I don't need roses

Megan had hoped after the last visit to the jail she was prepared for what was to come.  If anything she was relieved that Oz had agreed to see her and that Tybalt hadn’t forbidden her from attending because regardless of what bravado she pretended to have if he had refused to allow her then she would have been forced to cancel.  While she felt the security he insisted on sending with her was unnecessary her thoughts changed when she arrived at the prison, a far more intimidating place than the jail had been.

The building was bigger, the guards all appeared massive and the security checks that she had to go through to get into the visiting area were far more thorough but she tried not to let it bother her.  It wasn’t until she was led into the room where she was finally going to see Oz that the full reality of the situation hit her.  She was told to take a seat and the glass partition in front of her made her want to scream.  Taking in the rest of the room she knew she needed to calm herself down so she focused on her breathing, praying silently that she could hold it together.

Oz: 

Oz felt despair like he had experienced at no time before in his life. As a child, life had been difficult and occasionally brutal. But he had his sister, Nox and even the occasional adult who took an interest. As an adult, he had experienced many challenges but he always had the net that was the Montague family. Leading them had honed his purpose and provided him a reason to work through his darkest moments, such as when his one and only attempt at a claim had failed so dramatically and painfully. Now, to know that people thought him capable of this … the murder of an innocent submissive … it broke something in him. 

As he was escorted into the visitor’s room, he slid into the stool and looked through the glass at Megan but it was a hollow version of the man he used to be. Taking a breath, he picked up the receiver and waited until she did the same. “Hello Megan.”

Megan:

There was something so different about the man who vwalked towards her.  She could tell herself that it was the situation, the totally unnecessary glass separating them or the clothes he was wearing but she knew that wasn’t it.  There was a change in the way he presented himself, not the confident and assured figure she knew so well.  He looked smaller somehow and the anger that she had felt, the things she wanted to say to him melted away and she desperately just wanted to hold him though she knew that there was no possibility of that.

“Hello Sir,” she replied.  Not Master, that was no longer appropriate but the fact she chose not to use his name surprised her.  Maybe in some small way she wanted to emphasise that he was still a Dominant, however changed he appeared.  “Thank you for seeing me.  I really appreciate it.”

Oz:

The title surprised him but Megan had always possessed an elegant manner. It was one of the reasons he had been drawn to her. One of many. His lips curved into a small smile although there was a lack of warmth or light in his typically bright gaze. “I have to admit that I was surprised to get your letter. I am …” He choked on the word slightly, clearing his throat, “so sorry for the pain you must be enduring. Are you well? Have you been taking your medication?” He couldn’t stop himself from asking. He could never stop worrying about her.

Megan:

Her face must have shown the confusion she felt as he immediately apologised to her.  That had not been what she expected.  Before she could respond though he asked after her health and her body tensed.  Taking a second she smiled weakly, “I’ve erm...I had a bit of a set back.  I was back in hospital for a few days but I’m fine now.   They just changed my medication again.”  She looked over at him as she said the words, knowing she could never lie to him and that to sit here and say anything else, for him to know she was lying would be worse than just admitting the truth.

Oz:

Oz sighed, “I was worried about that. I am glad they are monitoring it well. I hope you are remembering to take the recovery time you need.” He offered up quietly, knowing damn well she didn’t listen to him about that when they were together so he had even less expectation now that she would do as he asked. He loathed the partition. He missed the very scent of her and in this place, he couldn’t see that silken skin so close to his own. Or smell her subtle perfume. Sighing again, he continued, “You asked to see me so I am assuming it has something to do with you entering a new claim. I hope you know I only want you to be happy Megan. You don’t need anything from me to have that …” He smiled, this time more genuinely, “You never really did need much from me. Good thing too because I don’t have anything left.”

Megan:

“I have several people forcing me to do as my doctor orders,” she sighed though there was a slight lilt of laughter behind it.  “Disadvantage of living at the Estate is there is always someone there.”  He had already surprised her with his earlier questions but nothing shocked her as much as the assumption he had reached and she quickly shook her head.  “I’m not entering a claim.  My relationship ended several months ago.”  She bit down on her lip as she considered how much to say but in the end chose not to elaborate further.  “I was given back the deeds to the lodge and the villa,” she said instead after a moment.  “You kept them in my name?” 

Oz:

Oz’s smile warmed as he nodded, “Sounds like what you need.” He murmured, shaking his head. “Disadvantage? More like where you should be right now. With family.” That fundamental division had never been sorted in their claim. His family was never her family. “Oh… I apologize. I have to admit I am surprised.” He nodded, “I bought them for you. I was advised by the real property lawyers that I would need a signed power of attorney from you to sell them but I just … couldn’t do it.” He swallowed hard, “Of course, now you can do as you wish with them. Sell them, burn them down, whatever you wish. They were always yours.” he acknowledged with a nod. He had never been able to sell those properties, particularly the lodge as it brought back so many memories. The summer house was purchased with some hope for their future and when it all came crashing down, it had hurt to even look at that particular sheif of documentation. All that optimism crushed under the weight of the realization that he had not and would never be enough for her. 

Megan:

“We discovered that we were fundamentally incompatible, it was better to end as friends than……” She didn’t finish the sentence, the words were too painful.  His practical explanation over the properties was understandable but stung.  In her head he had kept them because of the sentiment but she had been fooling herself again.  Of course they had been retained for legal reasons, though she scoffed laughingly at his suggestions.  She knew she could never visit the villa, she had planned a trip there for them together but it never happened and the mere thought of the place was tainted.  Megan had already decided that she would sell it as soon as she could but the lodge presented more of an emotional connection that she still hadn’t dealt with or decided on.

His somewhat clinical reply reminded her of something else she needed to understand and she paused for a moment before she spoke.  “I need to know, to understand why you didn’t testify at your trial.  You watched me be grilled on our relationship, details of how I feel about you displayed for everyone.  All those others who spoke in your defence.  I don’t understand why you didn’t speak up.  Why wouldn’t you tell them your side?  That you never did her any harm?”  Her gaze sought out his steel eyes, “Please, I need to understand.” 

Oz:

“I’m sorry to hear that Megan. Truly. I thought you were in a good place.” He murmured quietly, frankly a bit surprised that it had not worked out better for the submissive. “But then again, you were always fine on your own and I’m sure you are doing well now. As soon as all this dies down, you can go back to your regular life.” Oz assured. That was what he needed to believe. That Megan wouldn’t be embroiled in this nightmare any longer than she needed to be. 

The question surprised him, “I appreciate your testimony. Everyone was so …” His mind flashed to Posey Capulet’s hysterics on the stand and a piece of him wondered if he was more the monster the Prosecutor claimed him to be. “There were two reasons …. I was advised by several competent lawyers that doing so would not improve my case or its outcome. Also … and most pressingly, I could not subject myself to cross-examination on Montague affairs. I quite simply had a great deal of information that revealing would hurt the family.” He met her eyes and a glimmer of the man he used to be resurfaced for a moment, “The family comes before everything, even me.” He broke the eye contact and looked down again, “I am sorry if you felt humiliated by revealing so much personal information with no reciprocal moment from me.  Is there something you wanted to know?”

Megan:

“Yes, things will settle soon and I will be able to return to my apartment,” she agreed.  There was no point arguing the rest.  He had told her the last time he wanted to imagine her happy and settled so she was content to let him.  She could cope on her own but it didn’t make her happy.  However with each failed relationship she was beginning to think that there was something wrong with her and that she would be better just staying alone.  However she did not share any of that with Oz.  The news of her relapse had been enough negative news for the one visit.

Her gaze met his as he explained the reasoning and she had to confess she had never anticipated the Montague family to be the reason he didn’t speak.  The annoyance that she had felt over him not defending himself ebbed away a bit more as she knew what he said was true, family came before everything.  “I’m sorry, I didn’t think about that,” she confessed quietly, appreciating again the massive role he had held.