It’s an absolutely gorgeous day outside and yet I have no will to pull up the black out blinds and pull myself from my bed. I don’t want to face outside, I just want to not exist. I haven’t felt this low and lonely for a long time, the last time I was this low I almost did something stupid. I don’t think there’s anyone to save me this time. Am I worth saving though?
I barely post here, so why now? Because I have no one else to talk to, they all think I’m better. I’m not on pills anymore so I have to be cured right? But I’ve never felt so worthless. I have never felt so empty. It’s not even self-pity or sadness anymore. It’s just nothing, I feel nothing. I just want someone to lie to me, to tell me it’ll be okay. That I will be better, one day. My life isn’t always going to be a ball of nothing.
