お気を付家くださいね～

I love the generational gap between emoji usage. Anyone over 50 sees 🙃 and thinks "silly time! whee 🙃", whereas the rest of us immediately hear, verbatim, "they ask you how you are, and you just have to say that you're fine, when you're not really fine, but you just can't get into it because they would ne--"

Flying the flag upside down is a distress signal

We love our bread we love our butter but most of all we love eachother

Oh okay

It’s… in words…

apparently when i was born the…guy after the midwife? the baby doctor? was this russian guy with HUGE hands who just sorta. squeezed my head (my dad says he was worried that he was gonna crush me like a coke can) and was like “this is a strong baby”

why calmly explain shit to someone when you can just hit em with that Smug Anime Girl

never i repeat never put on time warp at a party unless you want the theatre kids to destroy your house

a bold assumption to think I would allow theatre kids within even 500 feet of my home

emperor kuzco was clearly gay

hes 19, with unlimited power, and he ain’t got a gf. the only time we see him interact with any women his own age is when he’s rejecting like 7 of them rapid fire. he pretends to date pacha in a gag that lasts like 10 solid minutes. listen to me god damnit