*is better than you in Spanish*

wiping my cheeto dust hands on your shirt. i want to build a beautiful life with you

not a caller not a texter but a secret third thing

don’t contact me. ever

got my first ever official customer complaint because when i was going over the terms of their life insurance they were like "well i don't plan to die" and i was like "well you're going to"

match my yearn

everything’s gonna be okay allegedly

God sometimes I'm writing smut and I'll like, delete a sentence because I'm like, no, I can't write that. It's too indulgent. And then it's like. Girl, what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins. Get real.

"what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins" is honestly the thing I needed to hear today

when life gives you lemons squeeze them in a mans eye