I'm tired, boss. I wanna go home.
#yesterday morning i debated to skip my thyroid meds because I only has two left#and delivery might not make it in time#but ultimately i went no better take it because when i miss like two in a week#my already fckd immune system fails even more and i get a fckn outbreak#and as it's the fckn summer event this saturday i didn't wanna look even more like a nasty ass fck up#and guess what i still got yesterday evening? go on. guess.... like. i sat down for dinner and was fine and ten min later i was like#wait a minute#thing is. i already felt kinda sickly when waking up but i thought it's the weather#and the fact that i'm massivly overworking myself with forced speed unloading at work all week#so here we are... this is the fifth time at least in the span of this last fckn fuck up of a year#i need to get my thyroid lvls checked because the last time it was this bad was ten years ago#right before the immune disease got figured out (by myself. mind u.)#and just now we were out on a walk and i looked down at the dog and thought to myself#how good she's walking today and that we can keep going a little farther#and just exactly with her next step she tripped and folded and knocked her nose against the ground#oh and when i ordered the meds i had to use their fckn app for the first time and just after placing my first order (which i had started#with the prescription meds so not directly on their loading page) their page cheerfully announced a 10% voucher for ur first order#and 15% if u sign in to their newsletter.. which i just automatically did when paying for that first order i literally juST HAD PLACED (: (:#and a whole bunch of summer coupons ofc i only got shown afterwards too#in other news: the lil man wont stop pissing on his own front legs. the dog has started to dripple in her sleep#it feels like my whole life smells like piss#the lil man's absurd reactions towards even people he knows has taken all the joy out of having dogs#the dog's care and mysterious illness has made me reach a limit i never expected to have#and i feel shame and guilt for not handling those situations (both her and his) better.#the og health thing is brewing another real bad flare up for the last couple of days and i'm only one bad thought away from it to boil over#and this is something i really need to get checked out and fixed but the last time was such a terrible experience which didn't even work#during the last week my ankles have also progressed for bad but whatever to worse and fckn hell this needs to be adressed#despite me buying new shoes from a blue collar worker brand explicitly for walking/standing all day#like. life just sucks and i'm falling apart and i'm fckn cursed.. whatever even slightly negative thing i think about happens..#and when i think positive thoughts (like the dog doing better eg) it turns around and gets fckd immediatly..
