Hazey

^every pharmacist ever hired

Your 20s are not about getting your life together they're about learning to escape the self imposed torture labyrinth you've built inside your own head

“when i was little” brother you are 5’3. so you must mean yesterday. or five minutes ago.

“i'll be there shortly” yeah. we know.

when you put your penis inside her and then move back and forth 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

im gonna make it big someday just you watch

*goes back to jerkin it*

Brittany apgar is so fucking speedy and we should talk about that more

you can have sex with music or abstract concepts but we still haven't found a way to have sex with people

pork dumplings are so good. i could eat 30 of these things and then cum myself so hard i pass out