vergissmeinnicht

you should really get comfortable believing in love and magic and whimsy or you’ll continue to live a half-life for the rest of the time you have on earth

Born without the gene that makes you want to listen to other people’s DnD campaigns

pasta is so comforting. pasta is my best friend. pasta my beloved. pasta is my boyfriend pasta is a god pasta is the breeze in my hair in the weekend pasta is a relaxing thought!!!

coworker today was talking about how she tries to drive less to reduce her carbon footprint, so instead of ordering takeout she orders delivery. when I pointed out that this actually results in the exact same amount of emissions because the same amount of driving happens she said "yeah but it's not me driving." and I feel like any critique of progressive individualism I could make based on this would fall flat because like. what else is there to say? she summed up the flaws of individualist environmentalism better than most critics could, without intending to.

i would die alone and have my carcass be eaten by vultures before i talk to chatgpt like it's my boyfriend

A simple green onion will rock your world

hey, does anyone want to lock antlers and drown together in a cold lake? it has to be weird.

the way trump is talking abt hillary makes him sound like a scorned lover lmao what if monica wasn’t bill’s only side bitch??

you gotta be fucking kidding me