Iya

Scouring for your attention

As a vulture scavenges

For rotting carcasses.

To devour the crumbs

Of your meal,

Just to eat with you

At the table.

Cheap whiskey hangs

From your lips every night,

A bottle of beer not too far either.

One wrong move,

Your palm kisses my cheek.

I take the beatings from dirt caked Hands, and imagine you

Softly holding me instead.

Bright red markings

On my neck when we sleep on

The same bed (love bites, is it,

Or cigarette burns?).

Turning a blind eye when you

Bare your teeth before you sink Your canines into my body.

This love you barely give is Nauseating, but it is still

Love nonetheless (I'd love not

To love you someday).

I hug the pillows your head

Rested on the next morning,

Your scent is poison in my lungs.

You feed me scraps of your love,

You leave through the front door,

yet you come knocking in my dreams;

You hide in the back of my head,

popping out when I thought I could finally forget;

You sink deep into my bones,

I scratch my skin raw trying to get you out;

Your scent, your taste, even the curves of your body,

it is embedded into my soul;

You were gone,

A dim, dark room lit up by almost dead neon lights;

It fills my ears, the loud banging of drums and the shrieking electric guitar;

The sickening smell of alcohol covers the room, I take a sip of the beer, though it tastes like lead;

You hold my hand and drag me to the dance floor, hoping to atleast make this night memorable;

The night wasn't great, it could not even be described as good;

But you sway your hips to the beat, the bright shine in your eyes almost blinding;

And it was perfect;

LOYALTY OF A TRAITOR

"He is a traitor.

We do not care for him."

Those are the words I repeat in my head over and over again

For I know, dear

You would've been

dead without me

Traitor

Ah, what a lovely sight

You chained up

Nowhere to go

But this isn't you, is it?

For I know who you are

I am your partner, aren't I?

The one who you hurt most

Traitor

We are together again

Covered in blood and bruises

Still the same as always

as 4 years ago

But you are still loyal to

me aren't you, darling?

You would rather be hit by bullets a hundred times then see me hurt

I know we aren't

the same anymore

But I know you are

not who you were

You have seen the light

But you left me in the darkness

Chuuya's perspective

Part 2 of "How Much"

In my Perspective

In my perspective you never wanted me

You would always shut me out

And tease me

In my perspective you never cared

You never cared for people

Never cared, never cared

But I know you did

In my perspective I saw a boy with hopes and needs

In my perspective you were just trying to live

You shouldn't have gone through that

Shouldn't have been manipulated and abused because of your power

In my perspective you've had everything

But I was to naive to see what you had to go through

When you left I thought it was just a joke

When you left nothing hurt more

Dazai's pov

How Much

You don't know how much

I love you

I'd burn the world in order to

save you

No matter what people say you are enough

You are better than me

Prettier, Better, Loved

I always tease and tell you to do better

Yet I'd be devastated when you'd hurt yourself

You don't know how much you mean to me

I'd carry you on my back the very first time you fell

You don't know how terrifying it was to see you covered in blood

How relived I was to see you breathing

You don't know how much

I love you