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Book Review: Malcolm Gladwell’s Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know about the People We Don’t Know

I just finished listening to Malcolm Gladwell’s latest audiobook and I highly recommend it, for a number of reasons. 

Least among them is the fact that this was the first audiobook I’ve ever listened to that wasn’t first a print book that was simply read into audio form, but instead was a fully and very professionally produced audiobook in its original iteration. The music and actual interview…

So How Do You Define "Culture" Anyway? How important IS culture to a company's bottom line; and what is it exactly?

Someone asked me the other day what the “culture” of a company referred to. Immediately I felt like giving them St. Augustine’s definition of time: “As long as you don’t ask me what it is, I know; as soon as you ask me, I don’t.”

For me, culture is a number of things. First of all, it includes why the organization exists in the first place. Most people would say that for many companies, this…

Emotional Aikido? When our emotions don't seem to be on our side, is it better to fight against them or try redirecting them toward our goals?

Most of us have at least heard of the Japanese Martial Art named Aikido. One of its main principles is the use of an attacker’s momentum against them. This allows much smaller and physically weaker practitioners to best much larger and stronger opponents who rely on brute strength alone.

Well, it turns out that our emotions work in much the same way.

Have you ever tried to will yourself…

Something interesting happened to me the other day. I received a rather peculiar request, out of the blue, by a prospective client. There was nothing inherently wrong with the request — it didn’t violate any core principles or values of mine; it just struck me as a bit bizarre.

My knee-jerk reaction to the request was to politely decline it. I didn’t have to think much about it; there was just…

The Power of Belief: A Two-Edged Sword?

I’ve been reading pretty extensively about the period leading up to and following the Second World War. One idea keeps coming back again and again: The sheer power of a few people’s beliefs was able to radically and irrevocably change the world.

Few of us would doubt the power of beliefs. Every act of design, every effort to construct something new is an act of belief. Faith is what enables…

Emotional Intelligence or Slavery?

We have all seen the Snickers commercial: “You’re not yourself when you’re hungry!” We have all experienced times when losing it emotionally at work or in our personal lives has cost us. I can think of more than a few.

But now, it seems that everywhere I turn, I hear about the importance of emotional intelligence (EQ): “EQ is essential for leadership! You can’t be effective in sales without…

Is Your Focus on Results Holding You Back?

Being “results-focused” is one of the absolute badges of honor in any organization. We all want results, accomplishment, to get things done. No one wants to be the air-brained, constantly distracted, perpetually unfocused, time-wasting team member that never gets anything done, right?

But, what if the most damaging thing you could do to your bottom line is to make results your absolute first…

No Pain, No Gain?

“Embrace the hurt, people! Love the burn! No pain, no gain!” Once again, I asked myself why I paid good money for people to devise creative ways to subject me to sheer agony.

Grace was the W.O.D. or “workout of the day” (with no relation with the theological concept). I was only on rep number 19 of 30 and most of the others had already finished. I was thinking I might be finished too.

Then…

What’s In It For Me?

Anyone who has read my articles knows my belief in the importance of a healthy culture in any human organization, be it a for-profit company, a non-for-profit, a church, club, association, or even a family. But when it comes to business, how important is it really?

The short answer is: it depends.

Can people who hate to work together get things done? Sure. Can people who fundamentally…

A Celebration of Our Values

In my 20’s I spent almost a decade overseas in Europe and South America. During that time I became influenced by the prevailing European animosity toward America and everything she stood for. I’m not proud of those sentiments as I look back on them today. In many ways, the political division in our country today reminds me of those same sentiments. As I try to explain the significance and…

Is Your Team a Revolving Door?

Turnover. The very word strikes fear in the hearts of leaders everywhere. A leader once told me: “The only thing worse than having someone who is a bad fit on my team is the time and effort it takes to replace them.”

We all know the time and effort involved in constantly having to find, hire, and train new people for our teams. It is a wonder that we’re able to get anything else done.

But…

Do As I Say, Not As I Do

The manager of a 20 person team confessed to me that he was struggling with some of his team members who do not accept feedback well: “I feel like every time I have to give feedback I’m walking on eggshells.” Most managers have had a team member or two on their teams who doesn’t take constructive criticism well. But, that’s on them, right? I mean, there’s nothing a manager can do to help their…

I Can’t Give What I Don’t Have

In the Christian tradition, Christmas is the celebration of God’s gift of himself to us as a little child. This is a gift of love.

As I reflect over this past year (as I often do at this time), I have recognized a special lesson that I have learned this year: I can’t give what I don’t have.

As I am sure is the case with many of us, I have the strong and sometimes desperate desire to be a…

Which Is Better: Soccer or Golf?

I had an interesting conversation today with a tax consultant from a multinational consulting firm we all would recognize. He was struggling with the way his team is performing. But, as it turns out, he is really not leading a team at all.

I admit that defining terms is often arbitrary, to be taken with a grain of salt, but a common nomenclature is necessary — if only to be able to have a…

The Diamond Ring Hiring Test

One of my sharpest emotional crashes happened in Chinatown. I started out on cloud nine; I just got engaged to the man I loved, and was out celebrating with friends and family.

I showed the diamond ring on my finger time and again, until interest in the rock was replaced by enthusiasm for the sights, smells and tastes as we walked up and down the streets of Chinatown, in and out of stores and…

How to Hire Winners Every Time

Have you ever had that sinking feeling that you made a terrible mistake in hiring someone? We’ve all been there.

Most of us have experienced it: the sneaking suspicion when we first meet that person, the growing excitement as we get to know him or her better and then the fateful question we ask ourselves, “Could this be the person that could bring us to the next level?”

We do our due diligence,…

How MLM Is Killing My Friendships

Does anyone else cringe when friends text you about their latest MLM product? “Let’s grab drinks,” they say, or “we should catch up sometime.” My heart usually responds with something that, oddly, feels like grief.

I want to be happy for my friends who feel financially empowered by these new ways of making money and “owning their business” while working from home, taking care of their kids, and…