced it.

Donghyuck's body feels like the softest mattress you've ever laid on, like you could close your eyes and sleep trapped in his limbs forever. And because of the closeness, you can sense the vibrations of his voice traveling from his torso to your ears. His tone is quiet and gentle, talking about what to watch to no one in particular because, even though he's talking to you, you're too concentrated on opening your camera and capturing the moment in a video of the two of you.

"Look how cute," you say, moving your arm to his eye level to show him the video. "You talk in pout when you're really concentrated."

When you're conscious of the surroundings once again, you're sure you've replayed the video with a smile on your face like ten times.

"You should upload that."

"I've posted enough about you," you reply to his suggestion, going back and saving the video to your drafts. "People are gonna think you're my boyfriend or whatever…"

"Would that be so bad?" Donghyuck questions with his eyes fixed on the TV screen. When you move your head back to look up at him, he dares to connect eyes with you. "People thinking I'm your boyfriend?"

Sunday, 12:02 p.m.

Donghyuck had always been clingy.

Yet you didn't know he could be this clingy in the mornings.

Mark has been trying to get Donghyuck out of bed for like ten minutes now, but he won't get up. While your brother is pulling his arm out, Donghyuck pulls Mark's arm in, asking him to join him and sleep 'just a little more'.

Yes, your brother found you both sleeping on the mattress in the living room. No, you and Donghyuck were not clinging to each other (sadly). But Hyuck was for sure clinging to your brother now.

"Mark!" He protests in a sleepy tone. "What do you want if you won't come in?"

"We were supposed to have brunch together," your brother tells Donghyuck again, yet he must be too sleepy to process what's happening.

"I won't go." Donghyuck states and doesn't even open his eyes again. The living room is clear enough, as the winter sun has been hitting for hours now. But it isn't an impediment for him to curl up under the blankets like a burrito and go back to sleep.

Mark drops his shoulders and allows himself to sigh, finally defeated by his heavy-sleeper best friend. "I guess it's just you and me, y/n."

—

Fortunately for you, the weather has been amazing since you arrived in the city where your brother lives. Saturday was no different, with a clear blue sky above your heads despite it being winter, and the sun shining just the right amount to touch your skin and leave it warm. A little breeze messes with you and your brother's freshly dyed hair as you sit outside a coffee shop, brunch almost all devoured on the table. Mark hums to a familiar jazzy tune that plays all the way from inside the café.

And the atmosphere is beautifully calm. But you need to get something out of your chest. For once.

"So," you start and Mark moves eyes from his food to set them on you, expectant of your next words with a mouth full of pancakes and fruit. "I think I like Donghyuck."

Mark starts coughing after hearing you, and you wonder if it is because of the shock of your confession or because he really is that careless to get the food stuck in his throat.

"Yeah, I knew," he confirms once it's clear for him to speak again.

"The fuck you mean 'you knew'?"

"I mean, honestly, it's pretty obvious." Your brother can't hide a smile. He drops the fork to properly talk to you this time. "Like, you've always had some kind of thing… I don't know, I thought I had a special connection with Hyuck," he says pointing at himself, eyes wide with what could look like a little bit of shock. "But you two… You two are something else."

"Oh God," you cover your face in embarrassment even though after your brother's words there's no point in hiding anything anymore. "So you've been watching me acting like a fool in love around Donghyuck all this time, and you said nothing."

"I didn't say anything 'cuz I thought it had to come from you." He shrugs. "Wanted you to feel comfy enough to tell me, even though I had my suspicions, obviously."

"May I ask… Why," you hesitate a little before asking for a third-person perspective. "Why were you suspicious about it?"

"Dude, I don't know," a small laughter escapes him. "You just look like you'd be all over each other if you could."

You just groan in frustration hearing your brother saying you might have been way more obvious than you thought you were. Temperature rises to your cheeks coloring them a little red, and not because of the midday sun hitting right from above your head.

"And you can," Mark says, yet you don't get it, the tilting of your indicating he has to clarify. "Like, you can be all over each other. I don't know why nothing has happened between the two of you yet."

"'Cuz I don't know if he likes me?"

"How could you know if you don't try?"

Your gaze drops to your lap, and you realize you've been playing with the rings of your hands, taking them off and putting them on over and over, indicating the conversation is making you a little nervous.

Mark must notice, since he keeps talking. "Just tell him, dude. Best case scenario, he also likes you, you move out together and make me free from Donghyuck's ass."

The way he puts it makes you laugh, yet there's a slight weight to your eyes, as if tears could start falling down slowly at any time after holding your feelings in for so long. So you take a deep breath, blink a few times and look at the sun.

The sun, shining in its maximum splendor in the middle of the sky. And you wonder what he's doing right now. Donghyuck, or Haechan, as his mother used to call him when he was little. Full Sun, because he's always so bright and energetic, like a happy virus (Mark would also call him a pain in the ass, but you see, it depends on who you ask.)

"Worst case scenario, you remain as good friends," Mark continues. "C'mon, you know him, he's not a dick. You just gotta try talking to him."

You gulp and nod at him, now trying to make eye contact with a subtle smile on your face. Another deep breath. "You're right. Donghyuck won't hurt me, no matter what the outcome is."

Monday, 01:43 a.m.

On Mark's phone...

Meanwhile at the livingroom...

"Hyuck–wait. Can't we go slower?!"

"Look at that!" Donghyuck screams pointing at the TV screen, after taking the airpod off his right ear. You do the same with the one you were using, and the music from the game stops playing in your head. "I got a perfect score!" And he continues to do a silly victory dance, moving his hips from side to side with his arms in the air.

You really don't want to be mad at Donghyuck right now.

"This is so unfair," you tell him, stepping out of the frame and leaving the remote on top of the game console. "You didn't tell me you were this good. And you know I can't dance at all."

"You're right," Donghyuck says sincerely, a hand on his chest, right in front of his heart and all. "I didn't tell you I'm a dancing god and took advantage of your poor dancing skills to win the Just Dance."

You really don't want to get mad at him, but sometimes he makes it pretty much impossible.

"You." A hand comes in contact with Donghyuck's arm. Your hand. "Dirty." Another slap. "Bastard." And another one. "I hate you so much!"

"Hey!" He protests rubbing his arm after you slapped it. "Lying is a sin."

"I'm not lying," you say. "I hate you. You put on the fastest choreo to follow."

Donghyuck follows you around to the kitchen and watches your every move. He's right behind you, his eyes following your motions when you fill a glass with water, when you gulp it down, when you clean it and leave it back on the counter. He's hot on your heels when you come back to the common area and take the inflatable mattress out to get ready to sleep. He's still following your moves carefully when you put on the sheets and when you lay on it with the remote of the TV in hand. He only takes his eyes off your body when the Netflix logo appears on the screen and he notices you're about to watch the show you two started together.

You know he's dying for a word from you.

"You don't mean it," he says, now free of all mocking tones.

"I don't mean what?"

"You don't hate me."

You're pretty sure Donghyuck doesn't need you to confirm that you weren't serious. Naturally, he has always shown himself as a very self-assured and friendly person; It's not normal that people don't like Donghyuck. However, when you meet his eyes, wide and expectant of your response, and perhaps wet with a little insecurity, you understand that things are not always what they seem.

"How could I ever hate you, Hyuck?" you tell him to extend a hand in his direction, inviting him to lay on your side on the mattress. 

Relief takes over his expression, and a wide smile is plastered on his face. He's quick to get comfortable (maybe too comfortable, not that you really mind) laying his head on your lap, and moving your left hand to his hair that looks like it's got longer over the days. You know he wants you to play with it—Donghyuck loves getting his hair played with. The fourth episode of My First First Love starts playing on the TV screen, and you hear Donghyuck sigh contentedly.

The subtle strokes at the hair on his nape get Donghyuck smiling again and exhaling deeper at your tranquil touch. And, not to be biased, but the colored lights coming from the TV highlight the softest, most beautiful face features you've seen in your life. In an act of courage, you move your fingertips from his hair, to his sharp jaw, to his cheekbones, gently caressing the warm skin.

Donghyuck moves his head on your lap until he's no longer watching TV. Neither are you. You're just staring at each other in silence. He's letting you stroke every part of skin until  the tip of your fingers make it to his lips. His plump pink lips that have been tempting you more and more the past days. And he places a kiss there. On the tip of your fingers.

You freeze and grow red. Then he places another kiss, and another, making it three the times you've felt Donghyuck's lips on your skin.

It may be driving you crazy.

He's careful with his movements, so careful it turns almost painful watching him. Donghyuck grabs your wrist and gets up to sit beside your spot on the mattress. Doesn't let go of your hand—instead,  he holds it tenderly, caresses the back of it with his thumb, then places another kiss there.

Four times you've felt Donghyuck's lips on your skin. Five. Six—he just placed a kiss on your palm. Wait, another on your wrist. That's seven kisses so far.

But it's not enough. Now you've felt his lips you want them everywhere, all the time. So when he gets your hand closer to keep kissing you there, you grab his face. Feel the skin there, of his jaw, of his neck, and it's really hot. You think you might even feel the rapid pace of his pulse when you press your fingers on his neck (but it could also be your own.) Lastly, you tangle your fingers in his hair that he has let grow during these weeks of winter break. You tug on it a little, just enough to let him know you want him close. Closer, please.

And Donghyuck sighs, more like he fucking moans.

You wonder if you should say something before moving forward. What about all the things you talked to Mark yesterday? Should you tell him about how you feel before kissing him? What does he want? And what would this be after you kiss?

The call of your name interrupts your torment of thoughts.

"Please," he begs in a whisper, eyes closed as your noses brush against each other. "I'll die if I don't kiss you right now."

A laugh comes out of you because he always has to be that exaggerated, but you decide to set all questions aside for a moment to just dive into him.

He starts off very gently, with his slightly parted lips pressing against yours. They are indeed as fleshy and soft as they look, and taste like a cherries lipbalm. Donghyuck repeatedly places small kisses on your lips until you open your mouth a little more, and he captures your lower lip, biting a bit there. It gets another little tug on his hair from you, a sigh of relief after tasting his mouth after years of longing, and everything becomes more needy.

Donghyuck grabs at both sides of your head to deepen the kiss, smashing lips together repeatedly and kissing you sloppily. When you allow him to, he pushes his tongue into your mouth and you push your body closer to his.

He grabs your wrist not neglecting your lips even a second, as if the both of you were magnetized, and places his palm on your waist inviting you to his lap. It makes you laugh out of nervousness, so Donghyuck opens his eyes to watch you straddle him and place yourself on top of him very carefully.

His touch travels from your waist to the sides of your torso, his right hand in a place that you're sure allows Donghyuck to feel your increased heart rate. Your hands cradle his neck, then tug at the hair of his nape as he observes you kind of mesmerized, inhaling deeply, smiling a little and wetting his lips before you're diving into each other once again.

You've lost count of the amount of times you've felt Donghyuck's sweet lips on you by now. But you're sure of one thing: you don't want it to be the last.

"In case you were still wondering," he breaks the kiss to talk to you. "I like you, kinda a lot."

His hair is slightly disheveled from all the pulling, his lips are shiny and swollen, and he looks a little agitated. In his incredibly dilated black pupils you can see the reflection of your smile.

"I also like you, Hyuck," you finally confess to him. "I like you like, a huge amount."

He lets out a sigh of relief, more like a scream, and you're quick to cover his mouth reminding him that your brother is supposed to be sleeping five meters away from you. Yet, you can't help but laugh at his reaction.

He presses your foreheads together as his hands caress your sides, from your knees, to your waist, and to your lower back. Both your thumbs stroke his cheeks gently before you move to place some smooches there, in each of Donghyuck's moles (that is all over his face.) You think of all the times you imagined doing exactly that and find it hard to believe there's a possibility you could have Donghyuck any time you want now.

You only have to talk it out and see how things could progress between the two of you in the future. In the meantime, you'll keep smooching the literal personification of the sun (that might be because he feels hot as fuck right now, or because his smile is bright as the sun, or maybe he could be both.)

(Still) Monday, 01:00 p.m.

Donghyuck has had his head over the clouds since last night. After a heavy make-out session with you and some cuddling, he went back to his shared bedroom to sleep at like four a.m., being the most quiet possible to not wake your brother up and maybe having him asking what the hell was Donghyuck doing with you in the living room until four in the morning. He can’t escape the knowing smile Mark gives him though, when he wakes up and sees Donghyuck already up and working at his desk.

Donghyuck pretends everything is normal, greeting Mark good morning as usual.

“Good morning, Melk.”

“You sound too happy,” Mark groans in response, still sitting on his bed only half awake.

Donghyuck checks the time on the corner of his computer; one p.m. during holidays is like eight a.m. to Mark. Your brother just sits there for a while and Donghyuck goes back to studying for amoment, until the silence of the room gets interrupted.

“Yo,” Mark calls to attract Donghyuck’s attention. “What you did last night was fucking nasty.”

“What–” Donghyuck tries asking, only to have Mark interrupting him.

“I heard you two going at it," he starts with a very serious expression that gets Donghyuck's blood completely drained from his face. What could've Mark possibly heard? "My sister was telling you to go slower and everything.'' Mark makes some gagging sounds to add to his point and Donghyuck grows as equally embarrassed and amused at your brother’s assumptions.

“You think we fucked?” Donghyuck asks in complete disbelief. An exaggerated nervous laugh follows the question. “With you in the house?” He points a finger at Mark.

“You didn’t?”

“Sorry to tell you what you heard was us playing Just Dance. The last choreo was too hard and y/n couldn’t follow it.”

Donghyuck watches his best friend rub the sleep off his eyes and get up from the bed while he denies with his head, looking kind of defeated. “You’re both the biggest losers I’ve ever known,” Mark says, referring to you and Donghyuck.

“Hey!” Donghyuck starts to defend himself, his eyes grow bigger as his brows go up, and the characteristic Donghyuck pout starts to show, like in every situation a discussion is involved. “It was fun! We had a good time, ask her.”

“Losers made for each other, I swear.” Mark emphasizes his point. “So you didn’t fuck.”

Donghyuck doesn't look up from his math notes to answer. There's no way in hell he's having this conversation looking at Mark in the face. “By now, I’m sure I might be a virgin again.”

“Dude, what the fuck,” Mark can’t contain a laugh, though. “That’s bad for your health. Get your dick wet already.”

“I’m just waiting for the right time with your sister.”

“Hey! You can’t joke like that anymore.” Donghyuck knows by Mark’s tone all the bickering has become dead-serious now. It has always been like this when it’s about you. First they joke a little about it, then Donghyuck reminds Mark how much he truly likes you, and lastly Mark tells Donghyuck to just confess to you already because he’s tired of hearing about it. “If you’re joking about my sister I’m gonna beat you up.” Mark reminds him.

“Sorry.” This time, Donghyuck is brave enough to face his best friend. It’s kind of hard for Donghyuck to believe it when Mark tells him he’s getting beated up, though, when Mark’s wearing the pajamas Johnny got him as a gift recently–some blue panty with a moose on the back that says ‘don’t moose with me’. “I’m not joking about her.”

“I know.” Mark covers the pajamas that distract his friend so much as he puts on his jeans. “You like each other so much it’s disgusting.”

Donghyuck can’t hide his smile after hearing that, and it reminds him of all the kisses you shared last night, which makes him grow red in the face. Nothing a little more bickering with your brother can’t hide.

“You’re sooo cruel to me, Markie.” Donghyuck tries to hug Mark before he’s leaving the room, but morning Mark has always been like a stray cat who doesn’t like affection (unless it comes from Yuta, which Donghyuck can’t comprehend very well but he supposes the japanese has something pretty magnetic.)

“Get off of me!”

“Only a lil’ kiss, pleaaase!”

They struggle at the door of the room and into the common area. Donghyuck with his lips millimeters from Mark's face while Mark tries with all his might to get away from Donghyuck, who can be like a tick. They're so caught up in their things neither of them has noticed you're there, observing the entire interaction.

“Why don’t you go and kiss y/n? I’m sure she’ll enjoy it,” you hear Mark say when he finally frees himself from Donghyuck.

It’s at this moment that you know you are hearing too much, so you clear your throat to let them know that you are there too. They both freeze after turning around and seeing you sitting at the kitchen island. Your brother Mark, the great opportunist and master at escaping from uncomfortable situations, greets you good morning and is off to work in a second, leaving you and Donghyuck alone in the apartment.

You watch Donghyuck get closer to where you’re sitting. He hasn’t changed from his sleeping shorts and the hoodie he was wearing last night–the same hoodie you pulled on as you kissed in the same mattress laying meters behind him. Yet you don’t know how to describe the sensation you’re feeling right now. After seeing the boy you like the most fighting your brother for a kiss, your stomach feels… weird? You know the kind of relationship they have–they’re best friends, they bicker and fight and make up all the time. They live based on Donghyuck love-bombing Mark and Mark denying the affection all the time. But they love each other in a brotherly way, it has always been like that.

It’s not like you expected Donghyuck to want to hug and kiss you and only you after what happened last night, but you kind of did expect it.

Were you jealous of Donghyuck’s best friend, your own brother Mark?

Donghyuck looks at you confused when you don't accept his hug right away. You stop his arms midway, and his eyes look defeated, full of worry. “Did something happen?”

You deny with your head. “I don’t know, that kind of felt weird,” you confess to him.

Donghyuck caresses your arms, feeling you relax from the defensive attitude from before, until he gets your hands together. “What felt weird?”

It’s ridiculous, you know it is and you’re embarrassed about what you’re about to say. Yet, you can’t help but:

“I think I got jealous,” you say and watch his brows furrowed together. “You know, when you were trying to kiss Mark…”

Donghyuck only bursts out laughing and hugs you tightly against his chest, leaving you no time to escape the sudden affection. He smells like fabric softener and feels comfortable like a pillow. And you hate that you love the way his laugh resonates through your entire body when he presses you to himself like that.

“You know I never want to kiss Mark seriously, right? That I only do it ‘cause I know he hates it,” he explains once he’s separated from you, still holding your hands in his and looking you in the eyes. “I don’t want to kiss anyone the way I want to kiss you.”

You look down hiding your smile, thinking he’s cute at first and processing his words then, which makes you laugh a little. Donghyuck realizes right away and starts to laugh too, leaving the seriousness behind.

“Was that too much?” He asks.

You nod in response. “But it’s good to know.”

“Good,” he says before planting a kiss on your cheek. He’s only millimeters away from your face when he speaks again. “No need to be jealous then.”

Donghyuck turns you around on the chair, so your back is pressing against the island and he can stand comfortably between your legs. He starts as he did last night, planting a kiss on your knuckles, then your wrist, but you don’t wanna waste any more time so you free yourself from his hands and start cradling his face. His lips look as tempting as always, maybe even more after you tasted them for the first time.

He notices your look so he gives you a lopsided, attractive smile that you desperately wanna rip off his face.

“How can you look this handsome in the morning?” You ask, admiring all his features.

“I mean, technically it’s past the morning.” he answers in a cocky tone.

“Shut up already.”

You don’t give him time to fight back as you’re sealing his lips with a kiss. It’s slow but deep, and his skin feels warm and soft under your fingertips, all the way from his sharp jaw to his cheekbones. When he bites your lip a little bit to get full access to your mouth, you worry about the breakfast you were having minutes ago, but Donghyuck doesn’t seem to mind:

“Mhmm,” he hums, breaking apart and licking his lips. “You taste like maple syrup.” And he steals another quick kiss from you.

“Yeah,” you say as you turn around to face the kitchen island again. “‘Cause you interrupted my breakfast.”

But despite you showing your back to him and trying to finish your food, Donghyuck won’t let you eat in peace. “Oh yeah,” he murmurs against the skin of your neck after he moves your hair to your left shoulder. He plants a soft kiss on your right side, sending shivers down your spine and making it hard to concentrate on your task. “I’m sooo sorry I interrupted you.” His tone is full of sarcasm as his kisses travel to your jaw and all the way down again. “And you hated it sooo much.”

The metallic sound of your fork falling off your hand and hitting the plate startles the both of you. Donghyuck stops sucking on your neck and you fall out of your trance. Your startled face might be somewhat funny, because Donghyuck starts giggling as you both realize you were enjoying his kisses a little too much.

“Let’s go on a date.”

“All of a sudden?”

He nods with a smile on his face. “It’s your last day here tomorrow. It’s not like we won’t see each other anymore but… I want to take you out before your last day here.”

“Okay,” you agree, matching his smile.

“Okay?” He asks once more and sighs contentedly when you nod your head yes. “I’ll go plan everything. Make sure you’re all mine this afternoon!” And he leaves the room after kissing your right cheek.

(The busiest) Monday, 07:37 p.m.

“Hyuck, come on, there’s seriously no way of winning with those machines.”

“Babe, just one more try. I wanna get something for you.”

Donghyuck has been fighting against a claw machine for what felt like half an hour now. Since none of you weren’t able to win any of the games you tried at the carnival, you really appreciate his determination to win a prize for you this way. Yet you arrived here at five p.m., and after two rounds of bumper cars, after testing your strength at Ring the Bell (and both of you failing embarrassingly), riding the teacups, getting scared to death in the haunted house, and going twice into the Ferris wheel (one time for the sightseeing and pics and another time for kissing at the top of it) your stomach growls with hunger.

“We could’ve paid dinner with all the money you spent on this machine-”

“Wait, I’m about to get it!”

“Let’s just go get dinner.”

“But I’m about to get it!”

And you see it forreal this time: the claw holding a big Pochacco plushie and it falling right into the hole.

“Hyuck, you got it!” You scream in disbelief, a big smile taking over your face (maybe because of the cute plushie or maybe because it meant you were finally going to have some food.)

You watch Donghyuck lose his arm through the hatch and get it back, this time with the stuffed animal in his hand. When he’s presenting it in front of you, the stuffed animal is so big that it blocks your view. You admire it for a second, and then take it into your arms to discover a Donghyuck wearing the biggest smile you've seen in a while. He’s all cozied up, his jacket and stuffed hat making him look like a real life teddy bear. Even so, the cold of the winter has caused the tip of his nose and his cheeks to turn red, somehow making him look even cuter.

“I got it for you!” He says, the excitement not leaving his body even for a second.

You can’t contain yourself and, as an impulse, grab him from the jacket with your free hand and pull forward until your lips are meeting his. Just a short peck as a way of saying thank you, I love it (you.)

Neither of you realizes the little crowd you've drawn around the machines, not until you hear the applause and cheering as you're breaking away from your kiss. You’ve never seen Donghyuck get shy when drawing people’s attention, so this might be your first time noticing him trying to hide under his hat and into your embrace. You laugh it off even when you're equally embarrassed, but thank him for the plushie and tell him to run away from there to get dinner.

—

“I think I’ve liked you from the start,” Donghyuck confesses all of a sudden.

Well, maybe not so all of a sudden. While you two were having your dinner, bottle of beer came after bottle of beer. At some point of the night, you thought it was a good idea to start having soju. Donghyuck said something like “it’s our last night together, we should celebrate and get wasted” to justify your decision. So it may be the full stomachs and the alcohol making you be honest with each other.

“I know I’ve liked you from the start.”

“Aaall the guys knew too…” He slurs his words a little when speaking. “I wouldn't shut up about you.”

You can't hide your drunken, enamored smile when hearing him. But something makes a little noise inside your head. “All the guys knew?” You ask and he nods quickly. “Even Mark?”

“Even Mark,” Donghyuck confirms. “I mean, we always kind of had this joke going around that I was always waiting for you.” He pours himself another drink. “But we both knew it wasn't a joke.”

“Oh god.” You cover your face, embarrassed. “My own brother lied to me,” you say and Donghyuck makes a confused sound, which makes you keep explaining. “He pretended to know nothing about your feelings when I confessed to him that I liked you.”

“I asked him not to say anything.”

“Huh?”

“I wanted to tell you myself how much I like you.”

“Oh god,” it's all you can repeat right now, all these confessions and the alcohol making you grow hot everywhere. “It's so hot inside this restaurant,” you say as you take your jacket off.

Donghyuck knows the red on your cheeks isn't only because of the heat inside the place.

“I like you sooo much,” he says as he watches you giggle out of nervousness. Donghyuck calls your name and holds your hand over the table to try to get you to look at him, but you only giggle and hide your face with your other hand. “I'm in love with you!” 

“Okay, okay!” You're laughing by now, trying to cover his mouth to shut him up and not attract everyone's attention like you did at the carnival. “I'm in love with you too!”

“Good,” he says with an extremely pleased smile, that one that has always attracted you to him so much.

“Good?” you repeat and he nods.

Your phone screen lights up showing it's Mark calling you. You silently tell Donghyuck you're picking up and he lets go of your hand for you to do so.

“Yes?”

“Yo,” you hear Mark answer from the other side. “We're at Yuta's right now, we're working on some music with Taeil and TY so I think I'm just gonna crash here tonight.”

“Uhm, are you sure you don't wanna go back?” You ask and make eye contact with Donghyuck, who narrows his eyes and tilts his head to the side after your question. You only shrug to him as a response.

“Nah, I'll leave the apartment for the two of you so make good use of it.” Your brother answers convincingly.

“Okay, I'll see you in the morning.”

“All right bet, see you in the morning.” And he's quick to hang up.

You take the phone off your ear and look at it confused for a bit, until Donghyuck breaks the silence. “Everything all right with Mark?”

“Yeah,” you say as you put the phone down. “He said he's not going back home tonight.”

“Oh.”

You think of the words your brother said. “Leaving the apartment for the two of you,” and “making good use of it,” and it hits you. A little bit late, but it hits you.

“Oh…” you repeat, a surprised expression now taking over your face.

“Yeah, oh!” Donghyuck agrees. “We're having a real sleepover tonight!”

But by the excitement in Donghyuck's face, the one a little kid would show when told he's sleeping at a friend's, you aren't convinced he thought the same way you and Mark did.

(The last day at your brother's) Tuesday, 09:12 a.m.

The next morning, you wake up pretty confused. When you open your eyes, you're not sleeping at your usual spot. Your surroundings look very different from the living room where you've been sleeping every night. To your right, you spot Donghyuck's desk, filled with physics books, a pile of comics, and the typical empty Red Bull cans. The mattress also feels incredibly comfortable, soft but firm under you. But the most strange thing is the weight over your body, and a cologne you know very well and like very much flooding your senses. That's when you realize Donghyuck is laying all over you, stretched like a starfish.

You laugh and struggle to take your arms under him, and when you wrap them around the boy over you and squeeze, he starts to laugh too.

"Are the curtains open?" You ask in a voice still full of sleep.

He moves his head up to catch the smile on your face. "No?" 

"Then why is the sun so bright in my face?"

The smile spreads on his face and he plants a chaste kiss on your lips. "You're so fucking cheesy." And he kisses you again.

“Get off,” you try to move him from over your face and your body. “I haven’t washed my mouth.”

“I don’t care,” he says, finally moving and sitting at the side of his bed, where you’re still laying in. “I’m not missing a chance to kiss you.”

“You’re sooo fucking cheesy,” you repeat his words.

“And you like me sooo much.” Donghyuck moves to the nightstand and grabs an aspirin and a can of Red Bull and brings them to your mouth. “Take, it’ll make you feel better after all we had last night.”

You sit up a little on the bed to do what he told you, and once you've swallowed the aspirin you let yourself fall back against his pillow. Donghyuck is still sitting on the edge of the bed, exchanging glances with you and holding your hand lovingly. He's wearing the Michael Jackson t-shirt that he likes so much and he's wearing his messy hair, just as you left it after pulling, fixing and messing it up while you kissed him countless times the night before.

You’re leaving today, and it’s like all the feelings you’ve accumulated these past years are hitting right now, all at once.

“I wish I could wake up like this everyday.”

“Hungover?”

“No, not hungover,” you laugh at his question. “With you.”

He smiles and squeezes your hand reassuringly. “We’ll figure it out.”

You sit up in the bed and search for the energy drink on the nightstand. After a few drinks, you’ve figured the morning breath can’t be so bad, so you move to face him properly and grab his face for a real kiss. Donghyuck doesn’t take long to reciprocate and start caressing your entire body. He’s always the first one to take the kisses to other places, so you take the lead this time. You discovered last night that Donghyuck can’t resist the kisses on his neck. You start placing soft kisses, then some licks until you suck a little and he fails to suppress a moan. He laughs it off and calls your name.

“I want to ask something important,” he says, looking you dead-serious in the eyes now, all the jokes and the desire aside. After you nod in response, telling he has your attention, he takes a big breath of courage. “It may seem a little rushed, but after all we’ve shared these years and after this week we’ve spent together, I don’t want you to leave without asking you to go out with me.”

You feel the temperature increase throughout your skin. Is he finally asking you to…

“Be my girlfriend?” As if he knew you from inside and out, he finishes your thoughts out loud.

Temperature reaches your face as well as probably the biggest smile you’ve worn since you got here. You cradle his face, squeeze his cheeks with your hands until a pout is showing and you can’t help but laugh—out of nervousness but also out of happiness, from having the sun in your hands and all for yourself.

“Lee Donghyuck,” you start. “That’d make me the happiest in the world, in the universe.”

“You’re sooo cheesy!” He starts the bickering once again, yet he’s sealing your deal with a kiss on your smile and, of course, you’re returning the affection.

(Later that) Tuesday, 03:30 p.m.

You’re standing in the building’s hallway while your brother struggles to lock the door to the 12-7 apartment. Donghyuck is patiently holding your suitcase, waiting for Mark to be done. They’re going to accompany you to the bus stop that’s coming at four p.m. so you can finally go home to the rest of your family and your normal life—you’ll be back studying and working in a few days, after spending Christmas with the family and Donghyuck, who promised to be there to join the Christmas lunch at your home and—maybe, if he doesn’t chicken out—present himself as your boyfriend to your parents.

“We need to change the door lock before y/n moves in here,” Mark says after finally locking it.

“What?” Donghyuck and you ask in unison. “Moving here?”

“You’re not moving in with Donghyuck? I thought I’d finally be free from him,” your brother answers, kind of disappointed, but not as disappointed as Donghyuck after noticing how bad your brother wants him out.

“But where will you go?” You ask him.

“I made plans to share the floor with Yuta.” 

“That motherfucking japanese!” Donghyuck screams following Mark down the hallway, and you palm his back trying to reassure him, but your boyfriend won’t calm down. “I swear he wants to steal my best friend from me! He’s so jealous of my life!”

“What would he be jealous of, Donghyuck?” Your brother asks tiredly, and you know he’s rolling his eyes even if all you see is his back opening the building’s front door.

“Of our last-longing, incredibly unique friendship, of-fucking-course!” Donghyuck answers like it’s obvious.

“I’m pretty sure you just kept this friendship to get with my sister.”

“Mark?! That’s not true. I love you, man. Mark-Mark, come on!”

------------------------------------------------------------

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With constant hits and popularity rising to you and Donghyuck, Donghyuck comes three times a week; Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday, giving you enough time to spend with Chenle and also practice what you’ve learnt. Despite Chenle finishing in two minutes, you note that your foreplay life with him has evolved into something beautiful and you can tell that it’s something highly anticipated by the both of you.

There seems to be a spark that has lit up inside of you as well as Chenle. It seems that watching Sexy Sun please his new girl (you), has put Chenle in some sort of mode to always follow. Meaning, whatever Donghyuck did to you, Chenle would try it out.

Which also means that you’ve started anticipating Donghyuck’s every move. Although you’re still tense in some moments, he surely makes you feel calm when inserting his fingers inside of you, or staring so deep into your eyes with praises of how well you’re doing, and at times doing after care services with you making sure you’re cleaned up before he goes. Most of the times it worries you that Chenle can’t smell the scent of cigarettes around your room or he doesn’t notice the background that is similar to Sexy Sun, he doesn’t even realize that the vibrators you use are the same ones that Donghyuck uses in his live.

Other than that, days and weeks have passed and you’re feeling that the days are closing in on Donghyuck finally inserting himself inside of you. He used the vibrators to stretch you open, and now it’s time for him to start using the dildo’s to make it easier for you to accept his length in you, he even mentioned how he’d like to try and eat you out one day. And then finally he’ll put his actual dick inside of you. Donghyuck really has a gift and knows how to capture the audience attention as well as yours. Every night when he comes over his audience is never disappointed and they pay large amounts of money just seeing you being pleasured. He's really good at pleasing you and he's been keeping the tips up high- and every time he offers to pay you, you refuse and ask him to pay you with lessons.

And boy have the lessons been the best thing you’ve ever learnt in your entire life. How to please your boyfriend. Most of the times, Donghyuck jokes that these are things he wishes girls would do for him, but other than that he’s really gentle when teaching you all these tricks that he knows.

It kills you how one day you’ll have to stop seeing him.

Your main mission is pleasing Chenle, and if Chenle is pleased then it means you’d no longer need to give Donghyuck your service. But just as much as you’re using him, he’s also using you and you must admit that he makes a lot of money from kink factory. When he offers to pay you some of the amount, you always tell him to keep it because he deserves it more. And as days progress, you realize just how intelligent Donghyuck is. Aside from being a good teacher, Donghyuck excels in his studies. He could’ve been a nerd like you and Chenle but somehow he found himself part of the cool nerds. But they don’t call themselves nerds.

And by spending a few minutes with Donghyuck, you’ve sort of gotten to know his friends. They all tease how they want to enter in you, and every time you look uncomfortable, Donghyuck takes you away to tell you the next steps and so on. But none the less, you’ve gotten to know that they are nerds…just the cool kind. Renjun is in business marketing, Jaemin is in human resources management, Mark is in talent specialist acquisition training, Jeno studies cyber law, Donghyuck does computer robotics engineering and Jaehyun is in civil engineering. A smart duo but they all have their heads in the wrong places, especially when it comes to their future and what they’ll do.

All you can wonder now is if Donghyuck finally puts himself inside of you…will you still need him to teach you, or would you finally call it off? Because all you wanna do is please Chenle, and if you figure out how to get down to the problem…you might not need for Donghyuck to teach you.

Feeling troubled by your thoughts you decide that you'll voice it out with Donghyuck the next time you see him. Going to the canteen and up the flight of stairs, you nervously approach the table in which Donghyuck is always seated at with his friends. Instead of seeing him, you see all his other friends except him.

Upon not seeing him, you back slide and make your way out. Half way through– you almost bump into Chenle. Your eyes widen slightly for a second when seeing him. "Baby? What are you doing here?”

Chenle’s smile is warm when he embraces you in a hug and points to Jisung (one of his classmates). “Jisung wanted to show me something, are you headed to the lunch break spot now?”

“Uhm yeah,” You nod your head with a little smile. Despite the times you spend around Donghyuck, Chenle shouldn’t ever know what you did behind his back.

“I’ll come later on,” He notes. “I won’t be too long,”

“Okay,”

Parting ways yet again, you’re walking outside of the canteen still looking for Donghyuck, hoping that some way you can see him or spot his all too familiar leather jacket or cloud of smoke that sometimes surrounds him. Sending him a message on Kink Factory that you need to talk to him, you’re bummed when he doesn’t see the message immediately. Unfortunately, you can’t find him after your search and just decide to go and sit down. It’s in going to your usual spot by the steps do you already notice Chenle. From far he looks deep in thought and when you draw near to him, his eyes go up to yours with so much shock.

“What’s wrong baby?” You ask him taking a seat next to him and putting your hand on his shoulder.

“N-nothing. I was just thinking,” He mutters and removes his glasses and rubbing his eyes before he pulls them back on his face. “I need to get new eye glasses.”

You hum out and bring out your own food. Nothing is unusual, however the silence that soon follows makes you feel odd. You peek at him and he has his eyes glued to his pants, but this time he looks disheartened. “Babe?”

“Hm?” He snaps out of his daze. “Do I really not know how to please you?”

“Pardon?”

“Jisung was telling me that statistically speaking 4 out of 5 women pretend to be satisfied in bed and aren’t really enjoying the sex they have with their partner.” He lets out and worriedly looks between your eyes. “So I just wanna know, am I not good in bed? Do you pretend to enjoy it?”

Your hands land on his cheeks gently as you look at him deeply in his eyes. “Babe, why would you even think that? You think us having sex hasn’t been good lately? Don’t mind the statistics, and don’t be down casted. I’ve really been enjoying myself when we’re together in the room, when we’re trying new things and even when we make love. We’ve been together for a really long time and have explored together, so of course everything is perfect. What makes you think you’re not good in bed? Was it because of Jisung? And why would you guys even be discussing that?”

Chenle looks between your eyes and gets the slight sense of your earnest remark. A month ago you were too shy to even talk publicly about sex. But it’s like a new aura around you has you feeling confident. And if honest, Chenle feels almost pleased that he looks like he's doing a good job in satisfying you. But he can't help thinking what he's thinking after everything Jisung told him. "Jisung is a philosophy student, so he was just reading to me his essay and I felt attacked by it."

"Well don't," You pat his cheek. "You have noting to worry about. In fact, I'd even say that our sex life has improved tremendously, wouldn't you say so as well?"

You expect Chenle to answer in a heartbeat, but when he takes his time you wonder if he still has doubts. Okay maybe ending it with Donghyuck right now isn't a good idea - you need to make sure that Chenle as well feels confident in himself.

Your phone buzzes alerting you of Donghyuck's message in Kink Factory. "Oh I guess I have to go. See you?"

Chenle nods his head as you both kiss each others cheeks before you depart from him. Following Donghyuck's message whereby he tells you that he's in the robotics campus, you surely walk around using the school's safety map (located on section parts of the campus). Upon finding the pole with the label of Robotics, you carefully tread on unknown grounds. Thankfully you don't have to tread far as you spot Donghyuck on one of the buildings smoking by the terrace.

Hurrying in the building to not delay and waste time- you're halted in your tracks when hearing Donghyuck cuss out. "Fuck, I can't keep paying for all your debt mum. I also- mum- hold on what? Do you know how hard it is for me? I haven't paid my own fucking rent in 2 months, I'm living off of dry noodles because I can't even afford to buy my own water, I don’t even eat every single- what? - hold on- wait- mum- mum I fucking even barely have enough to pay for my textbooks- it's a fucking miracle I'm still on scholarship- what do you mean who cares about me? - Mum I'm a fucking male prostitute for crying out loud! Do you know what they call me? A gigolo. Do you know how fucking embarrassing it is to apply for a job and the first thing they see when searching me up is my dick down a throat of an old lady? Do you-"

Donghyuck's irritation causes his voice to grow louder, fairly bitter and tightly in irritation causing you to quickly hide behind the wall to avoid being seen by him. You contemplate leaving…seeing as you came during a bad time, however hearing him pour out his heart has you feeling somewhat nosy and intrigued…you also feel bad.

"I have to! Fuck. I can't believe you're actually fucking talking right now. You're the one who's supposed to look after me- not me always taking care of you. When have I ever gotten the chance to be a child- you always fucked things up- why do I- that's the point you- so fucking disown me already!"

You don't hear anything for a couple of minutes, and right before you decide to reveal yourself (in the most natural and 'non ease dropping manner') you hear an incredibly loud bang and you jerk by the harsh tone of Donghyuck's voice. "Fuck!" The banging happens a couple more times and you think that he’s probably beating something.

Waiting a few more minutes you're not expecting to hear a silent hiss, and then ultimately a sniff. It's at this point whereby you wonder whether you should leave or just enter… leaving seems to be the only option however your heart…hurts.

As you’re going down the stairs and leaving the Robotics building, a thought pops up in your head. It only takes a few steps away from the exit of the building before you race back to the building, climbing up the stairs again and briskly walking into the classroom. You're not surprised that the classroom is empty- otherwise he wasn't going to have that conversation so audibly- however you are surprised that he’s really alone. Why is there no one in this building? Aside from the few students outside, no one is inside. Walking in the class silently, you see him hunched over a desk with his whole head down.

As you get closer to him your eyes enlarge when taking notice of his bloody hand. He’s just staring at it! In alarm you quickly move towards him and place your bag on the desk while bringing out some soft wipes from your bag.

Donghyuck’s focus snaps back to reality when seeing your frail figure bring out some soft wipes and a bottle of water. He clears his throat, running his hand through his hair and wiping his eyes- however he’s quickly alert when noticing his hand is bloody and he feels pain over his knuckles that are cut deeply. “Shit.” He mumbles.

“It’s okay let me do it,” You timidly assure as you take a hold of his hand and start placing the wet wipes on the wounds of his knuckles which are bruised severely. So that’s where the sound came from. He was punching his hand. Just as you try to focus on healing the wound, Donghyuck takes a seat on the stool and tries to clear his head from the conversation he had with his mother. “What happened? How’d you get this wound and cut?”

That seems to do the trick as Donghyuck completely shuts down and pulls his hand away from yours. He digs into his school bag that’s nearby and takes out a pack of cigarettes. “Don’t worry about me. I’m good. So um," Donghyuck rubs the back of his neck, not minding that the blood is still pouring. Your eyes remain enlarged but you don’t try to help. He looks incredibly low and you’re not sure if he’s the violent type or not, so you try not to dwell in that situation. "I was hoping that… I know we still have some toys left, but I really wanted to have sex with you. It could bring in a lot of money...a huge amount of money. I know it feels rushed, but with proper marketing I know that we'll get a lot of money, but what do you think?”

He doesn’t even look at you when saying this, and it’s almost as if he’s ashamed of himself. After hearing the conversation, your mind is quick to piece his words together. He wants money.

“I know it’s a lot to ask…” Donghyuck breathes out still not looking at you. It must be a lot for him too, since he barely lights up his cigarette and his eyes are staring at his bloody hand.

“Wait, I actually had a proposal,” You promptly state. “Do you mind coming with me right now to my dorm?"

"Sure." He agrees in an instant and picks up his bag before stuffing some electronic components inside.

-

Upon getting inside your room, you make him acquainted with the kitchen as your briefly prepare a small meal. Donghyuck hadn't said anything the whole way while walking as his attention was on the ground (and you can only assume it's because of the conversation he had with his mother), so you're actually surprised when he speaks up. "What are you doing?"

Especially when you dish up for him some food and hand it over to him on the counter. He looks confused and you pay him no mind when taking a seat on the high stool next to him and bringing out a notepad. "I wanted to treat you to a meal and tell you something,"

Donghyuck looks nonchalant towards the food but deep down he's starving and his stomach is growling. He puts on an act of not really being hungry, but you urge him to eat.

"Please eat, seeing your bruised hand and drained face, I want you to have energy,"

Donghyuck breathes in before picking up the chopsticks. You quickly go into your washroom and bring out your first aid kit. You place it to the side as you watch him eating wholeheartedly with his mouth full. He's slurping down on the instant noodles but when you enter the room - he's quick in keeping a simple pace.

Before you can think about it, you’re reminded of how most of the times when Donghyuck would leave your house after each session, some of your left overs would be gone, or other times your fridge stock would be missing. You never assumed much of it because on a daily when Chenle would be over, he'd raid your fridge and take things out either when he would cook or when he wanted to snack. To think that Donghyuck could also have been lurking through each shelf in your kitchen makes you saddened. The poor guy had troubles that were unknown to the naked eye. After hearing the conversation with his mum, his parent who was supposed to be a parent, you heart actually broke at the type of dynamic they had. Donghyuck had taken the parental role while his mother had assumed child position.

Sitting down next to Donghyuck and watching him eat makes you feel at ease and you clear your throat. "While you eat I'm just gonna talk. So I was thinking, well I had a chat with my boyfriend and he looked down and a bit insecure that he didn't know how to please me. I know that our lessons are based on me trying to please him, but I wanted to ask you, what could make him feel less insecure when pleasing me?"

Donghyuck tries to hurry in swallowing his food yet you quickly stop him.

"Wait no, I've got more questions. So, based on you wanting us to have sex because it'll bring in more money, I was thinking of an idea,"

"What is it?" He asks with his mouth full.

You place your pen down and sit side ways so that you're facing him. "My boyfriend was watching an anime the other day and I saw this character that was cute and small and all the guys loved her."

"So cosplay?"

"Uhm,"

Donghyuck picks up a piece of smoked staked meat and dips it in some sauce. "Say ah," You open your mouth and say 'ah' and Donghyuck bites his lip. "You know babygirl, you've got such an attractive mouth. If we had to do cosplay, your mouth and body would be perfect. Can you say 'oppa' in a cute way?"

"Oppa~"

"Fuck, that's hot," Donghyuck chuckles and finds you another meat. He nods his head and hums out. "By the way, the food is delicious,"

"Thank you," You smile. "So what do you think?"

"I like the concept of cosplaying, and a mukbang, but I still think sex could bring us a lot of money,"

You close your lips and tilt it to one side. "Don't you want to test out the dildos and other toys on me first?"

Donghyuck doesn't need to prompt more out of you when seeing your nervous face. He too knows that you're not ready and forcing you into something that makes you uncomfortable will make the viewers all the more reluctant to watch it. Of course there would be those hardcore 'rape her' comments that pop here and there but after reconciling with you that day- he began respecting your boundary a bit more.

You were a fragile girl with a body that still needed to learn.

However, he needed money ASAP.

"How about this?" Donghyuck's ears are perked when hearing another proposal from you. "It seems like you need money and I-"

"No." Donghyuck can already see where you're headed and wholeheartedly refuses. There was nothing more degrading for him then being offered money from somebody. It always felt like pity cash. And he didn't want to be pitied. Better die in debt then have everyone knowing he was strapped in debt. Besides he has been with you for a long time to know that you're actually a very giving friend.

"Sorry, I didn't mean it in a bad way." You meekly say. "I meant that we could film more content on days as well as nights, that way your ratings and views can go up and then also people can tip more."

Donghyuck considers the idea and hums before nodding his head. "Day content sounds good. Could we try one now?"

"N-now?" Your eyes pop and you hold onto your seat.

Donghyuck nods his head, eating the last bowl of food while he stands up and walks to your room. You follow behind him like a puppy and tie your hair back when Donghyuck takes a look at you. As always he's always prepared with a mask and gives it to you. You put it around your mouth and wait for Donghyuck's next approach. He gets out his phone going onto camera.

Starting the recording he approaches you with his phone in his hand and with the other hand he palms your breast softly and slowly almost kneading it like dough. Your tits react and he dips his hand inside your shirt pulling the material down and pulling out your breast from it's bra placement. Your pink nipple has him feeling aroused by how perky it becomes. "Wouldn't you want to pierce these lovely beauties?"

By his comment, ideas pop in his head for a new type of content.

"Babygirl, how familiar are you with BDSM?"

-

[Sexy Sun Live...]

During the night, you're a moaning mess when Donghyuck applies the pressure on the nipple tweezers over your boobs by pulling on them.

"Damn, you've got such nice tits," You're laying flat on the bed trying to breathe over the mask covering your face. But it's so hard to breathe when every breath that leaves your mouth is a gasp of arousal and it only makes the space around your mouth feel hot. Your body is in heaps of sweat and with your continuous soft breaths Donghyuck is easily turned on by your exotic sweaty but cute form.

Donghyuck despite not liking bondages kink, finds himself taking a liking in pleasing your body, reason being because he loves your eyes. His eyes are stuck on yours. With every blink you do they're rolling in pleasure and sleekly making you look high. He's watched Hentai before and never thought any human girl could replicate the lust intoxication look without cosplay makeup, yet here you are looking dizzy and drunk with pleasure and he can't stop looking. If he could he would've masturbated to your sight.

"Fuck, you look hot,"

Donghyuck has the camera in an angle that's diagonal to the bed. Meaning the viewers can see your body spread out on the bed with him holding one leg over his shoulder to allow for better viewing on your whole body. While one hand pulls on the nipple tweezers over your boobs, his other hand is playing with the tail butt plug on your anus. There's a weird pain sensation that spreads across your body. By the amount of pain over your boobs, you're surprised that it turns you on when Donghyuck pulls on it and plays with your tits. And while there's a literal clog being plugged on your booty hole your surprised that as Donghyuck Wiggles and pulls on the tail do you feel oddly good. He then moves over to your holes and applies pressure over your pussy - and that alone makes your anus (that's plugged with the butt plug) feel hot and you just want to rub it to add onto the oddly weird pain sensation.

When suggesting cosplay to Donghyuck you didn't think that he'd try it the first night. You've got new toys such as a butt plug designed in a hairy tail for some kind of pink fox, you've got matching pink fox ears and a fox mask.

Your hands are in a knot above your head and Donghyuck likes how you look when you can barely hold still. The whole room smells like sex; sweat, semen, sweat cream and perfume. "Can I kiss you?"

Your eyes enlarge but it doesn't stop Donghyuck from pulling your mask down your chin and planting his lips over yours. His tongue slides into your mouth and you engage with his as you slide over his tongue making out. It's a sloppy kiss that's full of smooches and distracts you from Donghyuck's sneaky fingers that slides your leg off his shoulder and uses his other hand to rub your wet holes while the other holds onto a dildo.

As you and Donghyuck discussed, Donghyuck prepares your holes by playing with a squishy dildo over your slippery slope. You're shivering when Donghyuck enters just the tip, and this reminds you of Chenle and his kink for only adding his tip. According to Donghyuck, your boyfriend gets off to just a tip kink and that's a normal and common thing for guys.

However recalling Donghyuck's words only increases your anxiety levels - especially when he pushes the enlarged dildo into your heated core, which is already stretching wide to accomodate the length. Your hefty moan turns into screeches of pleasure making Donghyuck smile inbetween the kiss. Breaking free from the kiss, Donghyuck gets a hold of your legs that seize to close- he holds onto your juicy thigh and instantly pulls out the dildo as you groan out in ecstasy making him laugh. "You're already dick hungry and this isn't even a real dick,"

Donghyuck turns you around on the bed and prompts your butt up. Instead of your butt facing the camera, Donghyuck has your face in direct view of the camera, so together with your mask, you look innocent and so ready for the dick.

"This position is better when getting that dick," Donghyuck says and his eyes focus lustfully on the toy that gets engulfed and swamped into your glory hole. Your loud moan and eyes rolling around don't go unnoticed by all the thousands of viewers watching the cam.

The moment Donghyuck begins moving the rubber toy in and out of your pussy at a pace that you've never experienced - you lose all control of your body and all the gestures it makes. If not for the mask everyone would've seen just how dick-struck you are. You're drooling and you're tongue is out. Donghyuck slaps on your butt and you feel like you can levitate. You can't take it and even though it's still early to cum, you do. But that doesn't stop Donghyuck from going on. In fact with the tweezers over your boobs you still feel high and horny.

Donghyuck out of nowhere takes it out, and slides his head underneath your body. "Shit. Sit up babygirl,"

Your body is trembling and you're still trying to catch your breath when breathing out loud like a dog panting. Snapping back to reality you look down and see Donghyuck right over your pussy.

"Sit on my face,"

You have no time to process his command when his hands wrap around your thighs and he pulls you down to his face. This is something you've never felt before; his nose, his tongue- his face! At this point you're a Hentai character who squeals repeatedly like a child and are in heat. Your toes are curling at every sucking and tongue flicker from Donghyuck. His whole mouth eats you out and you are sure that you can see the stars from how far your eyes have rolled back and you can see the open curtains with the gobsmacking view.

Unaware, you're riding Donghyuck's face just as much as he's eating you out. Jaehyun was right when he said you tasted like a pineapple. You're so sweet and sour that it's mouth watering for Donghyuck, he can't stop sucking you and slurping on your juices. You lose your mind when he he shakes his head and his warm tongue rizzes up your lower half.

"Donghyuck!" You yelp out in wild ecstasy.

While the camera stops recoding as the song ends, Donghyuck doesn't stop pleasing you. And even if you hear the song over and you pick your eyes open to see the camera red recoding light off, you don't stop him. You're both so lost in the pleasure that it takes Donghyuck's phone ringing to snap you out of it. While you're a mess, Donghyuck laughs when he lays you on the bed and begins to undo your ropes and removes your mask. You can barely look at him as your eyes are still trying to adjust.

Donghyuck smiles and pats your cheeks of your worn out face. "You did good babygirl,"

You're too tired to move, so you just lay there like you're dead. Donghyuck performs aftercare services for you and cleans you up, and at the same time cleans up your room too. And throughout the process he's talking about how you're ready for him but you'd still need more practice at taking in dick.

"Speaking of which, can you ride?"

"Ride what?" You enquire.

"Dick," Donghyuck comes back with your granny panty and a shirt. "Can you ride dick?"

You shake your head and sit up to put on the shirt and underwear while removing the fox ears. "I've never done that,"

"Wow, your boyfriend has done you dirty," He sits on your bed and watches you drop to the side while looking at him. "You're basically telling me your boyfriend has never given you control. How're you feeling now? Think you can move?"

"I'm tired,"

Donghyuck smirks but still lays next to you. "Get on me,"

"Donghyuck-"

"Come on babygirl, you did so good, I wanna teach you something," His side gaze over your face has you sighing out before you drape your leg over him and get up to properly align yourself on him. Donghyuck shifts your body lower so that you're sitting on his dick. "Now, I want you to ride me as best as you can,"

"Ride?"

"Like you're riding a horse,"

"Okay," With a little help Donghyuck bucks your hips forward and you get the gist of it by sliding over him. Your eyes enlarge greatly when feeling a heavy force grow.

"Fuck, that's a boner. Keep going," You do as told and from your view up wards, seeing Donghyuck with his eye shut and head back you feel a bit confident to try something. Which is to go a bit faster and allow yourself to move your own hips. "Shit, that's it, keep going,"

And you keep going by circling your waist and trying to find out what feels more good. When you lean back stretching your arms to hold onto his legs behind you, it drives him crazy as his chest begins to rise and fall, meanwhile leaning forward with your hands on his shoulders has him bucking his hips up and down and he's telling you not to stop. Feeling his boner and dry humping him is a new experience that has you enjoying each and every second. Your horny pussy gets wet while Donghyuck's thrusts up into you has you both making eye contact and looking at each other deeply while he shows you how to ride. It comes to a point where Donghyuck has to grip your hips to stop you from going on as he can't handle the erection and burst if excitement.

You smile proudly having achieved his praise, yet you don't get off him. "Hey Donghyuck,"

"Yeah," Donghyuck pats your thigh and runs his hand over them.

"I've just come to realise that you're incredibly smart," You allow your hands to play with the ends of his shirt. "So why is it that you do this,"

You don't even have to go deep in explanation for Donghyuck to understand you. He contemplates in his head of whether to open up to you or not. The decision comes to a conclusion when he sees how vulnerable you are… Or it could be how pussy drunk he is and feeling your covered pussy over his dick makes him soft. "I…" It's shameful to say especially when looking at you, but looking into your eyes has him opening up. "You know babygirl, I'm broke. And being broke, will drive you into doing crazy things, hence my secret kinky life at kink Factory,"

You nod your head listening to him. Seeing how he reacted to your pity sympathy character, you try a different approach. "Would you still reject my money if I think you genuinely deserved it? For pleasing me and making me feel good?"

"My pride would go down." Donghyuck admits.

"There's nothing wrong with a male asking for money. I mean, if you can do it to a bunch of strangers online at kink Factory, why can't I spoil you?" You shrug your shoulders looking deep into his eyes. "I wanna spoil you,"

Donghyuck smirks at your comment. "It's different. I can take advantage of people online. I can't do that to you, you're… too innocent."

Your eyes widen in shock. Is he seriously talking about 'innocence'? "What are you even saying?"

He laughs lightly looking at your thighs. He makes an effort to sit up and you immediately try to get off him, but he holds you straight in one position. He sits up and drags his body back against the headboard before gripping your thighs and pulling you back on top of him so that you're straddling him.

You're even looking into his eyes, as he does the same with you. "I'm saying that I'd rather do this dirty thing with someone else."

"Oh." Well you guess there was always some truth to what Donghyuck said. "You won't do it with me because I'm innocent?"

"And kind. You're thoughtful too." Donghyuck meekly smiles. "You know, I was actually in a bad headspace this afternoon when you came to see me. I was about to have sex with you for money. Literally. But then, when you proposed your idea, I thought about you for a bit. You seemed like the kindest person I had ever met in a while and, well, after you cooked for me I fell in love,"

You laugh at this comment causing him to chuckle. The way his voice drops is so soft and sincere and, if anyone was to hear him speak this way they'd think he was your boyfriend. "Tell you what, exam period is about to start, if you like, you can come over and I'll cook for you. You could even study here if you want,"

"And your boyfriend?" Donghyuck doesn't know why it's a bitter word to say, but when he says it his eyes move to your lips. The kiss he had with you before inserting the dildo inside was so warm. He hasn't kissed anyone in a while so kissing you felt so warm and in that moment…as well as this moment, it felt like you belonged just for him. "What about your boyfriend?" Donghyuck let's go of your thighs by the bizarre thoughts in his head.

"During exams period he's on boyfriend hiatus," You smile, and Donghyuck swears that he can feel something inside his heart move by your smile.

"I think I should be going," He says after a while. "Oh yeah, we didn't even read the comments,"

Your legs feel cold when Donghyuck gets up and moves towards his laptop. Before he can even pick it up and bring it over to the bed - he's frozen on the spot by the amount of tips he sees. "No way."

"What?"

"We made 157,000 tips-" Donghyuck's eyes enlarge.

You don't know if that's a lot but compared to what he said he used to make which was 25,000 tips- you jolt when he cheers aloud and runs to the bed as his lips instantly attach to yours. The kiss is deep as he can't stop the excitement oozing out of him.

Parting from your lips he groans out in ecstasy. "This is greatest nights of my life," Taking his laptop, he returns on the bed and moves past the comments.

Sliding past the comments, your smile grows just from seeing him so happy. "They really like you babygirl, shit this is grand,"

While Donghyuck goes through the comments your eyes slowly close. It's not until your head is just hanging on his shoulder does Donghyuck notice you. Without much hesitation he carefully lays you down on the bed and covers you up. "You did good babygirl,"

-

Days and weeks pass with you and Donghyuck meeting up often for causality rather then sexual transaction. The tips converted to cash really helped him out. It's through his expenses that you got to learn more about Donghyuck. He's an aspiring Technician who loves creating gadgetry. He buys parts and compiles then together to create a working machine that operates. His presentations are 80's inspired and are aesthetically pleasing, but you're highly impressed by his commitment and dedication. To top it off, it's during exams period that you truly learn that he's a beast when it comes to studying. He uses the money to pass for his exam fees and uses portions of it to buy textbooks that he needs. You also learn officially that he's on scholarship. He often comes by your dorm room to take you up on your offer of both eating and studying (studying at your place is better because it's quiet and not like his rowdy apartment with other guys who walk in to discuss other things with him).

It's obvious that something has changed. Maybe you've both become trusting towards each other; he told you about his crisis with his mum. And how after his parents divorced she hadn't been strong on her own. She turned into prostitution and when Donghyuck was barely of age, she introduced him into that life. The night when he told you that, you felt it in your soul that he trusted completely.

Aside from twist, the both of you have been spending a lot of time together physically. As stated, exam period reduced the amount of times you'd engage in sexual activity, but that didn't mean that Donghyuck ignored you like he would in the past. No, he came to your dorm regularly to do things that you considered friends would do. For crying out loud you even Netflix and chilled with him to anime!

And on his end, things have changed because he's started taking an interest in you… He never missed a bit to mention how he prefers spending time with you then with his friends.

Having his lips on yours regularly should raise flags but it hasn't. Sometimes you kiss for his 30 second reels, other times he kisses you for good luck- because lately he's believed that ever since you helped him in surpassing his normal tips rate then it meant that you were a girl full of luck- hence his usual kisses.

Not only that, but you've gotten a bit more comfortable with your body around him. While his lives were cut down to once a week, he began uploading shorts and reels frequently. The shorts would be you with your mask dressed in cosplay clothes before it would cut to the next scene of him fingering you, other reels had him kissing you by cropping off the top of your face to only show yours and his lips together, and because he's taken a liking to bondage, he'd have you in knots around your ankles and wrists while you were naked and he'd slap your butt continuously watching it turn red, or have you try out the sponsored stuff that producers asked him to sell. The new toys were painful, but strangely really good.

The pain turned you on. And because his tips went up, so did his status on Kink Factory. He was now being sponsored with BDSM bondage toys and even cool cosplay outfits for you. While you never managed your own account, you started doing it for the fun of it. Having thousands of guys message you was hot. By posting little shots of your body here and there, never your face just your body. However when Donghyuck found out, he straight up asked you to not do it, to not sell yourself or your body online. He never did fan service as he said it's full of creeps, and it limited your promotion chances as in if employers searched your name they'd come to your account. If anything Donghyuck really didn't want you involved with the app- and in some way you understood especially when he mentioned that Chenle wouldn't appreciate random guys sending his girlfriend dick picks. And he wasn't lying, because your account was full and filled with thirsty horny guys.

So you removed your content and just stuck to normal social media. Donghyuck followed you! And even though for you it was something, for everyone else around him…it was weird. But who cares.

Aside from that, it's daily and nightly when you see Donghyuck in your house - much more than Chenle.

The other day when Donghyuck came over to study, you were on the bed resting up and before you knew it, he came up behind you and begin massaging your butt and shoulders, offering you tea and plainly being your diary where you complained about exams and Chenle's disappearance. Being with Donghyuck felt good, and that was a problem.

A lot of the things feel good with him. You know they're wrong, but they feel good. The way he rakes your hair or stands around you when you're cooking - or even causally tells you things like a friend would makes you feel some sort of way. If it's not him talking in your ear or him hugging you whenever you need a hug, then it's him sending you memes featuring himself and his gadgetry, this friendship has escalated into something that you don't even know. He even wonders about your studies and compliments you proudly when you bring good results back.

It almost feels like he's your boyfriend.

And it's when you begin to think like that, that you actually wonder where your real boyfriend is. The only reason Donghyuck's been consistent is because Chenle had seriously been MIA. Missing In Action. What was supposed to be a boyfriend hiatus turned into Chenle not pitching up once around you.

You thought you'd see Chenle at school or even during breaks but no, you always say alone and if lucky Donghyuck would find you and sit next to you while showing you his latest self built gadgetry and how it worked. Which even lead you to introducing Donghyuck to a classmate of yours Lee Taeyong who did Computer Science. Upon them meeting Donghyuck advertised his gadgets and demonstrated his skills of fixing a busted up laptop and that got him a solid intern position in a prestigious company.

So when Donghyuck comes over to your dorm for Kink Factory activity and recording, he doesn't rush straight into it like he would do in the past, instead he talks to you as he's been doing lately. Gosh, one time you both spoke before the live and never ended up doing it because you guys were deeply talking.

"I've been thinking," Donghyuck takes a seat next to you on the bed after setting up everything. "After tonight…I think it would be good to close my channel,"

Your ears perk up to that news, a smile groans on your face. "It's about time, I've been telling you that you're too smart for this. And from the time of getting to know you, I realised you weren't even a pervert who liked sex. You're just a person who had no other option. Well you had options you just chose the cheating route."

"I don't even like sex that much. It's draining." Donghyuck chortles, a smirk rising to his face. "Honestly with the amount of time I spent eating you out or fingering you or playing with the toys, it allowed my dick to rest and surely now, I feel healthy. I know this is overshare but really I feel like I've got my flow back,"

"Overshare or not, you always need to be healthy," You smile and bump into his shoulder with yours. "And I'm happy that you're healthy, you've been eating well too,"

"All thanks to you, my personal chef," he pats your head. "However I wanted to do something for you,"

"For me?"

Donghyuck nods his head. "Your boyfriend is one lucky guy," Donghyuck mutters. "So I'd rather we remained friends,"

And that word scares you. You can't say that all of a sudden you're in love with this guy who's been pleasing you and giving pleasure to your body. But you can say you've become attached to him and have seen him slowly opening up and all the cracks around him have come down. You don't love him, but you like him. Like him enough to not want to let this go.

"You don't like the sound of that either, do you?"

"It's not that I don't like it," You breathe in. "It's just, I started this whole thing with the intention to please my boyfriend in our sex life. But in doing it I realised that he had his own tip-only whatever kink, and he's pretty open in doing new things. But since I haven't seen him lately to practice the new stuff we've learnt, it's left me and you learning more about each other. I don't mind being friends, I just don't know if you'd still wanna be friends with me if we don't have s-sex,"

"That's not true at all," Donghyuck immediately says once you finish. "Take these past few weeks. We've spent more time talking to each other instead of pleasing each other. Which means that I like talking to you a lot more than we have sex. And plus we haven't even had sex yet,"

You lightly smile when Donghyuck wraps his arm around you and lays his head on yours.

"So what did you want to do for me?"

Donghyuck breathes in. "Well after tonight's last activity, I wanted us to just spoil each other. To thank you and to repay you for all your kindness by spending a day together."

"Last activity," You say. "What's it going to be?"

"Probably all the things you'd need to know in pleasing your boyfriend,"

And like usual Donghyuck sets a timer and gets back on the bed. Tonight there's no cosplay, no apron, no fancy outfit. You're in your pajamas and he's in his black clothes. The only thing you have is a mask, but it's under your chin as Donghyuck dives in for your lips.

By habit your body goes on top of him as he liked it better when you were on top. He smiles into the kiss when you settle down in straddling him. "Love it when you're on top,"

The night feels long when Donghyuck is removing your shirt, as you're taking off his shirt for the first time. Something about removing his shirt feels intimate. He's letting you be intimate with him. His warm hands go up your body and land on your back. Your lips are still locked with his and you can feel how hot his skin is under you. It makes you want to get closer to him, but you don't want to leave any gaps for space between the two of you. You keep your eyes closed. You've never been more content. He pulls away from the kiss and traces his lips over your cheek and neck. He unclips your bra and helps you remove it.

Unaware that the the live cam began a while ago, you're both aroused and deeply attached to each other that you don't even hear the music that starts playing.

From the camera angle and view, the viewers have a good shot of Donghyuck's spread legs and your body on top of it. It may not be visible because he's wearing black pants but for the most parts, his boner is evident when you roll your hips over him.

Jaemin bites his lips as he rubs over his boner in his pants while typing in the comments section. "Damn,"

Renjun sits up with his laptop over his thighs as he watches the screen of you and Donghyuck looking so hot and bothered and intimate. Lately with the amount of money he's been making, a lot of smart decisions have been going around. So as Renjun sees this, it just confirms his suspicions.

Flashback

"You like her don't you," Renjun starts.

Donghyuck closes the tap of water and turns around giving Renjun odd eyes. Donghyuck just came home and after washing up his face he's met face to face with an inquisitive Renjun. "Hi to you too,"

"You look at her like you love her, and online you touch her with tenderness. Feels like I'm watching an intimate scene between a couple,"

"Renjun? I'm beat, I just wanna sleep,"

"It's past midnight. Where were you?"

"You sound like an obsessive girlfriend," Donghyuck ignores Renjun and walks past him.

"That's because I have to stop you from doing something out of character. You can't like or even love this girl,"

"Where the hell is that coming from?"

"A place that knows she's not your type of girl." Renjun says. "She's got a boyfriend and she's way out of your league–"

"I don't like her dude, so quit stressing,"

"You spend so much time with her, you look at her like she's the only one, you've abandoned a lot for your hookups for her, so I can't quit stressing. You're making money, a lot of money then before, so I say ditch the girl and focus on your initial plan of studying. It's better you leave her instead of spending time with her–"

"Dude quit stressing."

End of Flashback

Renjun shakes his head when watching how Donghyuck spins you around and you land on the bed. His finger dips your mask down and he begins kissing you. He can't get enough of your lips and with your legs wrapped around him, it feels more intimate to have him close to your body.

"Is it just me, or does this feel more intimate?" Jaemin comments.

"It is," Renjun goes over to another tab opening up his Spotify and continues on writing his report. "It's break up sex if you ask me,"

Comments:

Let's get it!!! *Sends 100pts

His body looks so good *600pts

Finally we'll get the master doing his thing! *300pts

Shit is he removing his pants ?? Are they finally doing it?🤤 *900pts

Yes he is- but damn is it just me or has her riding picked up some expertise? 🎯 She's a natural fuck look at that hip roll *500pts

OMG! HIS LEGS ARE SO GOOD! *100pts

Now this is content I'll gladly pay a thousand to see. Let's enjoy the show 🍿 *2000pts

The moment we've all been waiting for 😆 *500pts

"Are you ready?" Donghyuck asks lowly, treating you like it's your first time. He can't get his eyes off you and you're heart is beating fast by how thick his penis is. By length and width it's thick and it's throbbing, and that's enough to frighten you. "Trust me, you're gonna like it,"

Already by the entrance of your wetness, the familiar feeling of the tip enters, but this time feeling how fleshy and hot it is makes your throw your head back. "Oh my goodness it's so big,"

"Wait till it gets in," Donghyuck's whole member throbs in pain, wanting so badly to be relieved by entering in you. He moans when it slowly makes its way inside of you.

Donghyuck holds onto your hands and continues to slowly make his length enter. Despite using the toys, you're still so fresh and tight.

"Shit, I'm nearly in," Donghyuck's sweaty forehead resembles yours. Your eyes are shut as you take him in with your wet lubed pussy.

You gasp out when his length enters into a deeper part in you - it's far better then the dildo and far better then his fingers. Donghyuck grunts by your throbbing core.

"Good? Does it feel good?"

You nod your head and bite you lip. Donghyuck continues in a slow pace, enjoying the feeling of your warm walls swallowing him and accepting him back inside with slight pressure. Donghyuck's thrusts are slow but they emit such a loud reaction from you. "Don't stop Donghyuck, oh my goodness! Yes!"

The comments are on fire, both from your first time and how passionate this looks. From Donghyuck's deep thrusts into you to his immerse gaze and chuckle he does by the sounds you make, only set the comments on fire.

For one Jeno can't stop beating his bush accordingly to the way Donghyuck thrusts into you. "Shit,"

Jaehyun in his room has his own fetish and sounds you make and even sends tips in hopes that the show lasts longer.

Mark in the bathroom can't help himself just like Jeno as he thrusts his cock into a fleshy hand held pussy. You're so precious and your innocence to Donghyuck's monstrous cock is what has everyone in heaps of ecstasy.

Donghyuck brings you closer to him as he gets off the bed and carries you. You're taken to another dimension when he pounds into you and you're bouncing off his dick. Your moans are erotic and are so loud that at some point even the music fades away. Donghyuck has his way with you loving how much you're loving his dick. Allowing himself to take different positions he gets your feet back on the ground and has your body turned so that your butt is facing him. Your hands hold onto the mattress and you get on your tippy toes when Donghyuck pounds himself into you - it's so rough and wild that you're fingers get slippery and you're laying flat on the mattress as Donghyuck holds onto your hips and continues to hammer into you.

While it feels like you're making love to tens of thousands of people, you can't even think of them as your mind is focused 100% on Donghyuck. With your shaking legs, and Donghyuck spanking your ass and gripping your thighs when lifting up your leg, you allow him to do what what wants with you- you've never felt this before.

But Donghyuck doesn't stop there, he moans when he takes a seat on the bed and you straddle him. He helps you to slide into him and he leaves you the platform to ride him. He moans when leaning back on the bed and slapping your butt continuously encouraging you. At some point as you rock his world into oblivion, he sits up so that he can hold onto your hips and thrust higher into you.

However as soon as he sits down and begins thrusting himself into you- he gets shocked by the figure standing by the way simply watching everything.

Freezing up, Donghyuck's eyes are on the door while you continue to ride him and throw your head backwards in pleasure. "Donghyuck~" You're moaning out his name and Donghyuck feels the most guilt when Chenle's beady and watery eyes move to your back and the camera. His eyes go over to the camera and to the clothes on the floor. He looks back down to his phone, to the Sex Sun's live and he's still in shock at how much your room resembles the room on the phone. To think that this was always your room only makes Chenle turn his head around and head into the living room. He takes a seat on the couch and continues to watch the live, but he connects it to the tv.

Watching you have the most fun on Donghyuck's dick only makes him feel inferior. So this is where you've been learning and getting bold.

-

Laying next to Donghyuck and you're panting and breathing out still trying to recover. "You were so good," Donghyuck compliments and turns his head to you.

You smile and allow the blanket to cover your whole body. "You were amazing. I've never felt that way before,"

"I'm…" Donghyuck shuts his eyes and curses lowly. "Sorry,"

"What?" You ask instantly noticing his demeanor. "What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry," Donghyuck opens his eyes and faces you. Seeing your eyes looking back into his with so much awe and trust only makes him feel more guilty. "This wasn't sex, I poured my all into this,"

You're confused by his words yet you still nod your head.

"I made love to you, because I like you a lot, babygirl," Donghyuck's sudden confession has you stuck when looking into his eyes. "Renjun was right, I like you a lot. B-but I can't do that to your boyfriend,"

"My boyfriend?"

"I think, he's here,"

You furrow your brows when Donghyuck mentions. "Here?"

And just in time the door breaks open a little and you're immediately up on the bed when making eye contact with his gaze. But just as his gaze meets yours, he's out of sight and you gasp in horror. "Oh my god." Hurrying up and out of the bed you're held back by your shaking legs and throbbing core. "Shit."

Donghyuck being attentive gets up from the bed and gets a shirt and underwear quickly from the ground. While Donghyuck helps you dress up in his boxers and your own shirt, you limp out your room. Chenle is sitting by the couch and he wipes his eyes when you come out of the room.

"Are you done?" His tone is broken and it only makes you whimper.

"Chenle. Wait, I can't explain,"

He nods his head and his gaze moves up to yours. You kneel down before him and hate how broken down he looks. "That's why I'm here, you owe me an explanation,"

"I…"

You can't continue when Chenle bites his lips and shakes his head. "You know Jisung lives across from your room right? And you know what he told me? That I'm not doing a good job with you in bed, because there's someone who makes you scream so loud that all your neighbours tune in to watch Sexy Sun have his way with you. Y/n you're my girlfriend. What's the meaning of all this? I didn't want to believe it because I know you. I know you wouldn't do this. I know that we're not damaged but when I watched Sexy Sun and began realising that your background looked a lot like the one he's always in, I didn't want to believe it. But then, we started having sex and things became different. You took control a lot more, you did things that we've never done before, heck you even brought in the toys that he used. Y/n? What explanation can you give?"

Your eyes just like his are immersed in tears. Why does it feel like you've broken his heart- of course you broke his heart, but why does it feel this way? Why does it have to be this way? He was never supposed to find out. You were never supposed to go back into Donghyuck's world. But you did, and you enjoyed it but yet you can't bring yourself to open up your mouth and explain to your boyfriend that all that you did was for him. How would you even begin to explain to him your reasoning? In a place of him being happy that you learnt for him, he's upset and you're upset because it's like 3 puzzles all falling and breaking and mixing in with other pieces that don't belong to each other. This isn't how it's supposed to be.

"You have nothing to say right?"

You shake your head. "I wasn't cheating on you. I promise. I just, I did this for us, so that our sex life could be better. He was only teaching me-"

Chenle can't believe his ears. What did you just say? "T-teaching you? Thousands of people tune in at night to watch him fuck you and you're saying he was teaching you? How-" Chenle bites his lips and stands up getting your hands off his knees. He runs his hands past his hair. "And you have the nerve to say you weren't cheating? You allowed another guy to see you- he held you in his arms and you fucked him. You were moaning- moaning out his name! And you sit there and say you did this for our sex life? How does yelling his name bring benefit from our sex life? Y/n-"

"Chenle baby you're-"

"Don't call me baby." Chenle snaps. "I love you and this is what you do? Couldn't you have been honest with me? That I'm a terrible lover and don't know how to have sex with you? Did you have to go to him? Invite him in your bed? Invite thousands of people to watch him screw you? Over 600k people were watching you- and you want to say that you did it for us? Y/n even if you covered up your face I've known your eyes from the first time we've met. The moment I realized it was you was the same night I played for you that video. The first time he changed his girl. It was you, wasn't it?"

Your tongue feels heavy and your mind is blank as you hear his broken tone and his eyes getting red by the intense emotions he's feeling. He can't even look at you as he's so disappointed and angry and sad and lost and just so…how could you do this to him?

"You were in an affair with him for months now and I just let it slide because I'm like, you'll come clean to me. But you never did." Chenle shakes his head. "You never did."

Chenle sniffs and his eyes get pissed when seeing you're wearing black boxers that don't even belong to you.

"Suppose I believe that you did this all for me, what am I supposed to do next? What are we supposed to do next? Where can we go on from here? It's now engraved in my head that whenever I screw up in bed you'll go and learn from somebody else and bring it into our relationship. I can't- I can't even begin to fathom how that makes sense? Y/n how is it possible that you did this? So if I see that we've got problems, it's okay for me to go out and sleep with another girl and then bring back her teachings in our relationship? Is that how it works?"

The more he speaks, the more you begin to wonder why you agreed to do it again with Donghyuck.

"It's the fact that it all made sense to you to continue and pursue this relationship behind my back but yet to a thousand of people. I can't even- Y/n? I…" Chenle rubs his face looking drained. "Are you not going to say anything?"

"I don't want you to break up with me," You speak lowly looking down. "But judging from how this is going, you're going to break up with me right?"

That seems to tip Chenle off even more. "You don't even feel any remorse or shame in yourself-"

"I do feel remorse-"

"Clearly it's not enough because you want to break up," Chenle fires back and you shake your head.

"Chenle it's not like that-"

"He's already moulded you and customised you into–"

You shake your head. "Chenle please-"

"The way you called his name, the way he looked at you, you mean to tell me that even if we continue on together, you'll easily forget him and how much excitement he's brought to your body?"

"Chenle just listen to me–"

"You aren't saying anything so I think it's fair to just…" To say that it's over is the toughest words to leave his mouth. So instead of saying it, he walks past you and out the door.

When the door closes you slump on the couch and fold your lips as the tears swell by your eyes. In the end, it would've all been for nothing. Sleeping with Donghyuck would've all been for nothing, because it's clearly clear how this was all a bad mistake. Chenle leaving your dorm room only made you break down because you just lost your boyfriend. Your boyfriend who has been with you for so long. Who you were sure you could love forever. You just didn't expect him to turn around and leave. But to be fair, you wouldn't want him to have done the same thing to you. It would've made you feel like you're not enough, so you can understand Chenle's feelings.

The sound of something being dropped off by your room door makes you flinch and look up to see Donghyuck standing there, he's all dressed up and has bag over his shoulder looking guilty. "Hey," he says softly.

You're too embarrassed and overwhelmed with emotions to even look at him. He puts his bag down and takes a seat next to you on the couch. Rubbing his head he wraps his arms around you- only for you to shake your head and move away from him. "Go home." You know he wants to talk to you but if you let him right now, you know it'll only make you feel worse. He shouldn't even be here in the first place. If you were honest, you knew how much Donghyuck cared about you. But you were just too stupid to get that. Now look where it's got you.

Donghyuck doesn't know what to do. He's never been in a position like this. While you and Chenle were discussing in the living room, he was cleaning up, dressing up, packing up and even eavesdropping.

Donghyuck isn't dumb he knew this is what would happen. No guy in their right mind would allow his girl to cheat and then come back to him. But to be fair, Donghyuck was also to blame. Although he started off as not caring for you or you're relationship, the result of the end product is that he cared enough for you and didn't want to do Chenle dirty. But now that Chenle cut himself out the picture, Donghyuck doesn't know whether or not if this is what he wants.

He's still trying to figure out exactly what he wants. So, in the midst of his inner turmoil, Donghyuck finds himself sitting there on the couch next to you, holding you tight in an embrace that neither of you wanted. He knows you need space but he also wishes that maybe he was strong enough to convince you otherwise.

Is this going to kill you if he does stay? Are you really going to be fine without him? Or will you still miss him when he leaves? Will you fall apart again?

In the end, he decides not to say anything and you're surprised when he carries you back in your room and pulls the blanket up to your chin. He kisses you gently on your forehead and leaves. "I'm sorry."

-

It's almost unbearable to go to school for the next couple of weeks. Thank goodness for the school break that's coming soon. The past few weeks have been nothing but misery and frustration for you. It's almost like Chenle has vanished from the face of the earth. You occasionally make out Jisung leave his room, and you can't help but despise him. He did nothing but tell the truth, but hell did he really have to tell the truth? None the less Chenle is scarce around Campus. And when you do see him, or he sees you, he's quick in making a U-turn and walking away. It's almost scary how angry he looks when you see him by chance. He looks beyond pissed and he's always got a resting poker face filled with hatred and rage. You're broken in your soul because you know that it's because of you why he's now dead inside.

You also hate how Donghyuck has also been scarce from your life. After that last sexual activity you swear it's like the whole world knew who you were. If it wasn't random guys coming to ask if you were the girl in Sexy Sun's cam and you lied saying it's not you, then it was the non stop messages and attachments to your name as well as girls asking you why Sexy Sun deleted his Kink Factory account.

By now some people with brains connected the dots that you were in a relationship but because of your account and your kink sessions with Donghyuck - it caused you all to leave the platform. And because the rumours were true, you just decided to leave Kink Factory. There was no reason to stay there when all your reasons to even join had left and abandoned you.

You've thought about what you did, you had time to reflect on your actions, and while consensual sex with Donghyuck was a term, the condition was that your boyfriend wouldn't find out. But since he found it, you realized that from the get go that type of term and condition was non-negotiable for you as you were already in a relationship.

It sucks that you caught feelings for Donghyuck only after having that breakup sex, but it hurts more when you were left to deal with it alone.

You were too chicken to go and look for Donghyuck by his normal friends group, so your school days became dull completely. So much for being the unknown girl on campus with granny panties, to being the most famous Kinker on Kink Factory, to being another reject who got caught up in scandals.

Being wallowed by your own stress and misery, you fail to see a hurrying figure bump into you making the papers in your hands fall. You apologize when the guy helps you pick up your papers as well.

"Oh, hey Y/n,"

You look up and meet Taeyong. "Hi,"

"Sorry about that," He dusts your papers before giving it back to you. "I was rushing to the Computers Convention, wanna come with me? Donghyuck's been chosen to represent our university against the other universities."

Hearing Donghyuck's name, you're not sure if you want to come or if you just want to bury the past and never think of him again. Unfortunately your decision is already made when Taeyong grabs your hand and starts sprinting with you behind him.

Upon heading to the auditorium gym hall, you're swamped into a world of tech and science when meeting geeky experts one and alike. You stick close to Taeyong for the most parts, but after a while when gazing at an interesting machine you lose Taeyong. Debating on going out or staying in the hall, you're decision is once again made for you when you lock eyes with Chenle.

It's no shock that your eyes enlarge, but it's even more shocking when his gaze doesn't divert from yours, and to make it worse for you he begins to approach you. He doesn't have that almighty scowl when he looks at you, but instead his face is neutral.

"Hi,"

"Why are you approaching me?" You don't mean for it to come off rude and standoffish, but it does and you quickly have to add on. "I'm the last person you want to see,"

Chenle is taken aback by your defence but he doesn't rebut it. "Just saying 'hi'. I figured it's about time I stop avoiding you,"

You have nothing to say to that except maybe nod your head. You both stand in an awkward silence, with his gaze lowered and yours to the floor it's clear that neither of you are willing to talk. And it pains Chenle to swallow the bitter truth but he sighs.

"Who am I kidding," he mumbles as is gaze slightly meets yours and then going around the hall. "I thought that…after some time we could get back together and that I'd be able to forgive you and we could move past this moment. But seeing you now just makes me understand that we were both with each other for the mere fact that nobody else wanted to be with us,"

That gets your attention and sadly Chenle hits the nail on the spot. You've never really thought why you and Chenle were together other for the fact thar you were each other's companies.

"I would've probably turned the other cheek when I found out about your affair with Donghyuck, but I realized that by day and by night we were slowly drifting apart. Jisung confirmed my suspicion when he mentioned Donghyuck coming by whenever I'd leave," Chenle looks down. "We were already drifting apart, we just found ways to act on it. You did it through sex with another guy and I did it by clicking well with other guys who accepted me in their clique."

Although you don't like that word affair, you get struck in the heart by his confession. Drifting apart… That could've been the case. That's something you can agree to, but admitting it sounds so tough, because all your life you never contradicted Chenle or raised your voice to him or even opposed his statement. "I guess I did it with the intent on pleasing you. But the second time around when I agreed, another part of me liked the new feelings I began feeling."

Chenle nods his head. "So," he sighs. "I'll always love you, maybe in a different way, but I know for certain you were my first in my aspects of life,"

"Same here," You nod your head and you both make brief eye contact.

Your encounter with Chenle ends there when you both embrace each other in a hug. One thing that Chenle was good at, were his hugs. He's so warm and gentleman when he hugs you. After the embrace, you both part and go your separate ways. For some reason, it feels like a sweet parting when you both makeup and you see him being content with his group of geeky nerdy friends.

Meanwhile there's you, still trying to navigate yourself out, but it's like you were purposely brought here to make amends with everyone because the next person you bump into is none other then Donghyuck. Unlike Chenle and your awkward greeting, Donghyuck's whole face lights up as he greets you. "Babygirl hey!" his eyes brightening as he cherishes you and brings you in a hug that's full of contentment. He lights up when he sees you. And then his entire face turns completely red when he pulls you away. He looks away from you and mutters something about being in charge of the robotics and he had to get back. But before he leaves he turns back to you. "Wanna come along?"

"I don't even really know why I'm here, so I'll just–"

“It’s been too long since I saw you.” You laugh awkwardly at the statement forgetting all reasons why you were angry at him. "I figured that since you needed time, I could give you space, but seeing as you're here, come with me."

Holding your hand and intertwining your fingers makes your heart feel light. It doesn't matter how much you try to convince yourself that this is wrong or right. Even if this isn't real, it feels so good. So good that you can hardly think straight as the two of you walk through the hall until you reach his main booth stand and you realize this might be the only chance you ever have with Donghyuck to change the course of how you see each other.

Your eyes are brought to life by the advanced prototype machines that you see Donghyuck had built. The once projects that were half finished are now polished and looking amazing. "Wow, Donghyuck this is amazing,"

"Cool right?" Donghyuck smiles and nudges his head to a group of people. "Those judges right there are gonna come here in a few and I need to present and sell my work to them. I was nervous as fuck, I was jittery the whole day, but then I saw you and knew that my gold charm had come back,"

That makes you blush when he steps closer to you. His hand cautiously rests on your neck before his eyes search in between yours for a moment as he leans in closer. "The only way to activate my luck is through kissing you,"

You swallow hard. He's so close. The way his breath caresses your lips sends electricity down your spine. Your gaze shifts from his mouth to his eyes and they're dark brown that look almost black. His gaze softens further. When he closes the distance between you and places his free hand behind your head, you're lost but happy. His warm hand brushes against your cheek and you can barely keep your eyes open. His hand cups your face and then, he kisses you and your mind goes blank.

He's warm. Everything about him is so warm. It's comforting and you lean into his warmth as you both melt into one another. It's perfect. And so, so easy. Like you've always known him as someone who would do anything for you and nothing less. You let your hands rest on his chest as you kiss him back ever so passionately. And after a while, he pulls away gently. His thumb rubs small circles on the skin under your jaw. "I'm guessing this kiss is the start of something," he says softly.

You're afraid to nod, afraid to feel anything.Is it correct to be entering into something with him when you're not even sure what it is? Is this what it means for your soulmate to be someone whom you never thought would be your end?

You're scared, terrified that this will end badly. That you'll ruin whatever it is that you've made with him. You're scared that he'll leave and never look back, but at the same time…

You're happy.

And that's enough.

So you lean back in and kiss him again. He hums quietly, and then he kisses you harder and deeper than before. You hold him back, your arms wrapping around his waist as you tilt your head forward, allowing him to deepen the kiss. "Don't put my kiss to shame. Present well,"

Stealing one more kiss from you, Donghyuck nods his head. "I will,"

And so when the judges come, Donghyuck with a few cuts on his face but patted with a soft bandage looks extremely excited and eager to present his passion to the judges.

Donghyuck opens up the machines, and they are not only retro but they are so pleasing to look at. There aren't any obvious problems with their designs that you can tell, but there are subtle differences. The metal parts that connect to one another and create a network look intricate yet sturdy. You watch as he explains each part and uses a variety of technical terms to show off the functionality, but also the beauty of each pieces. But then you look at Donghyuck and all thoughts disappear as you watch him with the biggest smile ever gracing his beautiful features.

The machines work, and even as one of the judges goes to test it; it's functionality is solid and you applaud when the judges give back positive feedback. Donghyuck's team and group are given a pass and you walk around with Donghyuck just exploring the other gadgets. In his true form you find it adorable how geeky and nerdy he is when it comes to tech and robotics.

As you follow the judges you who judge the other schools there, your heart falls for those who's projects aren't meeting the expectations as well as for those who primarily aren't as enthusiastic when presenting. In the end the judges get onstage to announce the release winner as well as full-time position with their company.

Sneaking himself behind you and snaking his hand over hips Donghyuck whispers in your ear. "What am I getting if I win?"

"A full-time job,"

He chuckles breathlessly in your ear and you feel so heated hearing his voice. "No, I mean from you. It's been a while but we could do something,"

That gets you bubbly and tingly. "No camera,"

"Of course,"

You think in the same mind as him and get super excited when the presenter announces the first place winner. You're jubilated when it's your university and Donghyuck's team. You're not expecting Donghyuck to join his lips with yours but he does it anyways, and you're surprised but so glad at how much you've missed him. How much you didn't want to be parted from him despite not wanting to be apart with him but wanted his attention, his love. And he gives it. A hundred times more than you deserved.

"I notice you don't smoke anymore," You mention when sitting across from him eating your pastry.

"I still do, just not as excessively," He smiles. "Why? Do you want me to stop?"

"Now that you mention it, I've never liked it's smell,"

"I'll try my best to not, but regardless I wanted to ask you something,"

You nod your head.

"What do you think of us?"

You bite your lip and look down nervously. "I'm scared that it's only pure physical attraction between us and that, we maybe are just in lust with each other,"

It makes Donghyuck smirk as he laughs lightly and looks up to meet your eyes. "But..?" he prompts.

"I guess…I mean I'm not an expert, but I think that you're cute. And I love the fact that we get along together,"

He lets out a low chuckle. "And?"

"Donghyuck," You playfully pout, but he goes on.

"And I like you," He looks in between your eyes. "I like spending time with you. I miss spending time with you…I don't want to scare you, so I'm not saying I want to date you, because that'd be crazy especially since you got out of your relationship, and I definitely don't want to get married to you either, because that'd be stupid and too son, but what I'm saying is that I'd love you. To spend time with you,"

"Donghyuck…"

"I wanna see, where this goes." Looking at his face, you find a determination within his eyes that you haven't seen before. It's something different from his usual playful nature and you realize he must've been waiting for some time to talk to you about this subject. It must've gotten to him. He has a serious side too, which scares you because no matter what he said earlier, there was always going to be fear for the future. Even if you weren't planning on being with him, there was always going to be the possibility that one of these days he's going to realize that he wants something more with you than friendship.

You take a deep breathe in. You know this might sound weird coming from you, but you actually want to hear it. "Are you really asking me to go out with you?"

"I've never actually asked a girl out. It's always 'do you want to sleep with me?' but," Donghyuck bites his lip looking nervous and shy. "If you want, we could do something like this more often,"

You stare at him for a long time thinking about his question. Are you ready? Are you ready to risk your reputation? Are you ready for all of these feelings that keep swirling around inside of you?

As the answer is yes to all those questions, a smile breaks from your face and you nod your head.

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"- so mad right now. But there's nothing I can do." The camboy, Sexy Sun says while fapping softly on his manhood. He groans and goes a bit slower. "I know you guys are gonna get mad since you subscribed to my cam because I fuck old women, but ever since Cammy retired, my network has been fucked. They keep giving me this other old hag who I've collaborated with and I'm tired of her. She runs her mouth too much, sucks dick way too hard, her moans are annoying, and to top it all off... She's so saggy, way too old for my liking and used. And I get people like that kind of fucked up shit, old lady with hot young male- but I've had it up to here with it. I don't want to stick my dick anywhere near her. I was in her once and got so sick for a week. Like why can't they just give me another old hag- I'd honestly take anyone else then her." Sexy Sun looks intensely into the camera now letting go of his hard, thick and throbbing dick. He smirks and places his finger on the tip of his slit- teasing himself. "Comment section is full of shit right now, but I'm so hard it doesn't even affect me. If you fucking think you can sink into old sagging vagina be my guest and submit your CV."

Comments:

- me! *Sends 60pts!

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You instantly shut your phone when hearing the bathroom door open up. Hiding your phone underneath your pillow, you sit up watching your boyfriend, Chenle leave the bathroom in nothing but white boxers and a white shirt with his glasses on. With an excited grin plastered over his face, he hurries over to the bed with hopeful eyes. You smile warmly looking away shyly when he sits on the side of your bed his eyes moving all over your body.

Dressed in his favorite baby blue night silk night gown, his eyes travel down your figure landing on your knees where the silk ends. He gets up with an eager and excited smile on his face. "Are you ready?" He smiles wiggling his eyebrows in anticipation.

Feeling shy, you nod your head failing to hide your own excitement and thrill. It's been approximately 3 weeks and 4 days since you last had intercourses with your boyfriend. And right now you can't help but feel needy for him.

He angle your back while he gets on top of you by trapping your thighs in between his legs.

"Can I hold onto your hips?" He asks for permission. You eagerly nod your head. His face warms up into a light shade of red, just as his hands get jittery he lets out a little laugh. Like usual, his hands hesitantly hold onto your hips and then awkwardly his hands run up and down your bare thigh. He loved feeling your thighs just as much as he liked laying on them. Your thighs weren't thick, but they weren't skinny either, they had the perfect amount of meat and just the right amount of smoothness. Your skin was pampered and felt just like a baby's bottom, and despite having a bit of hairy legs, or some marks here and there or even light stretch marks, Chenle adored your body to the fullest.

Which is why as he roams his hands around your thighs, he whispers out how much he loves your body.

With your permission, he bends both your knees watching attentively as your silk dress rides up your thighs revealing your baby blue underwear. You bite your lip placing your hand over your mouth as your fingers play with your lips. Chenle's hands are a bit naughty and spread your legs wider giving him a better view of your glory. His fingers press onto your core and you jolt a little. It's a little too fast but that doesn't stop you from squirming a little. He starts stroking at your opening through your underwear and smiles when looking up to you. He's quick in getting off the bed and kneeling down on his knees using 3 fingers to rub the material roughly against your clitoris. Having a better view from his angle his mouth adjures and he sticks his tongue out being hypnotized by the sight. He removes his glasses allowing them to rest and be embraced by his slightly curly hair.

You 'ha' and 'mh' and grind your hips lightly against his fingers loving as he rubs your knob in a blissful circular motion with all three of his fingers. He sniffs and fumbles his hands down his boxers playing with his own possession as it jerks on it's own. "You're getting wet." Chenle marvels.

He was always amazed at how beautiful your body looked. You never failed to amaze him. It's one thing to see you naked but another thing entirely to see you like this, clothed but squirming in delight because of him.

There seems to be an ego boost he feels when pleasing you like this. Chenle knew that he was off the spectrum of manly man. All the boys on campus had a form and build to them that automatically made them desirable, yet for some reason people like himself were known as nerds. And as nerds are known, it was impossible for them to get laid. But Chenle hit the jackpot when he found himself another 'nerdy' friend who ended up becoming his girlfriend.

You and Chenle had been dating ever since you found each other- that would be the beginning of the school year. And maybe your relationship with him wasn't as deep as you wanted it to be, but your relationship was good enough for both of you to benefit from things you've both wanted to experience.

You were both inexperienced when it came to many things that had boundaries, but you both tried them out as a way to not miss out on anything. You were the type of awkward couple to get shy with displaying your feelings publicly in front of other people, yet when you were alone with him you both watched porn and tried to mimic the actions shown in the videos. You were both smart in your own modules and courses, yet when it came to other things such as being young adults you both knew nothing- and so the beauty of your relationship was how the both of you were figuring things out with each other.

And tonight is no different, when you feel a bubbling feeling erupting in your stomach from the waves of pleasure- you gasp out loud when you feel your body tingle in pleasure. "That was so good," You comment out in tiny and Chenle nods his head with wide eyes.

"Next time we can try to make you squirt,"

You nod your head excitedly. He gets up from the floor and positions himself in front of you. Awkwardly removing his boxers, your eyes are firmly on his shaft and hard manhood- he places a condom on it and you open your legs a bit wider. He removes your underwear leaving them by your knees and then he directs his member into your wet core. You moan a little just from the way it slips inside you.

Aside from you and Chenle trying out everything together- and respectfully you were both each others firsts, there always seemed to be something wrong when you both got to this stage. The stage were he'd insert his manhood in you. You don't know why he never put it in fully, or why it was suddenly small and only filled a portion of your entrance but aside from that you always thought something was wrong.

It would always slip right in due to your wet core, but the problem occurred when he began rocking his hips. You didn't feel any pleasure, at all. But instead you just felt like you were warming his cock while he arched his back and breathed aloud while humping. He humped but nothing was moving down there- and just before you know it, he'd remove his penis and quickly cum in the rubber protection while you faked a moan.

Always he'd be too happy and tired and then he'd take some tissue and wipe on your core (from your own previous juices) and he cleaned himself up before you got into bed and slept.

However this time, this night you don't sleep. You wait for him until he's fast asleep and he doesn't feel you slipping from his arms as you make your way to the bathroom.

Sneaking to the bathroom you pull out your phone and slide down the wall. Unlocking your phone, you're met with the blank screen of Sexy Sun's ended live. You take in a deep breath and click on his profile. You're hesitant to send a message- however when the events of today roll up in your mind you can't help but feel motivated to send him a message.

After all he did think you had cute granny panties.

[Earlier flashback]

You were walking to your next class, when something foul happened. A group of boys all running past you purposely pushed your books to the ground while others lifted up your dress and making it tangle under your armpits. Gasping in horror as they ran away, you tried to force your dress down, but it was just too hard- eventually it got down and you felt embarrassed by the on lookers who were snickering and laughing quietly.

Jerks.

You thought to yourself.

Panting hard, your cheeks grow red from the passing crowd that giggle within themselves. Adjusting the glasses on your face you squat all the way down to get your things, trying to move just as fast to not get interrupted or be late for your class.

Getting to class by a few minutes late, you reside on the backseat level that's far from the rest of the class present in the auditorium. Your shoulders are sunken down, your mood dropped to one of despair. Oh my goodness that was so embarrassing. How many people where there? How many people saw?

You're so deep in your thoughts that you don't notice the figure that approaches you in your backseat. With the way you're thinking so deeply, it takes a loud thud to snap you out of your head and into reality. You jump lightly when you finally take note of the figure. However, your eyes enlarge just as you blink multiple of times.

"You dropped these," Donghyuck, the notorious popular camboy that Chenle liked watching stands beside you. He moves behind you before taking a seat right next to your chair. Turning to you, he's got a smirk on his lips. You're in awe and feel your breath leaving your body.

The way that Donghyuck moves is… mesmerizing. You can't help but watch him with fascination, the way he's moving like the wind. It's almost like there's nothing holding him down. You can see his lips begin to move yet you don't hear anything- and you physically slap yourself to get yourself to focus as you look away from Donghyuck.

Donghyuck who's never fazed by anything, gets stunned when seeing you slap yourself. His playful smirk gets on his face when he insinuates that you were probably zoned out and slapped yourself to focus. The lecturer begins to teach but Donghyuck (who doesn't even belong to this class) scoots his seat closer to yours feeling mischievous.

You notice that the books he placed on your table were the ones that fell when those hooligans' dropped your books. Too afraid to turn to him, you feel your entire being freeze when feeling heat by your side and suddenly his lips are close to your ears giving your warmth as he whispers. "I liked your panties."

You're stuck with your eyes wide open just as your breath hitches in your throat.

"Cute granny panties." He chuckles lowly loving how tense you become. "I'll pay you enough money to take them off,"

"Wha-" You start but he places one finger over your mouth effectively shutting you up and making your cheeks burn hot under his touch. He doesn't stop laughing lowly as he removes a fold piece of paper note money and places it on your desk.

"Fuck your hot," He whispers, his hand going over his covered pants. "Take off your panties, I want them,"

You don't say anything, instead your breathing tries to stay calm as you witness him palming himself.

"Come on baby, give them,"

You don't know what possess you to do it, but looking at the money on your desk, you feel hot and bothered and you nervously reach up underneath your dress and place your finger tips by the starting line of your panties. You slowly slide them, lifting your butt up a little to further pull them down. No one ever notices you in the backseat of the class, so you're not too worried of being caught, however you are worried that as your panties are coming off you'll be left exposed.

Shifting them and removing them off your legs, you shut your legs when you see your peach panties in his grasp. Shamelessly he places them against his face and sniffs on them. He inhales sharply while his other hand on his bulge continues to palm excessively. "You smell amazing," He whispers in your ear, stopping himself from sniffing. He places your panties in his leather jacket pocket and he stops palming himself.

Your eyes are surprised by that large imprint of his bulge and you clear your throat trying to look away.

"I've got a cam in Kink Factory, hit me up if you want your panties back," Donghyuck whispers eagerly looking into your blushed face. "I go by the name of sexy sun. While you're at it, send me a dm and send in your cv. I'd love to smell you more,"

[End of flash back.]

As soon as he left the class you remember how wet you were from the bizarre encounter with him. Not only did Donghyuck notice you, but he took your underwear and personally invited you to send him a message.

Not knowing if he'll remember you, you try to keep your message brief.

Sweet girl Y/n:

Hi. You took my panties today in class.

You're not surprised by how long you have to wait for him to send you back a message, but when he does you feel yourself feeling wide awake even though you were tired.

Sexy Sun:

Gotta be more specific girly.

I take everyone's panties

You feel yourself blushing a little by his text. Nervously you bite your lip and type again.

Sweet girl Y/n:

You said I had cute granny panties

You're surprised that as soon as the message is sent, you get a quick reaction and reply.

Sexy Sun:

Oh, my babygirl

Video call?

Your eyes widen again but you're too slow to react when just within a short second you see his icon pop up as he requests a video call. You rapidly jolt up silence the volume, getting up you run to your bed side and pick out your earphones before sprinting back to the toilet and shutting the door behind you.

You quickly answer before physically slapping yourself that you forgot to check your background.

Donghyuck upon your connection chuckles lightly when seeing you slap yourself. "My baby loves getting slapped, doesn't she?" He's drinking from a wine glass and his background is a bit dim then when he was in the live.

You clear your throat before brushing your hand behind your hair. "Hi, and no,"

"You sure about that?" Donghyuck snickers when your face grows red. He runs his thumb across his bottom lip taking his time to look at you. "How come I don't know you?"

"Hm?" You don't know how to answer, so you bite your lip. "I don't know,"

Donghyuck zooms the camera out of his face, before positioning it someplace. "I'll cut to the chase baby girl, I love your underwear. You've got a perfect ass and you smell fucking amazing. Wanna be my cam girl?"

You're like a dear caught in headlights when staring at the screen. Donghyuck- you hold your breath when by the view of his camera you can see him sliding his pants down and his hard member springs up. His hands are out of the frame before you make out him pouring some lube on his hands before they go down his shaft.

"Be my cam girl babygirl," He jerks off right before your very eyes and you gulp while squeezing your legs shut feeling something.

Tagged along together with Donghyuck's grunts of pleasure and the sight so wholesome of himself masturbating has you cooing like a little girl and squeezing your legs shut.

"You'd be the luckiest girl if I get to touch your pretty little pussy everyday and make it mine." He mutters just as you hear his fapping becoming louder. "Don't you want that? To be used by me?"

"But I have a boyfriend," Your voice suddenly finds reason to come out.

Donghyuck shrugs his shoulders. "So what? I wanna fuck you up. You're fucking hot, shit. My fans would love you. You look like a virgin, are you a virgin? Actually don't tell me, I don't care if you have a boyfriend I want to fuck you up so badly that you'll go back to your daddy broken and only thinking of me,"

You don't know how to respond to his passive aggressive statement yet the sight of him edging himself while closing tightly onto his penis has you weak and bothered that you can't even keep your eyes on his face but they're only on manhood.

"You'll get paid twice if you tag together with me," He moans throwing his head back when reaching a specific spot. "My partner was the best I'd ever ask for but then she got betrothed. So I need a partner to fill up her position,"

"I don't know how to be a cam-"

Donghyuck shakes his head tilting it to the side while gazing at you. It hits you that he's using you as you're watching him as a means to get off. Just from his hazy eyes to his parted lips from time to time, you feel shy knowing he's peering at you with those eyes. "All you have to do, is be pretty," His voice is husky and his body begins to shudder. He lets out a repeated stream of curses. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!"

Your eyes enlarge when he combusts and comes undone in the spot. There's semen shooting in every direction, others fly out the frame, others land on his clothes and some lucky bits land on the camera making you feel some way. You bite your lip and your heart heaves in your chest. You shouldn't have been watching him get off but it was so addicting.

"Look what you made me do, pretty girl," He smirks wiping the camera and resting on his seat after partially cleaning himself up.

You have no words, only except you can't stop squeezing your legs by the pool patching on your underwear. "My boyfriend has never done that," You meekly say when Donghyuck runs his hand over his hair. "How can I do that to him?"

"How can he jerk off?" Donghyuck quizzes with a mocking tone. "Babygirl a man who can't please himself, can't please you. How would you rate your sex life with your partner? Assuming you're not a virgin,"

You take in a sharp breath as your eyes wonder around.

"After cumming, do you guys go for another round?"

Your eyes enlarge by that question. Never. After a minute or so- when Chenle is done he tugs you in his arms and you both sleep.

Unfortunately your silence and Bambi stare into the unknown is all the answers he needs to know your boyfriend is not satisfying you.

"How many times does he make you squirt?"

The question evokes another surprise reaction from you making Donghyuck snicker. "Babygirl by the looks of it you're still a virgin. Whatever the fuck your boyfriend is doing isn't working. How about this," Donghyuck's eyebrow perks up as his eyes move to your chest again. It's what got him hard the first time, you're in a silk dress that exposes much skin - almost as if you wanted to tempt him in soft baby colors. You were so adorable like a rabbit and he felt like a snake about to ravish your innocence. "You be my camgirl and I'll show you some tricks to spice up your sex life with your boyfriend,"

In response to his offer you gulp and breathe in and out before slightly nodding.

And that right there is your stamp on a sealed envelope of your involvement with Donghyuck.

-

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Sexy Sun

Following: 68 kinks | Followers: 82k kinkers

Subscribers: 12k | Cam Posts: 45 videos

* Bio: Technician by day, college student by afternoon, fuckboy by night

* Gender: I was born a baby boy, I'm a husky male now

* Interested in: I like my females old

* Tip: Tip me with money and points

* Kinks: Sky's the limit

* Perks: Not sure how to answer this;fast hips;can make you cum more than three times

* Earnings: I wish I was cheap but I weigh over

→ ¥70 per video

→ ¥30 one night per chat

→ ¥100: full subscription

Stay for as long as you like, chat with me, tease me, because by morning I'll be gone and it'll all be a dream and I'll be in my condo working on my machines

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Format: Review CV

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Name: Y/n

Username: Sweet girl Y/n

Interested in: Man

What are you looking for: To fulfill my sexual life with my partner by watching and learning from camboys and camgals

What are your goals: To please my partner

Are you in a relationship: Yes

Perks: Innocent

Do you think you're attractive: It depends

Do you have kinks: I'm not sure

Why do you want to be a cam kinker: Because I want to learn how to please my boyfriend

Who recommended you: Sexy Sun

What's your budget (or preferred budget): ¥10

Are you aware this placement is a fixed and permanent position: Yes

Are you aware you'd need to be working from late hours: Yes

Would you mind revealing parts of your body: No

Have you had intercourse publicly: No

Have you played with yourself on cam: No

Do you take nudes: No

Do you realize there's a possibility of your pictures getting leaked: Yes

Hence are you comfortable with your pictures getting leaked: No

Are you comfortable commuting to placement areas: Yes...but it will depend where it'll be

Last question, are you ready to be used like a filthy toy: ...

CV Status: @ Pending @ Rejected @ Accepted

Reviewing your answers to your CV sent to Donghyuck, you wonder if you answered the questions well. To be fair you answered honestly to the best of your abilities, so you just hope he'll be pleased. Closing your phone again for the umpteenth time you try to pay attention to Chenle as you're both seated on some steps while eating your lunch.

"They said if we're lucky we'll write the Pre merits papers by next week." Chenle drones out about a curriculum in his course. You can hardly stay focused as you curiously pick up your phone again to see if you've been selected.

Of course Donghyuck said he wanted you, but he always said you should send your CV to him and he'd have to line you up against other possible options. While he masturbated and spoke to you, you had a feeling as if he was testing you and your skills. You don't know if you passed that round, but if you didn't then you were hoping that your CV would boost you up. In all honesty, you felt somewhat special because a playboy infamous camboy recognised you and said you were hot.

From who else were you going to hear that from? You had no friends in this college, you only had Chenle and 3 years have passed since you joined. No one seemed interested in you and when you tried branching and reaching out to other people you felt scared of being rejected. It's happened so many times that you just didn't want to experience it anymore. So being with Chenle is refreshing, however upon capturing the attention of another guy (a hot guy) you wanna make sure that he's still in your lane.

Yet when you check your phone and see that your status hasn't changed you sigh.

"What's wrong babe?" Chenle's concerned voice pips and you switch off your phone hiding it from his view.

"Nothing," You cooly let it pass, but attempt to get some answers from him. "Chenle, am I hot?"

His eyes shinning like crystals is all it takes for you to smile genuinely. You loved Chenle's expressions and features. "Are you kidding me? You're gorgeous and incredibly beautiful. Just me being next to you makes me feel insecure by your beauty, every time you smile you make me question whether the sun is near- because you make me blush and make me feel hot and make me blind. Baby you're so much more than just the word hot, you're magnificent,"

Your smile revealing your faint dimples enlightens his mood and he carefully leans in and presses his lips on yours. You're attentive and equally press your lips against his. Chenle shyly backs away and timidly looks to his food carrying on eating while you do the same.

You guys were always afraid of displaying affection in front of people, afraid that they might tease or make fun of you both. However other times you couldn't help it.

For Donghyuck who was casually walking to the canteen with his friend pauses upon seeing you...and your boyfriend kiss. His face morphs in distaste. "What the fuck was that?" He questions being partly traumatized by that vanilla kiss. "And they're fucking blushing like kindergartens,"

"That's one hell of an awkward kiss." Jeno, Donghyuck's friend, chuckles before he nudges his friend. "Come on, let's go,"

Donghyuck shakes his head redirecting his feet. After what he witnessed he simply can't act like he never saw that. "No bro, I'll catch you later,"

"What?" Jeno's eyebrow raises when Donghyuck begins striding to the couple. "Man where are you going?"

Donghyuck rounds his finger signalling Jeno to go on without him. While he jogs up lightly the few steps, he doesn't pay mind to the girls that twiddle their fingers or try to get his attention. Because as he's making his way towards you, he knows in his mind that you're the chosen one.

Upon getting your CV, Donghyuck was not that much interested in you because of your boring, plain, devoted answers, and comments about your boyfriend here and there, so he ignored your CV rather then send an official rejection. It's been days, but yet upon witnessing that mediocre kiss and how you looked satisfied by it -perked up his interest slightly.

You really were innocent. And he wanted to change that, or rather ruin it. Perhaps he sees it as a challenge of trying to change a shy girl, but really the kiss your boyfriend gave you made Donghyuck want to please you. It was a crime for pretty girls to blush like kids. What you needed was to feel flattered non stop all day everyday. And if your boyfriend wouldn't do a good job then surely he'd step in.

Getting closer to you, his eyes are on your bare legs. Surely you had hypnotizing legs, he could make out some blemishes and bandages, but he loved how full they looked. You're wearing a dress but it ends on your thigh and Donghyuck takes advantage by coming up behind you placing his hands on your shoulders shaking you a little. You turn your head backwards taking notice of him. Your eyes widen when he taps your nose. "Hey babygirl,"

Both you and Chenle are frozen in shock. Chenle is shocked that a camboy he's been admiring is close by and you're shocked because of the name he calls you as well as how he slaps your thigh lightly watching it shake. He squats right before you with a smile.

"This your boyfriend?" Donghyuck peers at Chenle once before focusing back on you. Your features, your look of pure. You're too innocent for him and he finds it alluring. "I've got your underwear in my car. Come with me,"

He gets up after taking your hand in his. He gently pulls you close to him making you go down one step, before his head leans forward to check your backside and brushes your butt from where you were sitting. You're alarmed by having his hands tap and dust your butt- so stunned that you can't form words with your mouth.

Chenle too is left with his mouth agape as he watches Donghyuck pull you away. "She'll be back,"

Donghyuck, with little to no regard or respect for personal space or boundaries throws his arm around your shoulder.

"Alright babygirl, I'll be frank with you," Donghyuck starts while walking with you underneath his arm. "I rejected you because you weren't my type. But now, I want you. I think we can make something work. I'm thinking a rebranding of my page. You're not shabby looking and you've got goods in all the right places, so I'm seeing you as my innocent camgirl and in return I teach you what youwant to know, what do you think?"

Normally your mouth was a bit tongue tied when it came to talking to people, but you struggled with answering questions on the spot. Especially with this type of topic. Not only is it too much to process, but you don't understand to the fullest. "Hm?" You answer feeling dumb and wanting him to repeat himself.

Donghyuck only chortles but doesn't repeat himself. "Let's meet the gang first, and then we can see what to do,"

Again you don't know what to say, but when Donghyuck directs you to a place on campus grounds that you avoided with passion because of the types of people who'd loiter around there. The canteen. Your eyes widen when he pulls the glass door open and enters into the packed stations filled with students everywhere. He goes by a couple of groups nodding his head here and there as signs of greetings before he sprints up some stairs with you next to him.

"There you are," Jeno is the first to notice Donghyuck before the rest of his friends do.

Being seated on high stools by a rectangular table, you notice a total of 5 people all seated. There's drinks, bags, laptops and books on the table, but aside from the things on the table your face flushes completely when seeing all the faces of the men.

You notice one of them as the one who constantly pulls your dress over your head whenever he gets the chance. Jaemin.

And the rest of the guys you recognize them from the popular groups in the school. Two of them being the heartthrobs, frat boys Jaehyun and Mark. And the other guys, you don't know their names but you've seen them always around the popular guys.

"Guys, meet my rebranding camgirl," Donghyuck announces. His heat that's close to your back surprises you. His hands go either side of you before resting on the table trapping you in his arms. Your heart is pounding extremely fast and you have nowhere else to look except at the table when feeling all their stares on you.

"Fuck it's the girl with the granny panties," Your heart sinks when you hear Jaemin laugh. "You wanna make her your camgirl?"

"Donghyuck, this is what you went back for?" Jeno quizzes with his eyebrow up. "Really? You're gonna reject Crystal the pussy goddess for her?"

"She's good," You hear Donghyuck state. You can't see his face, but you can hear his playful smirk. "Hair, thighs, innocence. She's perfect for me to use. Like a fuckdoll."

Your ears are sharp to his words and you feel self conscious as he lists off your body parts like some items at an auction- as if he's selling you in a market.

"She looks timid," You glance up to one of the guy's who comments, Jaehyun. Your heart heaves in your chest. He's one of the seniors who studies construction.

"Exactly," Donghyuck's touch over your hips going down your thighs has your jolting slightly - making them snicker.

"She really squirmed by your touch, are you sure she's perfect?" Jeno questions with amusement while watching your nervous figure slightly quivering.

Donghyuck plants his hand on the top of your head running it down your soft hair. "Perfect for me because I can use this to my advantage. Innocent face brings money."

"I feel you," Mark smirks. "You wanna pollute her? That'll make good money and bring in a fresh audience for you."

One of the guys who hasn't spoken sighs and turns to you. "Did you agree to this whole claptrap?"

You're about to respond but unfortunately Donghyuck beats you to it. "Our agreement was that if she helps me I can help her bring something new to the table for her boyfriend. Renjun, you should've seen him, he's all squirmy and kissed her like it's a PG 8 movie. By the time I'm done with her, she'll be a freak. Her boyfriend will be satisfied to be dealing with a little girl who knows her shit. Don't you wanna be a freak babygirl?"

Your eyes lightly pop and just as you gasp in astonishment when he slaps your butt. The sound echo's around making the guys whistle. "Fuck, you should share her," You hear Jaehyun in between the other boys.

"Well I don't know about sharing, but this is my account on the line," Donghyuck states before pulling another stool. "Sit babygirl, Renjun what do you think? How can we market her?"

The guy who asked you if you agreed, types of on his laptop before turning to Donghyuck. "I'm not too thrilled with doing non consent marketing, but if she really wants we can make something work. At least it's not that old baggage anymore. My parents were beginning to wonder if I was sleeping with my grandma," The guy, Renjun grumbles before turning to you. "Are you in?"

You're sat uptight on the chair with eyes so large that it makes Donghyuck amorous and aroused. He couldn't already wait to use you and have you look at him with those eyes.

Hesitantly you nod your head and look down when hearing them howl and whistle again. Your neck and face is on fire just as your legs tightly shut. One comment throws you off guard but you try not to feel like a dirty cheater. "Wait you said she had a boyfriend? And she still wants to do this? With you?" Jeno shakes his head scoffing. "Not so innocent if you ask me,"

You haven't cheated yet, but the way they're discussing this like it's some big project has you feeling vulnerable and exposed. Even though the bell rings, you expect them to move but they're still in one place discussing how to use your image. Literally they create a whole report file for this new rebranding Donghyuck has in mind. They take in your information and Kink Factory account details and begin working. All of them.

Renjun types and creates strategies, while Mark gives 'scenarios' of what Donghyuck can do, with Jaemin adding in what types of kinks for Donghyuck to market and try out. As it's a whole 'new field' Jeno offers his expertise on how Donghyuck can use toys to bring up your best performances.

Meanwhile, your heart is hauls in your chest when you feel a stare coming from Jaehyun. One of the frat boys. He's eyes are scanning you up and down. Scanning you like meat ready to be eaten. Just as you think he won't make a move, he picks up a clipboard and pen.

"I'll measure her portions and cups," With Jaehyun getting off his chair and moving over to you, he lifts his hand waiting for you to take it. "Come on Princess,"

You're fragile when placing your hand in his large ones and get off your stool following him. You walk behind him while his hand holds onto yours as he leads you to some place. Going down the steps and walking past a few passages, you find him opening up a storage closet. He gets inside and you drag behind him being cautious.

Turning on the lights you see indeed that it's a storage closet with sets of mops and brooms and other cleaning machines sitting in the corner and there are shelves with cleaning products and racks of materials. Jaehyun locks the door and smiles when turning to you. "Alright let's check you out,"

You move back a bit when he steps forward. He halts when sensing that you're uneasy. "Don't worry, I'm just gonna check you out. I won't do anything you don't want me to do."

You don't know what to make of it. But you nod your head.

He takes out a tape measure and peers at you. "Stand against the wall,"

You follow and stand against the wall. Using one of the appliances on the shelves he places a straight ruler over your head before lining it off with a pencil. He's taller then you, so as he's up close to you measuring you, you can smell all of him in his mind capturing smell. After getting your height he measures it and then jots it down on the clip file.

He then cracks his knuckles surpassing his smile. "Ayt, the next part is a bit physical. I'll need you to stay still alright?"

You nod again.

Standing right in front of you. His large hands cup your cheeks. "Don't be nervous," He whispers. And carefully, his hands slide down to your neck and down lower.

Your chest rises and falls when his hands cup your boobs, and his hands lift up your slightly heavy boobs before squeezing them. Upon squeezing them a few more times, you're alert when his fingers slide up your shoulder handles and slide them down.

"Don't be nervous, I just wanna see how they look," he whispers. Your heart beats in your chest as the covering of your dress slowly falls and pools by your waist. Jaehyun's hands are skillful when removing your bra and tossing them aside. His eyes meet yours once before he smirks and his eyes go over your boobs. "They look good," His fingers play with your nipple by pinching them and pulling on them. He continues squeezing and lifting your breasts before he dips his head down and you shiver when his tongue swirls on your nipple.

You shudder as his other hand kneads on your other boob while he sucks and fills his entire mouth with your nipple. He moans and you shut your eyes in ecstasy laced in embarrassment. How are you letting this happen?

You don't know why, but it feels good and you can't help how little squeals leave your lips. That's music is Jaehyun's eyes as he peers up at you gladly before kissing up your chest and then he gets to your neck. You swear the moment his tongue circulates on your neck that your knees feel weak. His teeth sink into your neck as he plants sloppily and wet kisses tagged with bites that make you implore in pleasure. His tongue skillfully gnawing on that one spot that makes you fidget as you try to keep your eyes close by how good it feels.

Jaehyun parts from your neck and hums out. "Good," He picks up the file and ticks off some points writing down a few comments about your soft pleasing moans.

Then he picks up your bra and helps you put it on. You're even nervous when he helps put on your dress properly. Just as you think you're done, he kneels down on one knee and carefully his hands go up your thighs. Your legs feel tingles from his touch and you try to maintain your breath, only for it to be taken away again when he pulls his head underneath your dress. You cup your mouth trying to remain still as you feel his hands now pressing onto the flesh of your butt.

Jaehyun's hands knead on your ass as his nose basks in the scent of your wet underwear.

It takes just a moment for Jaehyun to pull your underwear down before his two fingers slide between your pussy lips. "You're a hairy little girl, it's been a while,"

You feel self conscious by his comment when his fingers continue to lubricate with your juicy juices. Already squirming and letting out tiny whimpers of pleasure, you're not expecting for his fingers to throttle right up your whole. But when it does you try to close your legs but Jaehyun's hand acts on it with a laugh and he tosses one of your leg above his shoulder to give him better access to your slippery wetness.

You're a trembling mess as the squelching sounds echo in the storage closet as well as your loud moans. "Mmmmh," You squeeze your eyes close trying to hold in your moans, but you can't help the sounds of bliss leaving you. You're in a euphoric state and on cloud 9 when Jaehyun adds in another finger stretching your walls to open up a little more.

How could this be so good? How could his fingers be more satisfying then Chenle's crotch? It shouldn't be possible but yet with the way your throat is jubilating in praises makes you wish for this to never end.

However when you legs start to tremble from the build up tagged together with the way Jaehyun moves his fingers in and out in a haste manner- you can't hold in any more of your sobs of pleasure as your hands finally grip onto his head underneath your dress as you push your pelvis more into his fingers- as you feel a wave of squirts shooting out of you.

Your legs can't stop shaking and your abdomen tightens in pleasure that you can't believe it.

Jaehyun gets out from underneath your dress with a face resembling surprise and perceiving in a cocky manner. You're too focused on the floor were your panty is being drenched by the wetness of the squirts that left you- that you don't notice Jaehyun placing his fingers in his mouth to taste you.

Despite smelling sweet, you taste a bit sour-yet Jaehyun wouldn't mind having to taste you. But considering it's his first time meeting you, he wouldn't want to risk anything, so as he licks his fingers clean and uses the hand sanitizer as well as a cloth to wipe his fingers, he ticks more on some boxes before bending down to pick up your underwear.

"I'm gonna keep this," He smiles and pats your back. "There's some tissues in the blue box. When you're done you can go back to your boyfriend, Donghyuck will send you a message,"

And with that he leaves you panting for air and marveling at the revelation that your body fluids just shot right out of you. That was the best experience you've ever had in under minutes and you're not even sure how you're able to stand. At the mere thought of standing, your legs give up on you and you fall to your knees panting out and shutting your eyes trying to relive the moment in your head.

"That was amazing," You breathe out while fixing your glasses.

Jaehyun goes back to his friends twirling your underwear on his index finger making Jaemin laugh. "Fuck they really are granny panties,"

"Thought I'd add this to my collection," Jaehyun states while taking a seat. "Smells amazing," Jaehyun tosses it in the air for Jaemin to grab.

Jaemin grabs onto it while stuffing his face on it. "Fuck, how does she taste,"

"Sour, but good," Jaehyun remarks. "Didn't get to eat her out. She got off from my fingers. Whoever her boyfriend is, he's never given it to her. She couldn't stop moaning,"

The boys read through the file that Jaehyun places on the table being amazed by how 'fresh', ‘untouched’ and ‘new’ you are. Mark reads through one of the tick boxes, 'Legs shake' and he turns to Donghyuck. "Did you know her legs shake?"

Donghyuck shakes his head reading through the messages on his phone from some of the thirsty girls who filled up his bank account. The only thoughts in his head is whether or not you could bring him enough money to pay off his debts.

"What made you even reject her?" Jeno asks.

"She has no personality," Donghyuck states. "But even with her legs shaking, she still has no personality, so we'll need things that'll make her pop. If we wanna grow her account to the same level as mine, she'd really need to have some kind of personality,"

"For what it's worth, her pussy is hairy." Jaehyun mentions. "Trimmed but hairy, and it looks fresh. She's never been used before. Her personality will be her pussy,"

-

20:00 pm.

You're finished submitting the last of your assignments months before the due date and rest back on your seat stretching your arms out. Today was a long and hectic day. You pick up your phone going into messenger. Chenle asked you to send him a text as soon as you finished. He sent the message around 2pm, but you know he's still waiting to talk to you. It almost like a night routine type of thing that you both did, if you did not sleep over at his house or he didn't sleep over at yours, then you'd engage by through text messages.

Surprisingly you chat with Chenle normally, talking about your assignments and his classes and everything else about you day except for the incident that happened between you and Donghyuck.

You take a breather, being relived that he doesn't bring it up...until he sends the message that's been on his mind: "Do you have time to talk about...something"

Thankfully just as the conversation is brought up, it's quickly dismissed and you feel relieved.

When you're done chatting with Chenle, you're about to go and sleep but then you hear your phone beeping nonstop. Picking it up, you're immediately taken aback by the number of notifications from Kink factory. Opening the app to make sure that you're not jinxing yourself, you see that indeed the notifications are for you indicating that you have some new followers.

[Jae_Peaches] followed you

[Sexy Sun] followed you

[xxxNanaxxx] followed you

[Nono] followed you

[Tongue in the game] followed you

[.R.] followed you

You recognize the first batch of people being from Donghyuck and his friend's group, but then there are 50 other new people who you're not familiar with and another batch of people you don't know. Curiously you peek into their accounts and are stunned that it's other hot males. You go through your profile again being in awe of the amount of new followers you have.

You and Chenle shared an account when watching pxrn from Kink Factory, and you both didn't pay mind to the profiles as you were only there to watch and not to engage. However when you created your own account you were left with 0 followers, but now all of a sudden, it's at a rocket high number of 153!

Innocent Baby Y/n

Following: 1 kink | Followers:153 kinkers

Subscribers: 6 | Cam Posts: 0 videos

You can't even comprehend how that is even possible. Not only do you have additional followers, but it seems that your page has been altered, because you don't remember placing a display photo or even any information on your account other than your name. But now, seeing your account, you're surprised by the alter ego personality from your account. Number one, the girl in the picture is not even you, or close to looking like you

You get an idea that perhaps it's Renjun or the group of guys who altered your account, otherwise it wouldn't be so pink and cute and colorful... No, it's certainly them who altered it.

* Bio: you don't even have to ask, the answer is always yes!💗

* Gender: 🤭female by day and kitten by night😺

* Interested in: filling all my wholes by a dominant male🤤

* Tip: i'm a shy innocent girl who loves sparkling things, cute things, delicious food. spoil me daddy, please🎀

* Kinks: breed me like your baby girl🥴i wanna be your baby so badly🥺

* Perks: i smell really good, and taste like pineapples- wouldn't you want to taste me🍍

* Earnings: i'm your cute and cheap little slut

→ ¥30 per night💲

Your hands hold onto your cozy and fluffy pajama pants as you read your about page. They've made you sound as though you're a horny child. A child who's lost their father and is in search for a new father.

Before you can further wrap your head around the situation you get a message.

Sexy Sun: Babygirl send me your address, I'm coming over

Your eyes enlarge as you reread over the message several of times.

What did you sign yourself into? Exactly what did you 'accept' for him to be all over your personal life almost invading it? You only gave your underwear and potentially your entire sex life, but this all feels too much. You get another message from him, saying how he doesn't like to be kept waiting.

Afraid of making him upset, you send your address and dorm number.

Sexy Sun: Oh you live in the college dorms? I'll be right over

Your eyes travel around your room, which is already clean and tidy and you wonder if you should prepare for him to come. Getting off your bed, you make your way to the bathroom and brush your hair, washing your face from the face mask you put over- before placing your glasses back on your face. Just as you're about to change your pajama's to normal clothes, you hear your door bell ringing.

Being reminded of how he doesn't like to wait, you quickly move over to the door and unlock it.

Donghyuck dressed in all black as usual, with that same leather jacket has his head down while holding onto a bag. You notice there's a cigarette bud dangling from the side of his lip. His head slowly moves up your figure, eyeing down your pants and grey sweat shirt. His eyes land on your pure and sinless eyes and he hums out. You're pretty. He tilts his head to the side giving you a little smile. "You weren't sleeping were you? It's work time,"

"Oh," You say with no courage, lacking your soul as your eyes light enlarge. "We start now?"

Donghyuck gently moves past your frame by the door and enters your dorm. He removes his shoes revealing his black socks and causally walks around. You hold in your breath when getting a whiff of his cigarette which smells so strong like caffeine Tabaco. He exhales and very soon once you close the door locking it, you feel congested by the scent and feeling almost frightened by his big large height in your room. You stand behind him as he moves around. "Your parents must be rich, you got the expensive suite. Indoor bathroom, living room and bedroom, wow, even a kitchen. I bet it even has an amazing balcony view." Donghyuck hums out impressed.

You don't know what to do as you follow behind him as he moves along the living room and to your room. The smell of his cigarette has you wishing it doesn't remain when he leaves- but it's too strong for you that you doubt even when he leaves it'll still be smelling.

As he anticipated, your room is just as minimalistic as your personality. It's in it's standard beige color and dull white colors of innocence. Damn you were an open book. Getting in your room, Donghyuck drops his bag on the ground while moving to the curtains which spread over two walls. He spreads them open and he feels relieved that there's some form of 'something' in your room. You lack vision and Donghyuck can't stand looking at the blank walls.

Even your study area is clear of any clutter. It's as though you're going to leave the building the next day, there's nothing around your room that screams any personality. Aside from the sensual and explicit outside night view, there's nothing else to look at in your room.

"This view is perfect," Donghyuck slides open a window letting the smoke air out. He turns back to you, watching you stand awkwardly in the middle of the room with your eyes on the white carpet. You had a long way to go if you had to take on the position to be his cam girl.

He'd need to change your style, give you some form of life that you could maintain and live up to, give you a personality and make you something...someone. Because as much as the shy girl innocent babe concept would take him far- he couldn't imagine spending a month with you and you had no flavor and were just dry.

He liked girls that were all over the place, he loved the wild fierce girls that surprised him every once in a while and he embraced those girls with open arms.

You needed to be up to his liking if he was going to take you far.

He moves over to his bag on the ground and splatters out all the things that were in his bag.

"Tonight, by your permission we can do something light. Kind of like an introduction and testing the waters with your appearance. The nice thing about your appearance has to be your glasses. They're not too small or too big, the fit perfectly on your face and enhance the mystical view of your eyes. Anyway, let me get these out,"

On the bed amongst the different colored teddy bears camera's and tripods and speakers, you're surprised to see baby blue lingerie as well as vibrators, dildo's, belts, collars, pacifier etc. that are used on pxrn movies. There's different types of them. "A-are you gonna use these? On me?" You timidly ask as you turn to him.

Donghyuck is too busy looking for an outlet to plug in his miniature speakers. Upon connecting them and setting up his phone, he moves over to the bed and takes a seat while picking up the camera and tripod. He nods his head in answering you. "In your cv you mentioned you're not comfortable with revealing parts of your body, so tonight we won't go too extreme. I wanna angle the camera in a way that it's mainly focused on your tits. Tonight, I'll only play with your tits. You good with that?"

Your lips are pressed tightly together but you find a way to nod your head despite not really digesting everything he said. Did he just mention tits? Aside from that you notice how much Donghyuck is different from when he is with his friends. He's more toned down instead of being bright and upbeat, he looks tired and worn out, but yet he's still willing to go this far with you, and if you dare even say he looks stressed- instead of looking relxd like he id with his friends...

"Be a doll and put this on," He navigates his eyes towards the lingerie. "Just wear it inside and then put back your pajama pants and top,"

You nod your head and pick up the garments that barely hide anything and are see through.

Donghyuck upon setting up the camera opens up his laptop and connects his charger as well as long USB cord to the camera. It begins showing the camera feed on his monitor screen and Donghyuck instantly logs into his account. He goes to create and as the camera switches on to the room, Donghyuck nods his head dragging in another whiff of smoke and opens another window opening a face time with Renjun. "Bro,"

"Damn, you were spot on." Renjun mutters. "Her room is bright."

"It's just walls and a bed and a table." Donghyuck mumbles and moves back placing his cigarette behind his ear. "Okay, how am I doing this?"

Renjun from his side takes a look at the room. "Give me a 360 view of the room,"

Donghyuck picks up the tripod turning around fully. "There's a full white wall of nothing and I think it irritates me more than anything,"

"Ditto," Renjun hums. "That background of the open curtains is really good. Try making it full, enhance the frame to focus on the both of you, yet the background should be highlighted as well.

Donghyuck after setting the camera in direct line with the bed and background moves to his laptop and adjusts the contrasts and saturation.

"That looks good," Renjun comments. "What deco did you bring?"

"Teddy bears and some dildos," That makes Renjun faintly laugh. Renjun was the type of person who hardly laughed at things, so hearing him laugh makes Donghyuck's ear perk up. "What's funny?"

"How'd she react to the dildos?"

"She asked if I'd use it on her," Donghyuck remarks while taking the teddy bears and placing them in the background. "Should I use it on her?"

Renjun shakes his head leaning back. "Jaehyun said she couldn't even handle his fingers, how would she even be able to handle your dildos. Play it cool Sunshine, it's just a showcase,"

Donghyuck sighs. "I can't afford for my subscribers, ratings and tips to go down. This needs to be the best showcase. I need the money,"

"You're all business talk, try not to get in your own head and enjoy the experience." Donghyuck hears Jaemin over Renjun's laptop. "I can't wait for it to start, I'll be tuning in. Make sure to make her squirt, Jaehyun said-"

Donghyuck rolls his eyes. "As if I'd need to learn how to pleasure a girl from you or Jaehyun. Let me remind you who's-"

"Ego aside, please don't get in your own head. Connect with her, and keep eye contact," Renjun interrupts before turning to his roommate. "Zip your mouth,"

Donghyuck continues enlightening your room trying to make it look minimalistic yet effortlessly girly. He did some research on girly rooms, and it seems the heart of all girly rooms was a light pink, white and brown teddy bear with hearts in their stomachs.

Thankfully the decorations of teddy's and dildos sit in well within the background of the night view. Donghyuck moves to the light switch wanting to turn the lights off, but when he sees there's a knob to dim the lights, he feels extremely glad. "Renjun check this out,"

Donghyuck dims the lights completely until their off before he brings back the light seeing that it can still go brighter. "Make the room dark," Renjun comments. "It makes the night city look hella fire,"

Donghyuck does as told before moving to the laptop and adjusting it. Still waiting on you, he moves to the closet hoping to find your wardrobe. He was hoping to find- perfect.

Meanwhile, you walk out your bathroom and into your room in the same clothes. Your eyes scan the area and you feel eager by the new decorations. There are multiples of teddy bears with different sizes all on your bed, which create a perfect little world and setting for a helpless baby little girl.

Upon your arrival Donghyuck digs through his leather jacket before handing you a white blindfold and pink mask. You take the blindfold and mask in your hands looking at them curiously. "There's nothing much I can do for your face not to be revealed, so it's either you block out your eyes or you cover you mouth. Blocking your eyes would mean ditching your glasses. I prefer you to cover your mouth, 'cause your eyes are a whole key." Donghyuck suggests whilst thinking of what Jaehyun said. Jaehyun loved how your eyes instantly gave away how much you loved it.

If Donghyuck was going to use you, he needed to utilize you to the fullest, from head to toe he needed to discover all your perky traits and milk them out.

You already had the looks, all that was left was some personality enhancement.

Taking Donghyuck's advise you take the pink girly looking mask and cover your mouth with it. "Alright babygirl, I need you on the bed,"

As you direct your steps towards the bed, Donghyuck's eyes are on his screen. The view is perfect, you look perfect in your pajama's and the cam is set.

"Wait, let's change your shirt," Donghyuck mumbles while turning around. "Where is your wardrobe? I'll look through it,"

You point it out to him. When reaching your wardrobe he already has a brief idea of what he'll see and how your clothes will be. He's not even fazed when he opens the wardrobe and sees your clothes the way he envisioned it. Dresses on one side of the hangers and jackets on the other and below inside different square spaces are organized collections of your shorts, shirts, buttoned shirts, trouser, long sleeves, skirts- heck you even have labels underneath each row.

He goes straight for the shirts and brings them all out. You get fazed by this as you watch him squat down while looking through the different shirts on the ground. He doesn't even bother fixing them as he picks out one white shirt that's both soft and has a silk element and walks to you.

"Put this on, it's material is satin" Donghyuck hands it to you while sitting down next to you on the bed. "The fabric feels cool and smooth against the skin, which can help regulate body temperature and provide a comfort when having sex,"

He bounces on the bed a bit unbothered by your cheeks that heavily blush. Sensing your hesitancy and sudden stiffness, Donghyuck turns to you. You look nervous, and presumably shy to change.

His hand goes behind your back and caresses it causing your back to automatically arches straighter within his touch. "I know it's your first time babygirl, but I need you to try and get used to this. I teach you sex to my thousands of subscribers and in your favor you go and use the skills and techniques you've learnt on your boyfriend."

It's all too fast, you wanna say. But just hearing his words makes you realize the seriousness of what you signed up for. Him already touching you, and a camera already watching you just reveals how much of a heavy deal and bargain this is. This is cheating to it's finest.

When you don't say anything, Donghyuck's hands have a mind of their own as he scouts too close to you and his hand rounds your waist just as the other holds onto the fabric of your night shirt. His other hands gets a hold too and your heart beats faster by how slowly he's pulling the material up. "Relax and let me take care of you babygirl," He whispers.

Your heart caves in your chest when looking into his eyes as he continues to remove your shirt. Upon getting the sweat shirt off, Donghyuck's eyes instantly latch on your full boobs in the baby blue see through bra that had some white flower designs.

"Fuck, so big," Instead of Donghyuck voicing out the words, your ears perk up when hearing it from some place. Turning your head to the side you notice a laptop. Its opened on two windows, but on the other window you make out two people. Renjun and Jaemin. The words coming out from Jaemin.

Your hands go up to shield yourself as you realize they can probably see you because of the tripod camera that's right in front of your bed. But before your hands can do anything Donghyuck already has them going into the satin shirt. He drags it gently over your body and you try to calm down when he gets up and moves to the laptop. "See you when I get back,"

"We'll be watching," Donghyuck hears Jaemin enthusiastically squeal like a little girl. Donghyuck doesn't respond but closes his face time. He joins in your account (which he recently followed) and sets a 10 minute count down alerting his users and subscribers. He switches on the speaker and syncs it to his laptop 'cutesy s3x pl4ylist'.

He then removes his leather jacket leaving it on the table. Taking the cigarette from behind his ear and inhaling sharply into it while moving to the camera, he takes a stance and simply watches you from the camera angle. "I made a little cute playlist for you." He says as soon as the low music plays in the background. "Lets do this."

Something shifts inside of him. His camera alter ego taps into him as he stares you down like a prey he's ready to tarnish. With your mouth covered by your mask and your eyes purely anticipating and fearfully awaiting him, has him smoking the last of his cigarette before stubbing it out with his fingers and moving to the bed. He gets on the bed but instead of sitting next to you he moves behind you- draping his legs over on each side of you trapping you inside him. He knows he has to take it slow, but just the moment your body heats up his front it brings out his whole alter ego.

You get a whiff of the awful cigarette scent but fix your face when his breath brushes against your earlobe. He hums out and allows his hands to rest on your thighs gently rubbing it up and down. "I'm a performer when the camera lights turn red. For tonight, I want you to relax and allow me to take care of you. No talking, no fear. Just desire, lust and thirst. Feel me," He whispers slowly and faintly.

His hands already rubbing in a slow manner up and down your thighs. He spreads his legs just as his hands part your thighs and in the same motion his palms go up your thighs and over your clothed heat before going down again. His nose begins smelling down your neck as his lips kiss your shoulders.

Your breathing is steady and your eyes are shut as you bask in him. You tilt your head to the side as soon as his lips meet your neck. Your breath hitches when he licks up your neck and plants light kisses against your jaw. You hum in satisfaction just as his hands place themselves on your breasts squeezing them.

"Feel me." He repeats his words as he rubs your breasts. A soft moan escapes you when his other hand goes lower pressing into your core. "Let me feel you." He says once more. You're sure that if your heart was still beating you'd be dead right now from all the adrenaline rushing through your veins as you try to compose and conceal your emotions.

Donghyuck, aware of this, can feel you trembling and tingling underneath his touch. He sucks gently on your neck eliciting a shudder of pleasure from you. His tongue flicks over the skin there and he pulls away leaving wet marks where his saliva is lingering. Your eyes snap open catching his lips in a sly smile. Without warning, he leans forward sliding your mask down and pressing his lips firmly against yours - and boy are you exotic to his lips. You've never been kissed like this before - with such passion, lust, desperation. This is something different. Something hot, intense and dangerous. You gasp when he pushes harder against your lips deepening the kiss. Your hands which have timidly been on his thigh squeeze him as you lean in more for the kiss.

His lips are so hot and gentle. They make you want more and you want more and he knows it and he lets you. As long as you were enjoying yourself he didn't mind indulging you as much as possible. The only thing that mattered right now was the number of views and tips he kept hearing in between the beats of the song. Seems like his audience were enjoying the show. His fingers move under the elastic of your pajama pants and he skids his fingers past your underwear and over your wet moisturized heat.

You breathe out in ecstasy just by the feel of his fingers driving circular motions around your clit, rubbing and swirling around- you arch your back from him lightly. But at the exact same time you want the most and need to feel his lips again. You pull back from the kiss panting as you stare up at him. Yet he dives back for your lips as his other hand slides underneath your shirt squeezing your boob.

Meanwhile the comment section is wilding out in praises just as the tips keep coming in.

Comments:

-now that's what I'm talking about, a cute little girl with the body of a woman! shit take off her top *sends 100pts

-show us her tits! i'm dying over her man

-is that our new baby? damn look at her hands on his thighs🤤🤤damn she's shy fuck her already *sends 50pts

-boobs???? are so much better then Cammy's old saggy boobs

-*sends 1000pts

-that view is to die for *sends 8pts

-nice girl👅

-damn she's shaking look at her legs! *sends 300pts

And just like the comments fire up so are your legs when shaking. You don't know how he does it but when his fingers continuously rub on your clit in a fast motion, you feel your knob tingling and swelling up. Your moans start growing louder as you can't contain yourself anymore. Through the kiss, Donghyuck can hear just how heavy you're breathing and how much you're enjoying it. He bites onto your lip inserting his tongue and allowing it to collide with yours.

Being hit with so many factors you're not too sure what you should focus on as you feel an overdose of pleasure wash over you just as your braincells tighten and you yelp out of Donghyuck's kiss when feeling your hips buck higher and twitch. Donghyuck licks his lips panting out when rubbing your knob with excessive speed feeling his fingers and hands being met with so much spritz of your cum. Donghyuck chuckles lowly just as he feels your pajama pants getting wet and the sounds of the tips ringing nonstop. Donghyuck colides his lips with yours again, not giving you time to fully digest that you just had an orgasm.

He doesn't break from the kiss and he doesn't stop when hearing your whimper by the lack of his touch on your pussy. His fingers slide out of your pajama pants being wet. Leaving your boob his hands begin to pull down your pajama pants. Without stopping the kiss Donghyuck helps you shift your butt up as he begins removing your pants.

He's so skillful that he doesn't once stop the kiss nor open his eyes as he helps your legs slide out your pants. You're so wet. Your pants are drenched and the leaking is still going down your legs as patches of wet and whites cloud your underwear. "Such a milky little girl, you liked that didn't you," Donghyuck mouths in between the kiss.

You on the other hand are breathing in and out of the kiss getting lost of air but at the same time your nerves get the best of you by him removing your pants and exposing your legs and underwear.

When your pants are off, his hands slide up your waist now bringing your top over. It disrupts the kiss just a little, but within those few seconds you moan just as Donghyuck whispers in a husky tone. "Focus on me okay babygirl," His lips dive straight into yours as he leaves your body exposed in that fine baby blue lingerie. His hands roam your body now pressing his hands all over your flesh. Gripping your skin, chunks of your thighs, squeezing and grabbing your crotch. You're a whimpering mess with your eyes closed as you try to focus on the kiss but your mind is just too foggy with lust to register anything else right now. Clouded with thoughts of the sensation his hands have on your naked flesh.

With one hand now gripping your breast while your other hand grabs his hair, his teeth nip playfully at your earlobe while you're biting back moans. His fingers back inside your underwear continuing the motion.

Your trembling moan is the result of Donghyuck rubbing on your sensitive clit again. Your legs try to close shut, but he drapes his leg over yours and opens your leg up wider. "Show them how wet you are, they love this," He lets go of your lips and begins sucking on your earlobe as his other hand pulls down your bra and exposes your nipple. All shame leaves your body as you're too focused and indulged into it that you find it so hard to pay attention to anything else.

Trapped in Donghyuck's touch, your head thrusts to the side as your eyes roll being pleasured beyond comparison. You don't know why you were against this, this is amazing.

You don't even have control anymore as your vocal cords voice out your moans of pleasure and you are jubilated in lust.

Donghyuck's eyes peer for a little to your fazed out expressions and he thinks back to what Jaehyun said- how your pussy is your personality. Pressing more into your pussy and seeing how you shake severly before your hips buck again forward, Donghyuck holds onto your abdomen with his other hand keeping you against him as he feels your quivering state. You try to close your legs but Donghyuck has them tightly locked underneath his own leg, but he does allow you to drag out your high in bliss and joy.

Your breathless pants are cute, your gasping pants are soft the same way a baby coo's peacefully after suckling on her mothers milky nipple. He pats your pussy lightly giving you praises of how you were such a good baby for him.

You try to hear your own voice over the loud pounding of your heart. You blink your eyes several times trying to bring yourself out of the hazy and distorted daze you were in. Donghyuck places a kiss on your cheek and pats your mouth before plunging in his fingers in your mouth. "Suck on it and tell me how you taste,"

You suck on his four fingers in your mouth, your tongue gliding over them. You didn't think it was true, but you sorta tasted like pineapple but a more sour kind. Donghyuck's lips are slightly parted as you look at him feeling shy all over again.

You're not aware that the camera's lights stopped blinking- but you do notice that the music stops and just like that Donghyuck slips his fingers out your mouth.

"That was better then expected." He rolls over off the bed going straight for his laptop.

You're left in heat. All shame returns when you look at how much of a mess you've made. From white juices' dripping from your covered core, to watery cum being on your titled floor as well as your carpet- and not to mention your pajama's that are tossed aside looking like you just peed yourself. It's a mess. You fix the bra strap back over your shoulder and put back the shirt over your body. You feel ashamed the moment your senses return. You were like a hooligan.

Just as your eyes go over to Donghyuck, you notice how he's lighting up another cigarette and starts smoking while sitting on your chair typing rapidly on his laptop. You can hear your voice moaning and it dawns on you that he's watching the video of you.... You're too deep in your thoughts of shame and belittlement that you don't hear when he calls you.

"Damn babygirl, you were perfect," He mutters looking at all the pts tips that entered. "We got up to 38,893 tips. Converting this to cash will pay all my expenses. I could share with you if you want,"

Donghyuck's ears met with silence after he voices out his thoughts. When not hearing you, he turns his head to you.

"Yho, babygirl you good?"

"Hm?" You break out of your thoughts and look up to him. Your hands are on the edges of your shirt. "Tips? W-was it filming? You mean to tell me I exposed myself on camera while you fingered me and showed my breasts?" You don't know whether it comes out sounding conflicted or stressed, but when the words leave your mouth Donghyuck lays his laptop down.

He nods his head, trying to appear calm despite the joy spreading all over his body- he senses that you're no longer in the same blissful high and joyous mood you were in 3 minutes ago. But what can he say, his pts tips with you have risen from his usual 25,000 tips to over 35,000 going to 38,893 tips! That was impeccable. You didn't seem so boring anymore, knowing the power of your pussy is what got him on this high level- and actually happy. But seeing you not so happy, makes him 'try' to empathize. He can't lose you, you're a prized possession now. "You're not happy?"

Your lips are dry, but you remove the mask from your face. "I didn't even know it was recording,"

"That's a good thing that you didn't pay mind to it-"

You don't mean to interrupt, but you interrupt. "I was naked on camera and the mask that was supposed to cover my face was down on my chin."

Hearing you subtly complain is interesting to Donghyuck. You looked so helpless. "I doubt anyone saw your face-"

"Oh my god I was naked on camera." You cover your face with your hands as your thoughts take away the pleasure you felt. "What if my boyfriend-"

Donghyuck lowly curses and comes over to you on the bed. "Hey baby look," Donghyuck licks his lips. "I kept my word and said we'd do something light. With the lights dimmed and your face bashed up against my own as we kissed, I doubt anyone could make out your face. But if it really upsets you, I'm sorry and I'll try my best next time to not get carried away. You just looked so good I had to kiss you, you're lips are all swollen now,"

Donghyuck's hands hold onto your wrists bringing them down. His thumb rubs over your lips and he displays a little smile.

"You didn't like kissing me?" He asks while searching through your eyes. He watches as your face turns a light shade. "You were a really good kisser, and I bet if you kiss your boyfriend like you kissed me, and tell him how to touch you the way I touched you, he'd be pleased at your private lessons with me,"

You huff out quietly and peek up into his eyes before looking down again. "I know I agreed to this, but..."

"But?"

"I've never..." You take a deep breath and try to express yourself without fear. "I'm new to all this. My boyfriend usually asks me before he does something, he prepares me of what he's going to do. You just kissed me and touched me and took off my clothes and made my body feel..."

"Good?"

You sigh feeling your cheeks now glowing. You shyly keep your head down. "Okay, it felt g-g-good but..." You don't know how to express it.

How to express how overwhelmed it all feels. Hours ago, they were writing down this whole report case and just before you know it he's knocking down on your door and you're rubbed off by him on camera. You felt that it was all to fast.

Donghyuck's not dumb, in fact he can understand your unsaid words. "When I asked for your panties in class, you gave them too me willingly. I don't know if you took the money that I left on the desk, but that was me being respectful by paying for your underwear. I've been told I'm a bit unorthodox, so it may come as a surprise to you, but I started this channel fucking old ladies for money. The older the lady, the more money from house wives. Some of these ladies had husbands, others were as old as my mother, and few had grandkids already. What you're feeling, is something I felt when starting off, it's even something the old ladies I fucked were feeling- wondering if we're insane for having sex on a camera. You submitted your CV with requests of satisfying your life with your boyfriend. I'm in need of a cam girl to replace one of my old cam girls, she got married again for the fourth time and wanted to settle down with the dude- anyway back to the point. Choosing you as my cam girl required me to have a rebrand with someone my age. Perhaps this was a bit escalated, but I wanted you to get used to the field already before we go any deeper. Just like I took your underwear and gave you money, what we have between us is purely transactional."

For some reason, it hurts when he says it like that, but it's true. You did sign yourself up for him.

"I give you pleasure and you give me your body. Keep in mind that I'm not trying to destroy you and your boyfriend's relationship, I'm simply benefitting from this new rebrand. As much as I'm taking advantage of you, you need to take advantage of me too. I don't care shit about your boyfriend when I'm fucking you, or having my fingers deep in you. And neither should you care." He remarks. "We don't have to meet up every night, but once in a while when we meet up we know it's business and nothing deep. It's considered cheating for you, but in my world it's just sex. No attachments, no strings, no feelings, just give and take. If anything I'm just here for the money."

"So it doesn't bother you that people are watching?"

"I know it feels heavy first time, but something I do is just to already start making out with you, that way when the camera actually starts filming I won't have to greet the audience and what not. They're just there to watch us. They could care less about what we do outside of this. So no, it doesn't bother me. But if it bothers you, trust me when I say I won't make it as awkward and bothering for you. Just tell me what you don't like and I'll work on it. With that, I apologize for allowing a portion of your face to be seen. For what it's worth, my cam only lasts 15 minutes, a total of 5 songs then it's done. So you won't have to bear being fucked for crazy hours."

He seems nonchalant throughout his whole speech and it's almost scary for you, how nothing he said triggered any emotion in him. He said it's just sex and that people don't care. It makes you feel so dirty and raw, because in your world, it's sacred and traditional. "So... Will you come tomorrow again?"

With that he gets up and begins packing up his things. "If you want me to, you can send me a text. If you're not interested, I get it."

All you can do is watch Donghyuck smoke and pack up all his things. He doesn't say anything else, he doesn't even say bye before leaving your room walking out the main door.

You tell yourself, that you never ever want to experience that again. So when he leaves you find yourself deleting the app Kink Factory. Whatever that shit was, will not happen again.

-

"Dude it's been on the top 5, shifting between 2, 3 and 1 for fucking 4 good fucking days now," Jaemin exaggerates while holding up 4 fingers. "And you're telling me you're looking for another cam girl? He has to be fucking crazy right?"

Jaehyun who's in the process of modelling his 3D cardboard house looks up to Jaemin and then to Donghyuck. Donghyuck is writing down some notes and eating on his own mixed fruit salad. "Ayo Sunshine, are you gonna say anything?"

"What's there to say?" Instead of Donghyuck answering, it's Renjun that answers as he types away on his laptop. "If the girl doesn't want, she doesn't want. We can't force her."

"What bull," Jaehyun rolls his eyes putting on his magnifying glasses to seal some glue on cardboard. "She got cold feet or what?"

"Then she shouldn't have agreed in the first place," Jaemin complains. "This is why I always say we need contracts. Once you sign that paper the deal can never be undone. Fucking bitch."

"Ey," Donghyuck looks up trying to hide his amusement. "Don't be bitter Jaem. She's not used to this and I don't wanna force her."

"You don't wanna-" Jaemin stops himself smacking his head in frustration. "Are you hearing yourself? This is the moment that we-"

"Jaemin." Donghyuck sets his pen down peeking at Jaemin. He understood the frustration coming from his friend, but he also didn't care as much. "I'm not gonna lie, pleasing her felt ten times better then being balls deep in her. Her body is like a machine, you hold it the right way and you can feel it turn on. She's soft but so fragile,"

"We could tell," Jaehyun mumbles focusing on pressing the cardboard onto its place. "Her eyes dude, they were in circles-"

"Forget that, her legs...no that pelvis had a life of its own," Jaemin chuckles recalling watching how your pussy kept swallowing Donghyuck's fingers whole. "She-" Jaemin stuffs his face in his hands mentally dying in lust. "Fuck. You can't control shit like that. Those legs started shaking on their own and her body, damn Donghyuck. Did it not occur to you that I used to flash her skirt up high just to laugh at her granny panties? Now I'm feeling so hard thinking about her granny panties-" Jaemin grunts. "Dude just get her back."

"No." Donghyuck shakes his head getting back to his work. While Jaemin and Jaehyun lament over what could've been on you- Renjun takes notice of how Donghyuck smirks secretly before eating on his fruits.

Normally Donghyuck never got in predicaments like these, but seeing as he did and he wasn't looking fazed only made Renjun suspicious. Knowing his friend for more than 5 years, he knew that Donghyuck was a mastermind manipulator who always had plans up his sleeves. If you weren't agreeing to work with him, Renjun just wonders exactly how Donghyuck would get you back.

Because the smirk emitting from his lips only proved to Renjun that Donghyuck had something up his sleeves.

The talks of you dial down as Mark and Jeno finally join the group after coming out of their afternoon class. "Have you guys been waiting here for a while?"

"Almost 3 hours." Jaemin whines. "What took you guys so long? I thought you went there to submit your work,"

"We did," Mark runs his hand through his hair. "We got held back because Jeno here wanted extra credits. Anyway, are we gonna go or are you guys just gonna sit around,"

"Man I'm beat," Jeno groans when checking the time seeing it's 17h00 pm. "I'm never going to submit late ever again."

While Jeno begins walking out the canteen trying to be ahead of his group of friends so that he can reach their shared dorm apartment...or rather flophouse- you and your boyfriend Chenle are in the comforts of your room.

Chenle initiates a kiss. The kiss you're expecting is something that makes you feel alive. Yet when Chenle has his hand gently underneath your jaw laying simple pecks over your lips in a rhythmatic pattern, your mind is brought back to reality to how Chenle normally kisses.

He was…is the soft type. So he'd never do anything against your will.

Your lips are agitated and you have to hold yourself back from trying to pick up the pace a little. You try to think how the kiss from Donghyuck began. How from one second it went from just a kiss to making you feel like you were experiencing a kiss from out of this world. Unlike Donghyuck, who's kiss was demanding, commanding and eager, Chenle's kisses were soft and sweet as cotton candy. If you had to describe it (and being truthfully honest to yourself), Chenle's kiss wasn't intoxicating and full of fire like Donghyuck's kiss- whereby your whole mind was foggy and blurred. But instead, Chenle had the most softest lips ever and when kissing against yours, you felt bad that you could only think about Donghyuck and how mind wrecking his kiss was.

You have to snap yourself back to the present moment instead of allowing your mind to drift into space while you think of another guy instead of your boyfriend. But you can't help but think how much potential Chenle has when kissing you. He could be like Donghyuck too… if he just worked on some things, maybe you would feel turned on by the kiss.

Your heart heaves in your chest, when he stops the kiss and like usual looks at you with excited eyes. "Is that okay?"

You nod your head humming out happily. "That was good. Uh, baby can you just… like…not tell me what you want to do to my body? Can you just do what you want, without asking me permission?" You ask as gently as possibly.

Chenle's head tilts to the side while he tries to take in your words. "Oh. You don't want me to ask permission? But what if you're not comfortable?"

Uncomfortable is what you felt in the beginning with Donghyuck but then it turned to a mind blowing experiment. "It's okay," You nod your head. Eagerly watching him to see what he'll do.

He slowly nods his head. You try to be hopeful that tonight's session will be a bit different from yesterday.

So yesterday you had sex again with Chenle, but the results where him combusting very easily again while barely being in you. You didn't like that you don't know what Donghyuck did exactly to get you in that state. You were barely conscious and your whole mind was numb as you only focused on the pleasure Donghyuck brought upon you. You wanted for Chenle to do what Donghyuck did to you too. But you don't know what Donghyuck did.

The best thing you can do, is tell your boyfriend Chenle to do what he wants without constantly asking you if this or that was okay. You just wanted him to do it.

You lean your body back when Chenle drapes his legs over your body. His hands boldly resting on either side of your waist as he leans down to your face, pressing his forehead against yours. You can see the way his pupils dilate. "Are you sure?"

You nod, closing your eyes so you don't let tears leak from them. "Yup."

"Okay…"

When you open your eyes again, you watch how Chenle licks his lips. "I've always wanted to do this ever since I saw Sexy Sun do this. Stop me if you don't like it, 'kay?"

"Mhm," You nod, bracing yourself for what he's always wanted to do. Pressing his lips onto yours, his tongue slides along the your mouth. It takes you some moments to realize what he said, but you close your eyes again and let yourself feel how wonderful his tongue feels sliding around yours. His tongue just slithers around. Feeling his tongue on yours, you can't help but swirl yours equally around his tongue. You moan and encourage him. "Good,"

Chenle takes it a step further and hesitantly places his hand on your exposed thigh. HIs hand roams around your thigh before going up along the smoothness of your leg and your legs part lightly. You feel his touch against your panties and gasp into the kiss.

Chenle's fingers rub over your panty lightly. Although it wasn't wet before by his dry kiss, you can feel yourself slowly being aroused by his fingers. As he continues his exploration of your womanhood, his fingers start to rub across the sensitive spot which earns another moan from you.

It's not as deep as Donghyuck's fingers and how they never stopped, but you don't mind. You rock your hips into his hand while you continue kissing him. This time you understand that Donghyuck basically had his way with you by stimulating different parts of your body at once.

Chenle too starts moaning into the kiss. Reeling your body up, and his fingers slightly getting deeper and more into your wet exposed underwear, you buck your hips while your hand holds onto his arms just as your legs slowly start o shake from the pleasurable sensations. Your thighs tremble under his fingers. "Chenle…" You breathe out softly when feeling you're about to cum.

You let out a loud breath of pleasure as he pulls away. Although you didn't squirt, just by feeling the sudden impact made you feel really good. "Was that okay?"

You nod, your breathing heavy. "Yeah." You swallow with excitement in your eyes. "That was really good baby,"

He smiles, kissing you one more time before adjusting his position and helping you remove your underwear just as he pulls down his own boxers. He aligns his member in the entrance of your whole. And just as much as you anticipate something better, your excitement is short lived when he barely places his member into your womanhood. And just like all the other times, you feel like you're cock holding for him again.

He somehow gets off to that and moans out after several minutes of humping 'in and out' of you. You fake your moan and just before you know it, he looks truly pleased with himself. He throws the condom in the nearest bin and lays together with you on the bed after both cleaning up. Chenle helps to clean you up, just as you clean him up.

It's when you lay together in bed, with you laying your bac against his chest and him hugging your waist. You suddenly remember his words and wonder which Kinker taught him that. "So where did you learn that move from?"

"Sexy Sun," Chenle smiles lightly, his eyes are closed, but he manages to kiss the top of your head. "So apparently Sexy Sun came out with a new live video and ever since he reposted it, it's been trending on Kink Factory for a while now. I mean, I can't see the trending video, because for some reason I'm not allowed to view it. But either way, I saw someone else leaked a snippet of it. So he's pleasing this girl and…" Chenle gulps and clears his throat. He always felt awkward talking to you about other girls bodies. But at the same time how could he talk to you about Sexy Sun without mentioning that the part he saw was how Sexy Sun made this mysterious girl squirt out soo much. She was so fucking good to look at and Chenle liked seeing how Donghyuck pleased her…he wished he could do the same for you.

While Chenle stops himself from describing how desireable the girl was, you on the other hand feel heavy in your heart. Your tongue feels so thick that it can't move.

Trending? Kink factory? Sexy Sun? Pleasing a girl?

Could that girl be you?

No. No way. You left him days ago and never logged onto Kink Factory again. It must be some other girl he replaced you with.

"I hate to say it baby, but she was really feeling him." Chenle's eyes open as his hand flings backwards to scamper over his pants on the floor. He brings out his phone and puts it within your view as he logs onto his Kink Factory account. You watch as he goes to his saved pile videos to a snippet.

Your eyes enlarge just as you feel your heartbeat stop.

The video…the snippet is of you and Donghyuck. Donghyuck has your legs wide open with the pajama's scampered on the floor. You try not to gasp in horror of how Donghyuck's fingers are smeared in your wetness as his lips distract yours by giving you a heavy kiss.

Watching it on video vs feeling it gives off 2 different types of aura's. On one hand, the video looks so professional and if that girl wasn't you, you'd probably envy her for being pleased the way she was. But seeing that it's you, has you feeling so much conflictions.

"Baby," You hold onto Chenle's arm that's around your waist. "Y-you like this?"

Chenle presses pause on the video, wondering if you didn't like it or if you have a problem with him liking it. "I know I'm not supposed to save it, since we don't save videos but…this was hot,"

"You find this hot?"

As Chenle can't see your face, just as much as you can't see his face, you both have opposite features and reactions. Chenle is hesitant in answering while you look over the moon.

"It's okay if you find this hot." You mummer with some form of joy. "It looks really…"

"New," Chenle hums. "He's going through a rebranding apparently and he found a shy girl." Chenle informs. "I don't know, but I feel like that kinda fits our genre. You know, exploring and all. After watching just the snippet, I really wanted to watch more. But again, it's like I'm blocked from seeing it or something. I think it's just the system and that I'll be able to see it again later, but until then, the video is hot and we could…you know, work with his new content,"

You wonder how Chenle doesn't recogonise the background of the video. Did the teddy bears, the dildo's and the open view really distract Chenle from seeing that it's your room? You don't know why, but you feel really good.

It's like somehow, your self-esteem is boosted. "So what I'm hearing is that, you want to try out new things. Right?"

"I mean," Chenle closes his phone tossing it over on the bed. "Only if you are."

To be honest, he's been wanting to switch things up for the longest of time, and hearing you react positively to it, makes him eager.

-

Donghyuck had a feeling in him that you'd come back. At first, he didn't want to bank on it, since you never called him or sent a text back. But after catching your boyfriend watch the video in one of the bathroom stalls, Donghyuck felt this upliftment as though he knew that you'd come back.

He didn't have the assurance, but he did have the guts to walk up to Chenle and tell him more about the rebrand and new shy cam girl. If Chenle liked it, then you'd want to come back to him. Why? Because you wanted to please your boyfriend. And what's the first step to pleasing your boyfriend? Liking the things he liked.

Donghyuck knew exactly what he was doing when he purposely blocked Chenle's account from viewing his new released videos. And when he told Renjun to post a snippet to get more people to view the video- he knew that amongst the people Chenle would be part of the multitude. And boy was he right.

Donghyuck smiles to himself looking up to the clouds while leaning on the back of the dormitory building. He puffs out some smoke, before inhaling another breath full of smoke as he walks around the building, deciding to take a stroll. As he's walking, Renjun spots him.

"I don't like how calm you are about everything happening," Renjun starts upon seeing Donghyuck's smile.

"Come on Injun," Donghyuck chuckles. "Live a little."

"Live a little?" Renjun raises a brow. "Should I remind you that it's almost been 7 days since you last posted? This isn't normal Donghyuck. You post regularly and almost daily. But after that upload with that shy girl, you've barely been online. So I want you to come clean now. Tell me what's up your sleeves, why you always got a smile like you won the lotto, and whether or not you got a new girl to replace-"

"You guys stress too much you know,"

Renjun rolls his eyes. "You smoke too much you know. It's affecting your thought process. I hope you realize the end of the month is coming and we need money. Money for rent, water, food- not to mention our damn tuition. Why do you keep smiling like you've got this mastermind plan? Because as far as I know, after you received your money from Kink Factory for that video with that shy girl, you blew it all on your stupid cyberpunk project."

"I don't know how many times I have to say this, but my money isn't just my money. I've got so many things to do with money that I always end up broke in the end. Can't you pay this month's rent for me? I'll pay your next month, so that's double," Donghyuck huffs in a lung full amount of smoke. He really hated when he was reminded of his shitty reality. Especially when it involved money. Upon letting go of some air, Donghyuck tries to bring himself back into a calm state.

"Bro, I can't keep paying shit for you. I already help you so much with your stupid Kink account. Do you know how much sleep I lose trying to maintain your account? It doesn't help that we've planned this whole rebrand only for it to blow up in our faces-"

"It's not gonna blow up in our faces-"

Renjun rolls his eyes. "And how the fuck do you know that? News flash, your muse of a shy girl hasn't texted back in a week and the end of the month-"

"Fuck man, stop mentioning end of the month you're killing my vibe." Donghyuck's face turns sour as he takes in another drag of cigarette. "And for fucking dear life, just trust me, keep your fingers crossed and pray for me."

With that, Donghyuck walks away from Renjun.

When Monday rolls in, Donghyuck is stuck on thinking what the hell he'll do if you're indeed not coming back. After his morning class, Donghyuck doesn't have the strength to attend any more classes as his mind is stressed. Deciding to bring back his peace, his feet lead him on campus grounds- trying to look for a bimbo hoe to 'make him feel good'. Some of the campus sluts only wanted a selfie instead of getting paid to the full, so when Donghyuck finds one of his favorite busty girl's, he begins making his way towards her.

Talking her into giving him just a blow job, the two are snuggled up in the public toilet as she gets on her knees and begins sucking Donghyuck off. Donghyuck lights up another cigarette while the girl on her knees deep throats him- making him feel pretty damn good. The smoke burns down the back of his throat but it feels great too. She makes sure to give him the best blowjob of her life.

While Donghyuck moans and turns his head around by the sensation, he's not expecting for his eyes to meet with you. You step into the bathroom, but upon seeing the erotic scene, you gasp and back out of the toilet. Donghyuck grunts out in anger when feeling the weight of the actual fact that you might not come back to him.

For the first time in a whole while, he made so much more money with you being his cam girl. After days passing he realized just how valid the rest of the guys were when stressing. He tried to maintain himself, but really it's been days and he needed to post something otherwise he'd lose viewers.

Taking out his phone, he goes straight into camera mode and begins making a video of how this random girl was sucking his dick. Instead of making it a full on video, he'd make it a short because he didn't want to confuse his new audience that began subscribing and taking an interest.

Shit. He really didn't think you'd blow up like the way you did over so many people.

He moans out in bliss, when with one full pump the slut makes Donghyuck's cum spread all over her face. She giggles and sucks his sensitive tip while cupping all his white semen in her mouth before swallowing it all with a giggle and joyous grin as she grins on the camera. She continues to pump his cock just as Donghyuck runs his hands over his hair. "Fuck you're so good,"

"I know," The girl laughs, while sticking her tongue out and playfully licks him again. Making Donghyuck feel on edge each and every single time. "Oh, yes. Does baby like it when mommy pumps his fucking fat cock?"

The semen shoots out and she takes it all in swallowing it down. Donghyuck groans out in pleasing moan when ending the video. Cleaning himself up as the bimbo slut gets out her phone taking a mirror selfie - just as Donghyuck poses behind her with a kiss on her neck. She thanks him for his service before walking out the bathroom.

Donghyuck enters one of the stalls cleaning himself up before taking a piss. It's a miracle he didn't piss in her mouth.

When he gets out, he isn't expecting to see you but when he does, he ignores you going over to the sink and washing his hands.

"Uhm." You hesitantly move towards him.

Donghyuck notices this and looks at your figure from the mirror before turning his head briefly looking to you. "What?"

"Oh, hi." You clear your throat and nervously scratch your head. "H-how are you?"

Donghyuck doesn't respond. He dries off his hands and leans against the wall. "I've got a class in Ethical Hacking. Make it quick. What?"

You watch as he brings out a cigarettes from his pocket and carefully lights it up puffing out the air. He smokes so much and it takes everything in you to not be utterly disgusted by the smell, instead you hold your ground giving him a shy smile and maintaining eye contact once his eyes land on you. "I tried looking for you for some days now, but I couldn't find you,"

"Why were you looking for me?"

"Well you see, you said I should message you if I change my mind and frankly speaking I accidentally deleted Kink Factory on my phone." You motion while bringing out your phone and stretching your hand to him, for him to see the phone. "But every time I try logging into my account it refuses and rejects. So I wasn't able to get a hold of you because my account didn't want to log into my account. I think your friends might've changed the password too while making my account have a makeover,"

Donghyuck nods his head taking your phone looking at the login screen of Kink Factory. "Renjun might've done that to prevent you from changing anything. I'll tell him to put it back-"

"Wait no- uhm," You're quick to block him from moving again- by abruptly standing in front of him. "I wanted to talk to you,"

"About?" Despite his nonchalant stiff face, inside Donghyuck is jubilated and knows where this is headed. Thank goodness you finally came around.

"I overheard your friends saying you're looking for a new cam girl,"

He nods his head.

"Are you replacing me?"

"You ghosted me for more than a week, what do you mean am I replacing you? I have to." Donghyuck has a perplexed face as he tries to get past you. But you stop him from moving by stretching your arms wide hindering him from passing.

"What about me?"

"What about you?" Donghyuck tilts his head with a fake smile. "Well you bitched out."

"I mean..." You try to stand your ground being serious, since he as well looked serious. "I freaked out a little-"

"A little?"

"Okay I freaked out a lot because it was my first time doing all that. Can't you just give me another chance?"

"You made it clear that you weren't interested when you ghosted me. What's changed?"

You suck in your lips and nod your head a little. "Okay, I wasn't interested back then, but I am now, I promise that I am. I've been thinking a lot about what you said, that this, what we have is purely transactional and that I should use you as much as you use me,"

Donghyuck raises a brow before running his hand through his hair and taking another drag. "Look, babygirl, I'll be platonic with you right now. That night we were together, we got a lot of tips. And when I converted it, it amounted to so much money. I'd have fucking spilt the money with you if you hadn't bitched out. But you did, and it made me realize I don't have time for all that-"

"Please just give me another chance," You beg with your hands together as you look at him with sincerity, "Please. My boyfriend really liked the content and he didn't even know it was me...and I'm willing to suck up my humanity if it means you'll teach me more things to show him,"

Donghyuck raises his brow. You look adorable when begging with your eyes so full of expectancy. "You're not gonna make a fuss again?"

"No, I promise."

"Are you sure that's a promise you can keep?" You eagerly nod your head, however when he inhales on his smoke and somehow gets you against the wall- trapping you, your confidence withering. "Because babygirl, I have to warn you it gets harder from here and I don't have time to pet you like some animal and say 'it'll all be alright'. My time is money." Donghyuck emphasizes.

"I promise," You lick your dry lips lightly still maintaing eye contact with him even though he's slightly taller and blows air away from your face. He pulls your glasses off and bends closer to your face.

"I've wasted too much time waiting for you, I've got some girls ready to replace you. So tell me, are you worth it this time around?"

You nod your head looking determined and even willing to kiss his feet. Clasping your hands together you give him your most honest and sincere answer. "Please, I promise you that this time around I'll be obedient to everything you say. Truly I don't know anything, but my boyfriend really liked it and I just don't want to seem inexperienced but I am- and I know that you can help me. I've been thinking a lot about what you said that if you're gonna use me then I should use you as well. Please, please take me back and I promise I'll hush down and just let you do what you do best,"

It's music to Donghyuck's ears when hearing you beg. It's a sight to behold when you look just so desperate to do anything. Made its the smoke, or maybe it's your presence, but he truly feels more high looking into your eyes. "In that case, I apologize for pushing you outside your comfort zone the first time. But that's just how I roll babygirl. Will you be able to handle it?"

It feels like you're making a contract with the devil. The atmosphere isn't eerie or anything scary, but it's how intimidating he looks. You nod your head.

"Can we seal it with a kiss?" He quietly asks with mischief as he thinks of Jaemin and how he noted things should be permanent. "That way I'll have proof on my lips that you willingly agreed to do this, again."

Your nervous when accepting, and when his head closes in and his lips meet yours, you try to brace yourself for kissing another guy other than your boyfriend. In your head, you try to remind yourself that you're doing all this for Chenle. That you're doing this so that your sex life won't be something that you dread each and every time you're around Chenle. And so when Donghyuck's moist and warm lips press against yours, you relax completely and close your eyes. It's only when he starts to lick at the corner of your mouth that you open your eyes to find him smirking back at you and pulling away.

"See you at 21h00?"

Feeling flustered from the kiss your eyes pane in between both his own eyes. "Uhm, how about 22h00? Tonight is date night with my boyfriend, I'll try getting him out by 21h30,"

"No problem."

What better way to seal the deal with another mouth deep kiss that has Donghyuck groping you (in excitement that he doesn't have to look for a replacement) and patting your cheek before leaving the toilets. You're left in another frenxy daze of trying to mentally and physically prepare yourself for the events that will take place in the late night.

And it's as though your whole body is waiting for that moment, because the rest of the days events happen in such a flash- in a hurry and in a quick blink of an eye. One moment you're taking down notes with one of your pencils that has seen better days, another second you and Chenle are walking home and he makes food for you (Chinese style) and you can't even enjoy it that much because just when you blink he's already walking out your bedroom and wishing you a good night- and before you know it, there's a knock on your day.

Feeling a deja vu moment, you make your way to the door. Donghyuck is dressed in all black as usual, with that same leather jacket and that nose irritating cigarette. He greets you with a sly smile before he enters your dorm and walks past your living room and straight into your room with you following behind him. Unloading his bag filled with teddy bears, electronics and different types of dildos as well as vibrators, cuffs and different lubes scented and none scented, you feel your heart tighten in your chest.

Are you really ready for this?

You jump when Donghyuck suddenly appears in front of you. His fingers snap at you and you hum out. "Huh?"

"I asked if you're good?"

"Oh," You inhale sharply and nod your head. "I- I'm good."

"Nervous?" He questions, moving over to your desk continuing to set up his laptop device, camera and tripod as well as speaker and chargers with no emotions on his face.

Not knowing if it's a trick question or if he's genuinely concerned, you push those thoughts at the back of your head and simply nod your head.

Donghyuck follows your eyes to the bed and he notices you're looking at the toys. Once he's done logging in and connecting his speaker to the laptop as well as camera, he moves over to the bed. Taking a seat on the bed, he spreads his hand on the bed holding up a life like large penis dildo. "Tonight I wanna have sex with you."

Still standing on the door way, you hope your whole body doesn't show how sudden his whole sentence makes you feel. You try to calm down, but the little tremble that spread over your entire body already has his attention. "What?"

Donghyuck notes how you're spaced out. He was just joking, but your reaction makes him pull your leg some more. "It's been a week since I've posted or even went on live, I can't come on with softcore. My fans haven't waited all week for another foreplay," Unfortunately when he hears a ding on his laptop, he focuses again and stops joking around.

You don't even know that he's joking around because of his poker face. So you take him seriously. "You want to have s-sex as in..."

"Jokes aside, I'll let you pick instead. Hardcore or softcore? I'm good with anything?"

Did he just say jokes aside? Was it a joke to begin with? Your mind was boiling. "S-softcore,"

"Okay. What do you wanna do?"

You're put on the spot and instead of being confident, your head has war flashbacks. Why did you agree again? Was it really necessary that you and Chenle learnt how to have sex? Is pleasing Chenle really worth all this? You'll be cheating on him if you have sex with Donghyuck- speaking of which can't he just demonstrate how it's supposed to be? Would he really be inside of you? You don't even know how it feels- but now you're gonna let him enter you?

Donghyuck snorts out a chuckle as he gets up from the bed and moves to the curtains. Finding that little remote you used last time, he parts the curtains and moves towards the bedroom light dimming it. He even adjusts the camera, facing the side of your bed. When he's done and you're still looking like a deer in headlights, he picks out the clothing he got for you and the pink mask you wore last time.

Walking to you, he snaps his fingers twice and you jerk while looking up at him. "Babygirl, I was just kidding. We're doing nothing too hard. According to Renjun, it's best to get you accustomed to the toys first."

"You're gonna use the t-toys?"

Donghyuck nods his head.

"On me?"

"Well you are my muse and cam girl. And just before you know it, you'll be my very own customized girl." Donghyuck pats your cheek. "I'll be gentle. It's nearly 23h00, no one likes to masturbate that late, unless their perverts, so be a good girl and dress this up for me,"

You lift your hands slowly towards the item...the skimpy looking apron with flowery outlines. "Just the apron? Why an apron?"

"Well I tried to be mindful of the fact that you don't want your body to be seen. This'll cover up enough of you. And if you're having second thoughts think of the kiss,"

You don't know what to do, except do what you must. You're nervous and scared, but you try to remind yourself that you begged Donghyuck...and like he said the kiss confirmed you begging him for another chance. The kiss that made the deal valid again.

"Only the apron."

While you go in your joint bathroom to change, Donghyuck picks up one of the toys- the g-spot egg vibrator. It's a long yet curved almost elastic pink vibrator, that had one large circular end, as well as a smaller one. Donghyuck connects the device to his kink factory, allowing for tips to control the speed.

Meanwhile, in the flophouse, or rather Donghyuck's shabby apartment that he shared with 5 other guys, is vibrant this time of the night. Each male in their own room waiting on Donghyuck to start his cam.

Jaemin (in his shared room with Renjun) and Renjun are on their own separate beds having earphones, while Renjun had his laptop tuned on to Donghyuck's account, Jaemin had his phone connected and he was underneath the covers.

Jeno's in his room (the one he shared with Donghyuck) with the door locked, he's seated on his gaming desk messaging some of other Kinkers betting on whether Donghyuck's live would be a big hit or flop- he obviously voted flop.

Mark, also in on the bet is rather in the bathroom, away from his shared room with Jaehyun. He sits on the bathtub's rail with some tissues set just in case.

Jaehyun in his own room starts counting down with the countdown, just like him, countless other little numbers begin to build up on Sexy Sun's live stream- one of them being Chenle, who was granted access. All the numbers build up on the live, just as all the hands of the horny guys as well as horny girls stuff down their pants/skirts/shorts and begin fiddling with their boners, and wet pussies from looking at the screen.

Redirecting you to live...

[Sexy Sun] Live now!

Your moaning entirely fills up your room. With your face covered with your mask, your glasses long gone from your face, and the apron draped over your boobs and is supposed to cover your mid thigh- but with your legs spread wide open, the apron folds over your stomach.

You're sitting on Donghyuck's lap as he's sitting on a chair. With your neck arched backwards and your wrists cuffed against the chair, just as one of Donghyuck's hands holds your leg wide open to completely expose your pussy to the camera- his other hand rubs the lubricant all over your puffy wet pussy which is slightly hairy.

Donghyuck's lips, mouth and attention are too busy leaving hickey marks on your neck as well as hearing how loud your moans can go. He rubs faster on your clit with all four of his fingers. Rubbing in a circular non stop motion and even swiping his hand incredibly fast moving left and right.

Your bottom starts shaking causing Donghyuck's boner to poke on him. He grunts and thrusts his hips slight up trying to get as much out of it. But he's so focused on rubbing you that he subsides his own pleasures.

"Keep your legs open for me babygirl," Donghyuck whispers breathlessly, just as you hook your feet on Donghyuck's knees. His other hand has no limits when groping on your breast and pulling it out on the side before his mouth dips down and engulfs your nipple sucking on it while his fingers eagerly go fast.

It doesn't help that the music is still on the first song, indicating that you and Donghyuck still had a long way. Your mind is already clouding with lust when Donghyuck's fingers move in a motion that has you whimpering and moaning in bliss. You can't even move your hands because of the cuffs, but your legs feeling the buildup are slightly shaking. And when feeling a swirl of emotions build up from your stomach, your eyes roll tightly to shut and just as you're about to close your legs- Donghyuck's hand lets go of your breast and instantly grips your leg wider to let his wet fingers have more space to rub erotically all over your slippery cum filled pussy.

Not aware of Donghyuck's movements, he quickly stretches his hand back and pulls on the g-spot pink vibrator and without warning pushes the end inside of your hole. It makes you gasp aloud with your eyes popping out for a second as you feel the device curl up all the way in places that Chenle’s dick had reached- and just as the pink ball is shoved inside of you- it leads to a gateway for intense pleasure to shoot inside of you.

It begins vibrating uncontrollably inside of your walls and you yell out in pure pleasure and ecstasy when Donghyuck also adds in two of his fingers in the same whole. Your moans are turned furiously into joyous yelps and yells of pleasure as your hands are restrained by the cuffs- your body is bouncing and jerking all over Donghyuck in extreme pleasure. You can't even get a hold of yourself as your eyes see stars every time you shut them tight.

"Ah shit! Fuck!" Donghyuck curses out when feeling a strong force trying to push his fingers out- tiny bits of squirts push out, but Donghyuck is adamant on rocking his fingers inside of you continuously and finds it entertaining at how you can't control yourself. You’re leaking and squirming and are out of breath and you can’t keep your legs open- that it takes Donghyuck wrapping his leg over yours to stop you from shutting your legs.

“Too much!” Despite the mask covering up your mouth, your voice is beyond your control and bounces all over the room in frantic pleasure filled moans and yells.

"Is it too much? Is it too much?" Donghyuck mocks and pulls his fingers in and out of you just as your hole shots out passionately white cum in squirts. Donghyuck bites his lips watching it all flow out as well as how far it shoots out the pink vibrator. Donghyuck laughs. "Aw baby, you know the fans were tipping you right. They wanna see your pretty, hairy little pussy. They love seeing it, come on, give 'em a show-" Donghyuck mouths very dirtily while tapping on your pussy that oozes out white cum.

The tapping sound over your pussy as well as frantic jolts from your core has your eyes looking to Donghyuck. You rock your own pussy on his hands, and it makes him smirk when your hips roll and your pussy pulsates and begs for him to continue touching you. Donghyuck entertains you and lets you ride out your high. His ears are attentive to the continuous pings that are heard from his laptop- letting him know that the tips were still coming in.

“You’re doing good. Think you could go for another round?”

Your overwhelmed in pleasure and can't even keep your eyes open or your head straight. Donghyuck laughs at your drunken out state and uncuffs one of your wrists so that he can get a chance to stand up and move to where the vibrator landed. Getting back on the seat with your resting body, Donghyuck doesn't take a seat, but instead cuffs your wrist again and allows you to sit down while he gets the extra set of cuffs and stretches your legs wide open and in view of the camera and cuffs them to the chair making sure that the locked chain keeps your legs open and doesn’t allow you to shut it.

He then stands behind your chair each hand playing with your boobs. "I love your tits, damn,"

He squeezes them and rubs them gently before letting go and giving them another tight squeeze himself. Donghyuck starts stroking your breasts slowly until both of your nipples poke out slightly from the apron, he undoes the apron and watches it fall and come undone, completely exposing you. You thought you'd be irritated, but your head is clouded so much.

Donghyuck's fingers massage each breast gently and you moan calmly and he smirks at your reaction. Placing the vibrator inside of you again, you're not ready for the second round of overdosing pleasure shooting out of you. Donghyuck can't believe how fast the tips come in when the vibrator is in you again. Jaemin is pretty smart when it comes toys- Your spasming body gets Donghyuck is grab on your neck and bite his lips while coming to the side to have a look at your eyes that are struggling to remain normal. They're rolling, shutting, squeezing- and it gets Donghyuck so hard seeing you fucked out of your mind. This is just a toy, wait till he'd put himself in you- Damn he couldn't wait and palms his pants while watching your face.

That turned him on. And it's even raw when you try and close your legs but your body keeps on jerking and your perky tits bounce and pop everywhere that it gets Donghyuck slapping on them while still grabbing your neck tightly. He can't resist opening up your legs while bending down and stuffing in his fingers in your core again. Hearing the squelching sounds of your pussy as his fingers rapidly rampage your whole- You feel like you almost have an outer body experience when the pleasure is excites and tingles all your senses and floods you with waves of please.

He inserts all four of his digits inside your tight pussy and thrusts them in and out rapidly in speed. The moment feels long but you’re squirting again and again and again and Donghyuck keeps on putting the vibrator in you even when you beg him that you’re tired and don’t want it. Instead he pats your head and says: “You’re doing good baby, you’re doing so good. Just make me happy one more time. Can you do that for me?”

The whole night feels too long until your cum and squirt out again for the fifth time and your body is lumpy on the chair and almost falling off, with your neck still being gripped in Donghyuck's hand. Your heart is beating erratically, and your whole body is coated in cum- from Donghyuck smearing your juices all over you wanting you to taste it and loving the shower effect it was having in your room he couldn't stop playing with your juices and spreading it- heck he even got a lot of himself wet from you. The light on the camera turns off indicating the end of the live, just as well as the music stops noting you that it's finally over.

You're breathless and hot. Donghyuck claps his hands and brightly pats your head while uncuffing you, your body drops to the ground too weak to move, but Donghyuck picks you up and places you on the bed.

"Fuck babygirl, you were so hot." Donghyuck opens up the window and before monitoring the tips made for tonight, he looks to you on the bed when hearing a deep snore. "Babygirl?"

You're passed out?

Donghyuck gets off from where he is to go to your bed and watches how you’re really out cold. He picks up your blanket and drapes it over your tired body. Trying not to laugh at how the pleasure knocked you out, he quietly moves around your room. He wanted to give you some pointers for you and your boyfriend, but seeing your sleeping body, he ends up just writing them down on his messenger before sending it to you. Only packing up the toys, cuffs and his electronics, he stuffs the teddy bears underneath your bed before closing the window and curtains and lights and even slightly closing your bedroom door.

He's about to go out when seeing the time is nearly 22h45, but his stomach grumbles and he stops by the front door. Initially the live was supposed to go on for 15 minutes, but he added another 20 minutes seeing as though he wasn’t done yet making you feel really really really good. He clears his throat and sets his backpack down and goes into your dorm kitchen, it's quite big. He opens up the fridge…not wanting to steal or take advantage of your kitchen in your sleeping state, he only pulls out a slice of bread in the heaven of food supplies in the fridge.

He gets sidetracked when seeing a lunchbox labeled 'Left over'. He takes it out and marvels when seeing the food. The Chinese food. Heating it up in the microwave, his mouth waters once he gets to take a bite of the food. It's delicious. And so minutes later, when Donghyuck is done eating a portion, he ends up leaving your dorm and goes to his shared unit dorm, whereby he's greeted by his roommates who all congratulate him on pleasing you well. It was worth the watch- and they were so content at how exposed your body was tonight, because it meant they could prepare for the more things to do to you.

05h00 a.m.

Your alarm rings jolting you completely from the bed. Your hyperventilating when you jump out of the bed and see you're only in an apron that's around your waist. Your butt and entire body feels the wind that passes by and you can see and feel all the sticky cum resting on your body. Searching for your You try not to feel disgusted when seeing the dried cum on the floor, and the chair randomly in the middle of the room with some teddy bears peaking from underneath the bed- not to mention that your room smells congested and wreaks of your cum scent. You're deeply sickened by how untidy your whole room looks.

"Shit."

Your hands get to work, making sure to not leave a spot untouched. Even the walls have your juices and you go in deep cleaning mode, making sure that your room is spotless.

After a long cleaning session, you find refuge in preparing for school and your actual classes. You've already bathed but yet you're feeling sticky and uncomfortable… it's probably due to the fact that you feel that many people have their eyes on you….they aren't but it feels like they are. Like they know what you did yesterday, and that you were on Sexy Sun's live.

Getting in class and pulling out your laptop, you're moved when seeing you're logged onto that god forsaking website. You shut your laptop immediately when pairs of eyes are on you again. You go on with all the morning classes you have, your mind seriously trying to focus but you feel disorientated.

When you're on your own, during a free period, you take a seat by your usual spot waiting for Chenle. But while you wait for him, your hands are already opening up your laptop.

Just as you see your account logged into with that same set up and with new additional followers, you notice a message from Donghyuck Sexy Sun: We never got to fully introduce our lessons, but I'll do it here for now. You passed out cold and I'm sorry for leaving all of a sudden, you looked like you needed rest. Anyway, lesson 1 of your sex educations: touch.

-

“missed you.” he whispers. the unexpected confession has your heart pounding. though you’d been friends for years, he rarely ever initiated physical contact. it wasn’t until recently that he’d become so bold. “c'mon," he's already tugging off your jacket. "i made hot chocolate."

...

two half-empty mugs sit in front of you, wisps of steam still lingering around the lid. renjun’s legs are stretched out, perched comfortably on the living room table, and yours are curled to the side.

his head rests against your shoulder and with each breath you take, you inhale the scent of his shampoo. the heat that radiates off his body draws you in closer, drowsiness swimming through your veins.

he watches the movie intently, not having said more than a few words in the past twenty minutes. every so often he’ll move around as though trying to find the best position to sit in. it’s after a while that he moves his head to your lap.

without thinking much of it, your fingers find his hair, running through the soft strands.

“jun?” from how you’re seated, you can see the corners of his lips twitch at the nickname.

he hums in response, eyes no longer focused on the tv but instead closed.

you continue stroking his hair, studying his features for any sign of discomfort. a quick glance at the window tells you it’s late. “i should probably go soon.”

he groans in protest, hand gripping your leg like it’d prevent you from leaving. “you can stay here. too cold to walk back.”

it's no surprise when you agree.

…

the bedroom door creaks open. your best friend appears with a dopey smile.

“why do you look so happy?” you stuff your hands inside the pockets of his black hoodie.

he presses his cheek. “no, i don’t.” now frowning, he brushes off your comment with the awkward clearing of his throat. “it’s just been a while since we hung out.”

“a week?”

he flushes, playfully shoving you. “shut up.” 

you fall back onto the bed with a giggle.

“i’ll get changed then.” he sifts through the cabinet drawer before pulling out a t-shirt and pair of pajama pants. “can you, uh,” he motions with his hand.

“oh. sure.” you turn away.

the sound of clothes rustling fills an otherwise space. your toes wiggle against the comforter. against your better judgment you let your eyes wander, gaze trailing toward the dark corner of the room.

would he notice if you looked?

“done.”

you hurriedly face the wall, forbidden images of his smooth skin stained in your mind.

he appears beside the edge of the bed, looking at you curiously. you fiddle with your thumbs and hope he can’t see how flustered you are. “should we go to sleep then?” he says slowly.

after your confirmation he turns off the string lights hung above his desk before joining you on the bed, you on the far right and him left. 

“i’m glad you stayed," he speaks after some time. “i mean, i like when you’re here.”

“really?”

“yeah,” he sounds breathless. “i’d like it more if you never left.” he says the last part so quietly you barely hear him, as though the words weren’t even meant for you.

you stare at the ceiling, tucked beneath the covers as you try to process everything. “but i don’t live here.”

“you could.”

“are you being serious?” 

renjun wasn’t one to joke. but tonight he's acting far different than ever before.

“yes.” 

you face each other. you can't help smiling as his cheek squishes against the pillow.

but what you say next has you frowning just as fast. "what if….if you meet someone? would you want me around so often?” you trail off sadly, hoping your voice doesn’t give you away.

“i don’t want to meet someone else.” the look on his face is like you’d offended him somehow.

“why?”

“i’m good with how things are.” almost, renjun thinks. “move in with me.” his hand finds yours beneath the comforter. “i promise i’ll make you happy if you give me a chance.”

your stomach flutters when he entwines your fingers. his palm is so small, you think. despite renjun's tough persona, your best friend was more fragile than he led on.

“i like you.” he confesses. “i thought it was obvious.” he laughs before looking away. he swallows the lump starting to form. “maybe not." your silence leaves him feeling self conscious. "i never should have listened to haechan.” he silently curses his nosy floormate. “just forget i said anything.” 

“junnie,” you say his name softly. his eyes are squeezed shut, so when your finger brushes the side of his face, he flinches. "look at me," you whisper.

a tear slides from the corner of his eye down to his nose. he huffs, angry at himself for getting emotional. “i’m sorry.” he apologizes. “this is going far worse than i'd hoped.”

“you’re so impatient,” you murmur. “if you had just waited more than a few seconds…are you going to be this stubborn when i move in?”

“w—when?” he stutters, leaning up slightly. the comforter slides down to reveal an oversized band tee. “so you’re saying—”

“—that i accept your offer.” you finish for him.

you scooch closer to wipe away any remaining tears with your thumbs. his eyes flutter at your gentle touch. you trace his cheek.

"you're so sweet." the praise slips from your lips as though you've said it a hundred times. you don't even realize he's heard you til his face burns beneath your palm.

"oh god." renjun laughs, mouth widening into a smile. "stop. i'm going to explode." he disappears beneath the comforter.

"but it's true." you're laughing too.

you can barely make out the shape of his face under here. his breath is warm on your neck, your fingers blindly wandering around.

he nearly chokes when they go too far.

"what am I touching right now?" you ask.

your hand unintentionally slips beneath the bottom of his shirt, fingertips barely brushing his torso. 

you freeze. you can feel his stomach contract with each shaky inhale, the waistband of his pajama pants.

"you should know," he rasps. "weren't you staring at me earlier?" his words dawn on you. 

Mark's face is expressionless while looking at Donghyuck, who's feeling himself to add to the point. And Mark has missed you a lot, but he thinks that the faster he gets a break from his chaotic roommate, the better; he can't wait to have a week free of the jokes and headaches Donghyuck causes him because Donghyuck will have you to annoy. Even when he will still be working, to Mark, that sounds pretty much like a vacation.

"Nah, dude. It's fucking cold, you'll get sick."

"You will get sick if you don't get anything to eat as soon as you make it to work," Donghyuck answers back as he gets up from his chair and puts his favorite Michael Jackson t-shirt on. "Promise me you'll order."

"Yeah, I promise," Mark sounds sincere. After a quick hug and a few pats on each other's back, Mark is opening the front door ready to leave for a late-night music session. "Please receive y/n well for me–

"Y/n!"

Screams and laughs from both you and your brother fill the little apartment, as you greet and hug him after almost four months without seeing each other. Just in time, is what Donghyuck thinks while observing the cute interaction, and gently caressing his belly from underneath the t-shirt because, well, he is confident but—even though he has known you for years and you've shared many situations—, he's not confident enough around you to show himself with nothing on like that. At least not yet.

His face lights up as soon as he sees you extend your arms in his direction, and Donghyuck manages to squeeze you into a warm hug and spin you in the air while the both of you laugh.

Your brother says his goodbyes, and Donghyuck tells him there's a chance they could meet up at Johnny's later, in case he wants to join in after work.

"Alright, I'll get there with Taeyong later then."

He waves to both of you and closes the front door, leaving you alone with his roommate.

"Take a relax, bro," he offers you to sit at the counter and you laugh after hearing the famous line after months. You observe him filling a cup with water and placing it in front of you before speaking again. "Want some ramen?"

"Hell yeah. I'm starving."

"Let me heat it for you."

But he was already on it even before you answered. Donghyuck knows well he's very good at turning the simple dish into a delicious meal, and that it's one of your favorite things to share since you two met.

You wouldn't say it was love at first sight, but maybe adoration since the first encounter. Only weeks after your brother moved to start studying, he invited you over because he was missing home too much. And Donghyuck wouldn't be his apartment buddy until a year after, but they already frequented the same group of friends. The two of you were standing awkwardly in a corner at Taeyong's birthday party, and ended up at your brother's because you were hungry, eating ramen together: his secret recipe (that wasn't mysterious at all) that included tomatoes and scrambled eggs and that he only made for 'real special situations'.

Donghyuck sets the bowl in front of you, the tomato scrambled noodles and eggs making your mouth water and curve in a smile. A ray of sunshine gets on the chair beside you even though it's almost midnight, and makes you feel at home, warming you even though it's freezing outside.

"So, how's school?" You start talking with a mouth full of ramen, lips moisturized with its sauce that makes Donghyuck smile when he sets his eyes on them. His look makes you blush, but you blame it on the spiciness of the Hot Chicken Spicy x2 package of noodles that he prepared for you. "Hyuck, this is burning my mouth."

"Well, don't put so many noodles in your mouth at once!" Donghyuck brings the glass of water to your hands and you accept it immediately. Its freshness somehow makes you forget the mess that Hyuck's eyes on your filthy ramen lips could have caused. 

Maybe surviving a week living with the guy you like (who is your brother's best friend, which makes things a lot more complicated) will be harder than you thought.

"School's been kicking my ass," the boy continues and you nod your head, sadly sharing the sentiment. "I started my winter break last Friday, but I have to take a final in two weeks so I'll be studying. And Mark doesn't get a winter break."

"Motherfucking TY, won't let him rest."

"That's what I say!" He agrees with you, his eyes widening and sighing in exasperation. "Both of them are workaholics. Won't stop working on their music even for a week."

"Yeah. And knowing Mark, he'll try to make the most of his time since he doesn't have to teach at school for two weeks."

You knew in advance that your brother wouldn't be home much despite your visit, however extraordinary it may be. He warned you about it, that he would be focusing 100% on Taeyong's album, but that he would definitely try to take advantage of the free time to go out with you, or just chill together at home. On the other hand, Mark assured you that Donghyuck would be very happy to spend the time he wouldn't be there with you. The idea gave you butterflies in your stomach when your brother texted it to you; some emojis of a mischievous smile followed the message but you didn't know how to interpret it, since Mark is terrible at texting and pretty much a boomer.

"But don't worry!" Donghyuck speaks after a brief pause. "I'll study early in the mornings while you sleep, then we'll have the afternoons to hang out, and Mark can join whenever he's free. He'll make time for it, I'm sure."

Somehow, the thought of Donghyuck getting up early during his break to have the afternoons free to spend time with you makes your heart melt a little. You lower your head, trying to hide the inevitable smile on your lips, but you fail wildly. You decide to adhere to Donghyuck's plan, nodding and showing the tight-lipped smile that spreads to his face.

"Good." He nods as well. "So, you wanna go to Johnny's later?" Donghyuck asks, his thumb pointing in the direction of the door.

"Yeah, sure." You get up from the kitchen table to start doing your dishes at the sink. "I'm excited to see the boys after so long."

"And we have some new additions to the group."

Donghyuck's voice reaches your ears from behind. You're quickly cleaning the single bowl and glass you used, so you finish and turn around to keep listening to him face-to-face. Donghyuck picks up on his monologue. 

"There's Jungwoo. He's living with Jaehyun and Doyoung and he's about to finish doing vet in college. And it's funny, because he really looks and acts like a doggie, and he's doing vet," Donghyuck finishes the sentence, looking at you with an expression that suggests 'Can you believe that?'.

His silliness makes you laugh, which encourages Donghyuck to continue sharing his first impressions of his new friends. "Then there's Yuta. He came from Japan and opened a café on the first floor of the building where Johnny and Taeyong live, and that's how they met. He's a little cold with me," Donghyuck shrugs at it, yet you can tell in his expression how he gets discouraged when he thinks about that situation. "But he's not cold with Mark. And Mark is, I don't know, he's obsessed with Yuta." There is a brief silence in which Donghyuck only looks into your eyes with a super serious face. "I hate that."

And you burst into laughter. You don't need to ask Donghyuck if he's jealous, because you know for a fact that he very much is. As soon as he doesn't get all the attention, he gets annoying. Don't you dare not answer one of the silly cat reels he sends on Instagram or he will start texting you things like "Pay attention to me" or "Answer or I'll get sad." So you know how it can be. He doesn't get annoyed over the Baekhyun posts he shares with you because you always reply to them. Donghyuck might get jealous of Baekhyun too, but he won't show that to you.

"Don't worry, Hyuck." You circle the island to stand next to him and try to comfort him, one of your hands caressing circles on his back. He quickly seeks comfort by resting his head on your shoulder, and you can notice his slightly wet hair smells like green apple and cinnamon, like baby shampoo. "You're Mark's best friend. The things you've been through together, he won't get through again with anyone else. That's what's special about you two."

"You're right, y/n," he agrees while getting his head off your shoulder. "None of them will ever know Mark ran out of toilet paper at a party once and he sacrificed a sock to clean his-"

"Oh my fucking God" you cut him off before he can finish, not wanting to hear any of it. "Gross! Some things are better kept as a secret, Hyuck! I'll go change."

"But we are like a family!" he screams as you get out of the kitchen and into Donghyuck and Mark's room to get ready for Johnny's house. "Sharing those things helps us get closer!"

The walls are thin, so you don't bother answering Donghyuck from the room. "Honestly, Hyuck, I don't really care where my brother's butt has been or whatever. Let's get closer by sharing some drinks at Johnny's."

Wednesday, 01:47 a.m.

"So, how did you two meet?" Yuta asks, taking up the free space next to you on the couch and passing you two cans of beer. Exactly what you need after three rounds of karaoke with Johnny and Doyoung that are inexhaustible.

They're still going off strong in front of the TV, waiting for Mark to get back and join them in their madness.

"Oh, we're not together."

"Oh, that's for sure. I know you're not pulling any bitches, Hyuck."

Donghyuck laughs dryly at the Japanese boy, putting on his best expression of annoyance; tongue poking at his inside cheek and rolling his eyes, and he replies, "That's not true. I can pull anyone I want."

"Prove it," Yuta pushes him because he knows that Donghyuck is an easy-going person, and always a good target for a challenge.

Donghyuck quickly scans the room while you busy yourself taking a sip of your can, not wanting to get involved in Yuta's teasing, until he lands eyes on Jaehyun. He knows the boy loves him and is almost always up for some of his affection.

"Jaehyun's not an option," Yuta adds, the always good observant, and Donghyuck sighs very audibly before throwing his head back on the couch.

But he composes himself quickly to ask, turning slightly to you with his arm still firm around your shoulders. "Would you get with me? Hypothetically?"

“Are you asking me because I’m the only girl in the room?” you question him with a raise of your brows.

“Nah, you’re my first option,” he replies with a subtle smile, eyes closing slightly into the shape of two crescent moons.

You like to think he truly has no idea the effect his words have on you, and that he's just messing with Yuta, trying to prove a point. Yet, you can't help feel the heat rise to your cheeks. A deep breath is all it takes you to ignore the intern butterflies and follow the conversation, as if you're not already imagining the thousand scenarios where you and Donghyuck are an established couple living with two dogs (you would like a cat but he's allergic) and a hamster.

“But I thought your first option was Jaehyun–”

“Just answer the question, y/n.”

“Alright, jeez…”

You roll your eyes and give yourself a moment to think. Would you get together with Hyuck, hypothetically? Considering the four-year crush you've had on your brother's best friend since the moment you met him, no, you wouldn't.

You would get with him for real. All of your friends back home said it's time you brave up and just confess to him. You better come back with the signed marriage papers, your best friend’s voice resonates in your head.

"I mean… Yes?" you answer by looking at Yuta, trying to avoid Donghyuck's eyes that you know are set on the blushed skin of your face. "I guess Hyuck is not a bad match," you finish with a shy shrug, sinking yourself deeper on the couch and taking another long drink.

Donghyuck smiles contentedly at your answer, his chest filling with confidence, and kisses you wet with beer on the forehead that gets you squeezed up to his body for a second. By the time he's done, you rest your head on his shoulder to return the affection, trying not to throw up all the butterflies and not noticing Yuta's knowing stare.

"Keyword: hypothetically. And I said 'Prove it.'" Yuta pushes a little more.

"Bro, you're so annoying." Donghyuck gets up from the couch exasperated, and almost makes you spill all your beer while trying to get you up with him. "What, you want us to make out?"

Yuta nods, crossing his arms and spreading his legs on the couch that he has all for himself now, challenging the younger boy.

"Sorry dude, we're not into exhibitionism."

Donghyuck takes your hand to drag you away from the living room, but you can still hear Yuta's laugh and the words the two you would end up choosing to ignore for the rest of the night.

"This is not how you're getting some, Hyuck! Don't say I didn't try to help you!"

Donghyuck's hand holding yours (or rather dragging you into the kitchen) feels embarrassingly good. Worth blushing and having your heart fastening inside your chest. Damn Donghyuck for making you feel like a teenager who had just exchanged looks with their highschool crush. And just when you needed a break from that ridiculous wave of emotions…

“What are you wearing!?” You hear Johnny’s voice coming out of the speakers, as he’s still holding the mic to his mouth while the instrumentals of his most iconic karaoke performance play on the back, A Flying Butterfly by YB.

Mark and Taeyong have arrived at the apartment and they have caught everyone's attention because Taeyong is wearing an inflatable T-Rex costume. Jungwoo is the first one to get to Taeyong with his mouth open in astonishment, an expressión that is quickly replaced with amusement as soon as he gets to hug and squeeze the dinosaur in his hands.

“Jungwoo, stop squeezing my butt!” Taeyong’s voice comes a little distorted from inside the costume, but it’s clear enough for everyone to laugh at his comment. “You're going to make it deflate!”

Jungwoo keeps looking at Taeyong in the costume as if he was a kid who just saw Santa; hugging the dinosaur and saying it feels perfect for cuddling. This is the moment you understand what Donghyuck meant when he said Jungwoo looks just like an excited doggie.

“Taeyong saw it online and got it because it was on sale a couple weeks ago,” Mark starts explaining to no one in particular. “But then he ordered it and we completely forgot about it, until it arrived at the studio tonight.”

“I put it on inside the elevator so I could surprise you guys,” Taeyong adds with a happy smile, unzipping the costume just for his head to come out of it, somehow making it look all more ridiculous. Now the T-Rex looks like he has a floating head right above his stomach.

“Yeah… We had to stop the elevator for some more time because getting it inflated was way harder than I thought,” your brother says as he watches Taeyong and Jungwoo struggle with each other, because Jungwoo desperately wants to get inside the costume too but Taeyong doesn’t want to stop wearing it just yet.

Yuta only judges them from where he’s still sitting on the couch, arms crossed while shaking his head. “I can’t believe you really spent money on this.” Yet his comment is followed by a laugh. It’s not as intense as Doyoung and Taeil’s, though, who have been laughing since Taeyong crossed the door, and haven’t missed the chance to film and take pictures of  him (and Jungwoo who still wouldn’t leave his side.)

"Alright so," Johnny says into the mic to attract everyone's attention. "Karaoke?"

The guys start to team up; some out of affinity or fun, others because they know they will definitely win the most points if they are grouped with certain people who hit all the notes on any song. Donghyuck, however, doesn't team up with anyone right away. He just stands in the middle of Johnny's and Taeyong's living room, watching Mark immediately cling to Yuta (who already had Jungwoo clinging to his other side.) He gestures towards your brother with arms crossed and a roll of his eyes. So, noticing his jealousy over your brother's recent preferences—jealousy that wasn't that hard to notice, he made it pretty obvious—and taking pity on your friend, you offer to team up with him.

"Wanna kick some ass together?" And you observe him playing hard to get. You're not a bad match for karaoke; you might not sing as well as Taeil or Doyoung, but you don't suck at it, and Donghyuck knows that very well. So when he starts doubting over his answer, you know he just wants to mess with you.

Suddenly Taeil is standing in front of the two of you, and Donghyuck, with an incredibly exaggerated face of astonishment, asks him:

"You wanna team up with us?!"

See, you knew he wasn't going to leave you out of his team.

Taeil only shrugs, as relaxed as always. "Sure."

Donghyuck squeezes his older friend in a hug that only gets a groan out of Taeil (and a little smile) before throwing an arm each on your shoulders, and screams to the rest. "Everybody, we got Moon Taeil!"

A punch from your fist to his ribs. A little groan followed by a laugh coming out of his mouth and a gentle squeeze on your shoulder. He's quick to correct himself.

"I got Moon Taeil and y/n! And we're gonna kick your butts!"

Thursday, 6:22 p.m.