Mia_675

but have you considered: gay

My life motto

Ok moving on. i think ilya would genuinely want to carry their baby and is upset he cant. he has pregnancy dreams. he has a nursery pinterest board. hes on baby name forums roasting the ugly ones. hes looking up stroller and crib reviews. sometimes the top wants to get knocked up ok

If Ilya and Shane actually wrestled like no holds barred to the death full competition mode rough and tumble fighting, I think most of the time Shane would win. Shane is used to Ilya throwing him around and pinning him down, but Ilya gets tossed to the ground once and gets so turned on he passes out. Shane yells at him and pins him and he just gives up because he's so horny he cannot actually think. Their friends are like oh my god Shane you're hurting him! And Ilya is lying there under him so so so pleased like yayyyy I love being pinned by my huge sexy jock boyfriend #mysexyjockboyfriend DO NOT SAVE HIM he is exactly where he wants to be!!

I believe #inmyheart that ‘which one of them is stronger’ changes throughout the season, but they never know when exactly it’s going to flip, and I think this adds extra fun to their wrestling

dick so good you start plotting and scheming

Ilya is so lucky that Shane proposed. Ilya would have been a nervous fucking wreck for the entire day beforehand. Wake up in the morning. Look in the mirror. Today's the day. Sob. Breathe. Okay I'm good! Turn around and Shane's hair is all in his face, still asleep on Ilya's pillow. I am NOT good. Cold shower. Breakfast that Ilya does not eat. Morning jog wherein Ilya runs like someone is chasing him. Lunch that Ilya does not eat. Drive out to the cottage. Make Shane pull over because Ilya needs to dry heave on the side of the road. "Baby we don't have to drive out today if you're not feeling well." "NO WE HAVE TO." Get to the cottage. Immediately send Shane on some kind of extended fool's errand. Shane wants to stay because Ilya is SHAKING and he is so worried. "No my love I'm fine it's just the breeze off the lake haha." It's thirty fuckig degrees Celsius. Shane finally gtfo's. Yuna, David, Rose FUCKING Landry all descend to help Ilya set up. Well. Ilya is supposed to be helping but he is standing on the deck fully dissociating. Yuna brings him tea. "Are you going to throw up the tea?" "Yes probably." Yuna takes away the tea. 800 electronic tea lights on the deck. In a parallel Ilya has no way of understanding, he both puts on and takes off a suit. Yuna fixes his curls into the hockey boy quasi-mullet that magnetizes Shane's fingers to Ilya's hair and says, "Oh, you're so handsome!" Ilya cries big fat tears. David tells a story about how his proposal to Yuna almost didn't happen because David went to the hospital for heart palpitations that morning. Thank You David That Does Not Help Even Remotely. Ilya slav squats on the lawn for twenty minutes. Shane's car pulls up in the driveway and everyone hides while Ilya vibrates in the entryway. Shane has no less than thirty grocery bags hanging from his arms, still complaining about why the grocery service cancelled their delivery last minute. Ilya leads Shane and all thirty of his grocery bags onto the deck. Shane is doing his favorite thing (bitching) and his second favorite thing (Follow Ilya) so he doesn't notice his own mother tiptoing behind him collecting the grocery bags he drops like breadcrumbs. There is an Oscar-winning actress hiding under his sofa and Shane does not notice because Ilya takes him on the deck and drops to his knees and Shane is like, "Haha, right now?" and then he sees that Ilya has a look on his face like he's just been told the sun is never coming up again and he has his hands on Shane's knees and he is saying, "Shane. Please?" and Shane puts his hands on his head and says "Oh my God baby what's happening to you" as Ilya melts and melts and then from the depths of the cottage someone who sounds a lot like Shane's very own father is whispering "The ring the ring" and when he looks back down Ilya is fumbling a ring box out of his pocket. The first picture of their proposal is Shane glaring into the middle distance with a hand cradling Ilya's curls like a baby while Ilya ugly sobs into his knee.

I just imagine that once they're on the same team Hollanov aren't really interested in like romantic PDA, but they are VERY interested in being physical with each other in the way athletes are. The first time Shane knocks helmets with him on the way into the tunnel, Ilya freezes, smiling with so much delight that Bood has to be like "Tighten up Cap! You see him all the time!" The first time Ilya snaps a towel at Shane has him laughing like Ilya is a physical comedy genius. The first time Shane chirps Ilya for missing a pass on the power play and Ilya puts him in a headlock to mess up his hair and then they start roughhousing like kids they both get so hard in their pants they better thank god for jock straps and cups. Like, this is their language. Camaraderie, fraternity, chirps, roasting, wrestling—now they get to have it together, for once.

those big strong silly boys are always doing some weird shit with their bodies together. shane is attempting squats while ilya is clinging to his back. they're sprinting as fast they can while barefoot on the grass at the cottage just to see who can run 100 metres the fastest. they're climbing trees and doing back flips off the dock. they're taking turns tackling each other and seeing who can hold their ground the longest. ilya's flexing his abs and telling shane to hit him as hard as he can in the stomach ("I'm not going to hit you as hard as I can" "oh my god you are so boring"). and well, of course the wrestling,

@junkdrawertales how does it feel being the ask that created an essential brick in the shallergies lore for so many people

wonderful. I love inflicting miseries on blorbo. I’d like to thank the academy, my fellow nominees, and whichever of my ancestors first mutated an allergic gene

I think this fandom wants to do an opposite attracts thing with them and we must resist.