~ 𝓜𝓮𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓸 𝓛𝓸𝓾 ~

☆.𓋼𓍊 𓆏 𝓟𝓻𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓼𝓮 𓍊𓋼𓍊.☆

I don’t think I can handle a, relationship ~

Often times I find myself, feeling sick ~

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

And I can’t help it, I don’t know why.

Always wanna be by your side.

In my head, a white picket fence, Maybe couple a kids... I’ve been doomed since we met.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

I really wanna scream— Everything you do to me Feels so perfect, feels so good.

You never get me misunderstood.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

I’ve given myself away, Too many people have kissed my face...

But none of them felt as good as you.

That I promise, and that is true.

(That I promise) (That I promise) That I promise, that is true.

You love me, and I love you.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

I could never find my way out of my self-dug grave,

Until she let her hair down, and I pulled myself out.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

I’m so scared, I’m terrified— That she’ll leave me dead inside.

Heart beating fast, I can’t even blink.

Kissing the blade, it always stings.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

I really wanna scream— Everything you do to me Feels so perfect, feels so good.

You never get me misunderstood.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

I’ve given myself away, Too many people have kissed my face...

But none of them felt as good as you.

That I promise, and that is true.

(That I promise) (That I promise)

That I promise, and that is true.

You love me, and I love you.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

I promise you, I promise you. I promise you, I promise you.

That it’s true.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

I promise you, Promise you, Promise you, Promise you.

It’s true.

Prom

Homecoming

Clubs

Studying

Parties

Friends

Self esteem

Urgency

Motivation

Healthy Hobbies

Maybe next time, that sounds like fun looking back.

Missing it now feels pathetic

But I still think about that bittersweet seventeen year old often

20 something years later and I still don’t know what to do with my hands

Whether it’s walking

Talking

Or driving

They need to be occupied

Perpetually walking with my head down to look at my phone

I make eye contact and start adjusting my sleeves or run a finger under my eye

Or spin a bottle cap in my hand while zoning out on the 405

My hands are so lonely

And blaming another for that feels childish

4 years later and my hands were never held

No matter how much I begged

4 years is how long it took for me to bleed out

4 years later and I’m still trying to find some feeling in my hands

My begging hands that only knew compromise

All I want

Is to lay down

And the only thing on my mind

To be to sleep

How many more nights of feeling like this

₊˚ʚ 💙 ₊˚✧ ﾟ𝒮𝓃𝓊𝑔𝑔𝓁𝑒𝒷𝓊𝑔₊˚ʚ 💙 ₊˚✧ ﾟ

You're as beautiful As the day I left • ｡⋆𓇼˚ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 ˚ 𓇼⋆ ｡ •

I was delusional A victim of theft

• ｡⋆𓇼˚ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 ˚ 𓇼⋆ ｡ •

Kisses and wishes the words won't come out Red flower petals they fill up my mouth Lying and crying to see you again I should've never said this is the end

• ｡⋆𓇼˚ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 ˚ 𓇼⋆ ｡ •

She's got the spare keys to my car I should've let her in my heart San Diego isn't so far Two hours and I'm in your arms

• ｡⋆𓇼˚ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 ˚ 𓇼⋆ ｡ •

I didn't think I'd regret All of the things I had said It feels weird to meet you here We were in the same car last year

• ｡⋆𓇼˚ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 ˚ 𓇼⋆ ｡ •

Kisses and wishes the words won't come out Red flower petals they fill up my mouth Lying and crying to see you again I should've never said this is the end

• ｡⋆𓇼˚ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 ˚ 𓇼⋆ ｡ •

I was a fool I fucked up I miss you so fucking much Thought I was cool without your touch I need you

My Snugglebug

• ｡⋆𓇼˚ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 ˚ 𓇼⋆ ｡ •

I'm glad you're fucking happy (without me) I wish that it was with me with

• ｡⋆𓇼˚ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 ˚ 𓇼⋆ ｡ •

You really like her but what about me? You held my hand in Rueben's backseat

꒰ঌ ᡣ𐭩 ໒꒱ 𝒲𝑜𝓇𝓁𝒹'𝓈 𝐵𝑒𝓈𝓉 𝐸𝓍-𝐵𝑜𝓎𝒻𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹 ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

No I can’t take it back

No matter how hard I try

You’ve made up your mind

No such thing as second chances

When you’ve put true love on the line

༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚. ༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚. ༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.

Did you have a heart attack 

Come lay on my chest

Don’t worry — no strings attached

You don’t want me like that

But I’ll keep on

Talking just to make it last

༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.

San Diego fairy

Come and carry

My heart in your hands again

Even if you scare me

Bloody Mary,

I’m the World’s Best Ex-Boyfriend

༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.

You never asked but I'll still stay

I’m the best mistake you could ever make 

Say you don’t miss me, say we’re just fine

Then why do you take up most of my time

༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.

I’ll fake a smile and take the blame

I’ll nod when they bring up your name

Say I’m happy, say I’m fine

You moved on and I don’t mind

༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.

San Diego fairy

Come and carry

My heart in your hands again

Even if you scare me

Bloody Mary

I’m the World’s Best Ex-Boyfriend

༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.

I’ll bite my tongue I’ll play pretend

I’ll raise a glass to you and them

Even if it kills me in the end

The end

༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.

I promise you’ve made it awfully clear 

You don't want me near

Baby you’re giving me tears

Oh no

Oh no

Oh no ~

༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.

San Diego fairy

Come and carry

My heart in your hands again

Even if you scare me

Bloody Mary

I’m the World’s Best Ex-Boyfriend

༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.༊࿐ ͎. ｡˚ ° ⊹ ˚.

San Diego fairy

Come and carry

My heart in your hands again

Even if you scare me

Bloody Mary

I’m the World’s Best Ex-Boyfriend

San Diego Fairy

Come & Carry My heart in your hands AGAIN

✧°. ⋆₊˚⊹♡⊹˚₊⋆ .°✧

Every time I look at my polaroids, I wish I could step through them.

But No One Would Be There NO ONE

✧°. ⋆₊˚⊹♡⊹˚₊⋆ .°✧

I can’t help & smile.

I was there, my friends, & my camera. We went & used all the film!

I’ve thrown out the ones that mean the most to me.

✧°. ⋆₊˚⊹♡⊹˚₊⋆ .°✧

Oh no, maybe in a better life, I’ll have reason to keep them.

I’m glad I have these though.

✧°. ⋆₊˚⊹♡⊹˚₊⋆ .°✧

I was really happy these days.

SOMEWHERE BETWEEN:

🚶‍♂️ Footsteps fading into cracked asphalt 🚶‍♀️

✨ & a question the road keeps asking ✨

☆ - 𝐿𝑜𝓋𝑒𝒷𝒾𝓇𝒹𝓈 & 𝐻𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓉𝒷𝑒𝒶𝓉𝓈 - ⋆｡°✩

SAME EYES, DIFFERENT SOULS. ✧

— Like looking into a mirror,