heyo plat / matchamida here. I write mostly for Haikyuu!!, maybe pokemon, maybe fire emblem, and perhaps genshin in the future đ ask â quotev â ao3
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Kuroo betrays you in a way youâd never imagine heâd do.
âI canât believe you.â
You hardly recognize the trembling venom in your voice as Kuroo tears his gaze away from yours with a grimace. âI canât believe you. How could you do this to me?â
You canât see straight. You donât know where to look. The one whom you once proudly labeled a friend just shatters your trust in one moment. You donât know whether to scream or throw the object in your hand at him. Both options are satisfying, but they wonât fix what has already been doneâall you know is that every fiber of your being longs for Kuroo to rot in hell.
Even Kenma, who mistakenly thought he had grown used to your playful theatrics, was taken aback by the animosity. He didnât think what Kuroo did was serious, but you look ready to rip him to shreds. His eyes dart back and forth between you and Kuroo, who finally faces you with furrowed brows.
âYou donât understandââ
âReally?â you cut in, seething. âYouâre gonna use that card on me? I guess itâs fine since you already threw me into that mess.â
âI had no choice!â he finally snaps in frustration. âIf it was the other way around, you wouldâve done the same!â
âThen you should know I wouldnât betray you like that,â you spat. âThree years of friendship, and you pull shit like this. Get out.â
Kenmaâs eyes widen. Surely you arenât serious?
âIâm serious,â you say loudly. âGet out. Get out!â
Kuroo glances at Kenma with bewilderment. âHey now,â he tries placating. âWe could try fixingââ
You arenât done. âI will not be expected to put up with this snake behavior in my own house, in my own room, and on my own file of Mario Kart! Get the hell outta here before I blue-shell your ass in real life.â
You raise your controller high above your head menacingly.
Kuroo quickly stands up. From the screen, victory music loops, as well as the highlights of Peach blue-shelling Shy Guy right before the finish line. No one moves a muscle, and Kenma is starting to think that accepting the invitation to hang out at your house is a mistake.
Then, you lower the controller with a pleased smile. Kuroo relaxes with the shit-eating grin that everyone in the room is all too familiar with.
âWeâre such good actors,â you say.
âWe oughtta be on the Oscars,â adds Kuroo.
âMake our debut in Hollywood.â
âBetter get that acting degree first.â
âOh? You think you got time to join the theater club?â
He bats his eyes. âAnything is possible when youâre here with me.â
âOh Kuroo!â you cry dramatically. âI see you havenât betrayed our friendship! Let us mend it even stronger!â
Kuroo joins along. âLetâs!â
As the two of you break down into ugly cackles, Kenma hopes a blue-shell flies in and puts him out of his misery.
If anyoneâs interested to learn more! I was so impressed how accurate the details were about the reader and even showed me things I didnât think too hard about but unconsciously wrote đ
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He proceeded to rant about how disrespectful Oikawa was, how weird he was, how ugly he was, and that he was also smelly, greedy, annoying, bratty, insufferable, incompetent, selfish, stupid, an idiot, a dumbass, a brat (you were unconsciously tapping your finger to this decent beat he was spitting out), a hog for hogging the calamari, and the way he stuck out his tongue for his profile photo was also egotistical and that you need to delete that, and did I mention ugly? Well, heâs ugly. Oh, and heâs so horrible-looking, his poor mother must regret that slimy thing coming out of her womb, so they probably had an extended stay at the hospital because they were trying to figure out why he was so ugly, and I really shouldâve ran him over when I had the chance, and the only reason why surgeons arenât operating my car out of his organs right now was because there were witnesses, but you should still stay away fromâ
Kazue only stopped when you firmly put your foot down. On his neck.
I am. So in love with ur haikyuu ao3 fics. like god. in the city where we stray is SUCH a cool concept asdkjlfgsfsb
THATS MY NEGLECTED CHILD ⊠đđ I used to update her on kuroos bday but I broke the streaks đđđ as a treat hereâs some wip dialogue paragraphs I have in my drafts
1)
âI told you, Kuroo. I am a connoisseur of⊠kineticussy.â
Kuroo let out a haggard sigh. âYou mean kinetics.â
âThatâs what I said.â
2)
âY'know Kuroo,â you spoke up, âyouâre a nice guy!â
âŠWhat was it about him that people thought he wasnât?
âIâm always this nice,â he stated, a little offended. You heard his tone and squinted.
âI didnât say you werenât.â
âIt sounded like you thought otherwise.â
âI take it back then: real nice guys donât announce theyâre nice guys.â
3)
âIâll prove to you that Iâll be the best cat girl.â
âMy expectations canât go any lower, so⊠I think youâll impress me.â
4)
SCENE: Namazu is oblivious to how jealous she is when she sees Kuroo treating another girl nicely and laughing with her. Namazu and some of the Nekoma team are huddled nearby and watching.
âWhat does that heathen have that I donât,â you sulked moodily.
âA better personality?â
âManners?â
âBetter hair?â
Lev shrugged. âBetter Hygiene? She smells like tulip flowers.â
âEveryone present, go fuck yourselves.â You paused. âBut those were all good roasts.â
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đŒ Help! My Pangoro got me into Debt with the Rust Syndicate! [1/?]
You supposed you knew what you were getting into, raising a Pangoro that was three Corbeaus tall and two and a half Philippes wide. [Corbeau x Reader]
Chapter 1: something about kitakami bamboo
READ ON AO3
ââ-
You were so fucked, and not in a sexy way.
âAnd what will you do to make up for this transgression?â
If you opened your mouth right now, you were guaranteed to say something stupid.Â
âUh⊠good question.â
Point made.Â
Corbeau of the Rust Syndicate didnât react to your nervous smile or the internal scream thatâs powerful enough to take out the building and everyone in it. He only gestured to the sofas at the corner, his glasses dangerously glinting in a way that made you want to bust through the walls.
âItâs rude of me to sit while making a guest stand,â he said. âLetâs make ourselves more comfortable, shall we?â
âOh! Um, thank you.â You hoped there would be some refreshments. Like a cookie. Or two. You were getting kind of hungry.
âPhilippe, if you will.â
The larger man who had been standing at his side moved to yours. âThis way, Miss.â
Corbeau stood, and in that moment, you took in how tallâor more like, how shortâhe was, and your dumb clown brain simply couldn't hold back from imagining him standing in front of the mirror thinking, âAh yes, my height is sure to intimidate the masses. Fear me and my custom-made dripped-out glasses! Heehee!â
Oh no.Â
You sharply inhaled.Â
Oh NO.
His eyes narrowed. âIs there something funny?â
Fuck fuck fuck!Â
You exhaled slowly, willing every muscle in your face to be neutral.
âNo sir,â you said.
But you could feel your eyes twitching and bulging from the sheer effort, so you turned away from his sight and stiffly followed Philippe over to the sofas, feeling the bossâ eyes tracking your every move as his steps quietly shadowed yours.
You tentatively sank into the cushions, a bit surprised when you sank in more than you expected; these were more comfortable than they looked. Philippe set down a tray of water from who-knows-where, and you watched in slight disappointment as he poured a fancy pitcher into a fancy glass. No little snackies at all. Still, Mamaâs words snapped at you to not touch the glass of water. Best that youâre not responsible for breaking another thing of theirs.Â
Corbeau, however, didnât drop the earlier matter as you had hoped. He sat across from you with crossed legs, his shoe barely flat to the floor, and damn it youâre going to lose it if you didnât get your shit together.
âAre you sure? You seemed to be teary-eyed. Please, I insist you enlighten me with the joke thatâs amusing enough to dismiss the severity of the situation that your Pokemon caused.â
And just like that, whatever mirth you had faded and embarrassment flooded your veins. Sometimes, finding humor in stressful situations backfired on you spectacularly. âSorry.â
Corbeau smiled, like he was gloating on shutting you down. âI see youâre catching on. Itâs hardly a laughing matter when the Rust Syndicate suffers property damage. And let me tell youââhis eyes bored into yours, and you never wanted to break eye contact so badââthose bamboo stalks were imported from Johto. Kitakami, to be exact. Have you heard of Kitakami?â
You wisely kept your mouth shut. Do not say anything. Let him talk. Stare at the pointy thing on the bridge of his silly glasses.
âIâve once visited in search of floral arrangements. Surely you know by now that Iâm very particular with how I decorate my interiors and exteriors.â He waved a hand towards the beautiful, carefully arranged rock garden that had been the first thing you looked at when you entered the office. âItâs natural that I pick only the best of the best. You understand, right?â
Not really, was what youâd normally say, but youâre afraid of waking up disoriented in the sewers.
âDuring one of my searches, I came across these unique Pokemon called Polchageist and Sinistcha. Theyâre similar to Sinistea and Polteageist, which are commonly found in Galar, but are a separate species, and more like antiques thatâd fetch a valuable price. I was tempted to catch one, but the grove they lived in was far more interesting.âÂ
Here, Corbeau slightly leaned in, strengthening his gaze with yours and forcing you to break eye contact from nerves. His stupid, stupid intimidation tactics were working! But luckily for you, you had a counterattack.
You took a quick, casual peek at his one foot touching the floor, and all was nearly well again.
âDo you know where those Pokemon lived?â
You looked up again. Was this a rhetorical question? Damn! You couldnât really tell, but decided to go for it.
âAt the bamboo groveâŠ?â you said hesitantly, although you knew it was the right answer.Â
âAt the bamboo grove.â Corbeau leaned back. âI couldnât possibly leave Kitakami empty-handed, not when I knew those bamboo trees perfectly matched my vision of the Rust Syndicate. So I went to Kitakami Hall to find the business that sold them and purchased several young bamboo stalks. The folks there were refusing the initial amount I was offering, saying it was too much, but I told them it was a tip. I like to make sure that everyone knows Iâm a good tipper. Itâs important to support local businesses, after all.â
You didnât really need to know that, but what the hell, sure.Â
âAnd I come back to Lumiose, satisfied and content. My grunts worked to plant them as instructed, and together weâre able to look at the Rust Syndicate with pride for years. So imagine my surprise when I see that theyâre gone from my roof! All that hard work growing them, cultivating them, now mush in a Pangoroâs stomach!â
At the reminder, you shrank into your seat. Maybe if you tried hard enough, the sofa could swallow your existence whole. Or maybe Pangoro should just burst out of your pokeball and eat Corbeau. Well, with his size, heâd probably be an appetizer.
You glanced at Philippe. Pangoro should eat him too.
âAs the trainer,â Corbeau continued, thankfully unaware how hard you were trying not to shake, âyouâre fully responsible for the damages.â
The mention of money sobered you up. âAndâŠâ You swallowed, lightly thumping your chest. âHow much would I be paying?â
This time, Philippe stepped in. âTaking in the fact that theyâre imported goods, the time it took to cultivate, the materials used to flourish them, such as fertilizer, soil, waterââ
And he just kept on listing.
ââthe total would be approximatelyââ
When the amount left his mouth, you immediately concluded it was a made-up number out of denial, because what the fuck was that? You didnât have the funds, not when you splurged most of it on cute cafes and all the food Lumiose alone had to offer. You were in the middle of a solo food tour. In fact, you were on the way to get your hands on those Super Lumiose Galettes that some viral Electross was munching on. That golden brown, buttery crust, and how so many flakes just crumbled as that lucky eel somehow bit into it with only four teeth. Not that its teeth seemed like it was made for eating, but the crunch alone was pure ASMR. And the red jam filling that oozed out⊠You had stopped in your tracks in public and stared at your screen at how it sucked the filling, like you were watching something you werenât supposed to.Â
It made you hungry. And you get hungry often. And you were really hungry now.
Your stomach rumbled. Long and loud. Philippe coughed to the side.
âAnything else to say?â Corbeau asked dryly.
âPangoro and I really enjoyed it, sir,â you blurted. âHe thinks they have a fresh, sweet taste. I told him it was earthy, andââ
He held up a hand to silence you, mouth ajar.
âWhat do you mean by that?â he uttered slowly. âWhat you've just said implies that youâve also eaten the bamboo.â
You looked away in guilt. âUm. Actuallyââ
âYou ate my bamboo?! Are you insane?!â
Gone was the cool, collected, and smug âI-have-control-over-this-conversation-and-you-donâtâ expression, replaced with a harsher, enraged, and confused âhow-and-why-did-you-eat-my-Kitakami-bambooâ one. There was a tense vein on his forehead, ready to burst and beat you to death with veiny arms. Like some rando tourist trespassed on his roof and ate his prized bamboo imported from Kitakami, or something like that.
âMy Pangoro,â you began nervously, âheâs a big boy, you see. The chubbiest fellow out there, like Philippeâthat is to say!â You nearly yelled in horror at your slip-up just as said man made a microscopic reaction at the comparison. âI say it as a compliment, sir, youâre very beautiful and I donât know any other man who can grow metal spikes out of his mutton chops and rock the look!â
âThank you,â Philippe responded neutrally, then added, âthese arenât spikes.â
You couldnât look at either of them now. Not even Corbeauâs foot cheered you up.
âIâm sorry,â you said weakly to both of them. âI-I donât have the money, but Iâll make it up to you somehow!â
Corbeau regarded you with a scowl. âAs expected!â he snapped. âThough, I already doubted you had the funds to begin with. You can instead start by doing some⊠jobs, for us. What do you say?â
Something in the back of your mind warned you that this was a slippery slope. Accept, and you would keep slipping and slipping.
âSurely,â Corbeau drawled, drawing you out of your thoughts again, âyou can imagine what would happen in that dreaming head of yours, if you refuse.â
You blinked, oddly flattered. âHuh? You think Iâm dreamy?â
Now there were three veins on his forehead.
---
âHey, uhâŠâ
âSpit it out.â
âAre you gonna add âproperty consumptionâ to the list, orâŠ?â
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Playing legends ZA and oughhhhh it soooo addictingâŠ. My gacha habits transferred over bc every time I get enough in game money I splurge it all on the cutest clothes