Masyaf Assassin

send me names anonymously and I’ll share my personal experience with the person with that name

aa i know an alex i go to school with them !! theyve been my friend since middle school (they were one of the Cool Upperclassmen i was hella intimidated by and wanted to chill with)

Bees in the movie live in a western-human-style society, complete with two-parent households and college etc, but they still make constant jokes about what bee societies are like in real life

References are made at the beginning of the film to the fact that bees have very short life spans and the main bee characters in the movie are expecting to live for another week at most, but then the movie itself takes place over several weeks or possibly months and they don’t seem to age or die

yes. yes, the bee presumably fucks the human woman

she’s, like, into him, sexually

I know that the weirdness of that is like a central part of why this movie has become a meme but listen: you can’t understand how truly off-putting that whole plot point is until you’ve actually watched it play out in front of your own eyes

the woman is married, too, so like, she has an emotional affair with a bee that drives her husband away in a scene where she tells him that “he’s the nicest bee I’ve met in a long time,” implying that she’s, like, known other bees on a personal level, to which he responds, “what are you talking about?” and you think he’s going to point out the obvious absurdity of her statement but instead he continues with, “are there OTHER bugs in your life?!”

all the bees are heavily coded as Jewish, and there’s a scene where Jerry Seinfeld’s bee parents are like, “do you have a girlfriend? I hope she’s bee-ish! She’s not a wasp, is she?” because… you know… wasp… WASP… get it

there is a Bee Larry King, who is played by Larry King and is, like, literally Larry King but a bee

did I mention that in the bee’s society, all the bees choose/are assigned honey-production jobs that they will work every day until they die, except like, there is evidence that other jobs exist - there is bee television, for instance, which would presumably require like, bee camera crews and bee producers and bee actors etc etc, so like, which bees are working those jobs? how does that work??

apparently in the world of this movie all you have to do to sue the entire human race is mail a letter

the whole court case comes down to the fact that no human being who isn’t a bee keeper has ever heard of a bee smoker and they all find it barbaric and horrifying

bee smokers in this world contain, like… nicotine and tar? like all the ingredients of actual commercial cigarettes? 

beekeepers in this world all hate bees, there is a scene where two beekeepers are making conversation with each other and their whole conversation is just about how much they hate bees, interspersed with manic cackling

instead of deliberating and coming back with a verdict the jury concludes the court case by just chanting “FREE THE BEES!” until the judge yells, “I FIND IN FAVOR OF THE BEES!!!!” 

AND THAT ISN’T EVEN THE END OF THE MOVIE there’s still like 20 minutes of plot I just

I can’t go on, I’m sorry