REMADE

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

I don't think this is true, but I will wait for a ruling by the sacred boar that lives in the center of the earth

I was mugged by snow white and the seven dwarves the other day. six dwarves now, I suppose. kneed dipshit or dopey or whatever he was called in the eye socket so hard he died before his limp body hit the ground. they all scattered after that. I'll never forget how they wailed his name

can i come over and lick your himalayan salt lamp

I am, like, a long running proponent of the "eat something and you'll feel better" crowd and am often one of the first people to suggest "maybe it's time for a snack before I get whipped into a frenzy" but I really do resent how instantaneous it is. like it'll feel like I'm having my worst day in months and then I'll start eating and literally before I even finish I'm like oh yeah the world is beautiful

HAPPY BIG TWENTY NEIL

my love language is the same as a crow. if you’re nice to me i’ll bring you useless little trinkets from my travels that made me think of you

da2 is bad actually because every time it attempts to present a "moral" "quandary" it immediately undermines itself by foaming at the mouth ranting about how the real societal evil has been blood magic all along. dao is good actually because every time it attempts to present a "moral" "quandary" it immediately undermines itself by having morrigan shout "do it lol" from back of the group. they are NOT the same.