don’t you call me baby

Hey Tumblr, 

How you been? Still accusing me of being involved in Princess Diana’s death? Ha ha! You little rascals (All will be revealed on The Crown Season 5, but I will have gone underground by then.) 

Here’s an exclusive photo of me and movie star Jake Gyllenhaal who you know from “Prisoners” and “John Mulaney & The Sack Lunch Bunch.” I am posting it here first because my phone wasn’t synced to the Tumblr app and so I wasn’t being a good and active member of the community the way I had hoped. I still have probably the best layout of any Tumblr page ever. Scroll through the “Archives” and remember all the good times we have had. 

I wish you all the most glorious of Tuesdays,