*Dying Whale Noises*

48 years ago a girl said “oh fuck me” to her best friend while walking in the street, a guy who randomly passed by answered by “let me at least buy you dinner first”. I present to you my grandparents, in love since then and celebrating their 47 years of marriage today.

grandpa got game

ok what the fuck

It sounds like some digital boss theme

@king-among-knights

snoof snoof

If they truly value you, they won’t do shit that would lose you. Simple.

guys i’m screaming there’s this person going around my town stealing christmas lights and the cops were like “hey :) if you turn yourself in we won’t arrest you :) we’ll give you some eggnog and buy you lights and everything :)” oh my god do the cops think people are just stupid what an obvious trap dhhdhdhd

They will never fucking know!

I swear. But I could still send a 2 paragraph text in 30seconds.

If you go north for long enough you end up going south but you can go east forever without going west

the glow after crying is such #a look

dude

having a job is so weird like I can literally just…. buy shit

We out here buying shit

yes bitch we are purchasing shit and fuck