How do we get the two circles that encompass the Gaddverse (Baby Reindeer, Half Man) and The Amazing Digital Circus to become a Venn Diagram??
We know they’re two wildly different genres but they’re eventually telling the same story: traumatized AMABs who struggle with queer identity. They go against the Rainbow Capitalist, Gay Assimilate, LGBT Stereotype of “uwu I always knew I was Different™️ and once I Found My People, I was able to live as my True Authentic Self. Love and Acceptance saved me 🌈☀️🦋🌸”
Love and acceptance from outside sources don’t mean Jack Fucking Shit when you hate yourself!! And when you have a history of trauma, all you have is self hate!!!!!!!!!!
Ribbit’s love couldn’t save Jax. Kaufmo’s love couldn’t save Jax. Ragatha’s love couldn’t save Jax. Pomni’s love couldn’t save Jax. Because Jax didn’t, couldn’t, love Jax.
Just as Donny says about Teri: “I loved hating myself more than I loved her.” No amount of love, support, acceptance or care can get through to someone who is so intent on self sabotage and self hatred that they become abusive and hurt others, just to keep themselves safe, because their own self hate is all they know, all they feel comfortable in, all they feel control in. And these characters, Donny, Niall and Jax aren’t magically excused of their abusive actions just because they’re trauma victims, or queer, or anything else. They reject other people’s love in order to coddle their own festering, infected self hate in favor of healing, because healing and vulnerability and authenticity is too scary to them to even be an option.
