feel free to change pronouns / wording !
“ why can’t these guys write me a fuckin’ decent part ?! ”
“ oh, y’know what ? I’m sorry, I have the wrong number. ”
“ wait a minute, I know your voice. ”
“ i think he’s got a really sexy voice. ”
“ i can’t believe this. ”
“ why don’t you tell me who you are ? ”
“ she’s got a nice little … voice. ”
“ let’s play a little game. ”
“ jesus, you scared the shit out of me ! ”
“ i didn’t mean to scare ya ! ”
“ come on, open the door. ”
“ talking about how much fun it’s gonna be to rip your insides out. ”
“ why do you wanna kill me ? ”
“ being the best means being willing to do what the others would not. ”
“ i assume you’re not here for an autograph. ”
“ so if we stop making scary movies, what, all the psychos in the world will retire ? ”
“ i am my own character. ”
“ we are not in any danger. ”
“ cue the violins, right ? ”
“ i don’t mind you never returning my calls. ”
“ i’m surprised you thought about me at all. ”
“ do you see a camera ? ”
“ could i be more popular ? ”
“ why do you have so many secrets ? ”
“ it’s as if you don’t exist. ”
“ psychos can’t kill what they can’t find. ”
“ everything you touch dies. ”
“ i’m not happy that i’m thirty-five playing a twenty-one year old. ”
“ how the fuck are we supposed to learn our lines when there’s a new script every fifteen minutes ?! ”
“ brace yourself, all of this is actually not about you. ”
“ you’re not a detective. ”
“ ten more murders and we can publish a calendar. ”
“ very hannibal lecter. ”
“ god, it’s not the end of the world. ”
“ that is so easy for you to say. ”
“ i’m leaving my legacy. ”
“ the reason i’m here is to help you so that my death will not be in vain. ”
“ true trilogies are all about going back to the beginning and discovering something that wasn’t true from the get-go. ”
“ the past is not at rest. ”
“ basements creep me out. ”
“ so how can i help you ? or do you want me to tell you who you look like. ”
“ i wanted to make you proud. ”
“ you don’t deserve to be protected. ”
“ as if life isn’t tragic enough. ”
“ you see what i see, day in day out, the violence that people do to each other, you get haunted. ”
“ ghosts are tough, you can’t shoot ghosts. ”
“ i think what you saw is real. ”
“ how do i know that this is you and not the killer ? ”
“ the question isn’t who i am, the question is: who’s with me ? ”
“ do you have somewhere we can be … alone ? ”
“ you follow directions well. ”
“ now that we’re all here, the party can begin. ”
“ it’s your turn to scream, asshole ! ”
“ why don’t you take some fucking responsibility ? ”
“ i swear i’ll kill you ! ”
“ i guess we think alike. ”
“ he wasn’t superhuman, he wasn’t superhuman at all. ”