having to be “mature” at a young age sucks bc you aren’t really “mature-mature” you’re a child playing at a maturity bc you don’t have the foundation to be the bigger person when conflict arrives so what you do is ignore it bc ignoring a problem and being happy about a resolution look the same to your inexperienced eyes. Then you get adults praising you for a development above your peers but you aren’t really developing. You’re stagnant. Your peers will grow up and experience things and make mistakes and grow from them but you will keep yourself in this box, ignoring things ignoring ignoring ignoring until one day you have to face the fact… it wasn’t maturity you had. It was fear. And now you’re an adult too and you make all of your choices based on an emotional risk/costs analysis bc you don’t know any emotion other than fear & you have to start healing from your own childhood by making peace that you weren’t really a mature child. You were just a child who was given too much to carry & didn’t know how to say “no”.

*looks at my selfies* *looks at videos of myself* *looks in the mirror* so what is the truth

turns out my life purpose isn’t supposed to be as small and silent and accommodating and convenient as possible

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

just here to ruin your day and tell you that in about two weeks Tik Tok by Kesha is 10 years old