you know ;)

if i was a popular minecraft youtuber id just tweet "hey guys stop drawing shipping fanart of me and my friends/coworkers, i only fucked one of them and seeing me paired with anyone else is kinda weird and crosses my boundaries" and then i'd turn my phone off

what is it they put in the hardware store to make it smell so good

i just apolitically killed the king like i have no agenda or whatever im just the jester here but i stabbed him anyway LOL all the courtiers and advisors are trying really hard to figure out who did it LOL all of them wanted him dead but they dont know whose scheme it was so nobody can promulgate a coherent political maneuver based on the circumstances LOL just playing my lute #MyLute

odysseus tying himself to the mast but he's doing some proto shibari type shit to make his tits look really good and his crew isn't saying anything but it's kind of hard not to notice

Chihuahuas Georg

i'd truly be fucked in her situation because rumpelstiltskin is not a name that would come to mind for me

kicking my feet and giggling like a schoolgirl in love to myself while muttering "i'm going to kill you. i'm going to fucking kill you"

*explodes into a shower of gore and when the red mist clears i'm completely fine but wearing a different outfit*

These are all on sale for $12 each for now! Get 'em while you can!

it's totally ok to dislike things. right?

the thing twitter has over tumblr is the ability to have handles next to your url which is especially good in the case of environmental storytelling, for example the person that tweeted something like "every time a gay person [does something nonserious] I go to chick fil a" as an obvious joke and their handle in the screenshot was "[name] the GAY IM GAY" you really cant get that level of storytelling here

Shoutout to weird girls who became weird boys and weird boys who became weird girls and weird girls and boys who became both or neither. Let's all be weird and strange together