Midnight 🌙

Yes, I was in high school back then. A lot of traumas and the adulthood in general were ahead of me. But I was pretty busy with studying (I studied a lot). I’m trying to remember how it was before - obviously - Tik tok, or even the conception of reels (except for the vine but anyone from those years can tell how different the vine was); before Snapchat and in my case even before I had instagram. What was I doing when I was bored?

I probably scrolled tumblr (it was much funnier back then), I also watched a lot of YouTube. But still I can’t believe i did it as frequently and mindlessly as I watch reels rn. And also the length of videos were significantly longer. I feel like I really enjoyed watching them, I could focus on the whole piece or kept coming back to rewatch them.

But it wasn’t all I did. I was reading A LOT. Both fanfictions and books. There was a time when I rather took a book with me to the bathroom instead of my phone.

Most of the time I wasn’t even able to buy books so I borrowed them from library. It always made me so happy when I was able to lay my hands on the book I waited so long in the queue. I also often borrowed books or mangas from my friends. We read the same so we could after talk about it.

I also watched more tv series or movies, even when I had to become Jack Sparrow to get them. I felt so rewarded when I was able to find a movie in good quality and show it proudly to my family.

I played The Sims a lot (I didn’t have much more games than that). Now i get bored after the loading screen.

Even my phone was different back then. I used it to play old android games, those pixel-like, without ads. I remember how creative I felt imagining in my head full movie about what I saw in the form of pixels.

I also had my separate mp4 player where I hoarded my downloaded edits and amvs. I would watch them on repeat, cause I didn’t have access to internet all the time. Same with music, just kept re-listening to what I already had there.

The internet were in the computer, in my laptop. I had to open it to get there, to open tumblr, to open YouTube.

I had so much less then but I did so much more.

Now I have easy access to everything but I barely want to do anything.

And yeah, I barely forgot - I was writing SO MUCH. I kept my big ass a4 notebook where I was writing my first book. Then I carried around little family laptop that was kindly given to me when my dad got better one for himself. I took this super slow netbook everywhere where I could and just. Kept. Writing.

Of course I procrastinated too. I had undiagnosed depression since I was like 13. So I struggled anyway. Maybe it’s the nostalgia speaking. But I also remember how I was dealing with my depression, and it wasn’t through watching reels mindlessly. I was actually trying to process through consuming and creating.

I’m still trying to live like that today but it feels so much harder.

I don’t really know if this post has a conclusion. I just want that feeling back - the feeling of morning with book instead dommscrolling. Or evening with playing the sims instead of rotting on tik tok.

Shadow leapt onto the arena. The soles of his air shoes struck the sandy ground, kicking up a bit of dust into the air. He moved toward Sonic, who was still waving at the cheering crowd gathered in the stands, a wide smile on his face.

The blue hedgehog’s ear twitched at the scraping sound of Shadow’s boots, but he didn’t turn to him or stop what he was doing.

Shadow came to a halt right behind him.

“Having fun?” he asked roughly. His voice was icy, low and sharp.

Sonic blinked, then without lowering his hand turned his head toward Shadow, tilting it slightly. “Huh…?”

Something in that reaction made Shadow’s stomach tighten, while at the same time his blood began to boil. His eyes burned with accusation.

“That’s your answer?” He crossed his arms over his chest, barely holding back his fury. “You disappeared without a word and you’re here, wasting time.” He shook his head. “This is pointless”, he murmured to himself. Then, looking back at Sonic, he continued with a sarcastic scoff: “Are you coming home, or do you plan to bask in your glory a little longer?”

Sonic let out a quiet chuckle, but it was somehow distracted, the kind that barely acknowledged Shadow’s presence. He turned back to the crowd, continuing to wave at them with a steady hand. “Home? This is my home,” he said smoothly. “I’m the Champion, after all.”

The words were spoken so easily, so casually, that at first Shadow almost didn’t register them.

Then his gaze sharpened.

Sonic’s fur, in the golden sunlight beneath a cloudless sky, wasn’t as blue as it should have been. It looked duller, dusty; clumped in places and streaked with something darker, like carelessly and not fully wiped, dried blood.

His posture, though seemingly relaxed and confident, seemed to carry a certain weight.

But it was his face that caught Shadow’s attention the most. His smile was too wide, his eyes too bright. There was exhaustion hidden behind them.

Yes—Sonic looked exhausted, like he was running on fumes.

“…Sonic.” Shadow’s voice lost its edge, becoming something closer to concern. “Are you okay?”

Sonic glanced at him briefly, his smile not wavering in the slightest. “Never been better,” he replied. His tone was almost as confident and arrogant as always.

Almost.

Shadow focused his gaze on the object resting on Sonic’s head. It resembled a crown—or rather, a laurel wreath—and it was made of a golden, metallic material. The sunlight reflected off its surface, refracting within it.

Shadow’s expression darkened. He looked Sonic in the eyes.

“Do you even know how much time has passed since you’ve been gone?” Shadow asked. His voice was quiet, but heavy.

Sonic, in contrast, gave a light shrug. “Not sure what you’re talking about, but does it matter?”

Shadow’s stomach tightened again, this time not with anger, but with deep unease. “It matters because your friends are looking for you. They’re worried about you.”

Sonic blinked, somewhat absentmindedly. His hand hesitated for a moment.

“…My… friends?”

Shadow felt the air leave his lungs. “Yes. Your friends. Tails, Amy, Knuckles. Me.”

Sonic’s expression flickered with confusion for a second, but then the hedgehog laughed, as if the very idea wasn’t even worth mentioning.

A lump formed in Shadow’s throat.

He took a slow step forward, feeling a tightness in his chest. “Sonic, do you… do you know who I am?”

Sonic’s gaze drifted over him, and for the first time Shadow realized how shallow it was, as if Sonic was looking through him, not at him.

At last, Sonic lowered his hand and turned fully toward him, casually resting one hand on his hip. Then, with an almost amused smirk, he said:

“Sure I know. You’re one of my fans, right?”

Shadow froze in place.

His brows drew together, his hands curling into fists on their own.

He exhaled sharply through his nose, forcing the storm rising inside him to settle, at least for a moment.

Then his darkened gaze lifted.

Among the mindlessly cheering crowd, one figure stood out, seated in something like a private box. Dressed in long robes, their face hidden behind a golden jackal-shaped mask that shimmered in the sunlight.

Shadow’s instincts screamed at him.

This was wrong. All of this was wrong.

He clenched his teeth hard.

His body moved faster than his mind. He turned back to Sonic, grabbing his arm and gripping it tightly. “I don’t know what the hell is going on here, but I’m getting you out of here.”

Sonic flinched at the touch, then instinctively pulled back, wrenching himself free.

“Hey, easy there, buddy,” he said lightly, but now, as Shadow noticed, almost absent. “I can’t play favorites. I’ve got plenty of fans counting on me.” His expression was a strange mix of pride and uncertainty, as if he knew this place meant something to him, but not quite why.

Before Shadow could react, a new voice cut in:

“Exactly. He is exactly where he belongs.”

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Hi!! I’m sorry for finding your message only now 🫠